Brilliant Gameologists Forum
General Gab => Off Topic Fun => : BobismyRhino September 30, 2008, 09:47:10 PM
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I was sitting at the back of the classroom in my Sociology class today, paying absolutely no attention to what the presenter was talking about, when my friend started typing on my computer.
He started writing random mandarin words, like mao= cat, gou = dog, and then proceeded to ask me:
Ju, pronounced jew, means what in mandarin?
Clearly, I have no idea since I haven't ever taken any mandarin classes.
He promptly types the answer: pig.
I lol'd. It was terrible. Everyone turned around and stared at me and I just buried my face into my hands and tried to act like I was coughing. It didn't help my credibility that he was laughing too.
This also made me crack up while I was at home. http://brilliantgameologists.com/boards/index.php?topic=925.460 (http://brilliantgameologists.com/boards/index.php?topic=925.460)
But anywho, what makes you all lol?
I'm sorta sick/fighting off sickness right now, and as they say (whoever they are): "laughter is the best medicine."
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Well, either yours or his mandarin sucks, because pig is pronounced "zhu", with emphasis on the z and h, rather than ju, which incidentally, sounds nothing at all like "jew".
For me, nothing much these days. Seems the news tend to make me go :wall over seemingly random acts of stupidity, like students being suspended for bring a pencil sharpener to school (apparently at odds with the school's no weapons policy) and policemen tasering a helpless teenager who was paralyzed from the waist down because he "did not comply with the officer's orders". :fo
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Oh gawd... That was horrible. That was pretty much the antithesis of a lol. So cruel and tragic...
I demand happiness now! Off and away with you. Do not return until you find something happy! Or fuzzy. I'll take either at this point.
Do it or I shall have to scream Ni at you!
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I once saw my professor bend over and eat a skittle off the table.
Later on, I heard his phone ring in his office once. He went to get it and the guy on the other side hung up. Then it rang again, and again just once. Then he lost his keys because he kept going to answer the phone.
Well, the keys were in his pocket.
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Today, Shewolf and I went with our friend and Shewolf's boyfriend to Waffle House.
The 4 of us are sitting at the table, and her boyfriend steals every-fucking-thing from out mutual friend. Straw, napkin, fork, etc. When he's collected everything, she reaches over to retrieve something for him and knocks her glass of water over and onto her boyfriend's lap.
So there's like two minutes of silence as everyone stares at someone else. Then the waitress comes walking up, and I turn to Shewolf's boyfriend and break the silence with, "Well look at the bright side, you can piss yourself right now and no one can tell."
This prompted the waitress, a middle-age mother of 3 (so we learned) to LOL, which prompted our friend to respond to the boyfriend with a "Do it. Piss yourself right now." And all of the restaurant (~4 other people) broke out laughing at that point. :D
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For me, nothing much these days. Seems the news tend to make me go :wall over seemingly random acts of stupidity, like students being suspended for bring a pencil sharpener to school (apparently at odds with the school's no weapons policy) and policemen tasering a helpless teenager who was paralyzed from the waist down because he "did not comply with the officer's orders". :fo
Wow! What is that place?
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http://www.islandpacket.com/news/local/story/607283.html (http://www.islandpacket.com/news/local/story/607283.html)
Can't find the other article off hand.
Still, I did recall a few news articles, but I am not sure if chuckling at them makes me a bad person. :-\
http://www.stuff.co.nz/4705471a12.html
Train kills couple having sex on tracks...
BTW, how do I rename a link to show the title of the article?
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[url = X] TITLE [/ url ]
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Our school has always had rather shitty slogans for each class, but this week, when posters went up all over the school, they took the cake. The slogan for the class of 2010 was "We Take Your Men."
...Apparently, I am now a man-whore. How could you write something like that and seriously find nothing wrong with it?
Oh, and one of today's lunch items was "Pea's". No, that's not a typo, that's how it was written on the board. As an added bonus, it was written in yellow on a white background and looked like something totally different from farther away.
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My class slogan was "get-'er-done."
Not even fucking "Git-R-Done," but that bastardized horseshit that was an abomination of the abomination of redneck humor.
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I have no idea what my class slogan was.
I didn't care. I still don't.
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My class slogan was "get-'er-done."
Not even fucking "Git-R-Done," but that bastardized horseshit that was an abomination of the abomination of redneck humor.
I feel sorry for anyone who has to deal with people that think Larry the Cable Guy is funny on a daily basis... including myself.
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My class slogan was "get-'er-done."
Not even fucking "Git-R-Done," but that bastardized horseshit that was an abomination of the abomination of redneck humor.
I feel sorry for anyone who has to deal with people that think Larry the Cable Guy is funny on a daily basis... including myself.
Y'know in my movie review job I'm officially allowed to blast Larry as much as I want too. Andy Dick and Uwe Boll are the only other 2 who have that distinction.
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Today, Shewolf and I went with our friend and Shewolf's boyfriend to Waffle House.
The 4 of us are sitting at the table, and her boyfriend steals every-fucking-thing from out mutual friend. Straw, napkin, fork, etc. When he's collected everything, she reaches over to retrieve something for him and knocks her glass of water over and onto her boyfriend's lap.
So there's like two minutes of silence as everyone stares at someone else. Then the waitress comes walking up, and I turn to Shewolf's boyfriend and break the silence with, "Well look at the bright side, you can piss yourself right now and no one can tell."
This prompted the waitress, a middle-age mother of 3 (so we learned) to LOL, which prompted our friend to respond to the boyfriend with a "Do it. Piss yourself right now." And all of the restaurant (~4 other people) broke out laughing at that point. :D
Of course, the part you're leaving out is that my boyfriend informed the waitress that she couldn't bring me another glass of water unless it was in a sippy cup.
Later, when she did bring me a glass, she made sure it was ok with him that it wasn't in a sippy cup...She was also reluctant to give me silverware.
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My class slogan was "get-'er-done."
Not even fucking "Git-R-Done," but that bastardized horseshit that was an abomination of the abomination of redneck humor.
I feel sorry for anyone who has to deal with people that think Larry the Cable Guy is funny on a daily basis... including myself.
Y'know in my movie review job I'm officially allowed to blast Larry as much as I want too. Andy Dick and Uwe Boll are the only other 2 who have that distinction.
Any company that recognizes Uwe Boll as a bad director is doing something right.
Any person who compares LtCG to Mencia is doing it right. Those two are poor examples of popular comedians. I'm all for acting out stereotypes on TV, but not in Stand Up. The fact that both of those comedians have their own shows/movies is proof that America is in need of quality comedians. We are not all idiots, you know.
What's worse: Some of their viewers are the stereotypes they portray. When ou are watching a show insult an ethnic group, please try not to be a member of that group. We have enough Truth in Television as it is. We don't need people confirming that the stereotypes exist and are as dumb as they are portrayed.
Note that Chappel is an exception, as it is usually not him doing the skits he airs (most of his material is fan-submitted, his actual jokes actually have a standard to meet). Larry and Mencia have no standards outside of their usual jokes.
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And what really pisses me off is that Larry the Cable guy isn't even a redneck, he's a college educated northerner who makes a living making fun of country people.
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The review I wrote for Delta Farce:
http://www.movieretriever.com/movies/1694522/Delta-Farce
do you think I was fair?
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The review I wrote for Delta Farce:
http://www.movieretriever.com/movies/1694522/Delta-Farce
do you think I was fair?
I see no splatters of virgin blood or cow feces on the review, so I must say that you were not harsh enough.
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The review I wrote for Delta Farce:
http://www.movieretriever.com/movies/1694522/Delta-Farce
do you think I was fair?
I see no splatters of virgin blood or cow feces on the review, so I must say that you were not harsh enough.
Well it is meant for a family audience so there are some restrictions...
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So I check my spam filter to make sure nothing important gets trapped there by accident...
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:lol You would get something like that in your spam.
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A while back, I was away from my internet access for a week, so naturally I had 2000+ spam loads sitting in my inbox. On a whim, I decided to separate out the 'penis growth' from the rest of the spam. Assuming that it worked as advertised and assuming that I chose to follow every one*, my penis would have grown by over 6 feet.
*wrong assumption on both counts
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So I check my spam filter to make sure nothing important gets trapped there by accident...
:o
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A while back, I was away from my internet access for a week, so naturally I had 2000+ spam loads sitting in my inbox. On a whim, I decided to separate out the 'penis growth' from the rest of the spam. Assuming that it worked as advertised and assuming that I chose to follow every one*, my penis would have grown by over 6 feet.
*wrong assumption on both counts
Natural reach weapon, anyone? :evillaugh
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http://brilliantgameologists.com/boards/index.php?topic=2179.0
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Last night I thought it was pretty funny too.
I lol'ed at this: http://www.menagea3.net/d/20080918.html
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'supports to adult males in reverse cowgirl'
my minds eye is blind...
must share it.. :)
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Jim Norton.
That, and faery tales for Drow (http://www.drowtales.com/mainarchive.php?order=date&id=10&chibi=1&extra=1&check=1).
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http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0253.html
I'm not a big OOTS fan, but this is funny.
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http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0398.html (http://www.giantitp.com/comics/oots0398.html) group hug
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:lol I *heart* OOTS
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Oooh! I meant to mention this one 'cause it made me ROFL and get pissed at the same time.
My bird (my baby) got really sick, so I took him to the vet. The vet, as he's looking him over says to me, "My, he's fat." I scrunch my nose. He just called my baby FAT. Beaker is perfect. :P Shut up.
And then, as he's still restraining my pissed off bird and looking him over, he says to Beaker, "You'd better hide during Thanksgiving..."
That one made me crack up. EVERYONE that's met him, including my vet, wants to eat him. :rolleyes
Poor Beaky.
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Does he look delicious?
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No. He's a tiny bird. Barely any meat on him. But he's annoying enough that people want to kill him. And it just so happens that this group of people doesn't believe in wasting things, so that little bit of meat needs to be eaten.
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No. He's a tiny bird. Barely any meat on him. But he's annoying enough that people want to kill him. And it just so happens that this group of people doesn't believe in wasting things, so that little bit of meat needs to be eaten.
Makes sense. You should send Beaker to Africa. :couch
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I once sent spam mail to myself.
I don't know how it happened.
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No. He's a tiny bird. Barely any meat on him. But he's annoying enough that people want to kill him. And it just so happens that this group of people doesn't believe in wasting things, so that little bit of meat needs to be eaten.
:ahem
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xpcUxwpOQ_A (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xpcUxwpOQ_A) Beaker doesn't look that tasty to me.
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If anyone ever said any of my pets were so annoying they wanted to kill them, retribution would be exacted. Of course, people who displease me tend to wake up wrapping in webbing, assuming they wake up at all.
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If anyone ever said any of my pets were so annoying they wanted to kill them, retribution would be exacted. Of course, people who displease me tend to wake up wrapping in webbing, assuming they wake up at all.
If anyone said that about my pets, I'd be forced to concur.
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xpcUxwpOQ_A (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xpcUxwpOQ_A) Beaker doesn't look that tasty to me.
By the way, this made me so happy...
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No. He's a tiny bird. Barely any meat on him. But he's annoying enough that people want to kill him. And it just so happens that this group of people doesn't believe in wasting things, so that little bit of meat needs to be eaten.
I just wanna eat him 'cos hes small, easy to catch and looks tasty...friends of mine are not allowed to own hamsters...
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Y'know I'm told Guinea pigs are a delicacy somewhere...
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*burp*
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What??
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Anyone who tries to eat my pets gets their name in the book. Mostly because the pet has more value to me than they do.
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Anyone who tries to eat my pets gets their name in the book. Mostly because the pet has more value to me than they do.
You know strangely I'd probably get into a fight defending critters before I would people.
Or maybe not so strangely people suck,
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xpcUxwpOQ_A (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xpcUxwpOQ_A) Beaker doesn't look that tasty to me.
By the way, this made me so happy...
Glad I could help
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Anyone who tries to eat my pets gets their name in the book. Mostly because the pet has more value to me than they do.
You know strangely I'd probably get into a fight defending critters before I would people.
Or maybe not so strangely people suck,
Plus Fucking One.
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If everyone else gets a turn when gangbanging reality, but you get to by her dinner, and don't get laid. You are the one whose suffering unduly.
:lol
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(http://fc18.deviantart.com/fs37/f/2008/286/2/8/Being_Mature_by_Crux_Coudray.jpg)
Need I even say why?
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OMG :lol
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If everyone else gets a turn when gangbanging reality, but you get to by her dinner, and don't get laid. You are the one whose suffering unduly.
:lol
I am amazed that Midnight_v knows so much about my life that he can sum it up so eloquently.
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If everyone else gets a turn when gangbanging reality, but you get to by her dinner, and don't get laid. You are the one whose suffering unduly.
:lol
I am amazed that Midnight_v knows so much about my life that he can sum it up so eloquently.
Just your love life, seeing as you've bitched about it enough for most of us to have a good idea of what it was like. ;)
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This isn't entirely lolworthy, but I'm feeling amused by it at the moment.
The fact you can have two people who agree on something and yet still disagree with each other.
We humans are a pretty fucked up species.
Sometimes that's depressing. Right now, that's pretty funny. I'm not sure why.
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http://forums.gleemax.com/showthread.php?t=1100124
The Tome of Roflmao: Book of LoL BrB BBQ.
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http://forums.gleemax.com/showthread.php?t=1100124
The Tome of Roflmao: Book of LoL BrB BBQ.
Plus Fucking One.
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The Tome of Roflmao: Book of LoL BrB BBQ.
Penny(is?) Arcade makes me lol more.
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A certain resident troll, and the smiting thereof.
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On request by Sunic, a crosspost from the second Fail thread:
Not a thread, but a RL conversation:
Mr. X: "Hey, you know something about Fighter-Mages. Help me make one. Which armour should I use?"
Awesome me: "If you don't have an ASF class ability, use a Mithral Twilight Chainshirt. You can't go wrong with that."
X: "But in an AMF my gear loses its magical qualities. Ha! You made a mistake!"
Me: "An AMF, riiiight. Why worry about ASF then?"
X: "Because I'm a Fighter-*Mage*, silly. You should think before you answer."
Me: "Let's go play Monopoly, ok?"
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A picture paints a thousand words...
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A picture paints a thousand words...
Wasn't Dokuro-chan a little TOO obvious for that poster?
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To be honest, I have no idea who that was. I just found the dichotomy of a little girl with a big-arse spiked bat hilarious when coupled with the words "clue" and "bat" :D
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For reference: the little girl in question is from an anime called Bokusatsu Tenshi Dokuro-chan (something like "Beat to Death Angel Dokuro-chan"). The anime in question mainly consists of said little girl whacking people repeatedly with that spiked bat for the most inane reasons.
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That's so stupid it's hilarious.
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That's so stupid it's hilarious.
Watch Excel Saga, then.
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So the party in my game fights some intermediate and greater demons. They win, but not before Moonlight (unicorn cohort) dies and will need a Res, thereby losing a level. Bender (another cohort) is also behind due to crafting + house rule allowing another willing creature to pay XP crafting costs. In other words, he covered his own equipment.
Uzelli is a PC, who is down about half a level due to heavy crafting.
One of my players responds to a post I made suggesting ways they could recover from being three levels behind.
Bender, Uzelli and Moonlight can go do sidequests to get some extra xp.... titles of the action :D
Dorothy and Tin Man... back in Oz Again! (Bender and Uzelli gets transported to another Plane. The adventure isn't over until Uzelli levels and is forced to take Plane Shift as her new spell.)
Hottie and Horny and the Fisting Machine (threesome! Bender gets a Battlefist in the adventure)
101 Orcs (Moonlight vs. an advanced Orc horde... because she won't get XP for low level orcs)
Unhorned and Unhallowed (A powerful curse made by a Lich removes Moonlights horn and she's left without most of her powers. For reasons only low XP can explain.. only Bender can help her. Bonus is Moonlight gets a 150% share of xp for going thru the adventure without her horn. Twist? Benders negative weapon is no help against the Lich.)
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I'd go with Hottie, Horny and the Fisting Machine. Sounds fun.
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I'd go with Hottie, Horny and the Fisting Machine. Sounds fun.
That one made me LOL the most too. :P
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Well, either yours or his mandarin sucks, because pig is pronounced "zhu", with emphasis on the z and h, rather than ju, which incidentally, sounds nothing at all like "jew".
My wife is Chinese and has taught me a bit of Mandarin, and it certainly sounds like "Jew" when she says it.
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Not really. Jew is usually pronounced "Joo" with a lower tone at the end, while pig in Mandarin is has a shorter tone with a higher tone at the end like "Ju".
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Tonal phonics make my brain fucking hurt.
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Not really. Jew is usually pronounced "Joo" with a lower tone at the end, while pig in Mandarin is has a shorter tone with a higher tone at the end like "Ju".
I was ignoring the tonal part, because yeah, it makes my head hurt too... It's hard for people whose native language is atonal (me...) to even consciously hear them without practice. I can reproduce the words correctly, including tones, without realizing it sometimes, though. I'm pretty good at remembering music and song lyrics, and imitating them, and if I do the same thing when imitating Mandarin, it usually works to get the tones right. ;)
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:lol
Yeah. Usually when a native English speaker tries to speak Chinese, it makes me laugh or cringe because English is atonal and Chinese is tonal. It usually ends up as a flat, monotone even though his normal English would not be a monotone. You can see them in the old Chinese movies/serials.
Yeah, I know it is bad f me to laugh, but I just can't help it :P
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Yeah. Usually when a native English speaker tries to speak Chinese, it makes me laugh or cringe because English is atonal and Chinese is tonal. It usually ends up as a flat, monotone even though his normal English would not be a monotone. You can see them in the old Chinese movies/serials.
Try watching an English speaker speaking Portuguese, then. Hilarious.
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Try watching an English speaker speaking Portuguese, then. Hilarious.
Or a japanese speaking portuguese. :D
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Or anyone speaking Finnish, including us.
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Running Tshern's sig line through a couple of different online Finnish-English translators made me both LOL and say 'you're doing it wrong!'
1st try: Sillä guilt obedience love , it efficacy vammoistamme scoop , soon snuff pesää build. :shrug
2nd try: With it the guilt loves an obedient one, it draws power from our injuries, soon the nest will build of them. Something seems missing from the translation.....
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Running Tshern's sig line through a couple of different online Finnish-English translators made me both LOL and say 'you're doing it wrong!'
1st try: Sillä guilt obedience love , it efficacy vammoistamme scoop , soon snuff pesää build. :shrug
2nd try: With it the guilt loves an obedient one, it draws power from our injuries, soon the nest will build of them. Something seems missing from the translation.....
Let me try...
Because of guilt on the balls of love, it vammoistamme strength to scoop up, and soon they build nests
WTF?
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Sillä syyllisyys kuuliaista rakastaa, se voimaa vammoistamme ammentaa, pian niistä pesää rakentaa
Silly sylvans aren't cooler than rakshasas. Vamoose! Amen, that plan is nice - I'm raking in the pesas.
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Or a japanese speaking portuguese.
Risada, were you a student of Isao Ishibashi's, by chance?
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Or a japanese speaking portuguese.
Risada, were you a student of Isao Ishibashi's, by chance?
Nope, I said this 'cause I know one of my friend's relatives and it seems that he bought a single cross class point in Speak Language (Portuguese)... and 'cause of the japanese dudes that come every year to the anime events...
Pardon me, but this person you speak of works in which school? :smirk
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"Sillä syyllisyys kuuliaista rakastaa, se voimaa vammoistamme ammentaa, pian niistä pesää rakentaa" --> "Because guilt loves the obedient one, it draws strength from our injuries and soon builds a nest of them"
Something like that. The previous quote was a lot better, but I eventually grew tired of it.
Edit: Silly typo.
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Discussing the latest Presidential debate with my friend:
Me: "McCain really wants everyone to know he wants to pull down taxes. Tries to make sure everyone thinks Obama wants to drown all citizens to a heap of new expenditures and taxes."
Friend: "Well, he is sort of right, Obama is pro-tax in some cases. Then again, McCain will also bring back non-commercial Christmas, find El Dorado and he knows where is Waldo. He is clearly having the upperhand here."
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Obama clearly has the upper-hand, what with being the brother to Jesus.
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A thing that made me :lol
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LkCNJRfSZBU
And the fact I know a guy who is very active on Youtube who hasn't seen it.
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http://www.giantitp.com/articles/Cc85LTNvTgOuH1xTRjz.html
Gingerbread golems? Definately funny. :lol
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Pardon me, but this person you speak of works in which school?
He's a Japanese teacher at PUCRS in Porto Alegre, Brasil.
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So I found this hilarious game. It contains a number of PCs that started around 5 and I think are 9 now.
Just to give you some of the highlights:
Constantly casting CLW from wands in combat all around.
Wizard who loves a CL 1st Magic Missile, and DC 14 CL 5th Lightning Bolt.
CW Samurai who opened his first combat by breaking his own treasure, and took nearly an entire chapter to figure out he was better off just using his Katana as a two handed weapon. He still has yet to do 20 damage in a round. Ever.
DM arbitrarily making up random house rules.
Healbot clerics.
Melee druid, sans Wild Shape. Admittedly, he's still the best in the party as this lets him buff himself and his AC at the same time.
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Wat.
Needs in-depth playtest notes.
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Wat.
Needs in-depth playtest notes.
Another fun bit is the Wizard who decides to just stop fighting in the middle of combat and fuck around while his allies are still in combat.
Also, there's a Barbarian getting 3 attacks a round and still only doing 21 damage.
The DM seems to love telling people exactly what to do on every round. :eh
I'll see if I can find a funny combat.
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I was going to post this on the Fail Redux thread, but since I'm still ROFL'ing from it, I guess this is the place for it...
What happens when a player complains about the lack of sexy monsters? (http://forums.gleemax.com/showthread.php?p=17012139#post17012139)
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I was going to post this on the Fail Redux thread, but since I'm still ROFL'ing from it, I guess this is the place for it...
What happens when a player complains about the lack of sexy monsters? (http://forums.gleemax.com/showthread.php?p=17012139#post17012139)
I'd like to say something pithy but words have failed me...
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See, I just wish sexy monsters existed in real life. And wanted to have sex with me.
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Ulterior motives regarding your lifeforce notwithstanding?
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Not all of them drain souls. :P
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all the females iv ever dealt with did... :D
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all the females iv ever dealt with did... :D
Ok, let's try this another way. Not all of them inflict negative levels. Course, I've already snatched up the best shapeshifter babes. :P
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Course, I've already snatched up the best shapeshifter babes. :P
Let me remind you, Sunic is a shapeshifter babe. ;)
(http://i10.photobucket.com/albums/a115/abgab23/kitsune_girl.jpg)
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:lol
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Kits= Awesome.
Wannabe Kits= Utter bull shit.
Sunic= actual Kit.
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Let me remind you all those stories about shifting into a human female are perpetuated by horny human males. See also: Rule 34. If you are taking these as a credible source, you automatically fail at life. Be a hero.
To address the actual question: While I can assume female forms as easily as male forms, I have no desire to do so on the grounds I am not attracted to males and can work with females better when I have the actual equipment to do so. That, and I would have to devote even more of my time to smiting imbeciles as everyone with a cock would be trying to get in my pants. Therefore, assuming a female form is completely unproductive at best and most likely problematic as well.
Also, Sinfire gets it.
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Let me remind you all those stories about shifting into a human female are perpetuated by horny human males. See also: Rule 34. If you are taking these as a credible source, you automatically fail at life. Be a hero.
To address the actual question: While I can assume female forms as easily as male forms, I have no desire to do so on the grounds I am not attracted to males and can work with females better when I have the actual equipment to do so. That, and I would have to devote even more of my time to smiting imbeciles as everyone with a cock would be trying to get in my pants. Therefore, assuming a female form is completely unproductive at best and most likely problematic as well.
Also, Sinfire gets it.
But the ability to assume a female form is useful for getting your girlfriend to question herself...
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http://forums.gleemax.com/showthread.php?t=1103499 (http://forums.gleemax.com/showthread.php?t=1103499)
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Females make too easy prey. One must deal from a position of strength.
Yes, I did prepare Immediate action wards this morning. Not to mention the obvious Explosive Runes. Why do you ask?
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http://forums.gleemax.com/showthread.php?t=1103499 (http://forums.gleemax.com/showthread.php?t=1103499)
WotC fails again!!
SiFir are you sure you are posting on the right thread?
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http://forums.gleemax.com/showthread.php?t=1103499 (http://forums.gleemax.com/showthread.php?t=1103499)
WotC fails again!!
SiFir are you sure you are posting on the right thread?
The errata makes me laugh. The other thread is for threads that fail, not companies that fail.
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http://forums.gleemax.com/showthread.php?t=1103499 (http://forums.gleemax.com/showthread.php?t=1103499)
WotC fails again!!
SiFir are you sure you are posting on the right thread?
The errata makes me laugh. The other thread is for threads that fail, not companies that fail.
Damn right :lol
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Racial jokes, those of you who can't take a little black humour, do not bother.
[spoiler](http://img.ircimages.com/ircimages/2/2/223e76972924f27c16fa3b8500774436.jpg)
(http://img.ircimages.com/ircimages/9/9/998930684ca59ad621b3ac89191c19fb.jpg)[/spoiler]
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I'm guessing there's a maker for those somewhere.
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Racial jokes, those of you who can't take a little black humour, do not bother.
Basically sums up the political debates, from what I've heard about them.
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http://forums.gleemax.com/showthread.php?t=1103499 (http://forums.gleemax.com/showthread.php?t=1103499)
I think I just ruptured a kidney from laughing.
-
Maybe it was intentional for the lols?
-
Maybe it was intentional for the lols?
My thoughts exactly.
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Today during my Japanese class, we were learning how to talk on the phone and hold a conversation. We split up into groups and me and my friend Aaron stumbled through the example conversation in an attempt to learn the language. We started laughing at how bad we massacred it...
Then I got the great idea to practice with the teacher.
Me: Sensei! *I make a phone out of my hand and go "bring bring"*
Sensei: Ah! *makes a phone and holds it to her head* "Moshi moshi!"
Me: (since i hate romanji, I'll just write what we said) "Hi, is this the *insert her last name* residence?
Sensei: Yes
Me: Is *insert her name* sensei there?" (the example that was given in the book had said no)
Sensei: Yes, that's who's speaking.
Me: Oh... *pause*
This is where Aaron starts laughing at me since I had no idea what to say next.
Me: Hi
Sensei: Hi
Me: I'll call you later. Goodbye (politely).
Sensei: (in between laughter) Goodbye.
That can only be topped by the "phone call" between the two Chinese kids:
Azn1: Hi, is this the *insert random name* residence?
Azn2: No
Azn1: Goodbye (politely)
I enjoyed class today.
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^ ROFL
This convo happened last night...
M: Dude, I can't picture you having sex. At all.
O: I'm glad you can't picture me having sex. I don't want you to ever picture me having sex. I don't picture anyone here having sex.
M: Yeah, but you could.
O: What does that mean?
M: I can't picture you having sex. I can picture him or him or him having sex, but you, you're just a black bar.
S: *starts laughing* Censor bars.
*everyone starts laughing*
--Two minutes later--
M: So we all know what you're doing for thanksgiving. You're dressing up as a turkey...
O: Fuck yeah. For $14 an hour, I'll wear a fucking turkey suit all day at work.
M: You didn't let me finish. You're dressing up as a turkey and then a group of pilgrims is going to rape you.
S: He'd do that for $9 an hour. *starts laughing*
O: Hot pilgrims, yeah.
J: Dude, have you ever seen pictures of old school pilgrims?
M: Yeah, not hot pilgrims, real pilgrims. With that turkey neck thing flapping around, and I don't know why you're making turkey noises, but I can picture THAT. You having sex, no. But that I can picture.
*everyone breaks down laughing for about five minutes*
O: FUCK YOU! Shut the fuck up!
-
...What the Fuckity Fuckstar.
-
^ ROFL
This convo happened last night...
M: Dude, I can't picture you having sex. At all.
O: I'm glad you can't picture me having sex. I don't want you to ever picture me having sex. I don't picture anyone here having sex.
M: Yeah, but you could.
O: What does that mean?
M: I can't picture you having sex. I can picture him or him or him having sex, but you, you're just a black bar.
S: *starts laughing* Censor bars.
*everyone starts laughing*
--Two minutes later--
M: So we all know what you're doing for thanksgiving. You're dressing up as a turkey...
O: Fuck yeah. For $14 an hour, I'll wear a fucking turkey suit all day at work.
M: You didn't let me finish. You're dressing up as a turkey and then a group of pilgrims is going to rape you.
S: He'd do that for $9 an hour. *starts laughing*
O: Hot pilgrims, yeah.
J: Dude, have you ever seen pictures of old school pilgrims?
M: Yeah, not hot pilgrims, real pilgrims. With that turkey neck thing flapping around, and I don't know why you're making turkey noises, but I can picture THAT. You having sex, no. But that I can picture.
*everyone breaks down laughing for about five minutes*
O: FUCK YOU! Shut the fuck up!
Teasing Friends: entertaining people for generations.
-
And a significant cause of death for generations too :P
-
And a significant cause of death for generations too
Only if combined with alcohol, or if source of teasing is from a (knowingly) small penis.
-
Tell that to Hitler. Milo Goldberg teased him about his paintings once too many ;)
Yes, I somehow managed to Godwin the thread... :smirk
-
Tell that to Hitler. Milo Goldberg teased him about his paintings once too many
That's different... Hitler felt absurdly small in the pants.
-
I was watching the old school Star Wars movies today... and when R2 came on, my bird started imitating him. It made me LOL. He can be so cute sometimes. And sometimes, not so much...
-
Is Beaker OK now?
-
I was watching the old school Star Wars movies today... and when R2 came on, my bird started imitating him. It made me LOL. He can be so cute sometimes. And sometimes, not so much...
Hahaha :lol
That's awesome. Best mental picture of this week.
-
(http://i524.photobucket.com/albums/cc323/RavinRay/DnD/motivator8113428.jpg)
:P
-
http://brilliantgameologists.com/boards/index.php?topic=2369.msg73131#msg73131
In the spoiler. I laughed hard at that.
-
Plus Fucking One.
-
Beaker's okay now. Stormy, on the otherhand (my 22 year old Cockatiel) is not feeling so great though. I think his arthritis is starting to get to him. :-\
-
^ ROFL
This convo happened last night...
M: Dude, I can't picture you having sex. At all.
O: I'm glad you can't picture me having sex. I don't want you to ever picture me having sex. I don't picture anyone here having sex.
M: Yeah, but you could.
O: What does that mean?
M: I can't picture you having sex. I can picture him or him or him having sex, but you, you're just a black bar.
S: *starts laughing* Censor bars.
*everyone starts laughing*
--Two minutes later--
M: So we all know what you're doing for thanksgiving. You're dressing up as a turkey...
O: Fuck yeah. For $14 an hour, I'll wear a fucking turkey suit all day at work.
M: You didn't let me finish. You're dressing up as a turkey and then a group of pilgrims is going to rape you.
S: He'd do that for $9 an hour. *starts laughing*
O: Hot pilgrims, yeah.
J: Dude, have you ever seen pictures of old school pilgrims?
M: Yeah, not hot pilgrims, real pilgrims. With that turkey neck thing flapping around, and I don't know why you're making turkey noises, but I can picture THAT. You having sex, no. But that I can picture.
*everyone breaks down laughing for about five minutes*
O: FUCK YOU! Shut the fuck up!
My boyfriend later referred to this conversation, and was all sad and confused as to how i knew about it, ha...He was the O in this conversation.
-
My boyfriend later referred to this conversation, and was all sad and confused as to how i knew about it, ha...He was the O in this conversation.
Haha, yeah. I knew right when it happened it was going on this thread, but none of them frequent BG, so I figured at best you'd find it hilarious.
-
:lol
-
My boyfriend later referred to this conversation, and was all sad and confused as to how i knew about it, ha...He was the O in this conversation.
As long as you're not the M in there.
"M- I can't picture you having sex
O- But... last night..."
-
My boyfriend later referred to this conversation, and was all sad and confused as to how i knew about it, ha...He was the O in this conversation.
As long as you're not the M in there.
"M- I can't picture you having sex
O- But... last night..."
Plus Fucking One
-
http://jp.youtube.com/watch?v=vlAKnSCRWQM
Now if only that was how the race was going to be decided.
-
http://xkcd.com/231/ (http://xkcd.com/231/)
My friend sent this to me saying only this: "This is YOU."
Ohhhhh kitties...
-
How does Beaker feel about your fondness for his feline nemeses? :smirk
-
If you saw an amputee being hanged, would it be considered "un-PC" to star calling out random letters?
-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9tpsHzO1siw&feature=related
-
This email:
Crusader of Logic wrote:
> Troll squad has came out of the woodworks to give me more issues.
> Therefore, smiting is required. Refrain from attacking or get burned.
Hey Crusader of Logic, this isn't a battle, nor is it a campaign.
There's no smiting (though there are warnings and timeouts, but those
are given out by Paizo staff, not you).
I think you might be better off if you backed off a bit with the
aggressive language since it's clearly rubbing people the wrong way.
And probably making them less likely to give your ideas serious
credence. I'm pretty sure that's not what you want.
-
http://www.vgcats.com/comics/?strip_id=273
That was... morbid.
-
It's VGCats, uber. That's the whole point. :D
"MY BALLS ARE A RIVER OF BLOOOOOOD!!"
-
"Food is not that big!"
I'll let AC explain, as I'm at work :-\
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"Food is not that big!"
I'll let AC explain, as I'm at work :-\
So Shewolf, her boyfriend (The letter O from my last story), and I were hanging outside Steak N Shake last night when a truck drives by with a giant bowl-like-wok device in the bed of the truck.
Me: What the fuck is that?
Shewolf: A giant wok.
O: No, it's not. It's *insert spanish word that I forgot*. They use it to cook payaya.
Shewolf: Yes it is. It's a giant wok. It has to be decorative, too.
O: No, they use it to cook for parties.
Shewolf: FOOD IS NOT THAT BIG!
*five minutes later*
Shewolf: See the thing about my catfolk was FOOD IS NOT THAT BIG!
-
I still cannot get my head around it, that freaking paella pan was so big, it wouldn't fit in the bed of the truck!
O and I were still arguing about it later that night, I don't care how much food you're making, having a pan larger than a truck does not make cooking any more convenient. You cant put a heat source large enough under that thing!
-
You haven't seen a hangi, then... They feed entire tribes...
-
I could totally see a pan that big used for cooking. Heck, the flattop at my restaurant is a good 6'x3'. Easily heated. Something like that just needs a propane flame under it spread out so it doesn't heat one spot to near melting temperatures, but heats most of the bottom. Now, moving the food in it would be a problem. You'll probably fill it 1/3-1/2 full of food at a time, and moving it would be a problem, since tossing is out of the question. A flattop is different since it's, well, flat, so you just use spatulas to move the food.
Anyways, something that made me lol: on Friday somebody ordered a chuck burger with cheese. Not so bad, right? Well, he wanted three cheeses on it: swiss, cheddar, and american. Before the cheese melted, it was taller than the burger. And it was a medium burger too, so it was a thick one. It's about 3/4 cups of cheese on a half pound burger. Only in America...
-
:drool Cheese.
-
It was stacked about an inch and a half above the burger before melting. It was a sight to behold.
-
Me: What's your wolf's name?
Him: Aku (thick heavy accent)
Me: How do you spell that?
Him: A. Key. U.
Me: Key?
Him: K. Shut up!
-
Incidentally, that is the first name of Donald Duck in Finnish. Not sure why I had to mention that.
Anyway, I had a funny occasion on Sunday. I met a friend of mine when I was walking to the voting place, we had a cigarette, it was raining and we didn't know where the entrance was. So we leaned to the wall for a while and then my friend, who normally isn't that good a word-juggler said something that had me laughing for minutes.
Him: "You know, when you and me left the army I kind of thought I wouldn't encounter this shit again."
Me: "What shit would that be?"
Him: "Here we are, it's dark, it's raining, I am all wet and I have no fucking glue where to go."
-
Him: "Here we are, it's dark, it's raining, I am all wet and I have no fucking glue where to go."
:lol
Indeed, that's the army.
-
Anything made by Don Hertzfeldt.
"My anus is bleeding!" :lmao
-
I'm a mother fucking Organ Grinder now. If that isn't an LOL worthy title, I dunno what is. :lmao
Interesting new smiley there on the speed bar. That too is LOL worthy. It also expresses said sentiments. :lmao
In conclusion... :lmao
-
I once had a sociology prof who asked us whether we felt depictions of sex or depictions of violence were more harmful to the fabric of society. For examples, he showed us a porn still with the appropriate 'naughty bits' obscured, and said "You can't send this unsolicited through the mail. It's a crime." Then he showed a picture of a child soldier in Africa with his head pretty well destroyed by a rifle round, and said "This is on the evening news. Which do you think is more harmful?"
Food for thought.
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I once had a sociology prof who asked us whether we felt depictions of sex or depictions of violence were more harmful to the fabric of society. For examples, he showed us a porn still with the appropriate 'naughty bits' obscured, and said "You can't send this unsolicited through the mail. It's a crime." Then he showed a picture of a child soldier in Africa with his head pretty well destroyed by a rifle round, and said "This is on the evening news. Which do you think is more harmful?"
Food for thought.
That's rich.
-
My girlfriend and I on a walk through a campus trail back 3 years ago.
We see a wombat-looking thing, a ridiculously obese groundhog probably fed on the delicious treats of urban discarded trash.
Her: "THAT. You're mine." and she runs. No, sprints after it.
Me: Watching as it escapes in to the bushes.
Her: "Damn that thing is fast. It was so fat and cute."
Me: "Did you have a plan for what you'd do if you actually caught it?"
Her: Pauses, then "You know, I didn't actually plan that far ahead."
-
It'd probably fuck her up, groundhogs are fucking mean.
-
My girlfriend and I on a walk through a campus trail back 3 years ago.
We see a wombat-looking thing, a ridiculously obese groundhog probably fed on the delicious treats of urban discarded trash.
Her: "THAT. You're mine." and she runs. No, sprints after it.
Me: Watching as it escapes in to the bushes.
Her: "Damn that thing is fast. It was so fat and cute."
Me: "Did you have a plan for what you'd do if you actually caught it?"
Her: Pauses, then "You know, I didn't actually plan that far ahead."
It was a Bidoof!
-
It LOOKED like a Bidoof (which I continually mistake for in place of her pronunciation of her recently captured "Budew" when she talks about her Pokemon: Diamond team)
But no, I doubt it would do anything other than squeal and flee. That fucker was fat and domesticated. I'll bet it would stick around if we had food.
A red squirrel in our inner harbor district took a peanut from my girlfriend's fingers a year ago. Birds kept snatching the thrown food, so after half an hour of pacing and fretting it decided to 'make the move'.
I threw a pokeball at it but failed.
-
That is definitely LOL worthy.
-
SW: It's a snow spider.
V: It's a snow pider!
AC: Snow pie?
O: Snow pirate?! ahhh!
-
I lol that I'm in the top 30 poster, by posts, by about 5 posts.
-
Where do you check those stats, by the by?
-
Click on the "MEMBERS" button (right next to LOGOUT).
On the far right, there's a Posts area.
If you click the word "Posts", it reorganizes the list to order the people with the most posts first.
-
... I'm in a fucking carmic position.
-
Gods...
Why did they EVER make a movie called ICE SPIDERS...
:wall :wall :wall :wall
-
http://miscellanea.wellingtongrey.net/2008/10/12/warning-in-case-of-terrorist-attack-do-not-discard-brain/
-
Time dubbed the US democracy to be the most succesful in the world. That gave me a good chuckle.
-
Well, our culture is pretty much steamrolling pretty much everything else in the world. We're like the Romans, except less violent and more hedonistic.
-
Well, our culture is pretty much steamrolling pretty much everything else in the world. We're like the Romans, except less violent and more hedonistic.
Less violent maybe. But then given that the typical American doesn't bat an eye at seeing some kid with his brains blown out but starts whining incessantly when some woman takes off her shirt (thereby exposing her breasts)... Epic Fail is Epic.
-
we have alot of catch up to do on the hedo part.. but im pulling my weight on this end...
-
Well, our culture is pretty much steamrolling pretty much everything else in the world. We're like the Romans, except less violent and more hedonistic.
Less violent maybe. But then given that the typical American doesn't bat an eye at seeing some kid with his brains blown out but starts whining incessantly when some woman takes off her shirt (thereby exposing her breasts)... Epic Fail is Epic.
American culture as a whole is really fucked up. But, defining the reaction of the "typical american" is nearly impossible because of the extreme ranges to which the entirety of our population is capable of going.
-
Well, our culture is pretty much steamrolling pretty much everything else in the world. We're like the Romans, except less violent and more hedonistic.
Less violent maybe. But then given that the typical American doesn't bat an eye at seeing some kid with his brains blown out but starts whining incessantly when some woman takes off her shirt (thereby exposing her breasts)... Epic Fail is Epic.
American culture as a whole is really fucked up. But, defining the reaction of the "typical american" is nearly impossible because of the extreme ranges to which the entirety of our population is capable of going.
Granted on both counts. Regardless, nudity evokes a far stronger reaction than violence in nearly all cases.
-
I'd daresay that's due to the fact that violence has been superexposed, whereas nudity has not.
Around here it's the opposite... boobs are fine, but violence gets a bigger reaction.
A Brazillian actor called Pedro Cardoso lashed out against our excessively gratuitous porn. He got attacked from nearly every angle later.
-
I'd daresay that's due to the fact that violence has been superexposed, whereas nudity has not.
Around here it's the opposite... boobs are fine, but violence gets a bigger reaction.
A Brazillian actor called Pedro Cardoso lashed out against our excessively gratuitous porn. He got attacked from nearly every angle later.
That could certainly be the case. I know it's not like that elsewhere in the world.
-
Courtesy of SDK, I found this hilarious...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P6P_sXbQtgc
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Well, our culture is pretty much steamrolling pretty much everything else in the world. We're like the Romans, except less violent and more hedonistic.
Does that make your democracy succesful? Was the ruling system of the USSR the second most succesful in the world in the 1960's?
-
We're like the Romans, except less violent and more hedonistic.
Violence-wise, I'd say it's about even, but when it comes to hedonism, not even close! We have yet to descend to the level of decadence where people visit vomitoriums just so they can eat more without having to stop due to being full.
-
j0lt, I disagree:
http://www.goldencorral.com/ (http://www.goldencorral.com/)
-
Furthermore, that's not actually what a vomitorium was. It was just the part of a coliseum through which the audience left. To "vomit" the crowds back onto the street, apparently.
-
Gods...
Why did they EVER make a movie called ICE SPIDERS...
:wall :wall :wall :wall
I got the joy of watching that film for review purposes.
Hour and a half I'll never get back.
-
Family Guy.
Yeah, I like that. Helps me sate my destructive impulses without lashing out at anyone.
Prom night dumpster baby FTW.
-
So we all know what today is, and all the servers wore costumes. Some weren't very exciting (a cat girl.....just a black shirt and pants (generic sweat-style) and cat ears and a tail....), but the three highlights: St. Pauli girl (I work in a bar....too bad she didn't have the bust for it), Joe the plumber, and Heath Ledger's Joker from the hospital scenes (complete with blond wig and everything!), this last one actually scared some kids.
-
the problem with the joker is it was too good in the original.. it was instantly old news..
i would feel better doing a purple joker suit..
-
You're going to see a lot of those out there...but the hospital scenes? I'm not so sure. Besides, he scared children. That alone.
Oh yeah, just remembered another one: construction worker wearing short jean shorts. Guy. There were two smurfs (the bartenders teamed up), a native american girl (not sure if she was going for anyone specific), a farm girl (you know, the stereotypical jean shorts and general sluttyness?), a mummy in a dress (not quite sure what the heck it was supposed to be....), and one more girl that I can't remember.
-
You're going to see a lot of those out there...but the hospital scenes? I'm not so sure. Besides, he scared children. That alone.
It's been done at an anime event I have been to this October.
-
But not a lot of times, I bet the purple jacket version will be more popular.
-
I'm just sayin', it's been done. :D
-
I find this to be quite amusing.... (http://forums.gleemax.com/showthread.php?t=1107373)
-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l7tEtWUfUkY (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l7tEtWUfUkY)
Just... Wow.
-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l7tEtWUfUkY (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l7tEtWUfUkY)
Just... Wow.
wtf :-\
-
It's nothing compared to this...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BNZzJELbFRI
-
edit: I love how the quote broke :(
That and I apparently had this thread open for a month? wtf?
-
It's nothing compared to this...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BNZzJELbFRI
:love :love :love
-
On a similar wtf note
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9mW_Se9W7hA
-
It has a lot of fail, but I did laugh anyway... (http://forums.gleemax.com/showthread.php?t=1049217)
-
http://apina.nwpshost.com/3288.gif (http://apina.nwpshost.com/3288.gif)
My friend posted that on my Facebook wall. I thought it was funny/cute.
-
Hahahahaha! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c3gMELlrO3E&feature=related)
-
:love Carlin
-
That there just nails it.
-
http://splodetv.com/angry-afganistan-wasp-swarm
I shouldnt laugh at this...
-
Squick. Thanks, bhu.
-
Engrish.
-
Can we nip that in the bud and confine that to the other threads? I'd rather not have this thread deteriorate.
-
The Count gets a lil naughty (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hUeN6LZNPVQ)
And so does Ariel (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=K4b7o4CJDdw)
Somehow this song got LESS filthy with the changes... (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oC6JDH_S7jE&feature=related)
Speaking of Ferrets and Little Mermaid... (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fcbazH6aE2g&feature=related)
-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dy4POAN9_EE&feature=related (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dy4POAN9_EE&feature=related) Sorry, was I out of character, George?
-
On a similar wtf note
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9mW_Se9W7hA
I sense much win in you.
-
Benny Hill skit music. While imagining some inept melee trying to chase a caster around to full attack them, while said caster happily kills everyone else. Now imagine said inept melee doing the same to a Marilith.
Paizils = comedic gold.
-
GavraelDragon (9:02:02 PM): ...not sure if I've shown you this or not.
GavraelDragon (9:02:11 PM): http://www.enworld.org/Inzeladun/conan/Conan40.htm
::Friend's name deleted for privacy:: (9:02:29 PM): ...you haven't. ::chokes to death::
GavraelDragon (9:02:31 PM): At what point does "This. Is. Nothing. Like. Conan." need to be beaten into his head with a mace, as opposed to us laughing?
:: Deleted :: (9:02:40 PM): Where the fuck do they -get- this stuff?
GavraelDragon (9:02:47 PM): I don't know.
GavraelDragon (9:02:51 PM): Look at his Languages, too.
GavraelDragon (9:02:55 PM): Dwarven?!?!?!!?
:: Deleted ::(9:03:02 PM): ...Elven?
:: Deleted :: (9:03:09 PM): Okay. Just completely ignore this.
GavraelDragon (9:03:12 PM): I know.
GavraelDragon (9:03:22 PM): This is Conan in a sense almost as serious as I am.
:: Deleted :: (9:03:24 PM): Seriously, that is Epic Fail.
GavraelDragon (9:03:30 PM): Pun intended or not?
:: Deleted :: (9:03:35 PM): ...not.
The punny line as well as the sheet itself.
-
This here lol:
(http://failblog.files.wordpress.com/2008/10/fail-owned-newspaper-soggy-golf-hole-fail.jpg)
And this one, courtesy of the venerable Frank Trollman:
(http://www.robotpanic.com/images/girlscorpses1.jpg)
-
For fuck's sakes, please tell me that shit's a photoshop fake, or else you might have just killed my libido for five minutes...
-
For fuck's sakes, please tell me that shit's a photoshop fake, or else you might have just killed my libido for five minutes...
Oh, it is good to be back in business... :D
-
This is the part where I link the thread to itself as of 2 posts above this one. :P
-
So today at work I was making the cheeseburger potato soup, and I needed ground pepper and powdered garlic. We get our pepper and garlic for this sort of thing (all BoH stuff) in a close to gallon tub with a...4 inch or so screw on plastic cap. It's a pretty strong plastic, but can be bent easily. It doesn't break really though, so it's quite durable. We were out of garlic and pepper upstairs so I had to open a new one up. I start off trying to open the pepper. It doesn't budge. So I open the garlic first. It came off fairly easily (I had to use about 75% of my grip strength to open it). The pepper...it took us (me AND four other guys) about 10 minutes to open the pepper. It took two of us at once to open it. I swear they glued the freaking thing.
-
Wait a sec - cheeseburger potato SOUP? Am I the only one missing something here? What the hell is that, a soup made with cheeseburgers?
-
More or less. It's quite tasty, honestly. Kind of like baked potato soup with beef in it.
-
For fuck's sakes, please tell me that shit's a photoshop fake, or else you might have just killed my libido for five minutes...
Nope. The local comic shops stock that magazine
-
Wait a sec - cheeseburger potato SOUP? Am I the only one missing something here? What the hell is that, a soup made with cheeseburgers?
Basically. It is good. When I make it at least. It does taste kinda like a cheeseburger, a good one, not a fast food one. But mostly it's more like cheesy potato and hamburger stew. Doesn't have the texture of a burger ;)
EDIT: All of the soups we make in house are pretty good. Except maybe chicken tortilla, but that's mainly because it's just weird. Broccoli cheese is really good when I make it, the chili is amazingly awesome, potato bacon is pretty good, chicken tortilla is decent (it's...odd...depends on your tastes I guess, it's one of our big sellers), czbrgr potato is good, and I'm missing one, whichever one we make on Wednesday.
-
Wait a sec - cheeseburger potato SOUP? Am I the only one missing something here? What the hell is that, a soup made with cheeseburgers?
Basically. It is good. When I make it at least. It does taste kinda like a cheeseburger, a good one, not a fast food one. But mostly it's more like cheesy potato and hamburger stew. Doesn't have the texture of a burger ;)
EDIT: All of the soups we make in house are pretty good. Except maybe chicken tortilla, but that's mainly because it's just weird. Broccoli cheese is really good when I make it, the chili is amazingly awesome, potato bacon is pretty good, chicken tortilla is decent (it's...odd...depends on your tastes I guess, it's one of our big sellers), czbrgr potato is good, and I'm missing one, whichever one we make on Wednesday.
Damn, you ass, now I'm hungry and have to go find Japanese kids to eat.
-
So the other day, I went into work early, and my boss informs me that there is a coffee waiting for me at the Algerian cafe/hookah bar next door. I was told today that when she ordered and paid for it for me, she asked for 'whatever it is that shewolf gets'. Well they didn't know me by name, so the next thing she says is 'uhm, long hair, big boobs'
Well, the man behind the counter sure as hell knew who she was referring to, but not without blushing all over and being unable to make eye contact from then on...
Apparently this is how my boss describes me to random third parties. :-[
-
Wait a sec - cheeseburger potato SOUP? Am I the only one missing something here? What the hell is that, a soup made with cheeseburgers?
Basically. It is good. When I make it at least. It does taste kinda like a cheeseburger, a good one, not a fast food one. But mostly it's more like cheesy potato and hamburger stew. Doesn't have the texture of a burger ;)
EDIT: All of the soups we make in house are pretty good. Except maybe chicken tortilla, but that's mainly because it's just weird. Broccoli cheese is really good when I make it, the chili is amazingly awesome, potato bacon is pretty good, chicken tortilla is decent (it's...odd...depends on your tastes I guess, it's one of our big sellers), czbrgr potato is good, and I'm missing one, whichever one we make on Wednesday.
Damn, you ass, now I'm hungry and have to go find Japanese kids to eat.
No kidding! That chicken tortilla sounds damn good!
So the other day, I went into work early, and my boss informs me that there is a coffee waiting for me at the Algerian cafe/hookah bar next door. I was told today that when she ordered and paid for it for me, she asked for 'whatever it is that shewolf gets'. Well they didn't know me by name, so the next thing she says is 'uhm, long hair, big boobs'
Well, the man behind the counter sure as hell knew who she was referring to, but not without blushing all over and being unable to make eye contact from then on...
Apparently this is how my boss describes me to random third parties. :-[
And where do you say you live again? ;)
-
So the other day, I went into work early, and my boss informs me that there is a coffee waiting for me at the Algerian cafe/hookah bar next door. I was told today that when she ordered and paid for it for me, she asked for 'whatever it is that shewolf gets'. Well they didn't know me by name, so the next thing she says is 'uhm, long hair, big boobs'
Well, the man behind the counter sure as hell knew who she was referring to, but not without blushing all over and being unable to make eye contact from then on...
Apparently this is how my boss describes me to random third parties. :-[
There are worse things he could say, but yeah that is kinda messed up...
-
Her boss is female. Which, I think, makes it better. :D
-
Her boss is female. Which, I think, makes it better. :D
Plus Fucking One. You would like that, wouldn't you? :evillaugh
-
http://pkmndevil.ytmnd.com/ (http://pkmndevil.ytmnd.com/)
-
pics or it didnt happen ;)
-
Pictures of me do not exist on the internet... Unless BIMR didn't delete those pictures... ???
-
:evillaugh :drool
-
Did she? :eh
-
Man, I suppose now is a good time to mention the rule at my store that says I'm never allowed to take my shirt off...or else the room will fill with breasts and we will all suffocate. :D
-
Man, I suppose now is a good time to mention the rule at my store that says I'm never allowed to take my shirt off...or else the room will fill with breasts and we will all suffocate. :D
Gosh, that'd be horrible. Please don't throw me in that briar patch! :lol
I believe this is also the point where I'm supposed to say:
Pics or it didn't happen :P
-
Of all the ways to die, suffocation by giant breasts is nowhere near the worst.
-
Of all the ways to die, suffocation by giant breasts is nowhere near the worst.
And very close to the best. ;)
-
There has been much clamoring to repeal that rule ;)
-
Wait a sec - cheeseburger potato SOUP? Am I the only one missing something here? What the hell is that, a soup made with cheeseburgers?
Basically. It is good. When I make it at least. It does taste kinda like a cheeseburger, a good one, not a fast food one. But mostly it's more like cheesy potato and hamburger stew. Doesn't have the texture of a burger ;)
EDIT: All of the soups we make in house are pretty good. Except maybe chicken tortilla, but that's mainly because it's just weird. Broccoli cheese is really good when I make it, the chili is amazingly awesome, potato bacon is pretty good, chicken tortilla is decent (it's...odd...depends on your tastes I guess, it's one of our big sellers), czbrgr potato is good, and I'm missing one, whichever one we make on Wednesday.
I remembered the last soup! Chicken and wild rice. I'll probably not make that one, chicken tortilla, or potato bacon for a looooooooooooooooooong time because there's already a dedicated monday-thursday opener that makes soups. At least not until next semester when one of the openers might get a schedule change.
EDIT: So I'm not completely off-topic: http://www.girlgeniusonline.com/comic.php last panel.
-
Of all the ways to die, suffocation by giant breasts is nowhere near the worst.
And very close to the best. ;)
Are you kidding? I can think of no worse hell than dying of asphyxiation.
-
Of all the ways to die, suffocation by giant breasts is nowhere near the worst.
And very close to the best. ;)
Are you kidding? I can think of no worse hell than dying of asphyxiation.
While suffocation would indeed suck, I'd rank being ripped apart by an angry bear well above that!
-
What about by a happy bear? Or a morose, depressed bear? :lmao
And more on topic, being able to "twist" people's statements to say silly things like that is funny to me. No actual answers are desired (other than to hear what the response is), but it is fun to do.
-
Of all the ways to die, suffocation by giant breasts is nowhere near the worst.
And very close to the best. ;)
Are you kidding? I can think of no worse hell than dying of asphyxiation.
While suffocation would indeed suck, I'd rank being ripped apart by an angry bear well above that!
I'm giving myself 1 to 8 odds that I'd actually rip the bear apart. I don't think I could survive asphyxiation.
-
I'm giving myself 1 to 8 odds that I'd actually rip the bear apart. I don't think I could survive asphyxiation.
Going for the 'nads doesn't count.
-
Ripped apart by hot vagina.
-
:o
-
*clears throat*
This (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c3_95F5e-Ac).
-
I raise you this. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xH7kKnHpgus&feature=related)
-
I see your video, and raise you one more. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8wHMaJ6AtNs)
-
This had me rolling far more than any of their videos. (http://www.theonion.com/content/news/kobe_bryant_scores_25_in_holy_shit)
-
Of all the ways to die, suffocation by giant breasts is nowhere near the worst.
And very close to the best. ;)
Are you kidding? I can think of no worse hell than dying of asphyxiation.
While suffocation would indeed suck, I'd rank being ripped apart by an angry bear well above that!
Or being burned to death (not dying of smoke inhalation). I think dying of a painful cancer after a long fight against it looks the worst, though.
-
The new proxy the school is looking to adopt.
(http://img80.imageshack.us/img80/4803/bgek1.jpg)
-
Could have something to do with the recent influx of spam the boards have been getting.
-
:lol Who's been telling his fellow Turks to go blow goats for milk money at BG? :lol
-
:lmao Turkish bad words...
Anyway! I found this video highly amusing. It's a typical cockatiel behavior, and typical lazy/annoyed kitty behavior. Made me ROFL, in fact. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tuc2WmTpsTM&feature=related (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tuc2WmTpsTM&feature=related)
-
Thing that made me LOL: the comments to BobismyRhino's video
-
...yeah those... those are pretty lol worthy... in a /b tard sort of way.
-
:lol Who's been telling his fellow Turks to go blow goats for milk money at BG? :lol
Evidently some Turkish warmages. I hear they blow goats quite frequently. (Cookie for the reference.)
-
Evidently some Turkish warmages. I hear they blow goats quite frequently. (Cookie for the reference.)
Warmages blow Turkish goats for milk money.
-
Evidently some Turkish warmages. I hear they blow goats quite frequently. (Cookie for the reference.)
Warmages blow Turkish goats for milk money.
Really? Sunic said it was pocket change.
-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DpA2tMrQ4RU&feature=related (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DpA2tMrQ4RU&feature=related) Kitteh
-
Really? Sunic said it was pocket change.
Isn't that what milk money is? ???
-
Evidently some Turkish warmages. I hear they blow goats quite frequently. (Cookie for the reference.)
Warmages blow Turkish goats for milk money.
Really? Sunic said it was pocket change.
Actually, 'twas LogicNinja, IIRC.
-
Actually, 'twas LogicNinja, IIRC.
Well, then, Sunic quotes him a lot. Not that surprising, really.
-
clicky (http://graphjam.com/2008/10/16/song-chart-memes-posts-on-a-message-board/)
-
clicky (http://graphjam.com/2008/10/16/song-chart-memes-posts-on-a-message-board/)
Win.
-
Because being evil rocks. Or Disneys. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fcbazH6aE2g)
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Because being evil rocks. Or Disneys. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fcbazH6aE2g)
Swear I linked that one earlier...
-
:lmao Turkish bad words...
Anyway! I found this video highly amusing. It's a typical cockatiel behavior, and typical lazy/annoyed kitty behavior. Made me ROFL, in fact. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tuc2WmTpsTM&feature=related (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tuc2WmTpsTM&feature=related)
http://www.secondose.com/wp-content/uploads/2008/10/lovestory.jpg
seen these?
-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mhqaeb_hObY
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Not really quoting him a lot. I just found that thread title hilarious, and remembered it for the rolling eyes barfing smiley that got posted because someone jokingly mentioned cantrips.
I don't even know the guy that well.
-
Swear I linked that one earlier...
Well it deserves being linked twice!
-
http://brilliantgameologists.com/boards/index.php?topic=2685.0 (http://brilliantgameologists.com/boards/index.php?topic=2685.0)
-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qRuNxHqwazs
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t-3qncy5Qfk&feature=related
The original, and the sequel.
-
i would like to win at arson... i already frequently win at irony..
-
[spoiler](http://i222.photobucket.com/albums/dd54/Prime32_temp/Other/motivator4267997.jpg)[/spoiler]
-
...Who the FUCK is THAT?
-
...Who the FUCK is THAT?
It's Kamina (sp?), from Tengen Toppa Gurren Lagann... I know the name, but that's it...
-
WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK HE IS?!! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6V2CRnsZf_8) (http://img300.imageshack.us/img300/5074/gar2fy5.gif)
-
Well, he's clearly not the goddamned Batman!
-
WHO THE HELL DO YOU THINK HE IS?!! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6V2CRnsZf_8) (http://img300.imageshack.us/img300/5074/gar2fy5.gif)
I am suddenly reminded of Laharl. Cookie if you get the reference.
-
I am suddenly reminded of Laharl. Cookie if you get the reference.
I recall the game and the character, but not the specific situation.
"Oh CRAP! He has a HORSE WEINER!"
-
Well, he's clearly not the goddamned Batman!
Win.
-
I am suddenly reminded of Laharl. Cookie if you get the reference.
I recall the game and the character, but not the specific situation.
"Oh CRAP! He has a HORSE WEINER!"
He sometimes freaks out and makes that face, then starts yelling at people.
Cookie for you.
-
He sometimes freaks out and makes that face, then starts yelling at people.
Cookie for you.
It's not poisonous, is it?
-
I am suddenly reminded of Laharl. Cookie if you get the reference.
I recall the game and the character, but not the specific situation.
"Oh CRAP! He has a HORSE WEINER!"
That sounds like my last date.
-
He sometimes freaks out and makes that face, then starts yelling at people.
Cookie for you.
It's not poisonous, is it?
Sense Motive DC 72. "No."
-
Sense Motive DC 72. "No."
Sarcasm lowers the DC by 40. Made it.
REALLY now?
-
Sense Motive DC 72. "No."
Sarcasm lowers the DC by 40. Made it.
REALLY now?
Why do you think it's only 72? :P
-
This little icon :police: reminded me of what happened in class the other day.
While I'm sitting in my sociology class, playing on my computer and paying barely any attention to this group that was presenting about social norms... they start talking about a picture. In this picture, there is a fully dressed policeman (the norm) and a stripper who's partially dressed like a policeman (the deviant). I glance up, take note of deviant's hotness, and then go back to my computer while listening to the presentation. The presenter then goes on to make a little joke: "As you can see, no one would really listen to the guy on the right (the deviant) because of the way he's dressed."
And of coures I blurt out, "I would." I wasn't really paying attention, and I thought I had said that under my breath... but the entire class turned around and started laughing. I looked over at my co-worker, and his face was red and just buried in his hands. It was pretty embarrassing, but also pretty funny at the same time.
-
Bob, do you have any Brazillian clones I could borrom? :P
-
http://www.quagmire-it.com/
-
http://www.quagmire-it.com/
:lol The BG boards became funnier.
-
http://poststuff4.entensity.net/111408/flash.php?media=mirrorcat.flv (http://poststuff4.entensity.net/111408/flash.php?media=mirrorcat.flv) [kitteh]
-
http://poststuff4.entensity.net/111408/flash.php?media=mirrorcat.flv (http://poststuff4.entensity.net/111408/flash.php?media=mirrorcat.flv) [kitteh]
That's funny and sad at the same time. Poor kitty hit that thing hard... but it WAS pretty funny.
Oh, and Kuro: I've had long, meaningful conversations about cloning myself... It just wouldn't work. If there were more of me, me and the clones would get jealous of one other and the world would be torn apart by angry BIMRs trying to sabotage and assasinate one another.
To summarize: The world is not large enough for more than one of me. :laugh:
-
To summarize: The world is not large enough for more than one of me.
James Bond family motto or crack about weight? Your choice.
Also, I lol pretty hard at Narutards. Both out of pity and out of how pathetic they are.
-
Can we get the DC of a 0th level spell's saving throw over 100? Because if we can, may I present:
The navi bomb.
Ingredients: 400 magical traps of message crafted by your deity. If they allowed saving throws, it would be over 100. Dispater has +99 total bonus to concentration. Statistically, he is going to fail at least one concentration check, and have his casting interrupted
The message? "Hey, Listen".
This can be varied for some sort of LE god of spam.
-
This sounds seriously like one of those Iron Siege shenanigans.
-
I'm SO using it if I ever work up the willpower to get back into that. Gotta find some way to combine it with Dancing Lights.
-
This sounds seriously like one of those Iron Siege shenanigans.
Whatever happened to that, anyway? Seems like it just stopped.
-
This sounds seriously like one of those Iron Siege shenanigans.
Whatever happened to that, anyway? Seems like it just stopped.
Carnivore has not contacted me about his challengers, but it lives on at WotC bringing me more and more ever more difficult challengers.
-
Mister Sinister introduced this site to me: http://notalwaysright.com/ (http://notalwaysright.com/) I've been LOLing for a steady half hour now. :laugh:
Also, my friend had this in her LJ and I nearly fell out of my seat laughing at it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W-qJaow1Kf0 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W-qJaow1Kf0)
You really only need to see the last 30 seconds of the vid...
-
(http://img395.imageshack.us/img395/2138/1220832247266wh6.jpg)
-
(http://img.ircimages.com/ircimages/2/5/252073d836d57e3d8408e0f853c0e8d4.jpg)
-
(http://img.ircimages.com/ircimages/2/5/252073d836d57e3d8408e0f853c0e8d4.jpg)
Baaaaaaaaad.
-
What's the name of that animal in English anyway?
-
A failbird?
-
A failbird?
The upper one, I recognized the failbird.
-
A failbird?
The upper one, I recognized the failbird.
Half breeds?
-
Between?
-
A platypus and a chimp?
-
Nosemonkey seems to be the real name, not that difficult to translate from Finnish... Nenäapina sounds just like nosemonkey, eh?
-
I fail to see the Failbird.
-
I had to quote him and then copy the link from his post, if that helps.
-
Chart Comedian (http://www.metacafe.com/watch/yt-VEa9LYAayrk/demetri_martin_flip_chart_offiical_video/?cd=321d9a0df47d782ca7c019578e98e5fd005yt-4ZmyH4DSxIIusa)
First time I saw him, I was in stiches.
-
How'd he manage to make the link invisible, by the by?
-
It just tells me that I don't have permission to look at the pic.
-
http://forums.gleemax.com/showthread.php?t=1115031 (http://forums.gleemax.com/showthread.php?t=1115031)metathread lulz.
-
http://forums.gleemax.com/showthread.php?t=1115031metathread lulz.
It's all true, and yet I cannot laugh.
-
Win :P
-
i just cant read 9 pages of that.
-
Lols.
-
(Enters to proclaim InnaBinder wins an "INT3RN3T$" for posting a link to that thread.)
Alright, I'm done. lol
-
http://forums.gleemax.com/showthread.php?t=1115031 (http://forums.gleemax.com/showthread.php?t=1115031)metathread lulz.
Dude, that's the best thread on the internet.
I especially loved (insert link to cheeseburger porn). :lmao
i just cant read 9 pages of that.
Then I must ask if you make it through any threads involving ubernoob or sunic flames? :smirk
-
And just what is that supposed to mean?
[spoiler=Don't read this.]Ready action Life and Death SDA if the answer is displeasing.[/spoiler]
-
just one or two..
-
i just cant read 9 pages of that.
Then I must ask if you make it through any threads involving ubernoob or sunic flames? :smirk
On average aren't my posts pretty short and straight forward though?
-
ya, but every now and then you get windy.. like me..
-
i just cant read 9 pages of that.
Then I must ask if you make it through any threads involving ubernoob or sunic flames? :smirk
On average aren't my posts pretty short and straight forward though?
Yeah, but they often consist of things similiar to what is in that thread. :p
-
ya, but every now and then you get windy.. like me..
Fair 'nuff. Comes with the Terr (http://www.typelogic.com/intj.html)itory (http://www.personalitypage.com/ENTJ.html).
-
I see what you did there
-
A little help, guys? (http://helpavirgin.com/)
-
if the interwebs cant get someone laid, then the only option left is based on cash.
-
if the interwebs cant get someone laid, then the only option left is based on cash.
But the interwebs are based on cash!
So if the interwebs can't get someone laid... nothing can!
-
This depresses me immensely (http://www.cracked.com/article_15753_8-celebrities-you-didnt-know-were-geeks.html).
And yet, I feel confident that it belongs here.
-
Sweet merciful crap! Coordinators!
-
Lego safe (http://www.slipperybrick.com/2008/11/legos-safe/)
-
Then I must ask if you make it through any threads involving ubernoob or sunic flames? :smirk
Wait... people read those?
-
Mister Sinister introduced this site to me: http://notalwaysright.com/ (http://notalwaysright.com/) I've been LOLing for a steady half hour now. :laugh:
Customer: “Look! My friend told me I could get this type of hammer at your store! Now go get it for me!”
Cashier: “Sir, I already told you… we don’t have ANY hammers back here that aren’t already stocked on the shelves.”
Customer: “LOOK HERE. F**K YOU! I KNOW YOU’RE TRYING TO SAVE MONEY BY SWITCHING OUT YOUR STOCKS! GET ME THIS HAMMER!”
(At this point, I come to the front of the store, overhearing what’s going on; note that I’m the manager.)
Me: “Is there a problem?”
Customer: “Yes sir! Your employee here is not doing what I tell her to!”
Me: “Well, you need to calm down and understand that we don’t have what you’re looking for. So maybe you should go back to shelves and check–”
Customer: “F**K THAT!!! IT’S NOT THERE, OKAY?! YOU NEED TO F**KING GET ME WHAT I ASK FOR!”
Me: “That’s it. Get out of my store.”
Customer: “What? NO!”
Me: “Sir, get out, or I have to take you out.”
Customer: “Then do it!”
(I go around the counter and approach the customer. I yank him by his collar & drag him to the door.)
Me: “Now, then… you wanna apologize and maybe come back in?”
Customer: “No! I just want my hammer! God, what is this madness?!”
Me: *puts the customer down*
Customer: *confused* “… What is it?”
(I turn back to the cashier, who nods in approval. I then turn back to face the customer.)
Me: “Madness? THIS! IS! SPARTAAAAAAAAA!” *kicks customer out of store and slams door*
I demand to know what hardware store this is, because I swear to got that's the best fucking hardware store ever. :lmao
-
Epic Win is Epic.
Also... *calls down divine thunder on Bob* Show some respect. Or else. :evillaugh
-
*shields Bob with a lightning rod*
Respect must be earned, not forced.
-
It's not being forced, just... encouraged. *watches the lightning rod get overloaded and explode with predictably fatal results for Kuro, then uses it again because it's an at will smite*
-
*licks lightning* Ooooooooooh, tingly! :p
-
It's not being forced, just... encouraged. *watches the lightning rod get overloaded and explode with predictably fatal results for Kuro, then uses it again because it's an at will smite*
*watches as the lightning curves around him* You forget, dude, I'm the reincarnation of Murphy's law - and it doesn't affect me.
-
Mister Sinister introduced this site to me: http://notalwaysright.com/ (http://notalwaysright.com/) I've been LOLing for a steady half hour now. :laugh:
I'm on page 57. :lmao
-
It's not being forced, just... encouraged. *watches the lightning rod get overloaded and explode with predictably fatal results for Kuro, then uses it again because it's an at will smite*
*watches as the lightning curves around him* You forget, dude, I'm the reincarnation of Murphy's law - and it doesn't affect me.
Rank check, fucker. :D
-
Sunic, when the hell did you become Zeus? :lmao
-
Sunic, when the hell did you become Zeus? :lmao
Since I developed shapeshifting hax. Would you prefer your smites in divine fire? :evillaugh
-
Rank check, fucker.
I pass.
-
Rank check, fucker.
I pass.
Lies!
-
Sunic, when the hell did you become Zeus? :lmao
Since I developed shapeshifting hax. Would you prefer your smites in divine fire? :evillaugh
Oh sunic! You know just how to smite a girl! :love
-
Sunic, when the hell did you become Zeus? :lmao
Since I developed shapeshifting hax. Would you prefer your smites in divine fire? :evillaugh
Oh sunic! You know just how to smite a girl! :love
And this is why chivalry said "Fuck this!" and took a walk.
-
:blush Chivalry makes me blush. It's bittersweet for me.
I love it, but at the same time, I hate not having control over my emotions... And chivalry definitely makes my heart melt. :bigeye
-
:blush Chivalry makes me blush. It's bittersweet for me.
I love it, but at the same time, I hate not having control over my emotions... And chivalry definitely makes my heart melt. :bigeye
Good to know. Good to know. Watch out AC.
-
Mister Sinister introduced this site to me: http://notalwaysright.com/ (http://notalwaysright.com/) I've been LOLing for a steady half hour now. :laugh:
I'm on page 57. :lmao
Which quote?
-
Sunic, when the hell did you become Zeus? :lmao
Since I developed shapeshifting hax. Would you prefer your smites in divine fire? :evillaugh
Oh sunic! You know just how to smite a girl! :love
Damn right. Now put this on. *offers a thick leather collar*
We're going for a walk.
Also, what McPoyo said.
-
(I’m tending to the cats at our pet store when a young woman comes up and points at a small tabby, Velma.)
Me: “Ah, would you like to see Velma? She’s a little shy but very sweet.”
Customer: “I can has cat?”
Me: “Um… if you are interested in adopting, I’ll be happy to get out Velma or any of the cats so that you can get to know them a little better.”
Customer: “I can has lolcat?”
Me: “…”
Customer: “She is in her playpen, stealin our funs!”
Me: “You know, pets can be a big responsibility, and I’m not sure a cat would be the best thing for you right now.”
Customer: “K thanks bye!” *turns and walks out of the store*
Me, to Velma: “I think I may have just saved your life.”
-
:blush Chivalry makes me blush. It's bittersweet for me.
I love it, but at the same time, I hate not having control over my emotions... And chivalry definitely makes my heart melt. :bigeye
*bows and offers a rose*
-
Me: “Okay, and if you could just sign the top line of this receipt copy for the return, you’ll be all set.”
Customer: “Wait, this isn’t my correct address. This address printed on this receipt is not mine.”
Me: “Yes ma’am, I realize that. However, our cash registers make us enter address and telephone information whenever anyone does a return or exchange. It’s for fraud prevention, etc. However, whenever I request a customer’s address, they panic, clutch their purse to their chest and hiss, ‘Why would you need to know that?’ Or they shout, ‘I’m not getting on any more god damn mailing lists!’ or they are conspiracy theorists who are convinced that I’m an agent of the government monitoring their spending habits through my DOS-based cash register. Or they think I want to come and hang out with them after I get off work. And it really doesn’t matter how many times I try to explain that it’s a fraud prevention requirement and that I’m neither immediately passing it on to Big Brother nor to my drug dealer named Tito. So I make up addresses because I don’t particularly want to have these conversations anymore.”
Customer, after a long pause: “Yes, that’s a very good plan you’ve come up with.” *scampers away from me*
Related:
:lmao
-
[spoiler=A conversation spawned this]
(http://i269.photobucket.com/albums/jj61/archerpwr/Empaths.jpg)[/spoiler]
-
Dinosaur Comics. As a plus, it's always relevant. Always. (http://www.qwantz.com)
-
Hahahahahahah. If only any of you knew her in real life, you'd be laughing as much as I am right now.
-
[spoiler=A conversation spawned this]
(http://i269.photobucket.com/albums/jj61/archerpwr/Empaths.jpg)[/spoiler]
Mister Sinister (the character at least) is not an empath though, nor has he ever been in any Marvel continuum.
-
[spoiler=A conversation spawned this]
(http://i269.photobucket.com/albums/jj61/archerpwr/Empaths.jpg)[/spoiler]
Mister Sinister (the character at least) is not an empath though, nor has he ever been in any Marvel continuum.
This is where I admit that I'm not a big comic fan buff.
-
[spoiler=A conversation spawned this]
(http://i269.photobucket.com/albums/jj61/archerpwr/Empaths.jpg)[/spoiler]
Mister Sinister (the character at least) is not an empath though, nor has he ever been in any Marvel continuum.
See, I read that more as MS saying the line. Makes it more amusing, especially with the evil overlord pose he's in.
-
[spoiler=A conversation spawned this]
(http://i269.photobucket.com/albums/jj61/archerpwr/Empaths.jpg)[/spoiler]
Mister Sinister (the character at least) is not an empath though, nor has he ever been in any Marvel continuum.
This is where I admit that I'm not a big comic fan buff.
He has regeneration, energy blasts, total molecular control over his body and telekinesis. He is also one of the leading minds of human biology and perhaps the best surgeon in the world.
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He has regeneration, energy blasts, total molecular control over his body and telekinesis. He is also one of the leading minds of human biology and perhaps the best surgeon in the world.
Title collector, much?
-
and dosnt care about those around him.. no empathy..
-
Hahahahahahah. If only any of you knew her in real life, you'd be laughing as much as I am right now.
:ahem
-
Hahahahahahah. If only any of you knew her in real life, you'd be laughing as much as I am right now.
:ahem
It's true, honey.
-
:lmao
-
Inside joke alert!
On the other hand, you call a bow and a rose Chivalry? You get that from the movies or something?
-
Inside joke alert!
On the other hand, you call a bow and a rose Chivalry? You get that from the movies or something?
Nope, that's just me being a hopeless romantic. Not that I stand much of a chance.
-
Hahahahahahah. If only any of you knew her in real life, you'd be laughing as much as I am right now.
:ahem
It's true, honey.
Et tu, Shewolf?
-
This wins the whole fucking Internets:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J2avdf289OY
-
Inside joke alert!
On the other hand, you call a bow and a rose Chivalry? You get that from the movies or something?
Nope, that's just me being a hopeless romantic. Not that I stand much of a chance.
Hehe, join the club, buddy *high five* :)
-
Inside joke alert!
On the other hand, you call a bow and a rose Chivalry? You get that from the movies or something?
Nope, that's just me being a hopeless romantic. Not that I stand much of a chance.
Hehe, join the club, buddy *high five* :)
My brand of chivalry involves being more daring than this, as well. Part of it involves not making a lovely lady have to choose between me and whoever she happens to be with at the moment.
After all, it'd be unfair to the other guy.
-
WTF? (http://www.futuramaff.com/showthread.php?t=4696)
-
WTF? (http://www.futuramaff.com/showthread.php?t=4696)
:lmao It's like /b went to Yahoo...
-
Shame he couldn't start with himself.
-
What the fuck indeed.
-
Inside joke alert!
On the other hand, you call a bow and a rose Chivalry? You get that from the movies or something?
Nope, that's just me being a hopeless romantic. Not that I stand much of a chance.
Hehe, join the club, buddy *high five* :)
My brand of chivalry involves being more daring than this, as well. Part of it involves not making a lovely lady have to choose between me and whoever she happens to be with at the moment.
After all, it'd be unfair to the other guy.
Psh, no fun in making her choose. Make the guy she's with choose: Guns or Blades. :P
-
Inside joke alert!
On the other hand, you call a bow and a rose Chivalry? You get that from the movies or something?
Nope, that's just me being a hopeless romantic. Not that I stand much of a chance.
Hehe, join the club, buddy *high five* :)
My brand of chivalry involves being more daring than this, as well. Part of it involves not making a lovely lady have to choose between me and whoever she happens to be with at the moment.
After all, it'd be unfair to the other guy.
Psh, no fun in making her choose. Make the guy she's with choose: Guns or Blades. :P
I have my duels with smiting, thankyouverymuch.
-
I have my duels with smiting, thankyouverymuch.
I believe that's called murder, and last time I checked, that wasn't very chivalrous. :p
-
Those are epic.
-
I have my duels with smiting, thankyouverymuch.
I believe that's called murder, and last time I checked, that wasn't very chivalrous. :p
You obviously haven't been paying much attention during the last 3 centuries or so, dear.
Allow me to present you some evidence.
(http://i197.photobucket.com/albums/aa185/moldyspore/motivational_bleach_chivalry_148.jpg)
-
You obviously haven't been paying much attention during the last 3 centuries or so, dear.
Regretfully, I was only born 23 years ago and history bores me.
I was arguing more about the whole smiting thing. Killing people in a duel I see as chivalrous, but smiting them? That's just unfair.
-
Which is why I said I have my duels with smiting.
AC is worth keeping alive, though.
-
Lols.
-
Mmh, seems smiting is standard 'dueling' procedure for a lot of people on the interwebz :P
-
Mmh, seems smiting is standard 'dueling' procedure for a lot of people on the interwebz :P
Indeed. Lot to be said about sudden bolts from a clear sky.
-
Mmh, seems smiting is standard 'dueling' procedure for a lot of people on the interwebz :P
Indeed. Lot to be said about sudden bolts from a clear sky.
On the plus side, I wouldn't be smiting AC for being an idiot, because... y'know... he's not.
On second thought, I probably respect him too much to steal his gal.
-
Tonight at Thanksgiving dinner, my mom got out this little box full of cards with random questions on them that are supposed to be conversation starters. They included questions like, "What's your favorite book and movie?" "What's your goal?" "What, to you, would be the perfect job?" etc, etc.
Well, my dad draws this one card that reads: If you got to meet God and were allowed to ask him one question, what would it be?
My dad answers: Am I going to Heaven? Because if not, I'm going to say screw it and be bad.
My mom answers: Why did you make me?
My sister-in-law answers: When will I die?
My brother answers: Did you really break the mold when you made me?
I answer: Do you watch me when I pee?
Yeah... It's funny and sad, because I so would actually ask that.
-
Thanks, kuro. ;)
-
So here's a true story I hope ya'll will get a giggle from.
AC, BimR, my boyfriend and I were all standing outside in the parking lot of my apartment complex. I saw a raccoon climb out of the dumpster and walk across the lot, so I throw my cigarette to the side and book it towards that raccoon, because chasing the local wildlife is fun and keeps us all on our toes :D
Meanwhile, to the rest of the group, I've sprinted out of sight for no apparent reason. One of them says "Oh shit, is it a full moon?!"
"I don't know! It's too cloudy!" They take refuge next to a hedge that surrounds the pool area of my apartment complex.
I've treed the raccoon, and lost interest in it. So I wander back to the parking lot, saying "where did everybody go?" I don't see them, so I start walking back to my apartment, passing the pool, where I see them across the patio. I go through the pool gate, not realizing they haven't seen me...
...And got to see all three of them jump out of their skins, with AC holding BimR as a meatsheild in front of him.
-
Tonight at Thanksgiving dinner, my mom got out this little box full of cards with random questions on them that are supposed to be conversation starters. They included questions like, "What's your favorite book and movie?" "What's your goal?" "What, to you, would be the perfect job?" etc, etc.
Well, my dad draws this one card that reads: If you got to meet God and were allowed to ask him one question, what would it be?
My dad answers: Am I going to Heaven? Because if not, I'm going to say screw it and be bad.
My mom answers: Why did you make me?
My sister-in-law answers: When will I die?
My brother answers: Did you really break the mold when you made me?
I answer: Do you watch me when I pee?
Yeah... It's funny and sad, because I so would actually ask that.
My answer: Now that you've made the morally worst creature in existence, what are you going to do with your life? Watching reruns of WW2 is bound to get old, you know.
-
So here's a true story I hope ya'll will get a giggle from.
AC, BimR, my boyfriend and I were all standing outside in the parking lot of my apartment complex. I saw a raccoon climb out of the dumpster and walk across the lot, so I throw my cigarette to the side and book it towards that raccoon, because chasing the local wildlife is fun and keeps us all on our toes :D
Meanwhile, to the rest of the group, I've sprinted out of sight for no apparent reason. One of them says "Oh shit, is it a full moon?!"
"I don't know! It's too cloudy!" They take refuge next to a hedge that surrounds the pool area of my apartment complex.
I've treed the raccoon, and lost interest in it. So I wander back to the parking lot, saying "where did everybody go?" I don't see them, so I start walking back to my apartment, passing the pool, where I see them across the patio. I go through the pool gate, not realizing they haven't seen me...
...And got to see all three of them jump out of their skins, with AC holding BimR as a meatsheild in front of him.
LOL I almost mauled AC for that. :lmao
But seriously, watching you fly after a small innocent creature has got to be the funniest/scariest thing ever.
Though, as soon as I lost sight of you I felt like I was Robert Muldoon from Jurassic Park: "Clever girl."
You were going to attack any second... and you did. After the raep that was had...which I had totally forgotten about and frankly, think I repressed it for a good reason.
-
Oh yeah, I remember there being mention of a BimR sandwich, which I did not witness.
-
You guys sound like you'd be so much fun to hang out with. Shame I live so far.
-
You guys sound like you'd be so much fun to hang out with. Shame I live so far.
/Signed.
Kuro, we should just like, optimize or way to the US >_> nothing fun happens around here. Besides, I'm sure they would love the company of 2 random SA people showing up with alcohol, snacks, and more alcohol. <3 Absinthe being legal here.
-
Can't rape the willing. :lmao
-
Hur hur hur :p
-
Hur hur hur :p
Well, at least we know who the alpha is there.
-
Michael Corleone: My father is no different than any powerful man, any man with power, like a president or senator.
Kay Adams: Do you know how naive you sound, Michael? Presidents and senators don't have men killed.
Michael Corleone: Oh. Who's being naive, Kay?
-
/Signed.
Kuro, we should just like, optimize or way to the US >_> nothing fun happens around here. Besides, I'm sure they would love the company of 2 random SA people showing up with alcohol, snacks, and more alcohol. <3 Absinthe being legal here.
I don't need alcohol, dude. I'm crazy enough on my own.
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http://www.viruscomix.com/page433.html
-
http://www.viruscomix.com/page433.html
Awww, man! I forgot my apocalypse kit in a comic!
-
Not to great, but when I was much younger I always misheard the song Tiny Dancer as "hold me close young Tony Danza."
-
I love that quote, Tshern. Very nice.
And yes, when lycans attack, just like most wild animals I don't have to outrun everyone, just anyone slower than me. That's why Rachel comes with me when we gather supplies during a zombie apocalypse. She's the bait so I can escape safely.
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nswcrEXqSIQ&feature=related (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nswcrEXqSIQ&feature=related)bloopers
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I love that quote, Tshern. Very nice.
Obviously, the source is that damn awesome.
-
*While MS was helping me study for my Japanese test*
me: I need to be able to say, "the car that Obama rode in during his campaign."
MS: Go ahead and try it
me: *insert some bastardized Japanese*
MS: ...You just said that he drank the thing
...It made me chuckle.
Also:
AC: says some ridiculous SDK-worthy pun while laying in bed with me
Me: *starts tickling him*
AC: OH GOD! WHY ARE YOU TICKLING ME?!
Me: You just made the corniest pun.
AC: SO!?
Me: You have to be PUNished.
Tickle war ensues.
-
AC: says some ridiculous SDK-worthy pun while laying in bed with me
Me: *starts tickling him*
AC: OH GOD! WHY ARE YOU TICKLING ME?!
Me: You just made the corniest pun.
AC: SO!?
Me: You have to be PUNished.
Tickle war insues.
That's it! No more Dominic Deegan for you.
-
:rofl:
-
(http://i38.photobucket.com/albums/e124/j0lt/lolthulhu2.jpg)
-
It's Owlthulhu!
-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lH0OLKAXw3I&NR=1 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lH0OLKAXw3I&NR=1)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UTby_e4-Rhg (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UTby_e4-Rhg)
Two songs by the Klein group.
-
http://www.daddybone.com/
all i want is zombies eating my brains for christmas
-
Saw this, and immediately thought of our lil Noob over there. Here ya go, buddy.
http://www.daisyowl.com/comic/2008-10-14
-
Seems I'm more popular than I thought.
(http://img383.imageshack.us/img383/10/motivator5310378ry7.jpg)
Most of that trope was there before I got there.
-
I don't believe this crap. Link to the article?
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I don't believe this crap. Link to the article?
http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/ArmorIsUseless
Scroll down to tabletop games. I only added the last sentence in the first paragraph, the last two sentences in the second paragraph, and the entire third paragraph. Everything else was there before I got there and very clearly established AC = Fail.
In other words...
Inverted, averted, subverted, and employed straight in Dungeons and Dragons. Armor is the easiest way to get higher Armor Class, but it tops out at a certain point, and using the really heavy armor comes with drawbacks - including limitations on how much AC you can get from Dexterity (which, admittedly, doesn't matter if you happen to have low Dexterity to begin with). Meanwhile, certain characters can't use abilities except in certain kinds of armor (usually medium or light), and some characters can't wear armor at all without losing abilities. Everyone will also eventually find better alternatives to heavy armor, going down to the mithril breastplate, then the mithril chain shirt, then Bracers of Armor while still maintaining the same or better protection.
* However, towards the end of 3.5 Edition the more common cry was "AC is useless", exemplifying this trope since no matter what the outrageous AC your character had, the basic MM creatures had attack bonuses high enough to hit you most of the time. (There were a number of exploits in 3rd edition that allowed you to get your AC over 100, making it difficult for monsters in the epic-level handbook to hit you except on a critical, but those were mostly fixed with 3.5.) Additionally, more hit points were usually conserved by ending a fight quickly than having a higher AC, so it was better to use a two-handed weapon than carry a shield. Though there is a special property called Animated. It's the only way shield use, and by extension "Sword and Board" combat is remotely viable. Mostly though this is just so you can get special properties on the shield without being hindered by it.
o To elaborate, AC is an incredibly expensive stat to boost. You can easily sink 300,000 gold into it and it won't matter despite being essentially maxed out as anything that cares about mundane attacks will hit you 95% of the time anyways. Anything that doesn't will use magic and magic ignores AC 100% of the time. The only reason you're even getting 5% defense is because natural 1s on the 20 sided die for attack rolls always miss no matter what. By comparison, a maxed out weapon is 200,000, and actually helps you. You only get about 760,000 total for all your equipment. On the bright side, stuff like miss chances almost always works and gives you a flat chance to avoid being hit. It's also a lot cheaper.
* The above only applies to 3rd Edition. In earlier editions, heavy metal armor was almost the only way to avoid getting hit in melee combat with powerful monsters-wizards were exceptionally vulnerable unless they found some sort of magical cloaks, bracers or rings that gave them the same protection as armor.
All I did was elaborate on preexisting points in bold. The main point is paragraph 2.
-
Here's an even better one:
(http://img139.imageshack.us/img139/365/motivator32919wx2.jpg)
Mister Sinister gave me the idea without realizing he was giving me the idea.
-
Here's an even better one:
(http://img139.imageshack.us/img139/365/motivator32919wx2.jpg)
Mister Sinister gave me the idea without realizing he was giving me the idea.
Awesome!
-
(http://i240.photobucket.com/albums/ff256/Graytigeress/Other/qwfriendsB.gif)
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http://www.stopsayingfail.com/ (http://www.stopsayingfail.com/)
-
http://www.stopsayingfail.com/ (http://www.stopsayingfail.com/)
...
Fail.
:smirk
-
I love the friggin' Snickers commercials (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UOfibMWr8uY)...
They make me LOL so hard.
I SO want to dress up in costume and go on a road trip. It'd be so much fun!
-
Join the SCA. We do that on a regular basis. :D
-
SCA?
-
Society for Creative Anachronism.
-
http://www.sca.org/
Yes, Society for Creative Anachronism. Essentially, we recreate the the past the way we would have liked to live it. (We're essentially the medieval version of Civil War re-enactors. Or however it's spelled.) Everything from about 1600 and earlier is permitted. I myself am a Norse wanderer.
It's a lot of fun. We're also totally crazy.
-
Whoa... That looks like a TON of work.
I don't think I'd be into that, personally. I don't want to wear a dress, I want to wear armor! I'm more of a brawler... not a lady.
I would get thrown out of those events so quick...
Looks cool though. I actually THOUGHT about it for a minute. Then I realized that I'd probably have to be all lady-like and learn to sew and do girly crafts. Pass.
-
The chapter near me doesn't have gender restrictions, BimR.
-
Excellent, excellent... :plotting
-
You can be as girly, or not, as you choose. I don't know of any areas in the SCA that would restrict what you could do based on gender. I've known quite a few women who put on armor, grab a big stick, and go out to beat the ever-lovin' hell out of the male fighters in the ring.
Just so you know, Royalty for each kingdom changes hands every six months. Three months after the King and Queen are crowned, there's a tournament to see who will become the next Prince and Princess. Normally, a man fights for a lady in the tournament. However, there's been at least one Queen who fought for a man in the tournament, instead.
So, yeah. No gender-based restrictions on activities.
-
Hahaha! Awesome! If I find another job and can earn enough money to buy sufficient attire, I'll totally think about doing it.
Thread-related: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BhVwhJmFmfQ&eurl=http://mfrost.typepad.com/cute_overload/cute_or_sad/index.html (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BhVwhJmFmfQ&eurl=http://mfrost.typepad.com/cute_overload/cute_or_sad/index.html)
This one reminded me of my doggy back home, my doggy being the dobie: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gHCRHPPQDEo (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gHCRHPPQDEo)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lU1CI42_ri0&NR=1 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lU1CI42_ri0&NR=1)
-
http://www.stopsayingfail.com/ (http://www.stopsayingfail.com/)
I love you Prime. That's awesome.
-
AC was making fun of me because I was being racist.
Our two black friends (who were wearing black) were walking up to a tinted window, it was dark outside and the lights were bright inside, and I'm nearsighted, so anything in the dark and far away is blurry and hard to see... Needless to say, I couldn't see them, save for the McDonald's that they were carrying (in white bags). I laughed and mentioned this to AC, and he promptly tells them what I said, and they get all, omgsoracistlol.
I try to defend myself by blurting out: "I'm not racist! I just don't have nightvision!"
That REALLY helped my case.
I need to think more before speaking.
-
At my prom, one of my friends (an incredibly dark black man), wore a black suit, black tie, black everything. There is a picture of him and his date (stereotypical blonde white girl) taken outside at night, where all you can literally see, unless you enhance the image in Pshop, is the blonde girl in a nice dress, and then a disembodied smile.
I kid you not.
-
Do you by any chance have that picture to show to us?
-
AC was making fun of me because I was being racist.
Our two black friends (who were wearing black) were walking up to a tinted window, it was dark outside and the lights were bright inside, and I'm nearsighted, so anything in the dark and far away is blurry and hard to see... Needless to say, I couldn't see them, save for the McDonald's that they were carrying (in white bags). I laughed and mentioned this to AC, and he promptly tells them what I said, and they get all, omgsoracistlol.
I try to defend myself by blurting out: "I'm not racist! I just don't have nightvision!"
That REALLY helped my case.
I need to think more before speaking.
BimR, word of advice... when someone is out to screw with you, thinking before you say anything NEVER helps.
More often than not because people don't care what you think in such situations. :D
-
(http://img529.imageshack.us/img529/5990/128744266789541710bt8.jpg)
-
I dodge your smite and counter with my penis?
-
I dodge your smite and counter with my penis?
...Do I even want to know why your response to a cat is to whip it out?
-
...Do I even want to know why your response to a cat is to whip it out?
It's so he'll remember I've got a better grapple check.
-
Cats have Freedom of Movement as an Ex ability. No raping the pussy. :eh
-
Cats have Freedom of Movement as an Ex ability. No raping the pussy. :eh
Also the Pounce ability with 4 claw attacks. Sure you want to whip that on out?
-
Cats have Freedom of Movement as an Ex ability. No raping the pussy. :eh
Also the Pounce ability with 4 claw attacks. Sure you want to whip that on out?
... On second thought, maybe I'll get my boomstick instead.
-
... On second thought, maybe I'll get my boomstick instead.
Man, I need to get some sleep. I read that and thought: He just said he's going to use his penis again...
-
(small cat wakes up from his nap in the Magical +10 Couch of Hiding) :sofa
(small cat notices one of the humans has his penis out and is displaying it to the other humans) :twitch
(small cat wonders what the fuck these monkeys think they're doing?) :looloo
(there better be food in the dish or there will be smitings handed out when they go to sleep tonight) :smirk
-
(small cat wakes up from his nap in the Magical +10 Couch of Hiding) :sofa
(small cat notices one of the humans has his penis out and is displaying it to the other humans) :twitch
(small cat wonders what the fuck these monkeys think they're doing?) :looloo
(there better be food in the dish or there will be smitings handed out when they go to sleep tonight) :smirk
Epic Win is Epic.
-
http://flickr.com/photos/suzanneandsimon/2145827555/sizes/o/ (http://flickr.com/photos/suzanneandsimon/2145827555/sizes/o/)
-
(http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2008/07/funny-pictures-sleazy-cat-lives-up-to-nickname.jpg)
-
My friend and I were playing online today (we were REALLY bored) and we found some funny vids concerning our favorite video games:
Mario Paint fanatics never cease to amaze me... but this one amazed me, made me think of bhu, AND made me lol:
Meowtal Kombat
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8_P7-8bbOiI&feature=related (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8_P7-8bbOiI&feature=related)
Mega man lyrics:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ykkdvYThT_Y (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ykkdvYThT_Y)
Final Fantasy lyrics:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t8NsnLfIAcs&feature=related (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t8NsnLfIAcs&feature=related)
Okay, and unless you've played Megaman 9 or seen it or something, you won't understand this:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HUZmz2upqr0&feature=related (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HUZmz2upqr0&feature=related)
-
Regarding the Megaman 2 thing, haven't you heard of Okkusenman (http://www.digitalmonkeybox.com/okkusenman_mega_man_rock_song.htm)?
-
I almost flirted back to a step-cousin while visiting the extended family this year.
-
I almost flirted back to a step-cousin while visiting the extended family this year.
Hey, she's a STEP-cousin, technically not related. And even if she was, having sex with your cousin technically doesn't lead to a higher chance of having mutant kids than you were previously. (Seriously, look it up. It was only considered unacceptable extremely recently, and mostly in western culture.)
-
I almost flirted back to a step-cousin while visiting the extended family this year.
Hey, she's a STEP-cousin, technically not related. And even if she was, having sex with your cousin technically doesn't lead to a higher chance of having mutant kids than you were previously. (Seriously, look it up. It was only considered unacceptable extremely recently, and mostly in western culture.)
Hence the almost. There's still the social, "She's your cousin, dude. Could get awkward," that stopped me.
-
Pfah. Never let social stigma's stop you from having fun, as long as you aren't doing anything wrong.
-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sde8zG-CZMA&feature=related One for BimR
-
http://forums.gleemax.com/showpost.php?p=17527531&postcount=6 (http://forums.gleemax.com/showpost.php?p=17527531&postcount=6)
Surreal wins one internet :P
-
http://kotaku.com/5120568/ah-the-delicious-taste-of-tentacle-rape (http://kotaku.com/5120568/ah-the-delicious-taste-of-tentacle-rape)
Geh? ???
-
Win! :D
Also, want! :P
-
I am damn sure you can get all the tentacle rape you want if you really try.
-
No, I meant the drink, you damn commie :P
EDIT: Besides, If I really tried, it wouldn't be rape anymore, now would it? :D
-
http://kotaku.com/5120568/ah-the-delicious-taste-of-tentacle-rape (http://kotaku.com/5120568/ah-the-delicious-taste-of-tentacle-rape)
Geh? ???
Squick. Thanks, Prime.
-
http://www.onmylist.com/category/books/Books_You_Probably_Shouldnt_Buy_Your_Kids_This_Christmas_1 (http://www.onmylist.com/category/books/Books_You_Probably_Shouldnt_Buy_Your_Kids_This_Christmas_1) :D
-
http://www.onmylist.com/category/books/Books_You_Probably_Shouldnt_Buy_Your_Kids_This_Christmas_1 (http://www.onmylist.com/category/books/Books_You_Probably_Shouldnt_Buy_Your_Kids_This_Christmas_1) :D
Epic Win is Epic.
-
Gotta love those.
-
Sorry, I lost it on "Let's Shit in the Woods".
-
http://www.onmylist.com/category/books/Books_You_Probably_Shouldnt_Buy_Your_Kids_This_Christmas_1 (http://www.onmylist.com/category/books/Books_You_Probably_Shouldnt_Buy_Your_Kids_This_Christmas_1) :D
It's been added to.
Niced. :D
-
OMG that was the best :lmao
-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sde8zG-CZMA&feature=related One for BimR
lol that was cute! TY bhu :love
-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sde8zG-CZMA&feature=related One for BimR
lol that was cute! TY bhu :love
I had a feeling it would appeal to you for some reason :D
-
In order to provide some entertainment for AC's mom (it was her birthday today), I did the Timon and Pumbaa dance. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sVRXtalL5MI)
AC was Pumbaa.
That is all.
-
In order to provide some entertainment for AC's mom (it was her birthday today), I did the Timon and Pumbaa dance. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sVRXtalL5MI)
AC was Pumbaa.
That is all.
It was fucking priceless.
-
What, no vid of you guys? :P
-
Aaaaaaaaand I just imagined you guys doing that and I literally fell on the floor laughing :P
-
What, no vid of you guys? :P
Seconded. Kitty wants pictures.
You were in full costume I hope?
-
OMG the Capital One viking commercials make me LOL everytime I see them.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G7-V9DVAPnQ (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G7-V9DVAPnQ)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mhomaIqoiL0&NR=1 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mhomaIqoiL0&NR=1)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=el0RFkSPk-o&NR=1 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=el0RFkSPk-o&NR=1)
And no, Bhu, we weren't in costume for the Timon and Pumbaa thing. :p
-
:lmao
Wow, I just found a video that I posted on Youtube a while ago. Me and AC made it for my psychology class presentation. It was so terrible... Terribly funny! We made it as corny as possible.
The funny part is that it's been viewed about 200 times, and I have one rating: 1 star. That's what made me ROFL.
Also, I remembered what AC's roommate Rich said after he had filmed us: Oh god, I need to go inside and kill things on my XBox.
-
and you're not going to post it?
-
Your brain will melt if you watch it.
I thought I was doing everyone a service by not posting it.
-
...you realize you have to post it now, right?
-
AC quite possibly will murder me if I post it.
...part of me really wants to now. :plot
-
AC quite possibly will murder me if I post it.
...part of me really wants to now. :plot
I didn't know you were into snuff, BimR.
-
Once I've been told not to do something, I almost ALWAYS want to do it instantly.
[spoiler=I did warn you about your brain melting]
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9ZEs0hkNhZo (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9ZEs0hkNhZo)
[/spoiler]
It was nice knowing you all.
-
:twitch
-
:lmao :lmao :lmao
I fucking warned you!!!
-
lol. To be fair, I had to go in and kill things on the Xbox, too.
-
there are no words to describe the sheer strangeness I just watched
-
:twitch
Dude. that was... I'm not sure what to call that...
-
:twitch
Dude. that was... I'm not sure what to call that...
It could've been worse.
Shit I thought she'd be in a reindeer costume beating him with a rubber chikin or something :eh
-
not the worst video i have seen today...
-
Once I've been told not to do something, I almost ALWAYS want to do it instantly.
You are never to send us all pictures of you naked and making out with another hot woman. :pout
-
Once I've been told not to do something, I almost ALWAYS want to do it instantly.
You are never to send us all pictures of you naked and making out with another hot woman. :pout
Or videos for that matter...
-
abosolutely never.
-
Once I've been told not to do something, I almost ALWAYS want to do it instantly.
You are never to send us all pictures of you naked and making out with another hot woman. :pout
And you are positively, absolutely never allowed to send us pictures of japanese schoolgirls in pvc leather spanking an oily naked blond in an S&M dungeon. Ever.
-
:eh Kay.
-
That video gave me hemorrhoidal discomfort.
-
:eh Kay.
AW C'MON!!!
There's a 20 in it for you :D
-
:eh Kay.
AW C'MON!!!
There's a 20 in it for you :D
Subtle, bhu. Whatever happened to reverse psychology?
-
:eh Kay.
AW C'MON!!!
There's a 20 in it for you :D
Subtle, bhu. Whatever happened to reverse psychology?
Apparently that proved to be ineffective :P
-
Bob has a different set of kinks. The chick riding him, even more so.
-
I thought it was actually pretty sweet, in a cute and cuddly way with kittens.
So, Bob's real name is Mary? *writes it down in the stalker notebook*
-
Yeah, AC is called Chris IIRC, in case you want to stalk him aswell :P
-
I have the camera crew. For some reason a bunch of bestiality actresses keep bothering them... I mean technical difficulties. Yeah.
-
Yeah, AC is called Chris IIRC, in case you want to stalk him aswell :P
Stalker. :P
-
I don't stalk AC...much
-
:eh Kay.
AW C'MON!!!
There's a 20 in it for you :D
Subtle, bhu. Whatever happened to reverse psychology?
I have found in my time that subtlety is rarely as much fun as just throwing it out there...
-
I tried to run Tshern's current sig through an internet translator. I think I broke it.
Finnish is an odd language. And at least from the music in Finnish I've heard, it also has what has to be the weirdest vowel sounds I ever heard.
-
I don't stalk AC...much
Stalking AC is a collateral effect of stalking BimR. I swear it's an accident!
-
CountArioch:
Olen hävittänyt kaiken joka sinusta mua muistuttaa
Olen myynyt levyt joita silloin kuuntelin
Ne levyt usein radiossa soivat tai ne voivat olla muitakin
Lähes kaiken sinusta jo melkein unohdin
I have disposed all that reminds me of you
I have sold the records I listened back then
Those records of are often played in the radio or they could be others
I forgot almost everything about you
Disposed might also be 'lost' of you want to translate it as being accidental, not intentional. That doesn't seem to be the message to me though.
Want to run my new signature through the translator?
niin Nukkumatti ylleen heittää unihiekan häivän
Ja huomenna on taas uusi
samanlainen päivä...
elämä on rasvainen tiistai...
-
niin Nukkumatti ylleen heittää unihiekan häivän
Ja huomenna on taas uusi
samanlainen päivä...
elämä on rasvainen tiistai...
Wow, not sure about the words, but I think my translator got the grammar right. That's no fun. All I have to say is
[spoiler]fatty Tuesday. :P[/spoiler]
-
Que?
:P
-
Well it got that piece right... Nukkumatti is something it probably won't even translate. 'Nukkua' means 'to sleep' and Matti is just a male name, together they form Nukkumatti, the Sandman.
-
I hate vowel sounds. I have a mild speech impediment and have serious issues with vowels.
-
Welcome to Finland, the land of 100 vowels per 109 consonants.
-
Welcome to Finland, the land of 100 vowels per 109 consonants.
Your grammar must be an absolute fucking pain in the ass to learn...
-
Welcome to Finland, the land of 100 vowels per 109 consonants.
Are you serious or is that an exaggeration? How do you even manage that on a keyboard? Wierd combinations of letters, CTRL + SHIFT + ALT?
The only other language I learned is German, which isn't that bad given that English is my first language.
-
Welcome to Finland, the land of 100 vowels per 109 consonants.
Are you serious or is that an exaggeration? How do you even manage that on a keyboard? Wierd combinations of letters, CTRL + SHIFT + ALT?
The only other language I learned is German, which isn't that bad given that English is my first language.
In our language we use 100 vowels per 109 consonants. As such we use the same alphabets you do plus å, ä and ö, in that order.
Kuroimaken: Our what? We don't even have rules regarding word order, tossing words around is totally legal.
-
You do use casus then? It would be hell to understand for non-native speakers otherwise.
-
In our language we use 100 vowels per 109 consonants. As such we use the same alphabets you do plus å, ä and ö, in that order.
Ah. You just meant a ratio for how often they're used.
-
You do use casus then? It would be hell to understand for non-native speakers otherwise.
Casus? And it is hell.
-
Casus, like in genitive, nominative, etc. "Case" is the correct English word, I believe.
-
Ah, yes, we use that. Usually done with a simple 'n'. Miika --> Miikan. Gets more complicated if the word happens to end to a consonant, such as every single plural (all end in 't').
-
Ah, yes, we use that. Usually done with a simple 'n'. Miika --> Miikan. Gets more complicated if the word happens to end to a consonant, such as every single plural (all end in 't').
You Finnish and your crazy consonants.
-
Consonants I can do pretty easily. It's just making a sound with your teeth, lips, and tongue. Vowels you have to hold your mouth perfectly and make some sort of weird animal sound and hold it for the right amount of time and put the right inflection on it. I generally skip vowels when I speak, much to the chagrin of anyone who doesn't know me well and can translate. For example, at work when I ask someone if I can help them find something, it comes out "Cn I hlpu fnd smthng?" Hate vowels, and when I'm emperor of the world they'll be abolished. Finns and Hawaiians will have to just deal.
-
We Portuguese speakers are also pretty much screwed then too.
-
im sorry i know these are terrible.. but funny.
http://www.reddit.com/r/funny/comments/7rxyh/collection_of_totally_offensive_jokes_not_for_the/
-
What does an agnostic dyslexic insomniac do? Stays up all night wondering if there really is a dog.
-
We Portuguese speakers are also pretty much screwed then too.
Lousy Portuguese and their vowels, think they're so hot.
-
What does an agnostic dyslexic insomniac do? Stays up all night wondering if there really is a dog.
:D :D
This is brilliant!
-
What does an agnostic dyslexic insomniac do? Stays up all night wondering if there really is a dog.
I LOL'ed
-
What does an agnostic dyslexic insomniac do? Stays up all night wondering if there really is a dog.
I LOL'ed
Same here :D
-
We Portuguese speakers are also pretty much screwed then too.
Lousy Portuguese and their vowels, think they're so hot.
We do have a crazy ass grammar though.
-
From what I know/from I've heard we're somewhat different from other languages in terms of grammar as well, but our vowel-to-consonant ratio isn't bigger than 30-70/40-60 in extreme cases either...
-
I can tell that Finnish has the second most vowels per vocals, the aforementioned 100:109 ratio, only Portuguese beats us at that.
-
I can tell that Finnish has the second most vowels per vocals, the aforementioned 100:109 ratio, only Portuguese beats us at that.
I don't actually have a source to confirm it, but I do believe it's been mentioned a few times that Portuguese is one of the most grammatically complex languages in the world.
We have prepositions for prepositions and verbs for verbs. We don't get as crazy as Japanese in terms of nouns (they have practically one to three terms for each and everything they deal with) but we do beat them in synonyms (and we also have exclusive words, such as saudade, which is literally the feeling of missing something, which is untranslatable in English and half a dozen other languages).
-
I bet it is, I believe I've heard that too. From active languages, the most difficult is often said to be Chinese and Finnish standing 2nd or 3rd, depending on the source.
And exclusive words kick ass. I love to live in a country that has a unique language.
-
I've only learned a couple of words of Chinese (read: Mandarin) so far, and that's all to Firefly.
I don't think I could actually learn an entire language like that, especially at the moment...
-
I've only learned a couple of words of Chinese (read: Mandarin) so far, and that's all to Firefly.
I don't think I could actually learn an entire language like that, especially at the moment...
It's not really as hard as I might make it out to be. I have a very nice grasp of how it works, but then again I am considered to be somewhat skilled at learning languages (I learned English mostly by playing videogames). I'd be terrible at teaching it though, since my "knowledge" is more of a feel than anything.
And exclusive words kick ass. I love to live in a country that has a unique language.
Word!
-
I learned english mostly by watching a lot of TV as a child...
Then again, english is fairly easy :)
-
I remember one friend of mine making a joke about English being easy:
"Why do you think American kids have English as their first language?"
-
I can tell that Finnish has the second most vowels per vocals, the aforementioned 100:109 ratio, only Portuguese beats us at that.
That's not all. I don't know what Portugeuse is, but Hawaiian has a vowel/consonant ratio of 3:2. However, it is considered to be nearly extinct, but I'd put money on the closely related Maori and Rapa-nui languages beating Finnish as well.
-
I remember one friend of mine making a joke about English being easy:
"Why do you think American kids have English as their first language?"
English is easy on a conversational level, but an unbelievable bitch once you get to higher education. Most colleges use English as a program to scrub out people who aren't motivated enough. I failed out of the gen ed english class twice before I managed to get through it.
-
I remember one friend of mine making a joke about English being easy:
"Why do you think American kids have English as their first language?"
English is easy on a conversational level, but an unbelievable bitch once you get to higher education. Most colleges use English as a program to scrub out people who aren't motivated enough. I failed out of the gen ed english class twice before I managed to get through it.
Really? I can translate college-level papers without so much as breaking a sweat. (Occasional technical terms might elude me, but then again, they do so for everyone.)
-
Yea, the problems I've ever had with English were some of the fancier clause structures (because the formal construction differs greatly from conversational pacing) and in actually identifying things.
To me, it's like putting on shoes; I don't need to know what the top part of the toe area is called, I just have to know whether or not it's thick enough to handle the type of things I plan on doing in those shoes.
-
As an English teacher, all I can say is: Future Perfect Continuous Tense! :banghead
-
As an English teacher, all I can say is: Future Perfect Continuous Tense! :banghead
Sometimes, I think you guys just make that shit up.
-
As an English teacher, all I can say is: Future Perfect Continuous Tense! :banghead
I will have been up for 48 hours come tomorrow morning.
-
I remember one friend of mine making a joke about English being easy:
"Why do you think American kids have English as their first language?"
English is easy on a conversational level, but an unbelievable bitch once you get to higher education. Most colleges use English as a program to scrub out people who aren't motivated enough. I failed out of the gen ed english class twice before I managed to get through it.
Really? I can translate college-level papers without so much as breaking a sweat. (Occasional technical terms might elude me, but then again, they do so for everyone.)
Reading is easy. Writing is a bitch. Especially when every teacher has a different idea of what constitutes proper written English. My first-semester English teacher took an entire letter-grade off a paper because I put a period after a quotation mark. My second semester teacher took off a letter grade because I put a period before a quotation mark.
So to this day, I have no idea which sentence is right:
"I have a towel".
"I have a towel."
I asked a friend that's an English teacher, and she said that her English department was in the middle of a civil war over that punctuation.
Tons of stuff like that. You are expected to know all that minutiae and use it correctly, and in some cases read the teacher's mind because English is a constantly evolving language with roughly 2 million words in it at the most recent estimate.
-
I was given to understand that the period belongs inside the quotation mark.
-
I was given to understand that the period belongs inside the quotation mark.
Three different teachers have given me three different answers on that. :p
-
The period thing depends.
If you're directly quoting someone but not officially citing them, the period's in the quotation marks. Like if you were writing a story involving a chick named Sue:
Sue said, "How about another hotdog?"
But if you're citing some random fact that you didn't know, you need to cite it, and the period goes after the quotation marks.
As W.E.B Du Bois said, "I like peaches" (102).
-
:backtotopic
This (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tt_uudyw6fo) is funny. :smirk
Me and AC think it's funny, at least.
Oh, and it's dedicated to SDK. We thought he'd enjoy it... about as much as the first video we did.
-
As an English teacher, all I can say is: Future Perfect Continuous Tense! :banghead
I will have been up for 48 hours come tomorrow morning.
That's the one! Japanese students get really confused when you start talking about the future as if it was the past, or talking about now from a point in the future. :lol
I was given to understand that the period belongs inside the quotation mark.
Three different teachers have given me three different answers on that. :p
Here's your fourth! In MOST cases the period goes inside the quotation marks, must like in MOST cases the period goes outside the brackets. There are exceptions (this is English, after all). :rollseyes
-
Of course, assuming I was taught correctly, other punctuation goes outside the quotation marks if it is different than the context of the quote.
He actually said "and then I put it in the ice cream"?
Also... I hate that '?!' (or '!?') is not present in formal English, as it's tone in a conversation is obviously different than both a plain question and a normal exclamation.
-
I remember one friend of mine making a joke about English being easy:
"Why do you think American kids have English as their first language?"
English is easy on a conversational level, but an unbelievable bitch once you get to higher education. Most colleges use English as a program to scrub out people who aren't motivated enough. I failed out of the gen ed english class twice before I managed to get through it.
Aye, you've certainly got a point there.
-
:backtotopic
This (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tt_uudyw6fo) is funny. :smirk
Me and AC think it's funny, at least.
Oh, and it's dedicated to SDK. We thought he'd enjoy it... about as much as the first video we did.
I found the 'scary box' to be hilarious :)
-
I can tell that Finnish has the second most vowels per vocals, the aforementioned 100:109 ratio, only Portuguese beats us at that.
That's not all. I don't know what Portugeuse is, but Hawaiian has a vowel/consonant ratio of 3:2. However, it is considered to be nearly extinct, but I'd put money on the closely related Maori and Rapa-nui languages beating Finnish as well.
Sorry, didn't specify I meant European languages...
-
I can tell that Finnish has the second most vowels per vocals, the aforementioned 100:109 ratio, only Portuguese beats us at that.
That's not all. I don't know what Portugeuse is, but Hawaiian has a vowel/consonant ratio of 3:2. However, it is considered to be nearly extinct, but I'd put money on the closely related Maori and Rapa-nui languages beating Finnish as well.
Sorry, didn't specify I meant European languages...
Well, honestly I can forgive you for not taking in account a language that's only spoken by about 200 people as a native tongue, and about 27,000 as a second language, mostly concentrated on 7 islands in the middle of the pacific ocean. I only know because I had a brief e-fling with a hawaiian girl a while back. Never made anything of it though, and she recently married a guy that isn't me. I rank that as one of my most colossal failures.
-
:backtotopic
This (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tt_uudyw6fo) is funny. :smirk
Me and AC think it's funny, at least.
Oh, and it's dedicated to SDK. We thought he'd enjoy it... about as much as the first video we did.
Uh, AC? PANTS, PLEASE! That is all.
-
As an English teacher, all I can say is: Future Perfect Continuous Tense! :banghead
I will have been up for 48 hours come tomorrow morning.
Ah.... I thought everyone knew that.... Must be the multiple years of latin.
-
:backtotopic
This (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tt_uudyw6fo) is funny. :smirk
Me and AC think it's funny, at least.
Oh, and it's dedicated to SDK. We thought he'd enjoy it... about as much as the first video we did.
:twitch
That is all...
-
Thats it? I expected more.
-
Uh, AC? PANTS, PLEASE! That is all.
Hahaha! He's wearing boxers. I guess he must've been looking for his dice again.
-
Uh, AC? PANTS, PLEASE! That is all.
Hahaha! He's wearing boxers. I guess he must've been looking for his dice again.
Why...no, I'm not even going to ask.
-
:backtotopic
This (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tt_uudyw6fo) is funny. :smirk
Me and AC think it's funny, at least.
Oh, and it's dedicated to SDK. We thought he'd enjoy it... about as much as the first video we did.
:twitch
I want my three minutes back! :p
-
http://www.youtube.com/user/yourfriendy?blend=1
-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tjNre1yI668&feature=related (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tjNre1yI668&feature=related)[fucking OW]
-
Yeah...I've done some of those. Fucking hurts.
-
and you know the sucky part is they dont have a lotta mass to absorb that hit either
-
Neither did my balls when I landed on them straddling the beam :(
-
Next on Ow My Balls!...
-
Neither did my balls when I landed on them straddling the beam :(
:twitch
You have my sympathies kind sir...
-
Next on Ow My Balls!...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P2-ESMCZgVw
-
Next on Ow My Balls!...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P2-ESMCZgVw
DAMMIT, D!
-
No testicles were harmed in the making of this webpage:
http://www.dandwiki.com/wiki/Mr._Rogers_(DnD_Deity) (http://www.dandwiki.com/wiki/Mr._Rogers_(DnD_Deity))
-
Next on Ow My Balls!...
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P2-ESMCZgVw
DAMMIT, D!
A HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!
-
Ow! My Balls!
-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RRq_YRngjx8 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RRq_YRngjx8)
I watched this in class today and was ROFLing from it. I also made AC watch it. Now it's your turn. :D
-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RRq_YRngjx8 (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RRq_YRngjx8)
I watched this in class today and was ROFLing from it. I also made AC watch it. Now it's your turn. :D
So getting added to my playlists
-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BKfvpyAXtGs
Combining multiple ROFLs into one hilarious package.
-
:backtotopic
This (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tt_uudyw6fo) is funny. :smirk
Me and AC think it's funny, at least.
Oh, and it's dedicated to SDK. We thought he'd enjoy it... about as much as the first video we did.
*enters new coordinates for satellite-directed laser beam*
Pay ME Tribute? Tribute! You steal men's souls, BiMR and make them your slaves!
-
Apparently an attempt to mock evolution. All I can say is,
W (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=664tvtaWMFw) T (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ohrV6xA9Kbw) F (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WCgrCHXliQg&feature=related)
(Each letter is a different link)
-
Pay ME Tribute? Tribute! You steal men's souls, BiMR and make them your slaves!
Shhhh!!! I'm making a fortune selling those things on the black market! Don't ruin it all!
-
http://www.xmission.com/~emailbox/funnyphotos.htm
http://www.sugarbushsquirrel.com/
-
:backtotopic
This (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tt_uudyw6fo) is funny. :smirk
Me and AC think it's funny, at least.
Oh, and it's dedicated to SDK. We thought he'd enjoy it... about as much as the first video we did.
*enters new coordinates for satellite-directed laser beam*
Pay ME Tribute? Tribute! You steal men's souls, BiMR and make them your slaves!
You're Doing It Wrong.
-
I've been told this is old, but still...
http://magneticdiscovery.com/ (http://magneticdiscovery.com/)
http://timecube.com/ (http://timecube.com/)
:twitch :lmao
-
I've been told this is old, but still...
http://magneticdiscovery.com/ (http://magneticdiscovery.com/)
http://timecube.com/ (http://timecube.com/)
:twitch :lmao
wtf?
-
Yeah, TimeCube's been around forever. Although I hadn't realized he actually updated that site at some point for the latest round of elections!
I have known true fear by reading all the way through that site. It's a trip, lemme tell you.
-
http://www.google.com/webhp?hl=xx-pirate (http://www.google.com/webhp?hl=xx-pirate)
-
(http://www.bannedinhollywood.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/02/fundies.jpg)
-
That reminds me of Gloria from Devil May Cry 4.
-
This (http://www.drunkrepublic.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=97:when-your-credit-card-signature-fun-backfires&catid=34:humor&Itemid=60?) is win.
-
That was hilarious.
-
One time I drew a picture of an elephant as my signature for a credit purchase. Good times.
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I always sign mind "Penis" whenever I shop at walmart. It only prints out the signature every couple times for me. It's always good for a laugh from the cashiers, even the really old ones.
Sadly enough, it's close enough to the spelling of my real name people usually don't notice >.<
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I always sign mind "Penis" whenever I shop at walmart. It only prints out the signature every couple times for me. It's always good for a laugh from the cashiers, even the really old ones.
Sadly enough, it's close enough to the spelling of my real name people usually don't notice >.<
Please tell me your parents didn't name you Enis! :lmao
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Hah, no, but my name signature looks about the same.
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*while talking about alignments*
Me: How'd I get stuck with you, a Lawful Asshole?
AC: About the same way I got stuck with you, Chaotic Bitch.
Zing.
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I am currently tempted to make a "Things that make you lol but you can't admit it" thread.
Like gay elf jokes.
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Not many people who'll get this, but
This is not Guy Shishioh's lucky day. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BsNn06EdIyE&fmt=18)
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I just made cufflinks out of garbage bag twist-tie thingies. Note to self, next time you buy a shirt, make sure it has buttons or you have cufflinks...
EDIT: So, stumbleupon just showed me this terrifying story (http://community.livejournal.com/housematehorror/1451.html). Not exactly a lol thing, but this seemed the most appropriate thread.
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(http://izismile.com/img/img2/20090401/selection_125_64.jpg)
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Epic :lmao
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HAHAHA. Tshern, that's amazingly hilarious. :lol
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Where did you get that?
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Internet, obviously. Can't recall where exactly.
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At my prom, one of my friends (an incredibly dark black man), wore a black suit, black tie, black everything. There is a picture of him and his date (stereotypical blonde white girl) taken outside at night, where all you can literally see, unless you enhance the image in Pshop, is the blonde girl in a nice dress, and then a disembodied smile.
I kid you not.
I have had a similar experience with a former roommate of mine. For reference, he's a 6'6" black man, and is into White Wolf games, including STing at 2 Vampire LARPs.
So we're heading to a party at a friend's, who lives in the middle of nowhere. We get there around 8:00 (well after dark), and my roommate gets out while I finish parking. Now mind you he's wearing a dark shirt and black pants. I get out of the car ... and can't see him anywhere. I call out, and all of a sudden I see this floating smile appear out of the darkness about 6 1/2 feet in the air, 20 feet away. It was freaky.
He has since dubbed this power "Blackuscate" (after the vampire discipline Obfuscate, which is the power used to conceal yourself).
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It's hilarious if you see it coming and get to watch everyone else's reactions :)
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I have had a similar experience with a former roommate of mine. For reference, he's a 6'6" black man, and is into White Wolf games, including STing at 2 Vampire LARPs.
So we're heading to a party at a friend's, who lives in the middle of nowhere. We get there around 8:00 (well after dark), and my roommate gets out while I finish parking. Now mind you he's wearing a dark shirt and black pants. I get out of the car ... and can't see him anywhere. I call out, and all of a sudden I see this floating smile appear out of the darkness about 6 1/2 feet in the air, 20 feet away. It was freaky.
He has since dubbed this power "Blackuscate" (after the vampire discipline Obfuscate, which is the power used to conceal yourself).
My best friend has the same trick (he's white though). He doesn't even mean to do it, but virtually everyone will forget he's in a room.
Case 1: It was really bad. We sat together in our Chemistry class in High School (a little over three years ago). The teacher never called on us to answer a single question unless we moved back two more rows, even if one of us was sleeping during class (and I mean audibly sleeping, not "head down, do not piss me off" sleeping). He even managed to pass the class with a B, despite the two of us never doing a lick of work. I passed because I'm damn good at tests and lab work.
Case 2: During a college Humanities class, the instructor wanted to start showing the class a video after they got back from break. My friend never even left his seat to go on break. Everyone comes back, and the teacher waits for 10 minutes. After the 10 minutes passed, he said "We'll start the movie when [Friend] gets back". People started snickering. It was a good 2 minutes before the instructor finally asked if anyone knew where my friend was. He raised his hand and said he's been in the room the entire time, and he never left for the break. Cue laughter from everyone else. Again, he was sitting in the front row.
Case 3: Several times, he's been over to my house only to hear my parent ask if he left. Mind you, she's in the same room as he is when she says this. Every. Single. Time. It never gets old.
This friend of mine isn't exactly easy to miss. He has enough hair that we joke about him being on TV every time a Big Foot claim gets aired (seriously, his arms make him look like he's wearing a damn sweater). He also looks like a body guard (and even has the black belt in Judo to back up the image). Furthermore, he may be quiet, but his voice is deep and loud enough to hear a mile away. If he says something, most people will hear it (and pay attention, as he is very intimidating even when he doesn't mean to be).
Seriously, the guy's built like a grisly. How these people manage to overlook him when he's right fucking there is beyond me.
And, to finish the post: I found this particular part funny. The irony tickled me.
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I have had a similar experience with a former roommate of mine. For reference, he's a 6'6" black man, and is into White Wolf games, including STing at 2 Vampire LARPs.
So we're heading to a party at a friend's, who lives in the middle of nowhere. We get there around 8:00 (well after dark), and my roommate gets out while I finish parking. Now mind you he's wearing a dark shirt and black pants. I get out of the car ... and can't see him anywhere. I call out, and all of a sudden I see this floating smile appear out of the darkness about 6 1/2 feet in the air, 20 feet away. It was freaky.
He has since dubbed this power "Blackuscate" (after the vampire discipline Obfuscate, which is the power used to conceal yourself).
My best friend has the same trick (he's white though). He doesn't even mean to do it, but virtually everyone will forget he's in a room.
Case 1: It was really bad. We sat together in our Chemistry class in High School (a little over three years ago). The teacher never called on us to answer a single question unless we moved back two more rows, even if one of us was sleeping during class (and I mean audibly sleeping, not "head down, do not piss me off" sleeping). He even managed to pass the class with a B, despite the two of us never doing a lick of work. I passed because I'm damn good at tests and lab work.
Case 2: During a college Humanities class, the instructor wanted to start showing the class a video after they got back from break. My friend never even left his seat to go on break. Everyone comes back, and the teacher waits for 10 minutes. After the 10 minutes passed, he said "We'll start the movie when [Friend] gets back". People started snickering. It was a good 2 minutes before the instructor finally asked if anyone knew where my friend was. He raised his hand and said he's been in the room the entire time, and he never left for the break. Cue laughter from everyone else. Again, he was sitting in the front row.
Case 3: Several times, he's been over to my house only to hear my parent ask if he left. Mind you, she's in the same room as he is when she says this. Every. Single. Time. It never gets old.
This friend of mine isn't exactly easy to miss. He has enough hair that we joke about him being on TV every time a Big Foot claim gets aired (seriously, his arms make him look like he's wearing a damn sweater). He also looks like a body guard (and even has the black belt in Judo to back up the image). Furthermore, he may be quiet, but his voice is deep and loud enough to hear a mile away. If he says something, most people will hear it (and pay attention, as he is very intimidating even when he doesn't mean to be).
Seriously, the guy's built like a grisly. How these people manage to overlook him when he's right fucking there is beyond me.
And, to finish the post: I found this particular part funny. The irony tickled me.
Guy's always Moving Silently even when he doesn't mean to, huh?
Back in high school, people tended not to realize I approached a group conversation until I spoke up, even when I happened to be inside someone's field of vision; at which point, when I did speak, people would almost literally jump and/or squeak. Gave me a laugh every time.
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I have had a similar experience with a former roommate of mine. For reference, he's a 6'6" black man, and is into White Wolf games, including STing at 2 Vampire LARPs.
So we're heading to a party at a friend's, who lives in the middle of nowhere. We get there around 8:00 (well after dark), and my roommate gets out while I finish parking. Now mind you he's wearing a dark shirt and black pants. I get out of the car ... and can't see him anywhere. I call out, and all of a sudden I see this floating smile appear out of the darkness about 6 1/2 feet in the air, 20 feet away. It was freaky.
He has since dubbed this power "Blackuscate" (after the vampire discipline Obfuscate, which is the power used to conceal yourself).
My best friend has the same trick (he's white though). He doesn't even mean to do it, but virtually everyone will forget he's in a room.
Case 1: It was really bad. We sat together in our Chemistry class in High School (a little over three years ago). The teacher never called on us to answer a single question unless we moved back two more rows, even if one of us was sleeping during class (and I mean audibly sleeping, not "head down, do not piss me off" sleeping). He even managed to pass the class with a B, despite the two of us never doing a lick of work. I passed because I'm damn good at tests and lab work.
Case 2: During a college Humanities class, the instructor wanted to start showing the class a video after they got back from break. My friend never even left his seat to go on break. Everyone comes back, and the teacher waits for 10 minutes. After the 10 minutes passed, he said "We'll start the movie when [Friend] gets back". People started snickering. It was a good 2 minutes before the instructor finally asked if anyone knew where my friend was. He raised his hand and said he's been in the room the entire time, and he never left for the break. Cue laughter from everyone else. Again, he was sitting in the front row.
Case 3: Several times, he's been over to my house only to hear my parent ask if he left. Mind you, she's in the same room as he is when she says this. Every. Single. Time. It never gets old.
This friend of mine isn't exactly easy to miss. He has enough hair that we joke about him being on TV every time a Big Foot claim gets aired (seriously, his arms make him look like he's wearing a damn sweater). He also looks like a body guard (and even has the black belt in Judo to back up the image). Furthermore, he may be quiet, but his voice is deep and loud enough to hear a mile away. If he says something, most people will hear it (and pay attention, as he is very intimidating even when he doesn't mean to be).
Seriously, the guy's built like a grisly. How these people manage to overlook him when he's right fucking there is beyond me.
And, to finish the post: I found this particular part funny. The irony tickled me.
Guy's always Moving Silently even when he doesn't mean to, huh?
Back in high school, people tended not to realize I approached a group conversation until I spoke up, even when I happened to be inside someone's field of vision; at which point, when I did speak, people would almost literally jump and/or squeak. Gave me a laugh every time.
In high school, a friend of mine managed to lose track of me when I was directly behind him in the lunch line. It was rather amusing.
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So how many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Depends on the type of person.
Gay people: six. One to change it and the other five to scream how awesome the guy is.
Socialites: two. One to call the electrician while the other gets the drinks.
Psychologists: only one, but the lamp needs to WANT to be changed.
Blondes: 5. One to hold the lamp while the other four spin the chair.
Consultants: two, because one always abandons the project halfway.
Drunkards: one, to hold the lamp while the rooftop spins.
Gay activists: none. The lamp doesn't need to change to be accepted by society!
Country music singers: two, one changes the lamp while the other composes a song about how much better the old lamp was.
Macho men: none. Macho men don't fear the dark.
Daddy's little girls: two, one holds onto the Light Pepsi while the other calls daddy.
Argentines (i.e. people from Argentina): um, he holds onto the lamp while the world revolves all around him.
Do you know what the best deal in business is? Buying an argentine for what he's worth and selling him for what he thinks he's worth.
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Back in high school, people tended not to realize I approached a group conversation until I spoke up, even when I happened to be inside someone's field of vision; at which point, when I did speak, people would almost literally jump and/or squeak. Gave me a laugh every time.
This is still me now. It's hilarious, since I carry my keys on my belt, so they clearly jingle as I walk, so people don't flip out when they realize I've walked up. It helps that I am the security head where I work, so all sorts of hilarity tends to follow. I've just gotta figure out who came up with the nickname of "Rent-a-ninja" now to apply to me.
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Do you know what the best deal in business is? Buying an argentine for what he's worth and selling him for what he thinks he's worth.
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About not being seen? I get that. Usually when I am trying to ask a girl out, she walks away in mid-sentence as if I wasn't talking directly at her.
One day, I hope to meet a woman that's worth the amount of effort it takes to get her attention.
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Could always use Chloroform as your opening line. I've found they can't walk away from me until I'm done talking if they're unconscious.
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"Excuse me, does this smell like chloroform to you?" :lmao
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About not being seen? I get that. Usually when I am trying to ask a girl out, she walks away in mid-sentence as if I wasn't talking directly at her.
One day, I hope to meet a woman that's worth the amount of effort it takes to get her attention.
You should totally try to ask me out, I'd listen.
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About not being seen? I get that. Usually when I am trying to ask a girl out, she walks away in mid-sentence as if I wasn't talking directly at her.
One day, I hope to meet a woman that's worth the amount of effort it takes to get her attention.
You should totally try to ask me out, I'd listen.
Wait, you have boobs and a vagina now???
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About not being seen? I get that. Usually when I am trying to ask a girl out, she walks away in mid-sentence as if I wasn't talking directly at her.
One day, I hope to meet a woman that's worth the amount of effort it takes to get her attention.
You should totally try to ask me out, I'd listen.
Wait, you have boobs and a vagina now???
Never doubt the powers of gender-changing of the internet.
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GIRL (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/GIRL)
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GIRL (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/GIRL)
That's actually really creepy! Who would post up pictures of their own daughter and then pretend to be them? I got shivers when I thought about that.
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I was counting on the fact that CA might be desperate enough to try to hit me.
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GIRL (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/GIRL)
My favorite part: "Welcome to the internet, where the men are men, the women are men, and the children are FBI agents." :lmao
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My best friend has the same trick (he's white though). He doesn't even mean to do it, but virtually everyone will forget he's in a room.
Sounds like he's a Void Incarnate (http://www.wizards.com/default.asp?x=dnd/ei/20030418a).
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In other news, a local (as in nationwide) magazine can't really tell the difference between guy and girl porn (or hardcore and softcore porn for that matter). They had this relatively short article on some woman who happened to direct girl porn like it was something "new". Asia freaking Carrera retired as an actress five years ago and she directs now, but not so much as a whistle for her.
Gotta love when people are idiots.
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GIRL (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/GIRL)
That's actually really creepy! Who would post up pictures of their own daughter and then pretend to be them? I got shivers when I thought about that.
Pffft. We all know you're AC's alt.
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GIRL (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/GIRL)
That's actually really creepy! Who would post up pictures of their own daughter and then pretend to be them? I got shivers when I thought about that.
Pffft. We all know you're AC's alt.
I always figured AC was BimR's alt....
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GIRL (http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/GIRL)
My favorite part: "Welcome to the internet, where the men are men, the women are men, and the children are FBI agents." :lmao
They are right, it's older than they think. That saying has been around since chat rooms were born.
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Pffft. We all know you're AC's alt.
I always figured AC was BimR's alt....
:lmao I've been found out! Or he's been found out! Which is it?
On a side note: you should totally see me and AC try to imitate each other. It gets really mean and nasty really fast. :D
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Pffft. We all know you're AC's alt.
I always figured AC was BimR's alt....
:lmao I've been found out! Or he's been found out! Which is it?
On a side note: you should totally see me and AC try to imitate each other. It gets really mean and nasty really fast. :D
It's just much easier on the psyche to think that hawt elf girl sometimes pretends to have cajones, rather than AC in drag as hawt elf GIRL. :p
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You know you like it Inna, ;)
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Where are these pictures that keep getting referenced? I'm positive I've not seen any guy-dressed-as-a-hawt-elf pictures laying about anywhere... :P
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Check the Real Life pictures thread for pictures of many of our members, including the elusive BobismyRhino.
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McPoyo wants those pics of you dressed as the elf, AC. :P
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He's gonna have to pay, just like everyone else. :D
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Send $25 to:...... :whistle
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You only got that discount because we like you, Inna. :P
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Actually, they're plastered all over CNN by now, if my informant got the money from the drop point like he was supposed to.
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:P
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Ah, found the picture referenced.
Is it sad that when I saw the picture I immediately focused on the ears and forgot about the rest of the picture while I attempted to zoom in to see how they were attached?
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Ah, found the picture referenced.
Is it sad that when I saw the picture I immediately focused on the ears and forgot about the rest of the picture while I attempted to zoom in to see how they were attached?
:lmao
Spirit Gum.
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So I opened today, like I do every Sunday, and I expected a hectic, yet fairly normal day (normal is a relative term). Part of my duties includes setting up the line, putting things like chopped onions and tomatoes, cheeses, pickles, and sandwich vegatables in containers for the rail cooler. On Monday we got some hot dogs and brats because baseball season started. It was a one time thing, but we still have a buttload of them left. These are served with pickle relish (which we have a gallon jug of, and use for other things as well).
Now, the closers have the opposite task as me. They take all the things off of the line and put them away. Things like liquids (pickle relish) aren't put back in their containers for obvious reasons, but things like sandwich lettuce are fine to put in the bags that we keep them in (cause it's sandwich lettuce, that's all we use it for).
This does not seem to be too hard a task, right? Take the pickles, put them in the pickle cambro. Take the relish, cover it and put it in the cooler.
When I opened the pickle relish jug. I found pickles. They took the pickles. And put them in the relish. I was almost in tears I was laughing so hard. They didn't put the relish in the pickle cambro either, they put the relish in the relish container, and then duped the pickles in it.
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Ah, found the picture referenced.
Is it sad that when I saw the picture I immediately focused on the ears and forgot about the rest of the picture while I attempted to zoom in to see how they were attached?
Maybe just a little bit. :P
Also, dman: Wow. That's just...wow.
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dman, I just laughed out loud in my office. That was hilarious.
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This:
[spoiler=Warning, blasphemy ahead]
(http://i667.photobucket.com/albums/vv39/JoopKoenraads/Motivators%20and%20Macros/AreYouReadyToRock2-1.jpg)
[/spoiler]
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I like Paul better. He was FUCKING METAL.
Current Pope can't hold so much as a candy wrapper to him, much less a candle.
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Well, that was John Paul II on that image, right? Doesn't look like Benedict to me...
For a truly metal pope we need Rob Halford though :P
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Well, that was John Paul II on that image, right? Doesn't look like Benedict to me...
For a truly metal pope we need Rob Halford though :P
No, we need Ozzy Osbourne.
Guy's already treated as some kind of god by most metalheads, he might as well cash in on that, right?
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Well, that was John Paul II on that image, right? Doesn't look like Benedict to me...
For a truly metal pope we need Rob Halford though :P
No, we need Ozzy Osbourne.
Guy's already treated as some kind of god by most metalheads, he might as well cash in on that, right?
Actually, he's the backbone of the Mafia's drug trade. 90% of his body is cocaine, after all.
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Well, that was John Paul II on that image, right? Doesn't look like Benedict to me...
For a truly metal pope we need Rob Halford though :P
No, we need Ozzy Osbourne.
Guy's already treated as some kind of god by most metalheads, he might as well cash in on that, right?
Actually, he's the backbone of the Mafia's drug trade. 90% of his body is cocaine, after all.
Really? I could have sworn there was some crack in there.
Not that it would keep him from his priestly duties or anything. After all, the current Pope often says things that make me wonder what the hell he's been smoking in the morning.
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BimR and I went for a walk today. And quickly started insulting each other...
AC: Stop being poopy.
BimR: You stop being poopy. *grabs AC's nipple* Even your nipples say you're being poopy.
AC: *Gropes BimR* Even your nipples say you're being a bitch.
BimR: I DON'T HAVE NIPPLES!
AC: ... :lmao
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BimR and I went for a walk today. And quickly started insulting each other...
AC: Stop being poopy.
BimR: You stop being poopy. *grabs AC's nipple* Even your nipples say you're being poopy.
AC: *Gropes BimR* Even your nipples say you're being a bitch.
BimR: I DON'T HAVE NIPPLES!
AC: ... :lmao
AC, you totally should have replied "of course you do! All six of them."
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Oh god, Kuro! :lmao
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BimR and I went for a walk today. And quickly started insulting each other...
AC: Stop being poopy.
BimR: You stop being poopy. *grabs AC's nipple* Even your nipples say you're being poopy.
AC: *Gropes BimR* Even your nipples say you're being a bitch.
BimR: I DON'T HAVE NIPPLES!
AC: ... :lmao
AC, you totally should have replied "of course you do! All six of them."
I fell out of my chair laughing.
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pics or it didnt happen?
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Oh god, Kuro! :lmao
I didn't realize bitches were catholic!
Seriously though, I probably wouldn't be able to make a comeback like that on the spot. I seriously need to speed up my vocal skills - I usually have total zingers come to me within 30 seconds of a specific quote, but by then it's too late to use them.
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Oh god, Kuro! :lmao
I didn't realize bitches were catholic!
Seriously though, I probably wouldn't be able to make a comeback like that on the spot. I seriously need to speed up my vocal skills - I usually have total zingers come to me within 30 seconds of a specific quote, but by then it's too late to use them.
I always think of the right thing to say about 5 minutes too late. Which is not very helpful.
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On a secondary note, BimR and AC sound like people I'd love to hang out with in real life, if only I didn't live so very close to the asscrack of the planet.
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You live in pittsburgh? :P
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[quote author=Kuroimaken link=topic=2119.msg134375#msg134375 date=1239673393Seriously though, I probably wouldn't be able to make a comeback like that on the spot. I seriously need to speed up my vocal skills - I usually have total zingers come to me within 30 seconds of a specific quote, but by then it's too late to use them.
[/quote]This is actually why my best friend and I have the 8 second rule. If you can't make a comeback in 8 seconds, it doesn't count (unless ridiculously hilarious, but even then it usually doesn't.) It's done wonders for my ability to react on my feet.
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Well, that was John Paul II on that image, right? Doesn't look like Benedict to me...
For a truly metal pope we need Rob Halford though :P
No, we need Ozzy Osbourne.
Guy's already treated as some kind of god by most metalheads, he might as well cash in on that, right?
And he is already feeble enough to become a Pope. Almost.
-
Well, that was John Paul II on that image, right? Doesn't look like Benedict to me...
For a truly metal pope we need Rob Halford though :P
No, we need Ozzy Osbourne.
Guy's already treated as some kind of god by most metalheads, he might as well cash in on that, right?
And he is already feeble enough to become a Pope. Almost.
He does have Halford beat on that, that much is certain :P
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Well, that was John Paul II on that image, right? Doesn't look like Benedict to me...
For a truly metal pope we need Rob Halford though :P
No, we need Ozzy Osbourne.
Guy's already treated as some kind of god by most metalheads, he might as well cash in on that, right?
And he is already feeble enough to become a Pope. Almost.
He does have Halford beat on that, that much is certain :P
Imagine, what would Ozzy's commandments look like?
1. Thou Shalt Not Steal The Remote
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2. Urgh... nevermind...
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3. SHAROOOOOOOOOOON!!!!!!!!!!
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Speaking of Ozzy, I recently decided that it's a good thing that he wears those colored glasses all the time. In my opinion, his eyes are so impressive and intimidating that they should have to be revealed.
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"Look into my eyes!"
Great, now I'm reminded of Ziltoid again :P
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Wait, so Ozzy has a gaze attack?
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Wait, so Ozzy has a gaze attack?
And, according to at least one pigeon, a bite attack too.
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Wait, so Ozzy has a gaze attack?
And, according to at least one pigeon, a bite attack too.
Don't forget the bat ;)
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So yeah, apparently this is hilarity week at work. Saturday one of my co-workers had to be escorted off the premise by police because he blew up at the shift manager (like, really blew up).....over bacon.
Today, the shift manager (oddly enough, the same guy) spilled some chili on his hand because of the cutting board being loose. Now, this wasn't particularly funny because he got burned bad (at least 2nd degree, possibly 3rd, but he couldn't use his hand for the rest of the day basically), but then he filled out the accident form that we're supposed to fill out. It had the following section:
Sex: male/female/unknown.
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props to anyone who can get a third degree burn from chili
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It had been in the steamer for a really long time, so it was probably pretty close to 100 C. And at least it wasn't straight grease, but mixed in with water and other things. Oil tends to be worse than it could be. I mean nacho cheese just stays there. I get to find out how bad it really was Saturday, since I get the next two days off (finally).
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This list (http://forum.starmen.net/forum/Fan/Forum/46836) of plot hooks. It's so getting used. I would LOVE to play a game that rolled 100.
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This list (http://forum.starmen.net/forum/Fan/Forum/46836) of plot hooks. It's so getting used. I would LOVE to play a game that rolled 100.
19, 21, 23, 32, 35, 38, 39, 52, 54, 65, 72, 79, 97, and 100 are total win. :D
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This list (http://forum.starmen.net/forum/Fan/Forum/46836) of plot hooks. It's so getting used. I would LOVE to play a game that rolled 100.
19, 21, 23, 32, 35, 38, 39, 52, 54, 65, 72, 79, 97, and 100 are total win. :D
All of the hooks with the thrill-seeker lich are made of win.
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Hairdresser beats up shotgun wielding robber with kung fu. She rapes him for 3 days. (http://www.mosnews.com/society/2009/04/14/1013/)
Hairdresser turns robber into sex slave
14 Apr, 03:05 PM
A young hairdresser in Kaluga, Central Russia, locked a robber who tried to steal her money in the basement of the beauty salon. After that, she has brutally raped her hostage for three days. A court in Kaluga has filed criminal charges against both of them, the Russian website Newsru.com reports.
The robber, who has not been named, burst into the salon armed with shotgun at about 17.00 on March 14. He demanded money. There were two hairdressers and one client in the salon at the time. One of hairdressers, who was studying judo and taekwondo, disabled the robber with a smashing body blow. Then she carried the unlucky robber to the basement and bound him with a hairdryer cord.
The hairdresser told her scared colleague and the client that she would call the police. But she did not. After work, instead of calling the police, she made her hostage undress. The perverted hairdresser forced the hostage to take several Viagra tablets. She chained the unfortunate robber with pink furry wristbands and painfully raped him for the next three days.
After his release, the exhausted robber filed charges against the perverted woman. The frenulum of his penis was torn as a consequence of rape session.
“That’s ridiculous. We had sex just a couple times. I brought him brand new jeans. I fed him every day and gave him one thousand rubles ($25) before his release,” the hairdresser said.
In response, she filed charges against the robber.
The robber admitted that the hairdresser really did feed him royally.
“I actually don’t know what will happen to them. But it’s a pity that they could not meet in the cell. They would be a great couple,” one of the police officers said.
I think I've just seen Rape as Comedy in play.
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Veekie: That's fucking funny. Pun intended.
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So, does it make me a horrid person I've been laughing at that for the last 15 minutes?
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So, does it make me a horrid person I've been laughing at that for the last 15 minutes?
No. That just makes you standard issue Dictator material.
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Man, maybe there's a reason my gf and all her friends call me a nazi...
Maybe I should be pursuing politics instead....
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So, does it make me a horrid person I've been laughing at that for the last 15 minutes?
It's called appreciating irony, which is not exactly a trait of the evil.
Hairdresser turns robber into sex slave luxury prostitute
Fix'd.
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So, does it make me a horrid person I've been laughing at that for the last 15 minutes?
It's called appreciating irony, which is not exactly a trait of the evil.
Join the dark side. We have cookies.
Hairdresser turns robber into sex slave luxury prostitute
Fix'd.
I'm not sure if you're supposed to screw the prostitute until something tears though.
I showed it to my Moral Education lecturer, she loled too.
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So, does it make me a horrid person I've been laughing at that for the last 15 minutes?
It's called appreciating irony, which is not exactly a trait of the evil.
Join the dark side. We have cookies.
Hairdresser turns robber into sex slave luxury prostitute
Fix'd.
I'm not sure if you're supposed to screw the prostitute until something tears though.
I showed it to my Moral Education lecturer, she loled too.
Dude, did you forget me at the office party?
And if the prostitute doesn't tear something you're probably not getting three day's money's worth.
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"26. Dwarves threatened by serial barber."
I'm definitely using this at some point.
Also, I'm surprised the robber filed charges.
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"26. Dwarves threatened by serial barber."
I'm definitely using this at some point.
Also, I'm surprised the robber filed charges.
I'm fairly sure the ripped skin off his dick had something to do with it.
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You know, some people would pay to have that done to them. Fetishes and all that. Just throwing it out there.
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"26. Dwarves threatened by serial barber."
I'm definitely using this at some point.
Also, I'm surprised the robber filed charges.
I'm fairly sure the ripped skin off his dick had something to do with it.
Yeah, prison's gonna be merciless to him once the news gets out.
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"26. Dwarves threatened by serial barber."
I'm definitely using this at some point.
Also, I'm surprised the robber filed charges.
I'm fairly sure the ripped skin off his dick had something to do with it.
Yeah, prison's gonna be merciless to him once the news gets out.
On the plus side, technically he's the rape victim, not the rapist...
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Even worse for him, then. They know he's already got experienced in that role :)
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Beer.
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Don't f*ck with those Russian bitches. :lol
This reminds me of my favorite screen name: Distended_Pendulous_Frenulem. :D
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Few Russians around here, but I do know a few hot ones.
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Some stuff I found with StumbleUpon. All of it should be SFW, though I don't know about any other contents of the sites.
Awesome Crustacean (http://www.influks.com/post1238.html)
Pixar vs. Dreamworks (http://www.slashfilm.com/wp/wp-content/images/pixarvsdreamworks.jpg)
How to get even with someone (http://www.joke-archives.com/stress/gettingeven.html)
Drug dealers vs. software devlopers: A comparison (http://flor.nl/text/softdrugs.html)
Michael Jordan: Did you know... (http://www.johns-jokes.com/joke/of_the_day/946)
The Faces of the Earth (http://flabbergastedly.com/?p=96)
What have you done, internet? (http://twitpic.com/1rz2x)
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This is the conversation that I had with my mom tonight:
My mom: Do you know any, you know, more mainstream guys?
Me: Nope!
My mom: And why is that?
Me: I scare them away...
I proceed to tell her this wonderful little story.
I'm in the elevator at my school going up to my classroom. In this elevator there are two preppy looking guys in expensive designer crapola. Anyway, I overhear them talking (they were loud), and this one guy's all, "Man, that stupid psycho bitch! She was fucking crazy!" The second guy joins in, "Yeah, man. What's with girls these days? So fucking crazy."
At this point they both look up and notice me staring at them.
While I had both of their attention I threw up my arms and yelled: "DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!" They both jumped back, one uttering, "Oh shit!"
The elevator stops and I say in an innocent voice, "Oh! This is my floor," and walk off.
I was laughing so hard when those elevator doors closed. Man, I wish I had video-taped it. Stupid masogynistic assholes. :rollseyes
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:clap
Epic, BimR, simply epic :D
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This is the conversation that I had with my mom tonight:
My mom: Do you know any, you know, more mainstream guys?
Me: Nope!
My mom: And why is that?
Me: I scare them away...
I proceed to tell her this wonderful little story.
I'm in the elevator at my school going up to my classroom. In this elevator there are two preppy looking guys in expensive designer crapola. Anyway, I overhear them talking (they were loud), and this one guy's all, "Man, that stupid psycho bitch! She was fucking crazy!" The second guy joins in, "Yeah, man. What's with girls these days? So fucking crazy."
At this point they both look up and notice me staring at them.
While I had both of their attention I threw up my arms and yelled: "DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!" They both jumped back, one uttering, "Oh shit!"
The elevator stops and I say in an innocent voice, "Oh! This is my floor," and walk off.
I was laughing so hard when those elevator doors closed. Man, I wish I had video-taped it. Stupid masogynistic assholes. :rollseyes
I've been on the lookout for "non-mainstream" gals for a while now. As it turns out, they're funnier, more interesting, and often prettier in their own way than the "mainstream" ones.
Sadly, they also seem to be much harder to detect around here...
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*takes a bow*
I Hate Ostriches Viddy (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5XxjEtYiyoE)
My friend and ex-co-worker just sent me this vid. I HAD to post it.
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This is the conversation that I had with my mom tonight:
My mom: Do you know any, you know, more mainstream guys?
Me: Nope!
My mom: And why is that?
Me: I scare them away...
I proceed to tell her this wonderful little story.
I'm in the elevator at my school going up to my classroom. In this elevator there are two preppy looking guys in expensive designer crapola. Anyway, I overhear them talking (they were loud), and this one guy's all, "Man, that stupid psycho bitch! She was fucking crazy!" The second guy joins in, "Yeah, man. What's with girls these days? So fucking crazy."
At this point they both look up and notice me staring at them.
While I had both of their attention I threw up my arms and yelled: "DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!" They both jumped back, one uttering, "Oh shit!"
The elevator stops and I say in an innocent voice, "Oh! This is my floor," and walk off.
I was laughing so hard when those elevator doors closed. Man, I wish I had video-taped it. Stupid masogynistic assholes. :rollseyes
I've been on the lookout for "non-mainstream" gals for a while now. As it turns out, they're funnier, more interesting, and often prettier in their own way than the "mainstream" ones.
Sadly, they also seem to be much harder to detect around here...
Very true :)
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Awesome Crustacean (http://www.influks.com/post1238.html)
:twitch :hide
I sense a 70s monster movie here somewhere...
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bah pistol shimps suck, mantis shrimps ftw.
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I've been on the lookout for "non-mainstream" gals for a while now. As it turns out, they're funnier, more interesting, and often prettier in their own way than the "mainstream" ones.
Sadly, they also seem to be much harder to detect around here...
You could live over here, where women are more often than not obese, with massive entitlement issues, have loud screechy voices, and demand the world from you without giving back one whit.
You can in fact have my share, I'm leaving for greener pastures in about a year or so.
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bah pistol shimps suck, mantis shrimps ftw.
But neither are as cool as mimic octopus (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mimic_Octopus) and vampire squid (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vampire_squid) (it can cast glitterdust!).
Seriously, find some (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H8oQBYw6xxc&fmt=18) videos (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l3PvvT_Ktx8&fmt=18) of those things, they're awesome.
The anglerfish is a classic of course. What was the name of that crab with one giant claw that punches things?
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What was the name of that crab with one giant claw that punches things?
Kingler?
:P
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What was the name of that crab with one giant claw that punches things?
Kingler?
I lol'd :lmao
Also, BimR wouldn't tell me what happened last night. She said I had to read it. It's fucking hilarious.
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http://www.texassecede.com/ (http://www.texassecede.com/)
What made me laugh about this was that the Lone Star Republic wanted the United States to annex them in the first place.
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hey Prime
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D2oc6HQ3rHQ
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GRSbC6HAgNE
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http://www.texassecede.com/ (http://www.texassecede.com/)
What made me laugh about this was that the Lone Star Republic wanted the United States to annex them in the first place.
thats not so funny when you live next door to those people. I live in Louisiana.
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bah pistol shimps suck, mantis shrimps ftw.
But neither are as cool as mimic octopus (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mimic_Octopus) and vampire squid (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vampire_squid) (it can cast glitterdust!).
Seriously, find some (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H8oQBYw6xxc&fmt=18) videos (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l3PvvT_Ktx8&fmt=18) of those things, they're awesome.
The anglerfish is a classic of course. What was the name of that crab with one giant claw that punches things?
Wow... I just read the wikipedia page and watched the video of the vampire squid. That thing is freakin' awesome.
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SDK showed me this. Sex Talk with Peppy Hare (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vRIjR1Hao4Y)
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SDK showed me this. Sex Talk with Peppy Hare (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vRIjR1Hao4Y)
I didn't find it as amusing as I should have... I was enamored with that dude's cute accent. :embarrassed
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His accent sucked.
But Peppy's line at 1:23 was awesome.
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bah pistol shimps suck, mantis shrimps ftw.
But neither are as cool as mimic octopus (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mimic_Octopus) and vampire squid (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vampire_squid) (it can cast glitterdust!).
Seriously, find some (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H8oQBYw6xxc&fmt=18) videos (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l3PvvT_Ktx8&fmt=18) of those things, they're awesome.
The anglerfish is a classic of course. What was the name of that crab with one giant claw that punches things?
Wow... I just read the wikipedia page and watched the video of the vampire squid. That thing is freakin' awesome.
I dare you to stat a dire version. Also, I dare BimR to stare into its eyes.
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bah pistol shimps suck, mantis shrimps ftw.
But neither are as cool as mimic octopus (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mimic_Octopus) and vampire squid (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vampire_squid) (it can cast glitterdust!).
Seriously, find some (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H8oQBYw6xxc&fmt=18) videos (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l3PvvT_Ktx8&fmt=18) of those things, they're awesome.
The anglerfish is a classic of course. What was the name of that crab with one giant claw that punches things?
Wow... I just read the wikipedia page and watched the video of the vampire squid. That thing is freakin' awesome.
I dare you to stat a dire version. Also, I dare BimR to stare into its eyes.
Dire Vampire Squid.... :plotting and so the idea for my next critter for the spookity critters thread is beginning to form...
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More strange sea creatures: The blanket octopus (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blanket_octopus)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cpME-jNSC2U&fmt=18
Hey, it's not my fault there's so many cool things with tentacles, alright?
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Sports jerseys with misspellings. (http://www.faniq.com/blog/Washington-Nationals-Misspell-Jerseys-As-Natinals-Blog-22464) :lol
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The Sega Michael Jackson takes on the NES world.
Michael Forever (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B70NJCmtP4o) - part 1
Michael Fantasy (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ZEAC27GysI) - part 2, the best IMO
Michael Quest (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j4cam0Ji300) - part 3
NES weirdness with Kung Fu, Mega Man, and shitloads of E. Hondas (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w3mpbx0wFks&feature=related).
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The Sega Michael Jackson takes on the NES world.
Michael Forever (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B70NJCmtP4o) - part 1
Michael Fantasy (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6ZEAC27GysI) - part 2, the best IMO
Michael Quest (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j4cam0Ji300) - part 3
NES weirdness with Kung Fu, Mega Man, and shitloads of E. Hondas (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w3mpbx0wFks&feature=related).
This is good. Really good.
EDIT: And then there's THIS.
BISON!!! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IGEJDKJdPGg)
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Sir, that was amazing. "No! Elevators are too dangerous during a fire! Everybody! To the roof!"
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Sir, that was amazing. "No! Elevators are too dangerous during a fire! Everybody! To the roof!"
The sequel is even better.
Gay Sagat (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=00W42aJzPC4&feature=related)
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The Browncoats (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V9z6AO5KzIU&feature=player_embedded) are an actual band, apparently. Only one song up, but it's a great one.
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Hi Meg (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JxXt5SiCgCs) 0:)
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Hi Meg (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JxXt5SiCgCs) 0:)
Awww man, you're so fucked. You just did the two things a man should never try on a woman.
One: describe her as violent.
Two: say she's fat.
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Hi Meg (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JxXt5SiCgCs) 0:)
Awww man, you're so fucked. You just did the two things a man should never try on a woman.
One: describe her as violent.
Two: say she's fat.
See, I do that all the time, and mine likes it...
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Hi Meg
(http://i171.photobucket.com/albums/u290/brightsun07/FamilyGuy-MegLovesBrian.jpg)
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Hi Meg (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JxXt5SiCgCs) 0:)
I lol'd. But she's gonna scream like a banshee. :P
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Hi Meg (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JxXt5SiCgCs) 0:)
Awww man, you're so fucked. You just did the two things a man should never try on a woman.
One: describe her as violent.
Two: say she's fat.
Actually I was playing on her fear of whales :D
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WZpxMyoFpds&feature=related (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WZpxMyoFpds&feature=related)
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My friend in Anatomy showed this to me...
boot to the head (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vFldBVWFgWo)
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O0po1WRIIMg
nsfw
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boot to the head (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vFldBVWFgWo)
I laughed so hard. Who showed it to you?
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My friend in Anatomy showed this to me...
boot to the head (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vFldBVWFgWo)
That really made my day. :p
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My friend in Anatomy showed this to me...
boot to the head (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vFldBVWFgWo)
*cough* (http://objection.mrdictionary.net/go.php?n=3073988)
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LIkJgH6uN_c
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our weener dog does that w/ our basset hound
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Teehee, you said wiener.
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WZpxMyoFpds
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Already posted, Boz.
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My friend in Anatomy showed this to me...
boot to the head (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vFldBVWFgWo)
*cough* (http://objection.mrdictionary.net/go.php?n=3073988)
So? :P It's still funny. And definitely funnier than the overplayed objection flash ;)
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4chan screws up Time's poll (http://musicmachinery.com/2009/04/27/moot-wins-time-inc-loses/)
This morning Time.com published the final result for their annual TIME 100 Poll. Time reports that the new owner of the title ‘Worlds’s most influential person, is moot’. What TIME doesn’t say is that their poll was so totally manipulated that the results of the poll are not an indication of who is the most influential, but instead they stand as a monument to Time’s incompetence.
pollresults
Looking at the poll results we see clear evidence of the hack. The first letters of the top 21 finalists in the poll spell out ‘Marblecake, also the game’. Evidence of precision hackery for anyone to see. And yet, Time says they rebuffed all attempts to hack the poll. Quoting from the time article: “TIME.com’s technical team did detect and extinguish several attempts to hack the vote”. Which leads me to wonder whether Time.com is being dishonest or is just plain incompetent. Considering Hanlon’s razor , I have to go with incompetence. (And if you have any doubt about Time’s incompetence, take a close look at the Poll. Notice that Oprah Winfrey and Ratan Tata have the exact same number of votes. That’s because they both shared the same ID in the poll. A vote for either one was a vote for the other. Same goes for Michael Bloomberg and Gustavo Dudamel. If you vote for one, you vote for the other.)
How did the hack happen? I’ve already described in great detail the steps that the loose collective known as ‘Anonymous’ took to hack the poll. This group (that gathered on an IRC channel at anonnet.org) probed for weaknesses in the poll protocols and wrote autovoters to stuff the ballot box with votes that would put the candidates in the proper order to spell out the Message, adapting as necessary whenever Time adjusted its protocol in a meager attempt to keep the hackers out. But two weeks ago, Time got serious about poll security. They modified the poll so that you needed to prove that you were human (via a captcha) in order to vote.
290px-modern-captcha
This instantly shut down all of the autovoters. Anonymous was offline - no longer able to submit thousands of votes per minute. And what’s worse, when the autovoters were shutdown, the Message ‘Marblecake, also the game’ soon decayed into a meaningless “mablre caelakosteghamm”. It seemed that Time.com had won - the Message would not survive the next two weeks of voting. But Anonymous didn’t give up, they considered it a challenge to restore the Message. Here’s how they did it.
Update -4/29 Professor Luis von Ahn, the project lead for reCAPTCHA, sent me a very polite email suggesting that I change a few words here to make it clear to a casual reader that reCAPTCHA was not hacked. I agree that the original post could be easily misinterpreted by a casual reader, so I’ve changed a couple of words here and there to make it absolutely clear that reCAPTCHA was not compromised for the Time Poll.
First attempt - trying (and failing) to crack reCAPTCHA
The first thing Anonymous tried to do was tried to break reCAPTCHA, the captcha technology used by Time.com. They built a program that would analyze the images, break the words into characters and apply OCR to the images in an attempt to automate the captcha process. However, unsurprisingly, it proved to be too difficult of a task - certainly that was a nut that would take more than a week to crack. So after a few days, they abandoned this approach.
res4
Second Attempt: trying (and failing) to hack reCAPTCHA - ‘The Penis Flood’
The next tactic used was to see if they could find a flaw in the reCAPTCHA implementation. One thing they discovered about reCAPTCHA was that it always presents two words to a user for decoding - one word is a control word known by the reCAPTCHA system, while the other is an unknown word (reCAPTCHA uses the humans to help correct OCR errors). Wikipedia describes the process: “Scanned text is subjected to analysis by two different optical character recognition programs; in cases where the programs disagree, the questionable word is converted into a CAPTCHA. The word is displayed along with a control word already known and is labeled by the human. Those words that are consistently given a single label by human judges are recycled as control words”. 2iasdo4 What Anonymous realized was that if they always labeled the unknown scanned text with the same word - and if they did this thousands and thousands of times eventually a large percentage of the unknown words would be mislabeled with their word. All they had to do was look at the two words in the captcha, enter the proper label for the ‘easy’ one (presumably that would be the one that the two optical scanners would agree upon) and enter the word “penis” for the hard one. If they did this often enough, then soon a significant percentage of the images would be labeled as ‘penis’ and the ability to autovote would be restored (one side effect, that was not lost on Anonymous, was the notion that for years to come there would be a number of digital books with the word ‘penis’ randomly inserted throughout the text. Update: I asked Ben Maurer, chief engineer of reCAPTCHA about this ‘penis flood‘ attack, Ben says that they’ve anticipated this type of attack and they have numerous protections that will keep the penises from penetrating the reCAPTCHA barrier. Update - 4/29 - Luis von Ahn, the project lead of reCAPTCHA goes on to say ” about the “penis attack”. We serve over 400 million CAPTCHAs per week, so submitting 200k CAPTCHAS with the word penis doesn’t even come close to poisoning our database — we serve each word to multiple random users, and we require them to be correct on the other word, so to get any traction with this attack, they would have had to submit at least 100 times more CAPTCHAs. And even if they did this, we have many other measures against it. That attack simply doesn’t work.“
Third Attempt: Optimizing reCAPTCHA entry
As appealing as the notion of sprinkling the word ‘penis’ into texts, the Anonymous team knew that the clock was ticking, and if they were going to restore the Message they didn’t have time to wait for the autovoters to come back online - they were going to have to vote manually, many, many times. And so they needed to be able to enter captcha’s as fast as they could. They developed a set of guidelines that allowed them to quickly decide which reCAPTCHA words they could skip. For example:
You will be given 2 words: 1 real, 1 fake.
For [REAL FAKE] or [FAKE REAL], you can just type in REAL and it should be accepted.
If it’s [LOOKSREAL LOOKSREAL] or [LOOKSFAKE LOOKSFAKE], it’s usually just quicker to just type in both words. Don’t waste precious time deciding which one of them is real.
Use both the appearance and the type of word to identify a fake
word. Don’t rely on just one of them.
The whole ruleset is here: fake captcha
By understanding how reCAPTCHA worked - the team was able to double their productivity (since they usually only had to enter one word instead of two). To further optimize their voting they created a poll front-end that allowed you to enter votes quickly while giving you an update of the poll status (and since it is a 4chan kind of crowd, they also provided the option to stream some porn just to keep you company while you are subverting one of the largest media companies in the world.
poll-frontend
They found that with this version of the manual loader, the thing that was taking the most time was loading the captcha images, so they made a bare bones version that loaded 3 captchas at a time, in the background eliminating this bottleneck, and doubling their manual voting speed once more (and showing them vote per minute stats).
hack-fast1
Update - Just to be perfectly clear, anon didn’t hack reCAPTCHA. It did exactly what it was supposed to do. It shut down the auto voters instantly and effectively. The only option left after Time added reCAPTCHA to the poll was a brute force attack. Ben Maurer, (chief engineer on reCAPTCHA) comments on the hack: “reCAPTCHA put up a hard to break barrier that forced the attackers to spend hundreds of hours to obtain a relatively small number of votes. reCAPTCHA prevented numerous would-be attackers from engaging in an attack. In any high-profile system, it’s important to implement reCAPTCHA as part of a larger defense-in-depth strategy”. As Dr. von Ahn points out “had Time used reCAPTCHA from the beginning, this would have never happened — anon submitted *tens of millions* of votes before Time added reCAPTCHA, but they were only able to submit ~200k afterwards. And to do this, they had to resort to typing the CAPTCHAs by hand!” One thing that Time inc. did that made it much easier for the anonymous hack was to allow leave the door open for cross-site request forgeries which allowed anon to create a streamlined poll that never had to fetch data from Time.com.
Brute Force
With the streamlined manual voting process, a single, motivated voter could cast 30 votes per minute (perhaps only 20 VPM if they were watching porn). But some calculations showed that they needed about 200K votes to cast to get everyone in their proper position. If they were going to succeed they really had to organize their votes. They churned the numbers and came up with this plan:
TOTAL VOTES NEEDED 191,209
Alexander Levedev (up to 37.5) 6,541 votes
Rick Warren (more than 1,902,130) 7,255 votes
Kobe Bryant (up to 39.50) 109,174 votes
Sheikh Ahmed bin Zayed Al Nahyan (up to 35.50) 5,000 votes
Hu Jintao (up to 31.50) 19,836 votes
Elizabeth Warren (up to 27.50) 43,403 votes
With a sprinkling of help from folks on /b/, the core team of about a dozen got down to manual voting. (To get help from /b/ they put together info on how to streamline the captcha process, how to configure the browser to mask referrals, deal with proxies and provided some other (perhaps not-safe-for work incentives). Some of the most hardcore voters (I call them ‘devoters’) spent 40+ hours voting. At their peak, they were casting about 200 votes per minute (compared to the many, many thousands per minute that they could cast via autovoter before Time added the captcha).
With 200k votes to cast, they knew it would be close, and they didn’t know exactly when the polls were closing. In the final days the crew was getting demotivated. But one boost to their productivity and morale occurred when they sussed out how Time actually did the final ordering (they round the average rating to the nearest rating, and then use the total number of votes to break a tie). With this little nugget of information, they were able to redistribute how they voted, eliminating the need for about 30K of the 200K votes. They discovered a few more quirks in how Time.com ranked the candidates which allowed them to shave even more votes off the required total for a total savings of 46k votes. With these vote savings, the goal was close at hand, with their boosted morale they were able to push across the finish line.
The End Game
Finally, on Friday, Time closed the poll, but funny thing was they didn’t turn off the polling URLs, so even though you couldn’t vote through the official Time.com website, it was still possible to vote via the streamlined manual voter - and so the ballot stuffing continued. On Saturday afternoon, the message was restored, but the voting continued - as the team tried to gain a cushion of safety, should voters for other candidates mess things up at the last minute. Early morning on April 27th Time.com published the results. And there, for the whole world to see was the message, completely intact,”mARBLECAKE ALSO THE GAME”.
result
Celebrations were in order - there was cake
alsothecake
and happy faces
smiles
and a general sigh of relief from the group.
It is 12 hours after Time.com poll has been closed. The mood among Anonymous is high - the hack was completed, it is there for the world to see. Time.com behaved as expected - they refused to acknowledge the hack and the Message - but the word is out there. People are reading about the hack on 4chan, Reddit and Digg - people know that the poll was hacked and they know that Anonymous is responsible. They started with a goal and despite some rather severe setbacks were able to meet that goal
From where I sit, I really have to wonder about Time.com. They spent their time promoting and running this poll that they know (or should know) is a total farce. They give a wink and nudge to the questionable results by saying “This is an Internet poll. Doubting the results is kind of the point.” Which is just stupid. Perhaps the point should be “if you want to maintain any kind of journalistic integrity, don’t conduct online polls”.
So what’s next for Anonymous? One hacker (knowing the stereotype people have for an Anonymous hacker) says “we’re going to resume masturbating and being the total failures that we are “. When I asked Zombocom, the mastermind of the Message , if he had any message for moot - the man that they put on top of the world - Zombocom replied: ‘ “The Game” - but still, enjoy it.’
Update: A mini-interview with moot:
A friend put me in touch with moot so I could ask him about the hack. Since he’s so influential I kept my questions short and to the point. Here’s the mini-interview:
Time makes a joke a your expense (”To put the magnitude of the upset in perspective, it’s worth noting that everyone Moot beat out actually has a job. “). Any response to Time magazine about this:
I wasn’t offended by the blurb on TIME.com. To clarify, I never claimed to be unaware of the “concerted plan to influence the poll,” just that I hadn’t instructed anybody to vote for me. They did it all on their own (as you already know).
Time also indicates that they rebuffed the attempts to hack the poll. (”TIME.com’s technical team did detect and extinguish several attempts to hack the vote. “). This seems to me to be a lie. Likewise, they ignore the ‘marblecake, also the game’ message completely. Anything to say about this?
Honestly, I think Time had as much fun with the poll as we all did. It drove a lot of traffic to their site, and after the final results were released, generated a lot of buzz about the upcoming issue.
There’s a group of a dozen or so guys who’ve devoted a couple of months to this. Anything to say to them?
As for a response to the players: “Thanks.”
I loled.
-
Yeah, I saw the link at 4chan some time ago, it was hilarious. Time got owned and it makes me a happy camper.
For reference:
(http://musicmachinery.files.wordpress.com/2009/04/kg9kl.jpg)
-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LIkJgH6uN_c
sheep can be spooky
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fht4iULu0w8
-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LIkJgH6uN_c
sheep can be spooky
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fht4iULu0w8
Our resident kiwis might disagree, I think. A couple of them keep sheep as pets, if memory serves.
-
Yeah, I saw the link at 4chan some time ago, it was hilarious. Time got owned and it makes me a happy camper.
For reference:
*Snip*
GODDAMMIT!!!!
-
It was a large scale organised attack! Time's defenses were laughable though. Didn't someone notice when the votebots started?
Speaking of which, where did Obama end up on that, Tshern?
-
So apparently they had a final exam for one of my lab classes. Nobody informed me of this. First I heard of it was when they announced today that they had the grades back for everyone. For some reason, I'm not even annoyed.
Also, unrelated to the above, I heard somebody shout "Shut your mouth when you're talking to me!" while I was walking back to my dorm. I'm not exactly sure how that's supposed to work. Have we worked out telepathy yet?
-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LIkJgH6uN_c
sheep can be spooky
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fht4iULu0w8
I used to have sheep as pets too. When i was a kid we had one that hated me, i slammed a basketball on her head when she started chewing on my toes. Trust me that guy had it nice. Ours would chase me every time i got inside the fence to feed them, not bad to out run a sheep as a 6 year old, until the day she died years later.
-
Already posted, Boz.
Wow, I'm hiding things from myself now. That's interesting.
-
Already posted, Boz.
Wow, I'm hiding things from myself now. That's interesting.
*Sits down with a notebook and a pen, a big book on the table next to the chair*
Would you like to tell us about your mother?
-
Already posted, Boz.
Wow, I'm hiding things from myself now. That's interesting.
*Sits down with a notebook and a pen, a big book on the table next to the chair*
Would you like to tell us about your mother?
On second thought, what don't we know about her?
Obvious joke is obvious.
-
Norway is win for emos?
http://www.engadget.com/2009/05/01/norway-testing-country-wide-laptop-program/
-
I at least chuckle when reading the summary on crystalkeep for the Dry Lich.
"A divine caster who turned itself into a dessert based undead to gain immortality."
-
I at least chuckle when reading the summary on crystalkeep for the Dry Lich.
"A divine caster who turned itself into a dessert based undead to gain immortality."
[homer]Mmmmm, lich-y[/homer]
-
See the world as I see it!!!
Clicky! (http://www.cornify.com/)
-
That made me cringe in horror, BimR. I need to go look at boobs now :(
-
I see your cornify, BimR, and raise you one planet full of unicorns (http://www.planetunicorn.tv/)
-
Must. Go. Watch. Porn.
-
I see your cornify, BimR, and raise you one planet full of unicorns (http://www.planetunicorn.tv/)
YAY!!! :lmao
-
...WTF have you guys been smoking?
-
Must. Go. Watch. Porn.
For proper effect, make sure to use Cornify while you do.
-
GF just pointed out, that since Obama was elected, weren't we all promised unicorns?
-
Must. Go. Watch. Porn.
For proper effect, make sure to use Cornify while you do.
Don't get me wrong, uniporn has its place, but not now. :P
-
both of those sites were disappointing..
-
I found a picture of AC about to yell at me for not paying attention during a DND game...
[spoiler](http://img12.imageshack.us/img12/2277/cornify.jpg) (http://img12.imageshack.us/my.php?image=cornify.jpg)
I like it. [/spoiler]
-
Sweet Merciful Cthulhu THE GLITTER! THE GLIIIIIIIIIIITTEEEEEEEEEERRRR!!!
-
i now love cornify
(http://www.cornify.com/cornified/image_1241659769127.jpg)
*i hope the corns make this pic clear the board req's..., if not i can fix it..
-
...I've gone blind. Thank you, BimR, altpersona, I now need to go kill a man and take his eyes.
-
You can have mine, if you promise not to kill me. I don't want them anymore.
-
:lmao
You're welcome. :D
-
ty for the assist bimr.
-
So I'm tempted to cornify one of my naughty pictures of BimR... :smirk
-
So I'm tempted to cornify one of my naughty pictures of BimR... :smirk
AC, there's crime and then there's blasphemy.
-
Indeed. Just post the picture.
-
You could've seen that one coming a mile away :P
-
You could've seen that one coming a mile away :P
I'd rather be a lot closer though.
-
(http://www.brawlinthefamily.com/images/159-Security.jpg) (http://www.brawlinthefamily.com/)
-
I lol'd, Prime.
-
My girlfriend just came up with the idea of a Swine Flu Virus. That makes me happy.
-
here's somemore
[spoiler]
(http://www.cornify.com/cornified/image_1241750474617.jpg)[/spoiler]
-
(http://www.cornify.com/cornified/image_1241228090701.jpg)
-
Excellent Twilight review comparing it to Mormon propoganda. (http://stoney321.livejournal.com/317176.html)
Warning: long text is long, mildly NSFW, and other webisms as well...
-
http://www.humanistsofutah.org/2002/WhyCantIOwnACanadian_10-02.html
-
The game I just applied for. (http://www.myth-weavers.com/showthread.php?t=64407)
-
Excellent Twilight review comparing it to Mormon propoganda. (http://stoney321.livejournal.com/317176.html)
Warning: long text is long, mildly NSFW, and other webisms as well...
I have been laughing very loudly and wiping tears from my eyes while reading this. I swear, I got in trouble in the theatre when I was dragged to watch the movie for laughing through the entire movie, too. This is officially the best thing I have read in over a month.
-
The game I just applied for. (http://www.myth-weavers.com/showthread.php?t=64407)
I wish I'd found that game. I would totally be a door ninja.
-
Someone even I could outrun. (http://www.futilitycloset.com/2009/05/08/better-late/)
-
Excellent Twilight review comparing it to Mormon propoganda. (http://stoney321.livejournal.com/317176.html)
Warning: long text is long, mildly NSFW, and other webisms as well...
I just spent like an hour reading that and I can't decide if I'm about to laugh or cry.
-
A joke I just heard today.
Caution: Extreemly Racist
[spoiler]
Why do black people always have nightmares?
Answer:
[spoiler]Because the last one to have a dream got shot.[/spoiler][/spoiler]
-
A joke I just heard today.
Caution: Extreemly Racist
[spoiler]
Why do black people always have nightmares?
Answer:
[spoiler]Because the last one to have a dream got shot.[/spoiler][/spoiler]
Meh, not the worst I've heard.
-
ya, far from it.
-
Kinda related:
[spoiler]What do you call a black guy flying an airplane?[spoiler]A pilot you racist bastard.[/spoiler][/spoiler]
-
Kinda related:
[spoiler]What do you call a black guy flying an airplane?[spoiler]A pilot you racist bastard.[/spoiler][/spoiler]
:lmao
-
Kinda related:
[spoiler]What do you call a black guy flying an airplane?[spoiler]A pilot you racist bastard.[/spoiler][/spoiler]
Why does this remind me of Achmed?
-
What's the difference between acne and a Catholic Priest
[spoiler]Acne wait till your 13 before coming in your face[/spoiler]
-
Kinda related:
[spoiler]What do you call a black guy flying an airplane?[spoiler]A pilot you racist bastard.[/spoiler][/spoiler]
Why does this remind me of Achmed?
Uh, Ahmed? Which one?
-
Kinda related:
[spoiler]What do you call a black guy flying an airplane?[spoiler]A pilot you racist bastard.[/spoiler][/spoiler]
Why does this remind me of Achmed?
Uh, Ahmed? Which one?
Achmed, the Dead Terrorist. Youtube Jeff Dunham.
-
Oh, okay. For a second I thought you might know my manager. That would have been one heck of a coincidence. Since he's the one who told it to me.
-
Harvet Ismuth's 42 Essential 3rd Act Twists (http://www.dresdencodak.com/index.html)
-
10yr old twins were staying with grandma for a few days. one day they asked her, 'Grandma, what's that called when two people sleep one on top of the other?' She was a little taken aback, but she decided to tell him the truth. 'It's called sexual intercourse.' The day after they went home one of them called her, very upset,
[spoiler]'Grandma, it isn't called sexual intercourse. It's called Bunk Beds. Now we arnt allowed to share a room!"[/spoiler]
-
In short, Google Fight.
FIGHT! (http://www.googlefight.com/index.php?lang=en_GB&word1=Wizards+of+the+Coast&word2=Ham)
-
AC just HAD to show me this Japanese cookie/candy. It's called Yan Yan. It's really yummy. And it's got "great lines" printed on the cookies.
The lines include a cute hello kitty style animal face along with the animal name and a special little saying.
These sayings include:
Beetle Lucky colour: brown
Chicken kokekokko!
Whale biggesy mammal (that's not a typo)
Squirrel your best friend
Stag Beetle love it!
Sheep wool sweater
Chick lucky colour: yellow
Elephant jumbo
octopus lucky number: 8
Horse gallop away
Bat only in the night (my favorite)
-
Bat only in the night (my favorite)
+1
Besides, would rather it be a bat than a trogdor.
-
goat you are lucky today
-
http://www.theindychannel.com/news/19602434/detail.html
-
http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/4489792.stm
-
Zombie squirrels, dude. That's pretty worrisome.
-
This previous post has been deleted on account of I'm completely insane....clearly.
-
http://xkcd.com/591/
-
Awesome, Count. I found that this morning. Fucking hilarious.
-
Just after I finished my 4chan binge for this week :P
Nice :)
-
Just after I finished my 4chan binge for this week :P
Nice :)
I've always stayed away from 4chan. The way I see it, it's like the sun of the Internet. It spreads life among the other sites... but you don't want to look directly at it, and for the love of God, man, DON'T TOUCH IT!
-
It's not so bad ;)
-
It's not so bad ;)
/b/ is the place you want to stay away from.
-
It's not so bad ;)
/b/ is the place you want to stay away from.
I find it to be pretty tame actually.
Maybe it was worse back in the day, but I can't say I've ever really been shocked by it.
Could ofcourse be me being far too jaded for my own good :eh
-
http://xkcd.com/591/
:lmao
-
It's not so bad ;)
/b/ is the place you want to stay away from.
I find it to be pretty tame actually.
Maybe it was worse back in the day, but I can't say I've ever really been shocked by it.
Could ofcourse be me being far too jaded for my own good :eh
Well if you wanna be shocked I can make a few recommendations :flirt
-
have at it
-
have at it
Well I'd have to PM or email them. If I actually posted them here at the boards, Meg would hunt me down and feed me to the Pugs. :sofa
-
have at it
Well I'd have to PM or email them. If I actually posted them here at the boards, Meg would hunt me down and feed me to the Pugs. :sofa
Let's be fair, she might actually spare you if you actually gave her better links.
Incidentally, if you have any good stuff, PM it to me...
-
Define what would be "better" in this instance...
And what you mean by good stuff. One mans good stuff is another mans "Holy shit, why did you send me this abomination?"/size]
[/quote]
-
^ That conversation. :lmao
-
Becoming jaded is all part of internet adulthood. When nothing can shock you anymore, a little innocence has died inside. I go to /b/ when I'm really bored, for fun mostly.
EDIT:Also, :lmao at the comic.
-
Xkcd pwns.
The Pope vs Sex, who will win? (http://www.googlefight.com/index.php?lang=en_GB&word1=Pope&word2=Sex)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iXp2ruZoxK8
-
I go to /b/ when I'm really bored, for fun mostly.
Same here :)
So, Bhu, what did Kuro send you? A link to 'kittens'? :P
-
I go to /b/ when I'm really bored, for fun mostly.
Same here :)
So, Bhu, what did Kuro send you? A link to 'kittens'? :P
He didnt send anything, he asked me to PM him any "good" links.
I'm still waiting for that definition of good :smirk
-
Define what would be "better" in this instance...
And what you mean by good stuff. One mans good stuff is another mans "Holy shit, why did you send me this abomination?"/size]
Avoid guro, futa, yaoi, scat, piss and tentacles and very often you'll be in the clear.
Also, Sex beats God.
-
Define what would be "better" in this instance...
Avoid guro, futa, yaoi, scat, piss and tentacles and very often you'll be in the clear.
So oily fat chicks dry humping electrical appliances is a go for example? :p
-
Define what would be "better" in this instance...
Avoid guro, futa, yaoi, scat, piss and tentacles and very often you'll be in the clear.
So oily fat chicks dry humping electrical appliances is a go for example? :p
What?
-
Internet tip: Never ask bhu for clarification unless you're sure you REALLY want to know. :smirk
-
Internet tip: Never ask bhu for clarification unless you're sure you REALLY want to know. :smirk
What if you REALLY want to know?
-
Internet tip: Never ask bhu for clarification unless you're sure you REALLY want to know. :smirk
What if you REALLY want to know?
Then get ready for some mind scars :lol
-
I have ways of removing those scars.
[spoiler](http://i271.photobucket.com/albums/jj155/Reaganstorme/MotivatorBrainBleach2.jpg)[/spoiler]
-
I like to think I've gotten all the scars the internet could give me.
-
I am relatively unscarred from the internet, due to me just avoiding stuff I don't think I want to see.
-
/me is waiting...
-
"Must...resist...urge...to...PM...Count" [/Shatner]
:P
-
Don't make me throw a bookshelf at you, as recent events has shown me I can huck one pretty far.
-
Don't make me throw a bookshelf at you, as recent events has shown me I can huck one pretty far.
This made me lol. Not that I don't think you could, but just that throwing a bookcase would be amusing. :D
-
Don't worry, I'm not that cruel :)
Besides, I don't think I could dodge a bookshelf that came at me through my monitor...
:P
-
You still get reflex saves while flat-footed.
-
You still get reflex saves while flat-footed.
Yeah, but do you have evasion?
-
Great Tie (http://failblog.org/2009/03/02/tie-color-fail/)
-
/me is waiting...
Oh crap, I forgot to email you.
What is your email?
-
@altpersona .net
-
my preresponse
http://slightlywarped.com/crapfactory/curiosities/scarificationtatoo.htm (http://slightlywarped.com/crapfactory/curiosities/scarificationtatoo.htm)
this really belongs in the other thread... must see stuff..
-
OK alt I sent you one link. You'll have to look real hard for the whacked out stuff though cause their site has a pretty shitty setup.
On a more on topic note, to mess with your trekker friends:
When returning from the Star Trek movie, and they're desperate to know if it was true to the original, look pissed and say: "As a nod to their GLBT fans, Uhura has a penis."
Then leave the room in a huff and refuse to speak anymore for a bit.
Classic comedy bit.
-
man, im not digging for it, spoon feed me..
2g1c was amusing..
lemon party is my favorite way to say hi to new friends..
maggot brain is good for making people not eat sushi..
shaira + law (upside down dude, i cornified on here i think) is better w/ out the cornification...
-
my preresponse
http://slightlywarped.com/crapfactory/curiosities/scarificationtatoo.htm (http://slightlywarped.com/crapfactory/curiosities/scarificationtatoo.htm)
this really belongs in the other thread... must see stuff..
WHAT THE...
Edit: This doesn't belong anywhere... certainly not in "must see stuff"...
-
my preresponse
http://slightlywarped.com/crapfactory/curiosities/scarificationtatoo.htm (http://slightlywarped.com/crapfactory/curiosities/scarificationtatoo.htm)
this really belongs in the other thread... must see stuff..
WHAT THE...
So, who's hungry? :P
-
And you know, 'cuse I have kind of an unusual pigmentation, I briefly considered scarification as a neat alternative to tatooing, but oh how I have changed my mind. :twitch
-
Shamelessly changing topic...
The world according to americans (http://www.demonbaby.com/pics/americanworld.gif)
-
Nice :D
-
I lol'd because it's true.
-
man, im not digging for it, spoon feed me..
2g1c was amusing..
lemon party is my favorite way to say hi to new friends..
maggot brain is good for making people not eat sushi..
shaira + law (upside down dude, i cornified on here i think) is better w/ out the cornification...
I'll be going through it soon. Between peeking around for you and Kuro I found tons of dead links in the lists so it's audit time again :(
-
my preresponse
http://slightlywarped.com/crapfactory/curiosities/scarificationtatoo.htm (http://slightlywarped.com/crapfactory/curiosities/scarificationtatoo.htm)
this really belongs in the other thread... must see stuff..
WHAT THE...
So, who's hungry? :P
You guys are wussies, I've seen worse. :P
-
http://www.xkcd.com/593/
Of course it would be us. :P
-
http://www.xkcd.com/593/
Of course it would be us. :P
:lmao
-
The lead singer of Tyr is named Heri Joensen.
-
???
-
???
Pronounce it out loud as "Harry Johnson", and crawl into the gutter a little bit. You'll start laughing.
-
???
Pronounce it out loud as "Harry Johnson", and crawl into the gutter a little bit. You'll start laughing.
:lmao
Thanks :)
-
http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090605/ap_on_fe_st/us_odd_artillery_shell_scare
-
http://www.xkcd.com/593/
Of course it would be us. :P
:lmao
Encyclopedic listings of gods, demons and various monstrosities, what appears to be incomplete blueprints for spacecraft, mecha and various energy projectors, detailed spellcasting instructions, specific formulas for drawing them....
-
Pronounce it out loud as "Harry Johnson", and crawl into the gutter a little bit. You'll start laughing.
LMAO! Oh man...
Shamelessly changing topic...
The world according to americans (http://www.demonbaby.com/pics/americanworld.gif)
favorite part: SANTA!!!!
-
Pronounce it out loud as "Harry Johnson", and crawl into the gutter a little bit. You'll start laughing.
LMAO! Oh man...
Shamelessly changing topic...
The world according to americans (http://www.demonbaby.com/pics/americanworld.gif)
favorite part: SANTA!!!!
My favorite part: they grow coffee here, I think
-
My favorite is the Uninhabited part.
-
My favorite is the Uninhabited part.
Crap. I laughing so hard I'm crying: I totally didn't even notice that. I COMPLETELY skipped over it.
-
My favorite is the Uninhabited part.
Crap. I laughing so hard I'm crying: I totally didn't even notice that. I COMPLETELY skipped over it.
Exactly.... You're American.
-
My favorite is the Uninhabited part.
Crap. I laughing so hard I'm crying: I totally didn't even notice that. I COMPLETELY skipped over it.
Exactly.... You're American.
Ok, now I'm laughing.
-
You mean there's something up there?
-
No, no there isn't. Anyone who tells you different is just spreading propaganda.
I swear
-
But that's not what they say in, like, the Iraq. Probably because they don't have any maps...
-
But that's not what they say in, like, the Iraq. Probably because they don't have any maps...
I seem to recall a story of someone thinking Iraq was adjacent to Canada being posted on these boards. Can't remember who posted it, but the thread's title had something to do with Republicans and mail.
-
But that's not what they say in, like, the Iraq. Probably because they don't have any maps...
I seem to recall a story of someone thinking Iraq was adjacent to Canada being posted on these boards. Can't remember who posted it, but the thread's title had something to do with Republicans and mail.
I've seen a couple videos of those types of things before. It often involves someone being asked to find a particular country on a map and they either just blankly stare (not even honing in on the correct region) or they actually start looking on the wrong side of the map.
I think I saw the one mentioned with someone either looking for Iraq by Canada or the other way around.
It really makes you wonder about people's view of the world, and how they actually think these things work. "OMG! The Iraqi terrorists are just going to march across our undefended border!"
-
My favorite (along the same lines) is when they ask people to name a country that starts with the letter "U".
A surprising number cannot, or resort to very odd countries (Uzbekistan, Uganda), when there's the United States of America or, if they couldn't think of that, surely they could think of USA...
-
Not gonna lie, Uruguay, Uzbekistan, and Uganda are the first three that pop immediately into my head. USA is usually my fourth choice.
-
Not gonna lie, Uruguay, Uzbekistan, and Uganda are the first three that pop immediately into my head. USA is usually my fourth choice.
+1
-
Uruguay was also my first thought, which would probably be followed by Uganda. I didn't even really think of the US until it was pointed out since I tend to refer to it as simply "America" (technically incorrect, I know).
-
Shamelessly changing topic...
The world according to americans (http://www.demonbaby.com/pics/americanworld.gif)
favorite part: SANTA!!!!
My favorite part: Africa isn't even on there. :lmao
-
I would have probably picked Uzbekistan first, thanks to Borat.
"Assholes!" * buzz! *
-
I would have probably picked Uzbekistan first, thanks to Borat.
"Assholes!" * buzz! *
Wasn't he supposedly from Kazachstan? :eh
-
I wouldn't think of America starting with a "U" any more than I would say that China starts with a P, North Korea starts with a "D", Congo starts with "R", or any other proper names.
Grantes, the full names of all those countries are United States of America, People's Republic of China, Democratic People's Republic of Korea, and the Republic of Congo.
-
I would have probably picked Uzbekistan first, thanks to Borat.
"Assholes!" * buzz! *
Wasn't he supposedly from Kazachstan? :eh
One of his schicks was making fun of Uzbekhistan.
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I would have probably picked Uzbekistan first, thanks to Borat.
"Assholes!" * buzz! *
Wasn't he supposedly from Kazachstan? :eh
One of his schicks was making fun of Uzbekhistan.
Ah right, been a while since I last saw it...
-
But that's not what they say in, like, the Iraq. Probably because they don't have any maps...
I seem to recall a story of someone thinking Iraq was adjacent to Canada being posted on these boards. Can't remember who posted it, but the thread's title had something to do with Republicans and mail.
http://brilliantgameologists.com/boards/index.php?topic=1993.0
There ya go.
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http://www.xkcd.com/555/ (http://www.xkcd.com/555/)
When I was little, I used to scare my friends by going into the bathroom and screaming bloody Mary three times...because they were too scared to do it themselves. :D
This comic made me ROFL really hard. I totally could see myself doing that.
-
Doing some research on search terms for Google. In the past 24 hours, for searches involving the phrase "old people," the number 3 search was old people sex with 502 searches.
-
Doing some research on search terms for Google. In the past 24 hours, for searches involving the phrase "old people," the number 3 search was old people sex with 502 searches.
:lmao
What were 1 and 2?
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Doing some research on search terms for Google. In the past 24 hours, for searches involving the phrase "old people," the number 3 search was old people sex with 502 searches.
:lmao
What were 1 and 2?
Lemonparty much? :P
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Old people and Old people birthday jokes were 1 & 2.
Out of the top 10, though, 7 were related to naked/nude old people porn/having sex/fucking. Google will never cease to prove that the internet is for porn.
-
More google related notes:
Even with strict SafeSearch on, an image search for "tenacle monster" will give you almost exclusively porn.
Don't do an image search for "fishhook". Just... argh.
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Too late. What was so bad about that? The eyes?
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Too late. What was so bad about that? The eyes?
Yeah. It combines Eye Scream with my worst phobia, so maybe it's subjective.
-
Too late. What was so bad about that? The eyes?
Yeah. It combines Eye Scream with my worst phobia, so maybe it's subjective.
So what would that phobia be?
-
Too late. What was so bad about that? The eyes?
Yeah. It combines Eye Scream with my worst phobia, so maybe it's subjective.
So what would that phobia be?
Needles (and pointy things in general) piercing skin or body parts.
That is also why I find piercings abhorrent.
-
Too late. What was so bad about that? The eyes?
Yeah. It combines Eye Scream with my worst phobia, so maybe it's subjective.
So what would that phobia be?
Needles (and pointy things in general) piercing skin or body parts.
That is also why I find piercings abhorrent.
Blood for tests :P?
-
That's a surprisingly common phobia from what I understand. :P
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A very understandable one.
Eeek.
-
What is so supprising about not wanting to get stabbed?
-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ri3XqFzcc_k
Some parts are lame, but I lol'd a lot...
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Uruguay was also my first thought, which would probably be followed by Uganda. I didn't even really think of the US until it was pointed out since I tend to refer to it as simply "America" (technically incorrect, I know).
I usually just refer to them as "the guys with the guns".
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Roy Brown, how did you get away with this? (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=34ivDW_BU94)
The above is funnier when considered with one's mind in the gutter. There are several tiers of perversity here, though.
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What is so supprising about not wanting to get stabbed?
Nothing, really.
I used to be afraid of needles myself, but the easiest way to get over it and get the job done is to look the opposite direction when the injection is happening.
-
What is so supprising about not wanting to get stabbed?
Nothing, really.
I used to be afraid of needles myself, but the easiest way to get over it and get the job done is to look the opposite direction when the injection is happening.
Same here. I still get pretty nervous when I have to have an injection, and apparently I look so pale the nurses think I'm going to pass out, but it's nowhere near as bad as it used to be.
-
I'm not actually afraid of needles, myself, but I understand the fear.
-
Oh yeah, it's completely irrational, like my other old phobia (bees). I know that I regularly experience worse pain than a needle, or that bees usually don't sting unless provoked, I'm not allergic to them, and there's the pain comparison again, but I used to be completely adamant about not having anything to do with either of them. Nowadays, I'm...well, still not great with either of them, but I can manage.
-
Oh yeah, it's completely irrational, like my other old phobia (bees). I know that I regularly experience worse pain than a needle, or that bees usually don't sting unless provoked, I'm not allergic to them, and there's the pain comparison again, but I used to be completely adamant about not having anything to do with either of them. Nowadays, I'm...well, still not great with either of them, but I can manage.
Wasps, heights, and arachnids are my primary fears.
Wasps: Irrationally, I avoid these things like the plague. I'm not allergic, but I've never been stung before (and the thought of it actually happening is what frightens me most). If I see one, I keep my distance.
Heights: Ironically, this is caused by my own personal height. Everything seems much different when you look down at it, and it only sinks in just how high up you really are when you put it in perspective. I can't fall without nearly pissing myself in fear, and airplanes are a nightmare for me (take-off and landing only, the actual flight is rather pleasant even with turbulence). And yet, I love coasters and I've always wanted to go hang-gliding. But the feeling of my stomach leaping into my chest during a drop is what does it. That feeling makes my nerves act up and forces me into the whole "I'm gonna die!" mindset. My psychiatrist says this is what a minor phobia is.
Arachnids: I've had a habit of killing spiders since I was young. I won't let them near me unless I'm going to kill them. It started because I learned just how venomous scorpions really are first-hand (despite the fact that they are my favorite non-mythical creature, I've been afraid of them for almost 2 decades now), but even the non-poisonous spiders startle me.
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I have no real phobias per se (no irrational fear of anything) though I do tend to be quite wary of heights. I find that I'm an incredibly lucky bastard when it comes to dozens of potentially fatal situations (most common being crossing the street. Seriously, if you get run over by someone around here, expect to die of the debilitating trauma unless you're walking along with someone or an ambulance happens to come your way).
Heck, I've actually had run-ins with armed robbers before, one of which was actually packing heat (thankfully, the guy was dumb as a doorstop and he fell for the good old Bluff as a move action), and I never once got hurt in those situations. Not something I'd recommend others to do, though.
-
See, my worst fear is that my fellow Americans vote.
Granted, that's probably the fear of most of the world, but still :P
-
What is so supprising about not wanting to get stabbed?
Nothing, really.
I used to be afraid of needles myself, but the easiest way to get over it and get the job done is to look the opposite direction when the injection is happening.
I learned the best way to beat phobias of needles is to start shooting heroin.
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http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/android_girlfriend.png
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http://www.picturesforsadchildren.com/index.php?comicID=166 (http://www.picturesforsadchildren.com/index.php?comicID=166)
-
http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/android_girlfriend.png
The text which appears when you mouse over it: "Programming the sexbots to enjoy sex seemed a sensible move at the time, but we didn't realize the consequences of their developing fetishes."
-
http://imgs.xkcd.com/comics/android_girlfriend.png
:lol
-
Arachnids: I've had a habit of killing spiders since I was young. I won't let them near me unless I'm going to kill them. It started because I learned just how venomous scorpions really are first-hand (despite the fact that they are my favorite non-mythical creature, I've been afraid of them for almost 2 decades now), but even the non-poisonous spiders startle me.
I'd be scared shitless if I ever saw a non-poisonous spider. They don't exist. And fie on you for killing spiders, the deadliest spider in the world only kills 5% of the people it bites assuming no medical care. Scorpions are nothing to fuck around with though.
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Actually there are a few spiders that dont have venom. They're mimics with incredibly long jaws meant to look like antennae. They flail their victims to death. There are also spider eating spiders whose heads are mounted on tripod like necks that kill using scissor jaws.
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Actually there are a few spiders that dont have venom. They're mimics with incredibly long jaws meant to look like antennae. They flail their victims to death. There are also spider eating spiders whose heads are mounted on tripod like necks that kill using scissor jaws.
I'm going to mention the first dnd monster that popped into my mind while reading this post. "Flail Snail". 'Nuf said.
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NUz8F2xU7tc&feature=related
Im not sure if i should be happy or disappointed
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Actually there are a few spiders that dont have venom.
Source? I say that because I don't believe you.
-
i was about to agree w/ count wanting source, then i googled it..
i found a handfull..
-
Alright, I searched and I found a few. Including a weird freakish vegetarian spider that lives in Central America. I should find one and send it to BimR.
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A VEGETARIAN spider? :twitch
-
They will eat occasional ant larva as an opportunistic thing, but they feed on some weird species of acacia and supplement it with nectar.
If it wasn't such a weird plant, I'd want to breed them.
-
Source, believe it or not is the game Insecta (but I did google just to be sure). Look for Ant Mimic Jumping Spider, Suborder Labidognatha, Family Salticidae. They mimic weaver ants.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/arachnophark/3219345489/in/pool-beautiful_bugs
This one is similar
The adult males acquire jaws that are described as looking like paired samurai swords. They have to flail and stab their opponent to death quite messily.
and heres the spider assassin, made an oopsie on that one guess they do has venom
http://animal.discovery.com/news/briefs/20060213/assassinspider.html
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Alright, I searched and I found a few. Including a weird freakish vegetarian spider that lives in Central America. I should find one and send it to BimR.
LOL
I'm terrified of spiders but I might be okay with one that eats plants.
-
Found on Futility Closet:
'Twas potter, and the little brown
Did simon and schuster in the shaw;
All mosby were the ballantines,
And the womraths mcgraw.
"Beware Jovanovich, my son!
The knopfs that crown, the platts that munk!
Beware the doubleday, and shun
The grolier wagnallfunk!"
He took his putnam sword in hand,
Long time the harcourt brace he sought;
So rested he by the crowell tree
And stood awhile in thought.
And as in harper thought he stood,
Jovanovich, with eyes of flame,
Came houghton mifflin through the wood
And bowkered as it came!
Dodd mead! Dodd mead! And from his steed
His dutton sword went kennicatt!
He left it dead, and with its head
He went quadrangling back.
"And hast thou slain Jovanovich?
Come to my arms, my bantam boy!
Oh, stein and day! Giroux! McKay!"
He scribnered in his joy.
'Twas potter, and the little brown
Did simon and schuster in the shaw;
All mosby were the ballantines,
And the womraths mcgraw.
– Anonymous
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http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RbluA8ZWw80
BimR, you will LOVE this.
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OMG!!! That video was amazing!!! It made me so happy! I had Beaker on my shoulder while I watched it too. That just added to the awesomeness.
Oh, and yesterday I was evil. I called up AC and wished him a happy Father's day. His panicked "WHAT?" response was hilarious. :devil
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ya, thats wrong...
funny but wrong..
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Oh, and yesterday I was evil. I called up AC and wished him a happy Father's day. His panicked "WHAT?" response was hilarious. :devil
You did WHAT?! That's awesome...
...ly terrible.
(really though, its hilarious.)
-
It would have been funnier if I wasn't too tired to drive over there and throw her down a flight of stairs
-
My fiancee tried the same thing to me but it didn't work out as funny. I had given her a card from our 2 dogs and 3 turtles for mothers day, since we call them our children.
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It would have been funnier if I wasn't too tired to drive over there and throw her down a flight of stairs
I know it's not funny, but I don't think I would get SO pissed...
.... I would get more like "WTF!? :twitch"
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I point you guys to the latest entry in my CO diary.
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It would have been funnier if I wasn't too tired to drive over there and throw her down a flight of stairs
I know it's not funny, but I don't think I would get SO pissed...
.... I would get more like "WTF!? :twitch"
:lmao
It's a running gag that anyone she knows is willing to help with a homemade abortion if the worst happens. Whether you hit her in the gut or throw her down stairs is personal preference. :P
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they say violence is never the solution.. dosnt that depend on what the problem is...
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It would have been funnier if I wasn't too tired to drive over there and throw her down a flight of stairs
I know it's not funny, but I don't think I would get SO pissed...
.... I would get more like "WTF!? :twitch"
:lmao
It's a running gag that anyone she knows is willing to help with a homemade abortion if the worst happens. Whether you hit her in the gut or throw her down stairs is personal preference. :P
...So, you guys like inflicting pain to each other, huh?
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they say violence is never the solution.. dosnt that depend on what the problem is...
Violence isn't the answer. Violence is the question. The answer is yes.
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...So, you guys like inflicting pain to each other, huh?
More along the lines of we're not having kids. :P
That and: Violence isn't the answer. Violence is the question. The answer is yes.
-
Y'know theoretically you could've played the game back and said "But...but I had that vasectomy..."
-
Yeah, because getting her hopes up would have ended. well. ;)
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http://threepanelsoul.com/view.php?date=2009-06-23
-
Best banner ad ever. (http://awardshome.com/cannes2009/pringles/can-hands.html)
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(http://failblog.files.wordpress.com/2009/06/fail-owned-carnivore-win.jpg?w=500&h=272)
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I approve!
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I don't need a support group either... :pout
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(http://i38.photobucket.com/albums/e124/j0lt/manos.jpg)
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(http://sharkrobot.com/store/images/shirt_ninjabot_magikarp.jpg)
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Knife wielding robber beaten so badly he 'looked like he got hit by a car' and 'resembled a murder scene' by his 72 year old victim. 72 year old ex-boxer victim. (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1196479/Pictured-The-battered-bruised-face-burglar-got-wrong-72-year-old-boxer.html?ITO=1490)
Research, it be important.
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very reminicent of the gene hackman road rage incident..
about 5 years ago someone tryd raging on gene... both cars pulled over... gene whipped ass...
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http://lolthulhu.com/ (http://lolthulhu.com/)
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just found this. it made me ROFLMAO
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iEWgs6YQR9A (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iEWgs6YQR9A)
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just found this. it made me ROFLMAO
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iEWgs6YQR9A (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iEWgs6YQR9A)
Ohbytheinfinitelayersoftheabyssno!
Grah, should have known better than to click it :(
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This.
[spoiler]Use Rope would be more fitting to my predilections.
Although now that I think about it, you DO use escape artist to squeeze into tight spaces. Considering that she's medium and I'm large with the powerful build ability on top of that, I might need to put some ranks into that. (I wonder what modifier KY applies to that check?)
[/spoiler]
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Truth IS stranger than fiction: Michael Jackson's prosthetic nose is reportedly missing. (http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,534724,00.html??test=faces)
Of course, this is from Fox News, whom I trust about as much as the Sun.
-
There's also the matter of his alleged one-night stand son.
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http://electricbiscuitonline.blogspot.com/search/label/knitting
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http://electricbiscuitonline.blogspot.com/search/label/knitting
Tshern. Change your avatar to this. Right now.
(http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3064/3030521764_d23884252d.jpg)
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wow they have some nice knits.
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http://electricbiscuitonline.blogspot.com/search/label/knitting
Tshern. Change your avatar to this. Right now.
(http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3064/3030521764_d23884252d.jpg)
:lol
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That is win.
-
We have a winner here!
-
During a campaign a few days ago, this line popped up during an encounter:
"The deity you are worshiping is no longer in service. Please check your faith and try your spell again."
The exact circumstances aren't what you would think: The PC in question just did a very immoral act and shifted alignments (Faustian Pact was involved, FYI).
-
http://electricbiscuitonline.blogspot.com/search/label/knitting
Tshern. Change your avatar to this. Right now.
I actively avoid Dark Knight Returns avatars. I had to use one I really liked for a while, but now I am back to cartoon/comic options. However, I naturally saved the picture to my endless databank of Jokerism.
-
At work today......well, the noon guy was asking the manager what he should do, right after he got there, and the manager said go ahead and start doing list stuff, start with the back up of mashers. And points to where someone had already gotten the container ready for them, but didn't have time to go actually get them. Now, I was making soup at this time. He points across the pots of soup towards the sinks. The noon guy: looks in the pots.
-
The word: fuckle.
Used at appropriate times (as a noun), it can be quiet hilarious. :D
Consequently, it is now one of my favorite words.
-
What the heck does it mean?
-
If you have to ask, you are a fuckle. :P
PS: I made it up.
-
See, I've heard the word, but used as a verb.
-
I like it better as a noun. :P
Also, I started laughing when my mom left me a voice message saying that her international phone didn't work in Canada.
Apparently, the word international excludes Canada.
I find it funny merely because it reminds me of this (http://www.demonbaby.com/pics/americanworld.gif)
Also, it's really hard not to start giggling everytime I see that knit Joker. I think of Tshern as him and it's just too funny.
-
this is at work, in the parking lot. Someone was backing out, and another person almost hit them. Said person started beeping at the person backing out, and continued to lean on the horn despite he was about to hit the guy backing out, and the guy backing out was in no way about to hit him.
I screamed "That's a nice horn, we're all impressed!" from where I was standing. I made some woman standing near me crack up.
-
Also, it's really hard not to start giggling everytime I see that knit Joker. I think of Tshern as him and it's just too funny.
I assure I am a lot more ridiculous in real life.
-
Also, it's really hard not to start giggling everytime I see that knit Joker. I think of Tshern as him and it's just too funny.
I assure I am a lot more ridiculous in real life.
I was so sure she meant it was cute, and that'd be out of character for you...
-
Also, it's really hard not to start giggling everytime I see that knit Joker. I think of Tshern as him and it's just too funny.
I assure I am a lot more ridiculous in real life.
I was so sure she meant it was cute, and that'd be out of character for you...
Although I am both excessively cute and ravishingly handsome in real life.
-
For the record, Tshern, I'm so glad that you changed your icon. The one you had before, made me so sad, just because the expression on the joker's face was all pouty. It made me feel bad for him. "Aw, poor joker just can't catch a break" :bigeye
-
For the record, Tshern, I'm so glad that you changed your icon. The one you had before, made me so sad, just because the expression on the joker's face was all pouty. It made me feel bad for him. "Aw, poor joker just can't catch a break" :bigeye
To me it was one of the few hilarious avatars I've managed to pick from the animated series. Joker funniness in the series was a rare occurence indeed.
-
[spoiler](http://fc06.deviantart.com/fs46/f/2009/208/8/6/Warning_sign_143_by_hjkiddk.jpg)[/spoiler]
Edit: It may be better to just link to that. The full-sized image is capable of being a street sign. (http://hjkiddk.deviantart.com/art/Warning-sign-143-131114326)
Edit 2: This guy's entire gallery is a riot! (http://hjkiddk.deviantart.com/art/Warning-sign-115-66135602)
-
Me and AC walk into a sub shop.
AC: What do I want to eat? The ham and cheese or the Italian?
Me: You are what you eat, babes.
AC: Italian...
It made me crack up. :shrug
-
Me and AC walk into a sub shop.
AC: What do I want to eat? The ham and cheese or the Italian?
Me: You are what you eat, babes.
AC: Italian...
It made me crack up. :shrug
I see the line of thought.
-
So if he'd picked the ham and chesse, he'd be a pig?
-
So if he'd picked the ham and chesse, he'd be a pig?
I figured he'd be a cheesy ham.
-
So if he'd picked the ham and chesse, he'd be a pig?
I figured he'd be a cheesy ham.
Might say something about his RL DM-ing style, I dunno :shrug
:P
-
(http://img22.imageshack.us/img22/3992/fukoffmac.gif)
This made me LOL a bit...
-
That's one awesome gif.
-
Risada, that gif is win. :D
Might say something about his RL DM-ing style, I dunno :shrug
:P
:fu
It does. :P
On another note, this thread is at 50, so let's begin anew.