Emperor Ralph Fine Outsider (Chaotic, Evil, Native)
Hit Dice: 100d8+2500 (2950 hp)
Initiative: +10
Speed: Fly 5 ft. (1 square), Clumsy
Armor Class: 60 (+8 Size, +2 Dex, +10 Profane, Natural +30), touch 30, flat-footed 58
Base Attack/Grapple: +100/+135
Attack: Nibble +143 melee (1d2+35)
Full Attack: Nibble +143 melee (1d2+35)
Space/Reach: 1/2 ft./0 ft.
Special Attacks: Improved Grab, Incredibly Strong
Special Qualities: Dark Vision 60', Floaty, DR 30/Epic, DR 10/-, Energy Resistance 30 (Acid, Cold, Electricity, Fire, Sonic), SR 45, Fast Healing 30, Regeneration 30, Scent, Low Light Vision, Immunities
Saves: Fort +77, Ref +54, Will +57
Abilities: Str 80, Dex 14, Con 60, Int 20, Wis 20, Cha 30
Skills: Appraise+63, Bluff +69, Concentration +83, Diplomacy +68, Gather Information +68, Hide +78, Intimidate +68, Knowledge (Arcana, Dungeoneering, Geography, History, Local, Nature, Nobility, Religion, The Planes) +63, Listen +63, Move Silently +62, Search +63, Sense Motive +63, Spellcraft +63, Spot +63, Use Magic Device +68
Feats: *Adaptable Flanker, Anklebiter, Blind Fight, Combat Awareness, Combat Focus, Combat Reflexes, Deflect Arrows, Dodge, Earth's Embrace, Epic Leadership, Epic Reputation, Eyes in the Back of Your Head, Hover, Improved Combat Reflexes, Improved Initiative, Improved Scent, Improved Stunning Fist, Improved Unarmed Strike, Leadership, Legendary Commander, Master Manipulator, Mobility, Multigrab, Pain Touch, Rapid Stunning, Snatch Arrows, Spring Attack, Stunning Fist, Superior Initiative, Uncanny Scent, Vexing Flanker, Water Splitting Stone, Weakening Touch, Wingover
Environment: Any
Organization: Unique
Challenge Rating: 36
Treasure: Triple Standard
Alignment: Chaotic Evil
Advancement: 101+ HD
Level Adjustment: ---
* Feats not in the PHB or MM may be found in Complete Warrior, PHB II, and The Epic Level Handbook.
"Where's my money?"Long, long ago in the dim dark past of the Jester's Realm there was a gigantic nameless abomination of life. This towering abomination had pretensions towards godhood, and set about attempting to achieve this aim. Since the Jester appoints Lesser deities in his own realm, he was amused by the monsters chutzpah. He was less amused by all the frothing, bloody sacrifices it made in order to try to get it's desires. And so he demoted it in a sense. Stripping the creature of it's awe-inspiring size and magical power, e reduced it in form to that of a tiny hamster. He also cursed it to be unable to touch the ground fro reasons unknown.
Eventually taking the name Ralph the now enraged (but teensy) entity set about re-establishing it's kingdom, beginning as an adviser or 'power behind the throne' type of ruler. Ralph has been defeated several times, and usually manages to regain a kingdom somewhere. He's immortal after all he can afford to be patient. In the meantime he has spawned many species of magical hamster, much to his personal embarrassment.
Ralph appears as a normal hamster, albeit usually with cape and crown, floating off the ground.
Improved Grab (Ex): Emperor Ralph may make a Grapple Check without provoking an Attack of Opportunity.
Incredibly Strong (Ex): Emperor Ralph does not take Size Penalties to Combat Maneuvers such as Grappling, Trips, Bull Rushes, etc.
Floaty (Ex): As he is cursed to not touch the ground, Ralph floats in the air hovering. Absolutely no force on earth can get him closer than 6" from the ground, effectively granting him immunity to Trip Attacks, he can never be prone, and he constantly has a Feather Fall in Effect on his person.
Immunities (Ex): Ralph is immune to Ability Drain/Damage, Energy Drain, aging, Stunning, sleep and death effects, poison, paralysis, petrification, polymorph, disease, fear/morale penalties, and fatigue/exhaustion effects. He does not require food, sleep, or water.
Regeneration (Ex): Ralph's Regeneration doesn't work against damage that is both Epic and Good.
Combat: Lacking his former impressive physical armament and supernatural abilities, Ralph has had to be content with studying fighting the old fashioned way: the martial arts. He is the worlds only floating kung fu hamster. And he's not happy. Generally he prefers others to do his fighting for him, but if pressed he's a pretty mean grappler.