Author Topic: You Might Be Playing 3.5 If...  (Read 29717 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Caelic

  • Hong Kong
  • ****
  • Posts: 979
You Might Be Playing 3.5 If...
« on: September 10, 2010, 08:27:19 PM »
(Strictly for fun: a compendium of the most illogical rules oddities in 3.5.  Posted here because nobody else is going to have the same command of rules arcana.)

YOU MIGHT BE PLAYING 3.5 IF...

1. A level 20 Gnomish Expert with 23 ranks of Alchemy, 23 ranks of Knowledge (Alchemy,) and Skill Focus: Alchemy is utterly incapable of brewing a flask of acid.

PhaedrusXY

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 8022
  • Advanced Spambot
Re: You Might Be Playing 3.5 If...
« Reply #1 on: September 10, 2010, 08:29:22 PM »
2. You can dunk your friend's head in a bucket of water to cure what would have otherwise been a mortal wound.
[spoiler]
A couple of water benders, a dike, a flaming arrow, and a few barrels of blasting jelly?

Sounds like the makings of a gay porn film.
...thanks
[/spoiler]

archangel.arcanis

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 2938
    • Email
Re: You Might Be Playing 3.5 If...
« Reply #2 on: September 10, 2010, 08:37:59 PM »
3. Immunity really just means only if they don't have a certain feat/class/etc...
Clerics and Druids are like the 4 and 2 in 42. Together they are the answer to the ultimate question in D&D.
Retire the character before the DM smacks you with the Table as the book will feel totally inadequate now.-Hazren

kalaskaagathas

  • Bi-Curious George
  • ****
  • Posts: 369
  • "Seek Perfection of Character" - Gichin Funakoshi
Re: You Might Be Playing 3.5 If...
« Reply #3 on: September 10, 2010, 08:39:29 PM »
4. A monk, the second most common pugilist (after the Unarmed Swordsage), must take a -4 non-proficiency penalty when attacking with his fists.

Rebel7284

  • Grape ape
  • *****
  • Posts: 1585
Re: You Might Be Playing 3.5 If...
« Reply #4 on: September 10, 2010, 08:41:30 PM »
5. Your sneaky friend can dodge a 40 foot radius ball of fire centered on him/her.  [edit] In a totally empty, tiny room too [/edit]
« Last Edit: September 10, 2010, 08:43:57 PM by Rebel7284 »
Negative level on a chicken would make it a wight the next day.  Chicken the other wight meat. -borg286

PhaedrusXY

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 8022
  • Advanced Spambot
Re: You Might Be Playing 3.5 If...
« Reply #5 on: September 10, 2010, 08:44:49 PM »
5. Your sneaky friend can dodge a 40 foot radius ball of fire centered on him/her.  [edit] In a totally empty, tiny room too [/edit]
While sleeping.  :D
[spoiler]
A couple of water benders, a dike, a flaming arrow, and a few barrels of blasting jelly?

Sounds like the makings of a gay porn film.
...thanks
[/spoiler]

Rebel7284

  • Grape ape
  • *****
  • Posts: 1585
Re: You Might Be Playing 3.5 If...
« Reply #6 on: September 10, 2010, 08:47:09 PM »
5. Your sneaky friend can dodge a 40 foot radius ball of fire centered on him/her.  [edit] In a totally empty, tiny room too [/edit]
While sleeping.  :D

Nope, sleeping = helpless.  Evasion specifies the rogue can't be helpless.
Negative level on a chicken would make it a wight the next day.  Chicken the other wight meat. -borg286

PhaedrusXY

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 8022
  • Advanced Spambot
Re: You Might Be Playing 3.5 If...
« Reply #7 on: September 10, 2010, 08:52:17 PM »
5. Your sneaky friend can dodge a 40 foot radius ball of fire centered on him/her.  [edit] In a totally empty, tiny room too [/edit]
While sleeping.  :D

Nope, sleeping = helpless.  Evasion specifies the rogue can't be helpless.
Interesting... So they still get a saving throw, but it doesn't benefit from Evasion?
[spoiler]
A couple of water benders, a dike, a flaming arrow, and a few barrels of blasting jelly?

Sounds like the makings of a gay porn film.
...thanks
[/spoiler]

jameswilliamogle

  • Hong Kong
  • ****
  • Posts: 1279
    • Email
Re: You Might Be Playing 3.5 If...
« Reply #8 on: September 10, 2010, 08:53:26 PM »
6. The Divine Metamagic War Cleric sees you playing a Whispergnome Spellthief and decries "BROKEN!".

lianightdemon

  • Barbary Macaque at the Rock of Gibraltar
  • ***
  • Posts: 196
Re: You Might Be Playing 3.5 If...
« Reply #9 on: September 10, 2010, 08:57:05 PM »
Then the GM cries "metagaming" and drops a temple on both characters

AlcariTheMad

  • Ring-Tailed Lemur
  • **
  • Posts: 16
    • Email
Re: You Might Be Playing 3.5 If...
« Reply #10 on: September 10, 2010, 10:06:31 PM »
7.  Your gnomish artificer reduces the cost of magic items he creates by binding colossal elemental whales to them.

Prime32

  • Administrator
  • Organ Grinder
  • *
  • Posts: 7534
  • Modding since 03/12/10
Re: You Might Be Playing 3.5 If...
« Reply #11 on: September 10, 2010, 10:16:19 PM »
7.  Your gnomish artificer reduces the cost of magic items he creates by binding colossal elemental whales to them.
That actually makes sense though. There's got to be a lot of power in those things.
My work
The tier system in a nutshell:
[spoiler]Tier 6: A cartographer.
Tier 5: An expert cartographer or a decent marksman.
Tier 4: An expert marksman.
Tier 3: An expert marksman, cartographer and chef who can tie strong knots and is trained in hostage negotiation or a marksman so good he can shoot down every bullet fired by a minigun while armed with a rusted single-shot pistol that veers to the left.
Tier 2: Someone with teleportation, mind control, time manipulation, intangibility, the ability to turn into an exact duplicate of anything, or the ability to see into the future with perfect accuracy.
Tier 1: Someone with teleportation, mind control, time manipulation, intangibility, the ability to turn into an exact duplicate of anything and the ability to see into the future with perfect accuracy.[/spoiler]

Agita

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 5465
  • SFT is mai waifu.
Re: You Might Be Playing 3.5 If...
« Reply #12 on: September 10, 2010, 10:16:29 PM »
8. ...You can retroactively turn those years of elementary school into a PhD in theoretical physics.
« Last Edit: September 10, 2010, 10:36:50 PM by Agita »
It's all about vision and making reality conform to your vision. By dropping a fucking house on it.

Agita's Awesome Poster Compilation
Lycanthromancer's Awesome Poster Compilation

Widow

  • Bi-Curious George
  • ****
  • Posts: 469
Re: You Might Be Playing 3.5 If...
« Reply #13 on: September 10, 2010, 10:34:16 PM »
When a beautiful lass is transformed into a large green troll (War)and that is a good thing.

Trust me, when my wife does it in real life, not so good... :o

AlcariTheMad

  • Ring-Tailed Lemur
  • **
  • Posts: 16
    • Email
Re: You Might Be Playing 3.5 If...
« Reply #14 on: September 10, 2010, 10:35:57 PM »
7.  Your gnomish artificer reduces the cost of magic items he creates by binding colossal elemental whales to them.
That actually makes sense though. There's got to be a lot of power in those things.
That makes sense until you bind one INSIDE a dagger intended for a pixie.

Bozwevial

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 4497
  • Developing a relaxed attitude to danger.
Re: You Might Be Playing 3.5 If...
« Reply #15 on: September 10, 2010, 10:55:03 PM »
9. The economy runs solely on salt and 10-foot poles.

AlcariTheMad

  • Ring-Tailed Lemur
  • **
  • Posts: 16
    • Email
Re: You Might Be Playing 3.5 If...
« Reply #16 on: September 10, 2010, 10:56:26 PM »
9. The economy runs solely on salt and 10-foot poles.

Don't forget the 10-foot ladders they make 10-foot poles out of.

idontmuchcareforit

  • Ring-Tailed Lemur
  • **
  • Posts: 57
    • Email
Re: You Might Be Playing 3.5 If...
« Reply #17 on: September 10, 2010, 11:04:01 PM »
10.  A well built level 20 character can obliterate an army of poorly built level 20 characters.

Bastian

  • Bi-Curious George
  • ****
  • Posts: 540
Re: You Might Be Playing 3.5 If...
« Reply #18 on: September 10, 2010, 11:06:07 PM »
7.  Your gnomish artificer reduces the cost of magic items he creates by binding colossal elemental whales to them.
That actually makes sense though. There's got to be a lot of power in those things.
That makes sense until you bind one INSIDE a dagger intended for a pixie.
Not really, they are not physically stored in the item. They are stored in some form of magical matrix. That's like saying magic doesn't make sense because it's magic.

The_Mad_Linguist

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 8780
  • Simulated Thing
Re: You Might Be Playing 3.5 If...
« Reply #19 on: September 10, 2010, 11:12:50 PM »
11. You've trained at martial arts for over a century, but combat-wise death is still a step up.
Linguist, Mad, Unique, none of these things am I
My custom class: The Priest of the Unseen Host
Planetouched Handbook
Want to improve your character?  Then die.