WOW
how could i have missed that?
its even called Undead Meldshaper and its the first thing on page 37!!
now that is something i can work with i guess
does that also work with the preq. of the incarnum feats?
as you might already found out by yourself i want to take shape soulmeld girallon arms and bonus essentia
RAW, no. It doesn't. Really, undead and incarnum just don't mix, even with that feat.
What I might suggest, though, is possibly getting into Master of 9 to finish out your build. You get Improved Unarmed Strike for free twice (Monk and Unarmed Swordsage). If you can, get one of them Dark Chaos Feat Shuffled to something useful (Improved Initiative is always nice). Adaptive Style is a feat you should take anyway, so you really only have two feats to spend on Master of 9 (Expeditious/Desert Wind Dodge and Blind-fight). Let's face it, nobody grabs Dodge if they don't absolutely have to.
The reason I suggest this is because the PrC's advance Initiator level for all of your classes fully (so you could have 9th level manuvers as a Crusader). Failing that, take more Eternal Blade with maybe one more level in Swordsage (depends how your DM rules AC bous stacking)..