Once again,
Hood has you covered. Ever consider Battle Jumping with that lovely beard of yours?
Also, Hood has the Wrathful Healing stats.
Wrathful Healing Enchant (Enemies & Allies 20):
+3This beautiful enchant is hidden in an otherwise crappy 3.0 book in a sidebar. Wrathful Healing heals you for half the damage you deal with it, not to exceed your max HP. Ho. Lee. Crap.
Note that this healing is positive energy. A living wielder is healed, an undead wielder is harmed, and a construct is probably unaffected.
Creating a Wrathful Healing weapon requires caster level 15,
regenerate, and
Craft Magic Arms and Armor. Good luck getting a DM to allow one.