Author Topic: Do we have a dirty trick handbook?  (Read 268697 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

JaronK

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 4039
Re: Do we have a dirty trick handbook?
« Reply #100 on: October 21, 2008, 07:10:15 PM »
Yeah, it's not the DC, it's just the size.

I think there must be some better way than reading a scroll, which seems very difficult to me.  Getting a War Weaver Cohort would help, as they could cast Enlarge Person on you without touching you.  Also, if you diplomancer the guy first, he'll be a fanatic and then just let you do it to him.

JaronK

Agita

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 5465
  • SFT is mai waifu.
Re: Do we have a dirty trick handbook?
« Reply #101 on: October 21, 2008, 07:21:32 PM »
Yeah, it's not the DC, it's just the size.

I think there must be some better way than reading a scroll, which seems very difficult to me.  Getting a War Weaver Cohort would help, as they could cast Enlarge Person on you without touching you.  Also, if you diplomancer the guy first, he'll be a fanatic and then just let you do it to him.

JaronK
Or one could use the Factotum's Arcane Dilletante to mimic Enlarge Person. There ya go. (Still Spelling it may be necessary)
It's all about vision and making reality conform to your vision. By dropping a fucking house on it.

Agita's Awesome Poster Compilation
Lycanthromancer's Awesome Poster Compilation

ZeroSum

  • Bi-Curious George
  • ****
  • Posts: 372
Re: Do we have a dirty trick handbook?
« Reply #102 on: October 21, 2008, 07:23:24 PM »
We just want Enlarge Person, right...  So why not put it in a potion then get the feat that lets you quaff a potion and delay it's effect for up to one hour (per Con mod?)  Drink the potion, dive into the colon, release the potion's effect.

JaronK

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 4039
Re: Do we have a dirty trick handbook?
« Reply #103 on: October 21, 2008, 07:27:58 PM »
No, the Factotum thing looks easiest, since we've got that anyway!

So yeah, I'd go with Factotum/Bard/Exemplar to pull off this trick.

JaronK

Kuroimaken

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 6733
Re: Do we have a dirty trick handbook?
« Reply #104 on: October 21, 2008, 07:44:03 PM »
Quote
KEEP YOUR SCIENCE OUTTA MY FANTASY, DAMMIT!  Ahem.

...You have a fantasy about entering someone's ass with your entire body, lighting a torch up their colons and reading silly words to make them explode?

Dude. You've got sicker fantasies than AC...
Gendou Ikari is basically Gregory House in Kaminashades. This is FACT.

For proof, look here:

http://www.layoutjelly.com/image_27/gendo_ikari/

[SPOILER]
Which Final Fantasy Character Are You?
Final Fantasy 7
My Unitarian Jihad Name is: Brother Katana of Enlightenment.
Get yours.[/SPOILER]

I HAVE BROKEN THE 69 INTERNETS BARRIER!


InnaBinder

  • Grape ape
  • *****
  • Posts: 1610
  • OnnaTable
    • Okay - - Your Turn: Monte Cook's Message Board
Re: Do we have a dirty trick handbook?
« Reply #105 on: October 21, 2008, 07:47:16 PM »
 
Quote
Quote
KEEP YOUR SCIENCE OUTTA MY FANTASY, DAMMIT!  Ahem.

...You have a fantasy about entering someone's ass with your entire body, lighting a torch up their colons and reading silly words to make them explode?

Dude. You've got sicker fantasies than AC...
:cc you have no idea.....  :smirk
Winning an argument on the internet is like winning in the Special Olympics.  You won, but you're still retarded.

I made a Handbook!?

Agita

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 5465
  • SFT is mai waifu.
Re: Do we have a dirty trick handbook?
« Reply #106 on: October 21, 2008, 07:51:04 PM »
Quote
Quote
KEEP YOUR SCIENCE OUTTA MY FANTASY, DAMMIT!  Ahem.

...You have a fantasy about entering someone's ass with your entire body, lighting a torch up their colons and reading silly words to make them explode?

Dude. You've got sicker fantasies than AC...
:cc you have no idea.....  :smirk
Is that an implied tentacle fetish? ;)
It's all about vision and making reality conform to your vision. By dropping a fucking house on it.

Agita's Awesome Poster Compilation
Lycanthromancer's Awesome Poster Compilation

InnaBinder

  • Grape ape
  • *****
  • Posts: 1610
  • OnnaTable
    • Okay - - Your Turn: Monte Cook's Message Board
Re: Do we have a dirty trick handbook?
« Reply #107 on: October 21, 2008, 07:52:04 PM »
it's a lack of devil emoticon, or a failed spot check on my part.
Winning an argument on the internet is like winning in the Special Olympics.  You won, but you're still retarded.

I made a Handbook!?

Vidar

  • Barbary Macaque at the Rock of Gibraltar
  • ***
  • Posts: 184
    • Email
Re: Do we have a dirty trick handbook?
« Reply #108 on: October 21, 2008, 08:12:48 PM »
it's a lack of devil emoticon, or a failed spot check on my part.
You failed to see mindflayers beheading you and planting their seed in your neck?

Kuroimaken

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 6733
Re: Do we have a dirty trick handbook?
« Reply #109 on: October 21, 2008, 08:15:20 PM »
Quote
you have no idea..... 

I find tentacle sex to be pretty tame next to colostomizing someone with your entire body then making them explode, but maybe it's just my tolerance to weirdness being high.
Gendou Ikari is basically Gregory House in Kaminashades. This is FACT.

For proof, look here:

http://www.layoutjelly.com/image_27/gendo_ikari/

[SPOILER]
Which Final Fantasy Character Are You?
Final Fantasy 7
My Unitarian Jihad Name is: Brother Katana of Enlightenment.
Get yours.[/SPOILER]

I HAVE BROKEN THE 69 INTERNETS BARRIER!


Tshern

  • Clown Prince of Crime
  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 5726
  • Aistii valoa auttavasti
    • Email
Re: Do we have a dirty trick handbook?
« Reply #110 on: October 21, 2008, 08:19:20 PM »
Depends on the tenctacles.

Handy Links

Vidar

  • Barbary Macaque at the Rock of Gibraltar
  • ***
  • Posts: 184
    • Email
Re: Do we have a dirty trick handbook?
« Reply #111 on: October 21, 2008, 08:34:50 PM »
Question about the exemplar ability: problem number one. There's been said here that crawling up unto one's colon would require some amount of sneaking. Yet the ability of the exemplar states that you must be observed by npc's. So maybe you don't need the victim/chosen one(just a matter of perspective, right?)'s attention, but that'd be pretty weird if people were watching you while the object of your interest couldn't notice you.

"the demonstration must be nonthreatening and intended to entertain and amuse the onlookers". Oi, this is a VERY long shot. Nonthreatening? Maybe for them, but I don't think that's what's intended. Intended to entertain and amuse onlookers? Maybe too, but not as prime directive.
 
Admittedly, the coolest thing that I want to be able to do has no need for diplomacy, and thus no need for the exemplar, but still, I thought I'd like to discuss it.

Kuroimaken

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 6733
Re: Do we have a dirty trick handbook?
« Reply #112 on: October 21, 2008, 11:40:25 PM »
Quote
There's been said here that crawling up unto one's colon would require some amount of sneaking. Yet the ability of the exemplar states that you must be observed by npc's. So maybe you don't need the victim/chosen one(just a matter of perspective, right?)'s attention, but that'd be pretty weird if people were watching you while the object of your interest couldn't notice you.

*Checks books* Nope, no need of that. Carrying on.
Quote
"the demonstration must be nonthreatening and intended to entertain and amuse the onlookers". Oi, this is a VERY long shot. Nonthreatening? Maybe for them, but I don't think that's what's intended. Intended to entertain and amuse onlookers? Maybe too, but not as prime directive.

The demonstration itself consists of crawling up someone's ass, NOT bursting out. The bursting out is for the lols.
Gendou Ikari is basically Gregory House in Kaminashades. This is FACT.

For proof, look here:

http://www.layoutjelly.com/image_27/gendo_ikari/

[SPOILER]
Which Final Fantasy Character Are You?
Final Fantasy 7
My Unitarian Jihad Name is: Brother Katana of Enlightenment.
Get yours.[/SPOILER]

I HAVE BROKEN THE 69 INTERNETS BARRIER!


Vidar

  • Barbary Macaque at the Rock of Gibraltar
  • ***
  • Posts: 184
    • Email
Re: Do we have a dirty trick handbook?
« Reply #113 on: October 22, 2008, 09:37:04 AM »
Quote
"the demonstration must be nonthreatening and intended to entertain and amuse the onlookers". Oi, this is a VERY long shot. Nonthreatening? Maybe for them, but I don't think that's what's intended. Intended to entertain and amuse onlookers? Maybe too, but not as prime directive.

The demonstration itself consists of crawling up someone's ass, NOT bursting out. The bursting out is for the lols.

So, if David Blane or some other guy like that comes up to you and says: dude, I know a trick which I'm gonna perform before you all and you will be my assistant. Now drop the pants and I'm gonna put my whole body in your colon for the following minute. Then you'll perceive this as "nonthreatening"? :P
Even then, how could you do this with a BBEG himself?

Kuroimaken

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 6733
Re: Do we have a dirty trick handbook?
« Reply #114 on: October 22, 2008, 10:22:21 AM »
Quote
So, if David Blane or some other guy like that comes up to you and says: dude, I know a trick which I'm gonna perform before you all and you will be my assistant. Now drop the pants and I'm gonna put my whole body in your colon for the following minute. Then you'll perceive this as "nonthreatening"?
Even then, how could you do this with a BBEG himself?

Where does it say you have to tell them what the trick is?  :smirk

It's not a combat trick, though. Takes too long to work that way.
Gendou Ikari is basically Gregory House in Kaminashades. This is FACT.

For proof, look here:

http://www.layoutjelly.com/image_27/gendo_ikari/

[SPOILER]
Which Final Fantasy Character Are You?
Final Fantasy 7
My Unitarian Jihad Name is: Brother Katana of Enlightenment.
Get yours.[/SPOILER]

I HAVE BROKEN THE 69 INTERNETS BARRIER!


JaronK

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 4039
Re: Do we have a dirty trick handbook?
« Reply #115 on: October 22, 2008, 12:58:04 PM »
Considering you might also have a super high diplomacy anyway, maybe you could diplomancer the target the old fashioned way first.

Then he'll totally believe you when you say you're going to do a magic trick.  Look, disappearing act!

JaronK

Vidar

  • Barbary Macaque at the Rock of Gibraltar
  • ***
  • Posts: 184
    • Email
Re: Do we have a dirty trick handbook?
« Reply #116 on: October 22, 2008, 01:10:13 PM »
But the main idea is, you have to make people want to allow you to take of their pants, go near their bum and squeeze your way in.  :-\ I don't know any DM who's gonna say: "Oh ok, you rolled plenty on your diplomacy, have your way." Which makes me sad :'(

JaronK

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 4039
Re: Do we have a dirty trick handbook?
« Reply #117 on: October 22, 2008, 01:20:22 PM »
I don't know of a DM who would let you do most of this stuff anyway!  So that's not a problem!  By RAW if you get them to Fanatic they'll let you do anything, so it works by RAW, and since DMs are supposed to stop you from doing horribly dirty tricks, it's the same as everything else in this thread.

JaronK

Kuroimaken

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 6733
Re: Do we have a dirty trick handbook?
« Reply #118 on: October 22, 2008, 01:21:07 PM »
Quote
But the main idea is, you have to make people want to allow you to take of their pants, go near their bum and squeeze your way in.  Undecided I don't know any DM who's gonna say: "Oh ok, you rolled plenty on your diplomacy, have your way." Which makes me sad Cry

I don't think any of the tricks here would be DM-approved, but anyway.

1) Use a dagger.
2) Cut up the pants (especifically, at the height of the asshole).
3) Roll a Move Silently check.
4) Enter your poor victim's ass.
5) ???
6) Profit!
Gendou Ikari is basically Gregory House in Kaminashades. This is FACT.

For proof, look here:

http://www.layoutjelly.com/image_27/gendo_ikari/

[SPOILER]
Which Final Fantasy Character Are You?
Final Fantasy 7
My Unitarian Jihad Name is: Brother Katana of Enlightenment.
Get yours.[/SPOILER]

I HAVE BROKEN THE 69 INTERNETS BARRIER!


Vidar

  • Barbary Macaque at the Rock of Gibraltar
  • ***
  • Posts: 184
    • Email
Re: Do we have a dirty trick handbook?
« Reply #119 on: October 22, 2008, 01:26:00 PM »
Allrighty, the thing is, I know a guy who thinks he's a great dm, but doesn't know shit about the rules (sure, he's a great storyteller, but he just thinks he gets "d&d" if he knows that making a check requires a d20, and even then he makes up condition check with all sorts of dice).
 He thinks I'm the cheesiest thing ever, eventhough I decided to hold back most of the things he wouldn't understand anyway. When that still didn't work out, I decided that when I play again in the near future, I'd like to fuck as many things up as possible, hence me trying to figure out this stuff.