Author Topic: Wish Granted! (Read 148200 times)

TheWordSlinger · « **Reply #900 on:** October 08, 2008, 08:27:10 PM »

Wish granted, however you slowly starve to death as part of the rugification process was removal of your teeth.

I wish for heat immunity.

emissary666 · « **Reply #901 on:** October 08, 2008, 09:29:52 PM »

Wish granted; you are locked in a freezer

IWISHIWASN'TUSINGCAPSLOCK

BobismyRhino · « **Reply #902 on:** October 08, 2008, 09:35:36 PM »

Wish granted. I sick my bird on your computer keyboard. He pulls off all of the buttons one by one, and then craps on it. There's no salvaging it, trust me.

I wish my bird didn't like destroying computers.

Vas · « **Reply #903 on:** October 08, 2008, 10:30:59 PM »

Wish granted! Your bird turns into a Kea and starts systematically ripping apart every other thing you own or hold dear.

I wish for equal rights and equality throughout the world (heh heh)

Elennsar · « **Reply #904 on:** October 08, 2008, 10:59:18 PM »

Wish granted! However, you are then killed by a priest using a combination of holy water and horse piss (don't ask).

I wish that I wasn't busy right now.

Vynar · « **Reply #905 on:** October 09, 2008, 03:49:31 AM »

Granted! You are locked in a pitch black cell for solitary confinement with nothing to do until you die.

I wish that Chemus's werecougar form was attractive older woman instead of the cat.

Elennsar · « **Reply #906 on:** October 09, 2008, 03:51:56 AM »

Wish granted! Unfortunately, you find yourself to be blind.

I wish that prisoners on death row played D&D.

Chemus · « **Reply #907 on:** October 09, 2008, 04:01:06 AM »

Quote from: Vynar on October 09, 2008, 03:49:31 AM

...I wish that Chemus's werecougar form was attractive older woman instead of the cat.

(LOL!!1!)

Wish Granted! I gained the ability to turn from moderately young man into a 'cougar' who was then shot and made into a rug, with teeth removed, and became a vampire. I looked a lot like your mother, and the rug you made of me was very disturbing to her. When I became a vampire, I tried desperately to drink your blood, but only managed to distort your facial features in my attempts to quench my thirst for blood.

I wish I'd thought of the alternate definition of cougar that Vynar recalled.

(Damn! I suck at typing fast. Ninja'd again)

Wish Granted, Elennsar! All D&D players are now on death row.

I wish that I were a faster typist.

Elennsar · « **Reply #908 on:** October 09, 2008, 04:21:37 AM »

Wish granted! Unfortunately, ever post you make has horrible typos which take as long as your posts did before the wish to find and correct.

I wish that it wasn't quite as funny for my previous wish to be granted.

Vynar · « **Reply #909 on:** October 09, 2008, 04:39:08 AM »

Penny arcade is kind of hit or miss for me but I just remembered this comic which is on topic: http://www.penny-arcade.com/comic/2008/8/29/

Granted! Unfortunately, you had been hired as a stand up comedian. You fail horribly and are the laughing stock of the internet.

I wish that when bitten by batman you become the werebatman with added laser vision.

Elennsar · « **Reply #910 on:** October 09, 2008, 04:53:39 AM »

Wish granted! You are also killed by a priest using holy water and horse piss.

I wish that I could convince people that playing role playing games is good for their mental health.

RobbyPants · « **Reply #911 on:** October 09, 2008, 09:58:13 AM »

Wish granted. Everyone decides they'd rather have poor mental health and decides not to play.

I wish it didn't snow so much here.

Vas · « **Reply #912 on:** October 09, 2008, 10:32:53 AM »

Wish granted, yet snow becomes the newest currency, and you miss out on a crapload of wealth

I wish I could throw a javelin 600 feet

Elennsar · « **Reply #913 on:** October 09, 2008, 10:51:36 AM »

...it is -very- wrong of me to delight at D&D not being played anymore because of my wish, isn't it? Um, anyway.

Wish granted! Unfortunately, the first time you do so, you kill the Pope. And are crushed by the stampede of people who wish to hug you.

I wish that the Pope was an alien with psionic powers.

RobbyPants · « **Reply #914 on:** October 09, 2008, 11:14:06 AM »

Wish granted. He uses his psionic powers to convert all to his alien belief system, and... uh... yeah.

I wish I had a parrot that I trained to swear.

Vynar · « **Reply #915 on:** October 09, 2008, 12:14:47 PM »

Granted! He swears to tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. You are convicted in court.

I wish FDR was wasted during his fireside chats.

RobbyPants · « **Reply #916 on:** October 09, 2008, 08:40:25 PM »

Granted. The president gives his well-remembered speech "The only thing we have to fear, is a crippling, decade-long depression.*" The world is ruined in riots as people panic.

I wish I had a beer mug that was always cold and frosty, and I also wish for lots of beer.

*stolen from the Onion. Also, another notable article: "FDR's Fireside Chat Just a Stream of Cusswords"

Elennsar · « **Reply #917 on:** October 09, 2008, 08:41:21 PM »

Wish granted. Your mug is full of holes.

I wish that I was a high priest of the Pope's alien cult.

Vynar · « **Reply #918 on:** October 10, 2008, 10:51:00 AM »

Granted! Welcome to your new position in Britney Spear's latest project Pope's Alien Cult!

I wish that a large group of pirates had by far the most powerful navy in the world!

Elennsar · « **Reply #919 on:** October 10, 2008, 10:52:43 AM »

Wish granted! Unfortunately, they're software pirates, so whenever they go to sea, they get seasick.

I wish that I knew if Britney Spears being abreviated to BS means anything.

News:

Author Topic: Wish Granted! (Read 148200 times)