Wish Granted!

[AfterCrescent]

Wish granted. You have a brand new 2" plastic toy pony (of doom).


I wish I didn't have to pay to download the cool games on my PS3

[Nox_Noctis]

Wish Granted! You don't. You can choose to or choose not to of your own volition (like always - that didn't even require a wish). Choosing not to pay, of course, means you typically cannot download the game, however, so that kind of sucks.

I wish for MENERGY!

[AfterCrescent]

Wish Granted. And now everyone knows you brought this here. Their wrath shall be swift and merciless.


I wish I had some twizzlers... mmmm... yummmy twizzlers...

[Optimator]

Wish Granted.  There past their prime and are a little hard.  You probably still find them enjoyable though.

I wish health insurance companies didn't run the fucking country.

[Stratovarius]

The pony causes havoc wherever it goes. It soon eats itself so large it cannot move without a forklift.

I wish for a good book.

[Nox_Noctis]

Wish Granted.  There past their prime and are a little hard.  You probably still find them enjoyable though.

I wish health insurance companies didn't run the fucking country.

First, Strat, I totally had to minus a Gameology-Fu for that, sorry. The pony was a while ago. >_>

Wish Granted! They are replaced by ruthless Space Invaders (c) who demand "quarters, a million allowances worth of quarters!" Oh, and they also kill you, your friends, and your family. Oddly enough, they spare everyone else and leave, forgetting entirely about the quarters.

I wish to be a "WIZARD!"

[pfooti]

I wish to be a "WIZARD!"

Wish granted! A bunch of nerdy phone company employees trap you and make you ride around inside an airbrushed painting on the side of their van.

I wish for the ability to fly.

[Stratovarius]

You are granted the ability to fly, just as well as bricks don't.

I wish for my tentacle beast back.

[AfterCrescent]

Wish granted. Your tentacle beast has been reincarnated into the form of a....*drum roll* plastic spoon.

I wish I could sleep for 30 hours straight without any negative side effects or twists.

[Nox_Noctis]

Wish Granted! While your side is fine and you are not contorted in the least, it seems your head has split open when you began sleep-walking and fell off a cliff, causing irreparable damage in the form of death. Everyone tried to wake you, but thirty hours was not up...

I wish to star in Sin City II.


pfooti, thanks for getting the reference.

[Smudgy]

Wish granted! You are the star of the film! The box office ranks up to a sum of $32. You fall into a pit of poverty and obscurity, and no one will talk to you because the movie was so terrible.

I wish I was an orangutan.

[skydragonknight]

Wish granted! You are the star of the film! The box office ranks up to a sum of $32. You fall into a pit of poverty and obscurity, and no one will talk to you because the movie was so terrible.

I wish I was an orangutan.

Wish Granted! You were an orangutan until the CR 90 monster truck stepped on you. Now you're a splat.

I wish that this sentence is a lie.

[mace_of_sauron]

I wish that this sentence is a lie.

Granted, however the wish accomplished nothing and you wasted one of your 9th level spell slots, and your patron diety is angry for wasting his time and smites you.

I wish for the collapse of timespace, leading to a backward decent into oblivion. 

[Stratovarius]

Your wish is granted. However, only your relative, personal universe collapses. It sucks for you, but the rest of us are fine.

I wish to be a famous (and living) novelist.

[pfooti]

Wish granted! You're really, really, really popular in Liechtenstein.

I wish for beautiful weather tomorrow.

[SolEiji]

I wish for beautiful weather tomorrow.

Wish granted.  The weather is PERFECT, as the global climate shifts to your liking.  And of course nature compensates, as millions die from the flooding in Africa, the tornados in Japan, the hurricanes destroying Europe, and the entire ecosystem falling apart.

I wish for a catgirl, as per all the classic catgirls in anime and fiction.

[skydragonknight]

I wish for a catgirl, as per all the classic catgirls in anime and fiction.

Wish granted! You briefly stalk Catwoman in Batman: the Animated series. You then get hit in the head with a Batarang, fall of a building and die, while Batman and Catwoman go off screen and get it on.

I wish for the Triforce.

[AfterCrescent]

Wish granted. Ganon arrives at your house with the dead bodies of Zelda and Link. You're next.
[spoiler][/spoiler]
I wish for a shoe.

[SolEiji]

I wish for a shoe.

Granted.  It is the shoe worn by the monty python foot.  It falls from the sky and crushes you and most of the city block.

I wish for a simple, ordinary, mundane kitten with a socialable temperament.

[Irthos Levethix]

Wish granted!  Your typical kitten proceeds to crap all over your carpet and leave golf-ball sized piles of puke on your pillow.

I wish I was a better CO'er