I say get Half-Fey. Whatever the other +1 comes from is more or less irrelevant. There's sure to be a +1 LA race out there somewhere that gives +4 Charisma or somesuch nonsense, for a +8 total to Charisma.
Levels 1-5: Dread Necromancer//Cloistered Cleric <--- Trickery and Undeath Domains, Knowledge Devotion
Level 6: Mindbender//Cloistered Cleric <--- Rebuke Undead should stack with Dread Necro, even though it's not explicitly stated as such.
Level 7: Dread Necromancer//Pale Master <--- Negate Pale Master's dead level.
Level 8-10: Pale Master//Cloistered Cleric <--- Pale Master's awesome class abilities + Cleric's Turn Undead
Level 11-12: Dread Necromancer//Contemplative <--- Get Deathbound domain, apply to Dread Necro if possible.
Level 13-19: Pale Master//Cloistered Cleric <--- Somewhere in here you get an undead cohort.
20th level is pretty wide-open. If you have a 1-level dip you want, ANY 1-level dip, stick it in at 20th level. If it doesn't advance arcane spellcasting, combine it with Dread Necro. If it does, combine it with Cleric. If it somehow advances both Turning and Arcane Spellcasting, then you can combine it with something else entirely if you so choose. If you don't have anything special, just get another level of Dread Necro and Contemplative.
If you really don't want the Cleric spellcasting and would prefer stronger base numbers early, then you can drop the first 5 levels of Cloistered Cleric for Ranger. Other levels of Cloistered Cleric are done to advance Rebuke Undead, if your DM allows it (it doesn't explicitly work, but falls into the category of reasonable house rules). That said, you're really not going to be genuinely overpowered without those Cleric levels. You can abuse the hell out of spawning undead like Shadows, Ghouls, and especially Wights (1 Wight + small town = army of Wights controlled for 4HD), but any Cleric or Wizard can also do that and all the other broken stuff they do.
Obvious feat picks are Mindsight and Tomb-Tained Soul. I also like Tomb-Born Vitality myself for crunch-backed creep factor, but it's strictly optional. I'm sure there's a necromancy handbook around here somewhere for all the rest.