Optimaztion Challenge: Douchey-DM

[PlzBreakMyCampaign]

Yup either case is douchebaggery as the OP suspected. I'm with Pxy on this. Straight Druid don't take any suspicious feats (natural spell and greenbound seem simple enough). We all know the obvious AC to chose. Play nice with the party. Make sure that you buff them and that they like you.

But for his BBEG's show no mercy. Nothing says "don't nerf my melee character" like 1-turning a BBEG because you are a full caster.

[woodenbandman]

Re: bruceleeroy

You never bite a character's arm off because a player is a douche. You tell the player that he's being a douche.

[Solo]

If the DM is willing to blithely break rules and invent situations to nerf characters, you can't optimize it, except in that you convince him you're playing what he wants you to play but better. So as far as that goes, be a non-flashy character, like a control wizard or the like.

Alternatively, go with my suggestion and be a very weak character. Be incredibly incompetent and spite the DM by not being able to do anything, thus killing the story.

[wotmaniac]

not sure how relevant this might be, but here's something to consider:
I've often done debilitating things to characters (rip-out eyeballs, amputation, etc.) as a matter of plot-device.  If taken as a roleplaying opportunity, there may at least be a silver-lining to be found (this involves a discussion with the DM) -- if the player has accepted and embraced the bane and immersed themselves in it, they usually end-up scoring big-time (also makes for interesting side-quests).

Or he might just be going out of his way to be a gygaxian dickhead -- since I don't know the DM, you make the call. 

[weenog]

If the DM is willing to blithely break rules and invent situations to nerf characters, you can't optimize it, except in that you convince him you're playing what he wants you to play but better. So as far as that goes, be a non-flashy character, like a control wizard or the like.

Alternatively, go with my suggestion and be a very weak character. Be incredibly incompetent and spite the DM by not being able to do anything, thus killing the story.

Just how defensively oriented can a build get if it's willing to completely ignore the need to actually contribute?  A very weak character that's impossible to kill without more flagrant Rule 0 abuse might be amusing.

[Viletta Vadim]

I'd like to point out the other side of the coin, though: perhaps the player didn't get his arm bitten off because he was "too powerful", but because he's a dickhead. I have had players in my group who were just begging for a good mauling.

Lopping off a character's arm because the player is being annoying is every bit as inexcusable because it's a case of being a passive-aggressive ass.

[Unbeliever]

I'd like to point out the other side of the coin, though: perhaps the player didn't get his arm bitten off because he was "too powerful", but because he's a dickhead. I have had players in my group who were just begging for a good mauling.

Lopping off a character's arm because the player is being annoying is every bit as inexcusable because it's a case of being a passive-aggressive ass.

More importantly, it's not that the character's arm was torn off.  It was that he was hit by a superluminal "you can't use your feats or class abilities anymore" effect.  There is no obvious reason why arm lopping prevents one from using the Rapid Shot feat w/ thrown weapons, which was really where the DM was going for.  Having encounters where monsters can permanently strip the players of their abilities at a whim seems like total dickery. 

I do sort of like the idea of a very unkillable, but somewhat useless character.  The other thing to do is see what your fellow players think.  The DM seems to have some very strict or specific ideas of what he's doing.  Or, he sees himself as playing chess against you.  This last one I think is deeply flawed, but could still be fun, except, he's not playing by anything vaguely recognizable as rules.  If the other players are just in it for a bloody romp, then I say continually mangle his plot and gameworld till he comes around.  Although note that's only after the more mature "talk to the DM like he's a grown-up" avenue is exhausted.

[wotmaniac]

Just had a thought -- you could go 1 of 2 ways with this (flavored according to your mood):
1) commoner 1/survivor 5/whatever else after that (?? maybe rogue 4/exemplar10 ??).  can do a few different things here, depending on how passive-aggressive you're feeling:
  a) spend all your feats on boosting skills -- focus on tumble, etc. and you can provide flanking (stats = 8, 17, 16, 10, 8, 8);
    a2) or you could just dump it all in to completely worthless skills (stats = 10, 10, 18, 10, 10, 9)
  b) focus exclusively in x-bow, max hide and move silently (stats = 8, 18, 14, 10, 8, 8)
2) if you like martial characters, rock yourself an FB Uber-charger or a Lockdown -- then watch DM go apoplectic.
(druid 20 has already been taken)

:twocents:  

I'd like to point out the other side of the coin, though: perhaps the player didn't get his arm bitten off because he was "too powerful", but because he's a dickhead. I have had players in my group who were just begging for a good mauling.

Lopping off a character's arm because the player is being annoying is every bit as inexcusable because it's a case of being a passive-aggressive ass.

More importantly, it's not that the character's arm was torn off.  It was that he was hit by a superluminal "you can't use your feats or class abilities anymore" effect.  There is no obvious reason why arm lopping prevents one from using the Rapid Shot feat w/ thrown weapons, which was really where the DM was going for.  Having encounters where monsters can permanently strip the players of their abilities at a whim seems like total dickery.  

I do sort of like the idea of a very unkillable, but somewhat useless character.  The other thing to do is see what your fellow players think.  The DM seems to have some very strict or specific ideas of what he's doing.  Or, he sees himself as playing chess against you.  This last one I think is deeply flawed, but could still be fun, except, he's not playing by anything vaguely recognizable as rules.  If the other players are just in it for a bloody romp, then I say continually mangle his plot and gameworld till he comes around.  Although note that's only after the more mature "talk to the DM like he's a grown-up" avenue is exhausted.

in reality, this probably hits the nail squarely on the head.

I'd like to point out the other side of the coin, though: perhaps the player didn't get his arm bitten off because he was "too powerful", but because he's a dickhead. I have had players in my group who were just begging for a good mauling.

Lopping off a character's arm because the player is being annoying is every bit as inexcusable because it's a case of being a passive-aggressive ass.

[awaken DM golem]

... and Druid again.

Careful that your DM doesn't bite of the arm (leg) of the War Puppy.
Talk about crystals and fairies and spirits alot ... even using a california stoner voice.
Download a cute puppy pic as a Dispel Evul DM material component.
If you "accidentally" win a combat, switch to arnold schwartsenegger voice about your Mean Puppy Needs A Nap, Kindergarten Cop.
etc ...

[BruceLeeroy]

Ok, seriously. I just came across some 60's psychedelic DRUID THEME SONG rock.

It's even named after the Druid20's favorite AC: Tyrannosaurus Rex.

Listen to this shit! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eAj48xD1OPI

The freakin' song is called FIST HEART MIGHTY DAWN DART! For fuck's sake!

So, the point is: a whole new dimension to the campaign wreckin' Druid20. Sing your theme song every time you charge into battle! Watch your DM's head explode!

Edit: By the way, I've never actually maimed a character because the player was being a dick. But IF I DID, I would explain to the player exactly why it was happening. (Ok, Bob. You're being a dick. So y'know what? The Gods (meaning me) have cursed you. From now until change your dickish ways, I'm using this 3rd party deck of critical hit cards every time an enemy crits you. Call it karma.)

[Solo]

Incidentally, one good thing about Monks? They can never be disarmed.

[TheEndIsNear]

Incidentally, one good thing about Monks? They can never be disarmed.

I loled
Have you read the thread?

I love the image though.

[dna1]

Hello my friends!

Thank you all for the great feed back, iv decided to pwn him with the druid greenbound awesomeness.

I will be letting you all know how it goes 

[LimaBeanMage]

Thank you all for the great feed back, iv decided to pwn him with the druid greenbound awesomeness.

A powerful base class with an good feat to augment that class' abilities? This sounds like you're asking for more of the same from your DM.

If I've learned anything from being the lonely optimizer in several DnD groups, it has to be to pick things your DM is already very familiar with. If you ever have to explain any rules to a stingy DM for the first time then you're asking to be shot down right there.

[McPoyo]

If you were an elven druid, you could just act like the elves from Overlord II.

[JaronK]

A DM like this will think that pure core is more balanced.  Human Druid with Combat Expertise and Improved Trip would work great.

With that said, don't overwhelm him.  Remember, he nerfed you because you were too strong for his story.  Coming at him with something rediculously powerful will only confirm his belief that you can't play something in the right power level.  So honestly?  I'd go with Monk.  Fit his story.

JaronK

[bananaphone]

How did your character get his arm ripped off in the first place?  Was it a plot device?  Do you guys roll on a critical chart?  Or did your DM just decide it happened during a combat?
Honestly, the part about not being able to use your thrower's class abilities with one arm should tip off everybody that your DM is just a dick. 
Unless there is something you're not telling us, I don't think any build you throw at him will matter since he is still the DM and he still can go god-mode on you.

That being said, Druid is definitely the way to go if indeed this DM is old school.  Greenbound Summoning is pretty cheesy good. (I personally don't use it as I've read that Ed Bonny intended it to be a +2 Metamagic feat)
Assuming you are playing at level 3 as indicated, your summons will only last 3 rounds though, so make the most of them.  I believe that the Greenbound template gives them the ability to cast Wall of Thorns as a spell-like ability, so if you can Speak with Plants, you can tell your summons to cast it.  There is also a good list of summons already statted with the Greenbound Template here:    http://brilliantgameologists.com/boards/index.php?topic=3140.0
Also, for those early levels, a riding dog trained for war makes an excellent Animal Companion.  Make your DM hate those trip attacks.

[dna1]

Alittle back story about the DM?
 He is in his 40's, a firefighter, probly the nicest guy you could ever meet. If there is a real life Lawfull Good Paladin, this is him.
That being said, he thinks that playing this game, his way, will be more fun for everyone.
No items? No multiclassing? No stat dumping? Everyone HAS to be a HUMAN, and GOOD?
   doesnt sound like much fun to me. But I do love RPing so I will play.
I made the characters to his exact demands, the only problem is I still make them so much better than he does, it looks OP.

Seriously when I was DMing, everyone was like 9th level, and his Knight he was playing was so weak, that his 5th level cohort was doing more damage then him, and it was a weak ass rogue I made for him. 
To answer your question:
  An owl bear bit my arm off while he had me grappled. Yes I am a bit of an ass, and typically throw a wrench into most of the DM's plans just because I make smart decisions and decent characters.
However, this last game he outlawed the book of 9 swords completely. Then proceeded to 1 hit my character, and nearly kill our warblade as well. He likes Druids tho so the greenbound summoner is in 
I took it easy this first session with him tho 
If my druid dies then I am going to come in as some sort of unkillable useless guy 
il keep you guys posted
thanks for the help

[Viletta Vadim]

Again, talk to the guy.  Communication is needed.  Make with that communication, relisten to some of the problem-solving episodes, it's the only way these problems will ever actually get solved.

[KellKheraptis]

Druid or Shadowcraft Mage, so long as it's a full caster.  And failing that, eye for an eye.  He wants to target limbs to take away abilities, disarm his creature and then break his arms, stating he can't be making attack rolls for incapacitated adversaries