Author Topic: [Self] The Adventures of Fistbeard Beardfist  (Read 13052 times)

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Solo

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[Self] The Adventures of Fistbeard Beardfist
« on: April 16, 2010, 08:09:42 AM »
Fistbeard Beardfist and the Fountain of Unlikely Chance

Fistbeard Beardfist and the Invaders from the Eighth Dimension

Who is Fistbeard Beardfist?

Fistbeard Beardfist is the alias of a great dwarf warrior of the Iron Fathers clan, whose exploits have become legend in his own time. Being a dwarf among dwarves, it was only natural that he would become a Deepwarden upon reaching adulthood, where he quickly rose up the ranks to become one of their best warriors due to his proficiency drinking and in beard based combat.

Unfortunately, due to a falling out with the Deepwarden commander, he found himself assigned to the most unpleasant posting imaginable to a Dwarf: liaison to the elves of Isteroth glade.

Due to his quasi-exile to the surface, Fistbeard has had the opportunity to participate in more adventures than the vast majority of his kin, starting off with the Dragon of the Witchwood Incident, and culminating in the epic Search for the Star of Tomorrow.

His life's story is contained in an autobiography in the Iron Father's clan archives, and is currently being made into a ballad by the kobold adventuring band and musical sensation Dragonforce.


Fistbeard Beardfist: The Character Build

[spoiler]
Fistbeard Beardfist
Ranger 2 / Monk 2 / Ranger 1 / Deepwarden 2 / Fist of the Forest 3 / Kensai 2
ACFs:
Passive Way Monk: Combat Expertise and Improved Trip as bonus feats
Strongarm Ranger: Power Attack as Combat Style Bonus Feat
Trap Expert: Trade Track for Trapfinding and Disable Device as a class skill.
Feats:
Great Fortitude
Power Attack
Poison Healer: Heal Constitution modifier hit points every time you successfully resist a poison.
Steadfast Determination: Use Constitution modifier in the place of Wisdom modifier for will saves. Also, a natural 1 on a fortitude save is not an automatic failure.
Weapon Focus: Unarmed Strike
Snap Kick: Make an additional unarmed strike attack; all attacks that round take a -2 penalty.

Abilities:
Stonewarden: A Deepwarden may use his Constitution modifier in place of his Dexterity if his Constitution is higher. This bonus is lost in all situations that a Dexterity bonus would be lost under.
Fist of the Forest AC bonus: While unarmored, you gain a bonus to your Armor Class equal to your Constitution bonus (if any). See the monk class feature (PH 40).
Feral Trance: For the duration of the trance, you gain a +4 bonus to Dexterity and a +2 bonus on damage rolls with your unarmed strikes. You can also make one bite attack per round at your highest attack bonus whenever you attack as a full-round action.
The damage for this attack is 1d6 + your Str modifier, regardless of your size. A feral trance lasts for a number of rounds equal to 3 + your Con modifier. While in a trance, you cannot perform certain actions, and afterward you are fatigued. These restrictions are the same as those for the barbarian's rage class feature (PH 25-26).
Signature Weapon: A Kensai gains the ability to enchant his signature weapon and imbue it with power.
Power Surge: A Kensai may make a DC 15 concentration check as a move action in order to gain +8 to Strength for a number of rounds equal to one half his Kensai level. The DC increases by 5 each time he uses the ability within a 24 hour period.
Current weapon enchantments:
Beard: +2, Eager, and Warning via amulet of Natural Attacks
Preferred alcohol: Homebrewed dwarven whiskey.[/spoiler]

Fistbeard Beardfist: The Bragging Theme Tune

When you're in trouble who do you call?
Who do you need when you're in a brawl?
Who is the drunkest dwarf of all?
Fistbeard Beardfist, of course!

Fists of iron! Abs of stone!
Balls of brass and beard of roan!
Fistbeard! Beardfist! Fistbeard Beardfist!

When orcs are invading who do you find?
When tentacled monsters attack your mind?
When elves are being snobby and unkind?
Fistbeard Beardfist, of course!

Knuckles like steel! Ale that's blessed!
Fist of beard and beard of fist!
Fistbeard! Beardfist! Fistbeard Beardfist!
« Last Edit: July 14, 2011, 01:26:51 AM by Solo »

"I am the Black Mage! I cast the spells that makes the peoples fall down!"

The Legend RPG, which I worked on and encourage you to read.

Torvon

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Re: [Self] Fistbeard Beardfist and the Fountain of Unlikely Chance
« Reply #1 on: April 19, 2010, 05:43:04 PM »
hilarious :)
Quote from: Saxony
Sword Sage is like Arcane Stunt Swashbuckler on steroids with less BAB.

Solo

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Re: [Self] Fistbeard Beardfist and the Fountain of Unlikely Chance
« Reply #2 on: April 23, 2010, 04:23:01 AM »
Thanks :)

"I am the Black Mage! I cast the spells that makes the peoples fall down!"

The Legend RPG, which I worked on and encourage you to read.

Mushroom Ninja

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Re: [Self] Fistbeard Beardfist and the Fountain of Unlikely Chance
« Reply #3 on: April 24, 2010, 07:40:11 AM »
Has Giacomo seen this yet?

Solo

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Re: [Self] Fistbeard Beardfist and the Fountain of Unlikely Chance
« Reply #4 on: April 24, 2010, 07:48:58 AM »
I have no way of knowing that, but I hope he gets an aneurysm when he does.

"I am the Black Mage! I cast the spells that makes the peoples fall down!"

The Legend RPG, which I worked on and encourage you to read.

Vynar

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Re: [Self] Fistbeard Beardfist and the Fountain of Unlikely Chance
« Reply #5 on: May 09, 2010, 03:09:57 PM »
I am going to read this because I really enjoyed your Sorcerer handbook but if it sucks I will right a strongly worded letter and then probably discard it because I don't want to anger a sorcerer.....

Edit: Starting it and it is enjoyable so far.
« Last Edit: May 09, 2010, 03:17:52 PM by Vynar »

Solo

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Re: [Self] Fistbeard Beardfist and the Fountain of Unlikely Chance
« Reply #6 on: June 01, 2010, 12:58:24 PM »
Fistbeard Beardfist and the Invaders from the Eighth Dimension is now being uploaded to FFnet.

Also, he has been mentioned on TV tropes. Huzzah!
« Last Edit: June 06, 2010, 01:46:22 PM by Solo »

"I am the Black Mage! I cast the spells that makes the peoples fall down!"

The Legend RPG, which I worked on and encourage you to read.

Solo

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Re: [Self] Fistbeard Beardfist and the Fountain of Unlikely Chance
« Reply #7 on: June 06, 2010, 01:44:42 PM »
When you're in trouble who do you call?
Who do you need when you're in a brawl?
Who is the drunkest dwarf of all?
Fistbeard Beardfist, of course!

Fists of iron! Abs of stone!
Balls of brass and beard of roan!
Fistbeard! Beardfist! Fistbeard Beardfist!

When orcs are invading who do you find?
When tentacled monsters attack your mind?
When elves are being snobby and unkind?
Fistbeard Beardfist, of course!

Knuckles like steel! Ale that's blessed!
Fist of beard and beard of fist!
Fistbeard! Beardfist! Fistbeard Beardfist!
« Last Edit: June 06, 2010, 06:09:19 PM by Solo »

"I am the Black Mage! I cast the spells that makes the peoples fall down!"

The Legend RPG, which I worked on and encourage you to read.

Prime32

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Re: [Self] Fistbeard Beardfist and the Fountain of Unlikely Chance
« Reply #8 on: June 06, 2010, 02:16:40 PM »
Any tune that's supposed to go with? My brain first tried to match it up with Teen Titans, then Gigantor.
My work
The tier system in a nutshell:
[spoiler]Tier 6: A cartographer.
Tier 5: An expert cartographer or a decent marksman.
Tier 4: An expert marksman.
Tier 3: An expert marksman, cartographer and chef who can tie strong knots and is trained in hostage negotiation or a marksman so good he can shoot down every bullet fired by a minigun while armed with a rusted single-shot pistol that veers to the left.
Tier 2: Someone with teleportation, mind control, time manipulation, intangibility, the ability to turn into an exact duplicate of anything, or the ability to see into the future with perfect accuracy.
Tier 1: Someone with teleportation, mind control, time manipulation, intangibility, the ability to turn into an exact duplicate of anything and the ability to see into the future with perfect accuracy.[/spoiler]

Solo

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Re: [Self] Fistbeard Beardfist and the Fountain of Unlikely Chance
« Reply #9 on: June 06, 2010, 02:27:51 PM »
Try Duck Tails. Or Darkwing Duck.

"I am the Black Mage! I cast the spells that makes the peoples fall down!"

The Legend RPG, which I worked on and encourage you to read.

woodenbandman

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Re: [Self] Fistbeard Beardfist and the Fountain of Unlikely Chance
« Reply #10 on: June 07, 2010, 06:15:50 PM »
I find that it's rather akin to the "You are a pirate" chorus.


Solo

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Re: [Self] Fistbeard Beardfist and the Fountain of Unlikely Chance
« Reply #11 on: June 09, 2010, 03:48:46 AM »
Updated original post with a bunch of information.

"I am the Black Mage! I cast the spells that makes the peoples fall down!"

The Legend RPG, which I worked on and encourage you to read.

Solo

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Re: [Self] The Adventures of Fistbeard Beardfist
« Reply #12 on: August 02, 2010, 10:13:13 PM »
Second story finished. Now working on a third.

"I am the Black Mage! I cast the spells that makes the peoples fall down!"

The Legend RPG, which I worked on and encourage you to read.

PhaedrusXY

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Re: [Self] The Adventures of Fistbeard Beardfist
« Reply #13 on: August 16, 2010, 09:08:47 PM »
Just finished chapter 3 of the first one, and I have to say it is highly amusing.  :lol
[spoiler]
A couple of water benders, a dike, a flaming arrow, and a few barrels of blasting jelly?

Sounds like the makings of a gay porn film.
...thanks
[/spoiler]

Solo

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Re: [Self] The Adventures of Fistbeard Beardfist
« Reply #14 on: September 02, 2011, 03:56:17 AM »
Has Giacomo seen this yet?
Giacomo has seen this and it annoyed him greatly. Mission accomplished.

"I am the Black Mage! I cast the spells that makes the peoples fall down!"

The Legend RPG, which I worked on and encourage you to read.