Optimization of a Chicken Infested Commoner?

[SanjiWatsuki]

Hi, everyone.

I was checking out the Chicken Infested flaw and I suddenly had an idea. Why not use the spell component pouch to free action draw a chicken without using a feat and then using it for an Iaijutsu attack? The question for me then was how to optimize this idea. Any official D&D 3.5/3.0 without updates will be allowed, but Dragon Magazine should be used sparingly.

I'm guessing it would start off with Commoner 1/Factotum 8. Commoner for the Chicken Infested flaw and Factotum for the Iaijutsu Focus skill.

The character would carry around a bunch of marbles for forcing balance checks and the Arcane Dilettante from Factotum could throw down Grease now and then. Perhaps a Sword Sage dip is in order for the Ruby Nightmare Blade for additional flat-footed attacks?

Any additional input would be appreciated.

[PhaedrusXY]

Per the Rules Compendium, just being hidden/invisible makes your target flat-footed with respect to you. This is a modification to the core rules, but supposedly the RC trumps them. So you don't actually need Grease/Marbles/etc, if you're good at hiding and/or turning invisible.

Now the problem becomes how to use a chicken as a weapon...

[bearsarebrown]

Drunken Master

[archangel.arcanis]

wasn't...
hit reply see someone else posted your answer frown.

Bears arebrown (i decided that was your new middle name for now) 

[SanjiWatsuki]

Drunken Master

Hm. It looks like a moderately feat heavy entrance. This would also mean the chicken would break on a natural 1. Poor chicken.

It does appear to be the only way to remove the improvised weapon penalty, though.

Edit: Blast, it only increases damage without removing the penalty...

[archangel.arcanis]

it also increases their damage (to your unarmed) and adds an extra die that will increase as you take more levels in the class.

edit:
Combine this with superior unarmed strike (ToB), monks belt, ring of improved natural attacks, etc.. (the standard monk methods of increasing damage) to get the chicken dealing big numbers.

Also combine with other feats and items to make them ranged and ways to get better damage. a dip into Pyro. to add flaming so they are already cooked helps too.

[Saxony]

Drunken Master

Hm. It looks like a moderately feat heavy entrance. This would also mean the chicken would break on a natural 1. Poor chicken.

Using this for a gag is half the point of the Drunken Master PrC, imo. I would laugh if someone rolled a natural 1 with a chicken and Iaijutsu Focus'd their foot or something. Or maybe the wizard.

Also:
Become huge size. Get the snatch feat. Wield an orc as a weapon. Roll a natural 1 (or use some feat which turns your rolls into natural 1's, I'm sure there's a flaw or two). Insta dead orc Or even insta dead BBEG. You could take all the feats which give you more attacks so the chance of you rolling a natural 1 on a full attack is high. And then flurry the stone floor.

[archangel.arcanis]

there are certain feats that allow you to use flurry of blows with other weapons. They should have one for flurry with improvised weapons, if the drunken master doesn't allow for that already.

[Nunkuruji]

Thrower with a familiar that readies a wand of Animal Growth as you throw chickens, just for the 

[gorfnad]

Lo and behold, the mighty chicken-warrior is here!


I'm sure this has been done sometime before, but as I couldn't find it on these boards, I present you...


Joe "Chuck" Awesome

Human Commoner1/Monk2/Paladin2/Fighter2/Warblade1/Bloodstormblade4/DrunkenMaster8
(not necessarily in that order)

Build Progression:
ECL 1 Commoner 1 Flaws: Chicken Infested, Shaky->Feats: Sacred Vow, Vow of Poverty, Nymph's kiss, Great Fortitude
ECL 2 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 1 Touch of Golden Ice, Dodge, Improved Unarmed Strike
ECL 3 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 2 Mobility, -FREE FEAT-
ECL 4 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 2/Fighter 1 Quickdraw, Servant of the Heavens
ECL 5 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 2/Fighter 2 Improved Initiative
ECL 6 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 2/Fighter 2/Drunken Master 1 Nimbus of Light, -FREE FEAT-
ECL 7 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 2/Fighter 2/Drunken Master 2
ECL 8 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 2/Fighter 2/Drunken Master 3 -Holy Radiance-
ECL 9 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 2/Fighter 2/Drunken Master 4 -FREE FEAT-
ECL 10 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 2/Fighter 2/Drunken Master 5 -Vow of Obedience-
ECL 11 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 2/Fighter 2/Drunken Master 6
ECL 12 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 2/Fighter 2/Drunken Master 7 -Intuitive attack-, -FREE FEAT-
ECL 13 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 2/Fighter 2/Drunken Master 8
ECL 14 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 2/Fighter 2/Drunken Master 8/Paladin 1 -Gift of Faith-
ECL 15 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 2/Fighter 2/Drunken Master 8/Paladin 2
ECL 16 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 2/Fighter 2/Drunken Master 8/Paladin 2/Warblade 1 -Gift of Grace-
ECL 17 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 2/Fighter 2/Drunken Master 8/Paladin 2/Warblade 1/Bloodstorm Blade 1
ECL 18 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 2/Fighter 2/Drunken Master 8/Paladin 2/Warblade 1/Bloodstorm Blade 2 -Hands of a Healer-, -FREE FEAT-
ECL 19 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 2/Fighter 2/Drunken Master 8/Paladin 2/Warblade 1/Bloodstorm Blade 3 -Bonus Fighter feat-
ECL 20 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 2/Fighter 2/Drunken Master 8/Paladin 2/Warblade 1/Bloodstorm Blade 4 -Stigmata-


Obviously, this build isn't perfected yet. I have one free fighter feat(and am treated as 5th level fighter in order to qualify for feats) and FIVE other open feats.

I could pick up the TWF chain, or spring attack, or whatever else.

It doesn't matter.

What *does* matter, however, is that this guy has 16 BaB, can quickdraw chickens out of thin air, and bludgeon opponents to death with them, dealing 1d6+1d8+5+STR damage.
Optionally, he can *throw* these chickens as bloodstorm blade for even more sillyness.

Tom "Chuck" Awesome, or "HOLY HELL HE'S THROWING BURNING CHICKENS! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!"

Silverbrow Human Commoner1/Monk3/Bard3/Warblade7/BloodstormBlade4/DrunkenMaster2
(not necessarily in that order)

Build Progression:
ECL 1 Commoner 1 Flaws: Chicken Infested, Shaky->Feats: Sacred Vow, Vow of Poverty, Nymph's kiss, Extra Favored Class: Commoner, Great Fortitude
ECL 2 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 1 Touch of Golden Ice, Dodge, Improved Unarmed Strike
ECL 3 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 2 Mobility, -FREE FEAT(TWF?)-
ECL 4 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 2/Bard 1 Servant of the Heavens
ECL 5 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 2/Bard 2
ECL 6 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 2/Bard 2/Warblade 1 Nimbus of Light, Song of the White Raven
ECL 7 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 2/Bard 2/Warblade 2
ECL 8 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 2/Bard 3/Warblade 2 Words of Creation
ECL 9 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 3/Bard 3/Warblade 2 Dragonfire Inspiration
ECL 10 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 3/Bard 3/Warblade 2/Drunken Master 1 Holy Radiance
ECL 11 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 3/Bard 3/Warblade 2/Drunken Master 2
ECL 12 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 3/Bard 3/Warblade 2/Drunken Master 2/Bloodstorm Blade 1 Intuitive attack, -FREE FEAT(Leadership?)-
ECL 13 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 3/Bard 3/Warblade 2/Drunken Master 2/Bloodstorm Blade 2
ECL 14 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 3/Bard 3/Warblade 2/Drunken Master 2/Bloodstorm Blade 3 Gift of Faith, -FREE FIGHTER FEAT(ITWF?)-
ECL 15 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 3/Bard 3/Warblade 2/Drunken Master 2/Bloodstorm Blade 4 -FREE FEAT(GTWF?)-
ECL 16 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 3/Bard 3/Warblade 3/Drunken Master 2/Bloodstorm Blade 4 Stigmata
ECL 17 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 3/Bard 3/Warblade 4/Drunken Master 2/Bloodstorm Blade 4
ECL 18 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 3/Bard 3/Warblade 5/Drunken Master 2/Bloodstorm Blade 4 Quickdraw, Vow of Obedience, Song of the Heart
ECL 19 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 3/Bard 3/Warblade 6/Drunken Master 2/Bloodstorm Blade 4
ECL 20 Commoner 1/Monk(Cobra Strike Variant) 3/Bard 3/Warblade 7/Drunken Master 2/Bloodstorm Blade 4 -Bonus Exalted Feat(Vow of Chastity?)-


This build can produce Inspire courage effects of a 10th level bard, i.e. +2.
Words of creation doubles that to +4, song of the heart adds another +1, inspirational boost adds another +1, for a total of +6/+6 up to three times per day.
Alternatively, you can change that +6/+6 bonus into +6d6 fire damage thanks to dragonfire inspiration, and fight with FLAMING CHICKENS.

Other than that...you get into to damage if you flank/catch an opponent flatfooted, have bardic knowledge of +(3+int), wis to AC, all VoP benefits as usual(though the extremely limited list of exalted feats did make me take some exalted feats I'd usually avoid...precisely, Vow of Obedience and Vow of Chastity), 1d6 base unarmed damage, 1d6+1d4 base damage with chickens(who are treated as +5 magic and goodaligned weapons, btw), some maneuvers(Initiator level 13, so up to 7th level maneuvers! Late Warblade levels also allow for very high-level maneuvers), a +10ft enhancement bonus to speed from Monk, all the typical Bloodstorm Blade Goodies, the drunken master's STAGGER ability, allowing for some very fun charges...

Otherwise go with Commoner 1/ Dread Necromancer X with the feats Corpsecrafter and Destructive Retribution for undead exploding chickens.

[snakeman830]

I seem to remember there actually being a build around this involving Vow of Poverty (so they were all +5 Holy chickens)  Not entirely sure that you could keep your exalted status for too long like that, but you never know...

Google "Cluck-fu master".

[gorfnad]

I seem to remember there actually being a build around this involving Vow of Poverty (so they were all +5 Holy chickens)  Not entirely sure that you could keep your exalted status for too long like that, but you never know...

Google "Cluck-fu master".

Already did, see my previous post.

[PhaedrusXY]

I seem to remember there actually being a build around this involving Vow of Poverty (so they were all +5 Holy chickens)  Not entirely sure that you could keep your exalted status for too long like that, but you never know...

Google "Cluck-fu master".

That depends on whether chickens are secretly evil (or exalted, and willing to sacrifice themselves for the greater good).

Also... do you think it counts as "summoning" when a Chicken-Infested Commoner draws a chicken from thin air? If so... the Alienist PrC could be fun to pair with this. 

[snakeman830]

I seem to remember there actually being a build around this involving Vow of Poverty (so they were all +5 Holy chickens)  Not entirely sure that you could keep your exalted status for too long like that, but you never know...

Google "Cluck-fu master".

That depends on whether chickens are secretly evil (or exalted, and willing to sacrifice themselves for the greater good).

Also... do you think it counts as "summoning" when a Chicken-Infested Commoner draws a chicken from thin air? If so... the Alienist PrC could be fun to pair with this. 

Beating foes to death with magical alien chickens.  Greatest. Strategy. Ever.

[Akalsaris]

Heh...my first thought after somebody said "Drunken Master" was "And bloodstorm blade!"  But it looks like this is apparently a path others have already followed

[Prime32]

Is there some way to turn chickens into hippos?

[PhaedrusXY]

Is there some way to turn chickens into hippos?

If so, we will have created the ultimate D&D character. Not even Pun-Pun will be able to rival him.

[Bozwevial]

Is there some way to turn chickens into hippos?

If so, we will have created the ultimate D&D character. Not even Pun-Pun will be able to rival him.

You forgot ranks in Craft (basketweaving).

[SanjiWatsuki]

ECL 1 Commoner 1 Flaws: Chicken Infested, Shaky. Feats: Sacred Vow (ECL), Vow of Poverty (Human), Nymph's Kiss (Flaw), Great Fortitude (Flaw)
ECL 2 Commoner 1/Monk (Cobra Strike) Touch of Golden Ice (VoP), Dodge (Monk), Improved Unarmed Strike (Monk)
ECL 3 Commoner 1/Monk 1/Factotum 1 Knowledge Devotion (ECL)
ECL 4 Commoner 1/Monk 1/Factotum 2 Gift of Faith (VoP)
ECL 5 Commoner 1/Monk 1/Factotum 3
ECL 6 Commoner 1/Monk 1/Factotum 3/Drunken Master 1 Sanctify Martial Attacks [Chicken] (Exalted), Superior Unarmed Strike (ECL)

Hm. This is what I have down so far.

The general idea of it would be to Iaijutsu the enemy when it is possible and also attack them unarmed when it isn't viable and chickens would be inefficient. Be sure to take a point in Craft: Basketweaving because you can. Probably put some ranks in Knowledge: Arcana and Nature for the Knowledge Devotion while keeping 1 rank in the other identifying knowledges. Definitely a focus on Iaijutsu Focus for damage.

I'm guessing a chicken counts as a melee weapon, so we may be able to Iaijutsu Focus when we draw it from the Spell Components pouch and then throw it at the enemy. The penalties for improvised weapon are exactly the same, thrown or wielded.

Our, at this level, +1 Holy chicken damage should be 1d8 (Unarmed) + 1d4 (Drunken Master) + 1 (VoP) + ? (Knowledge Devotion bonus) and we can sometimes Iaijtusu them.

Thoughts up to this point?

[altpersona]

does CI require human?

if not, you could be a smaller than chicken creature, pulling chickens out of your pockets.


idk if you can get them to be a swarm or not.. if you can, you'll want that level of warlock.