hm, good point, but the point is to actually be a vampire that's basically just trolling his kin...
On that note, who's the artist on the second? the style is familiar.
and honestly it should have been "Sparkling Vampires have never been real vampires before"
I'd also like to state for the record that I feel like a horrible person anytime my mind legitimizes that crap, even in perverse mocking ways...