Author Topic: Wish Granted!  (Read 147810 times)

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emissary666

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Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #880 on: October 07, 2008, 11:59:13 PM »
Wish granted; you suddenly become a gay masochist! People laugh at you for being a stereotype

I wish I had the ability to make real things false
I make little kids cry
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Elennsar

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Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #881 on: October 08, 2008, 12:03:53 AM »
Wish granted! Unfortunately, you can't control what things you make false, and wind up ruling yourself out of existance.

I wish that Congress would be eaten by werewolves.
Faith can move mountains. It still can't deflect bullets.



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Vynar

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Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #882 on: October 08, 2008, 03:12:28 AM »
Wish granted! However, they all come back as the dreaded were-congress! You are summoned before them.

I wish for the ability to shoot loafs of wonderbread out of my eyes very slowly and painfully.

Chemus

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Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #883 on: October 08, 2008, 03:19:05 AM »
Wish Granted! In addition to the great pain and trauma caused by the 'bread' being extruded by your eye sockets, you are constantly surrounded by stupid people who mistake the wonderbread for food. You are never alone again.

I wish that 'Dungeons and Dragons: 4th edition' had been made in such a a way that I would have wanted to play it.
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Vas

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Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #884 on: October 08, 2008, 10:26:01 AM »
Wish granted. It was! But it was instantly replaced by 5th edition, even more painful than 4th could ever be

I wish for the worlds finest mako shark who is domesticated to follow my instructions alone
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Elennsar

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Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #885 on: October 08, 2008, 10:33:38 AM »
Wish granted! Unfortunately, you are eaten by a shark who hasn't been so domesticated.

I wish I could insult people in Japanese.
Faith can move mountains. It still can't deflect bullets.



"Communication with humans." is a cross-class skill for me. Please bear this in mind.

Agita

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Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #886 on: October 08, 2008, 10:54:02 AM »
Wish granted. You decide to try your newly-learned insults on a yakuza boss. Bad idea.

I wish I'd instantly learn everything I got told so I could get easy A's on all subjects without studying.
It's all about vision and making reality conform to your vision. By dropping a fucking house on it.

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emissary666

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Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #887 on: October 08, 2008, 11:11:50 AM »
Wish granted; somebody describe the MASSIVE crap they took the other day, you die in horror

I wish for my appendix to shoot fire
I make little kids cry
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Elennsar

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Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #888 on: October 08, 2008, 11:13:27 AM »
Wish granted! Unfortunately, it has a very short range. You burn to death.

I wish that Ghandi would come back from the dead.
Faith can move mountains. It still can't deflect bullets.



"Communication with humans." is a cross-class skill for me. Please bear this in mind.

emissary666

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Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #889 on: October 08, 2008, 03:14:14 PM »
Wish granted; Gandhi joins the fast growing hoard of radioactive zombies

I wish I was in Silent Hill
I make little kids cry
Steady As A Goat
Warning: You may have already been set on fire

Bread does not need a reason

RobbyPants

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Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #890 on: October 08, 2008, 03:23:08 PM »
Wish granted.  You've been written into a copy of a video game, sitting on someone's shelf, never to be played again.

---

I wish I had the best computer in the world.
My balancing 3.5 compendium
Elemental mage test game

Quotes
[spoiler]
Quote from: Cafiend
It is a shame stupidity isn't painful.
Quote from: StormKnight
Totally true.  Historians believe that most past civilizations would have endured for centuries longer if they had successfully determined Batman's alignment.
Quote from: Grand Theft Otto
Why are so many posts on the board the equivalent of " Dear Dr. Crotch, I keep punching myself in the crotch, and my groin hurts... what should I do? How can I make my groin stop hurting?"
Quote from: CryoSilver
I suggest carving "Don't be a dick" into him with a knife.  A dull, rusty knife.  A dull, rusty, bent, flaming knife.
Quote from: Seerow
Fluffy: It's over Steve! I've got the high ground!
Steve: You underestimate my power!
Fluffy: Don't try it, Steve!
Steve: *charges*
Fluffy: *three critical strikes*
Steve: ****
Quote from: claypigeons
I don't even stat out commoners. Commoner = corpse that just isn't a zombie. Yet.
Quote from: CryoSilver
When I think "Old Testament Boots of Peace" I think of a paladin curb-stomping an orc and screaming "Your death brings peace to this land!"
Quote from: Orville_Oaksong
Buy a small country. Or Pelor. Both are good investments.
[/spoiler]

Agita

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Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #891 on: October 08, 2008, 03:47:10 PM »
Wish granted. I steal it.

I wish I had already done my French homework.
It's all about vision and making reality conform to your vision. By dropping a fucking house on it.

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Prime32

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Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #892 on: October 08, 2008, 03:52:28 PM »
Wish granted. However, the national language of France changes to Swahili, and you homework is viewed as gibberish. You are the only person who knows that the world changed, and you soon go mad.

I wish for antimatter radioactive zombies that annihilate normal radioactive zombies on contact, except in the case that I am one of the zombies in which case only my double is destroyed while I become twice as strong.
My work
The tier system in a nutshell:
[spoiler]Tier 6: A cartographer.
Tier 5: An expert cartographer or a decent marksman.
Tier 4: An expert marksman.
Tier 3: An expert marksman, cartographer and chef who can tie strong knots and is trained in hostage negotiation or a marksman so good he can shoot down every bullet fired by a minigun while armed with a rusted single-shot pistol that veers to the left.
Tier 2: Someone with teleportation, mind control, time manipulation, intangibility, the ability to turn into an exact duplicate of anything, or the ability to see into the future with perfect accuracy.
Tier 1: Someone with teleportation, mind control, time manipulation, intangibility, the ability to turn into an exact duplicate of anything and the ability to see into the future with perfect accuracy.[/spoiler]

RobbyPants

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Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #893 on: October 08, 2008, 04:54:34 PM »
Wish granted.  Sadly, the zombies focus their efferts on all of your belongings, destroying all you own.

---

I wish I had a flying cat.
My balancing 3.5 compendium
Elemental mage test game

Quotes
[spoiler]
Quote from: Cafiend
It is a shame stupidity isn't painful.
Quote from: StormKnight
Totally true.  Historians believe that most past civilizations would have endured for centuries longer if they had successfully determined Batman's alignment.
Quote from: Grand Theft Otto
Why are so many posts on the board the equivalent of " Dear Dr. Crotch, I keep punching myself in the crotch, and my groin hurts... what should I do? How can I make my groin stop hurting?"
Quote from: CryoSilver
I suggest carving "Don't be a dick" into him with a knife.  A dull, rusty knife.  A dull, rusty, bent, flaming knife.
Quote from: Seerow
Fluffy: It's over Steve! I've got the high ground!
Steve: You underestimate my power!
Fluffy: Don't try it, Steve!
Steve: *charges*
Fluffy: *three critical strikes*
Steve: ****
Quote from: claypigeons
I don't even stat out commoners. Commoner = corpse that just isn't a zombie. Yet.
Quote from: CryoSilver
When I think "Old Testament Boots of Peace" I think of a paladin curb-stomping an orc and screaming "Your death brings peace to this land!"
Quote from: Orville_Oaksong
Buy a small country. Or Pelor. Both are good investments.
[/spoiler]

Chemus

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Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #894 on: October 08, 2008, 05:30:15 PM »
Wish Granted! It's abysmally stupid, plus it poops on the roof and in the attic, rather than in a litter box.

I wish that I were a Werecougar, with only human and cougar forms.
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InnaBinder

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Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #895 on: October 08, 2008, 05:52:06 PM »
Wish Granted! It's abysmally stupid, plus it poops on the roof and in the attic, rather than in a litter box.

I wish that I were a Werecougar, with only human and cougar forms.
Wish granted!  You chose poorly when assuming Cougar form so close to hunting season.  You do make a great rug, though.

I wish to have completely accurate and encyclopedic knowledge of all things D&D in my head at all times, easily recalled.
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TheWordSlinger

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Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #896 on: October 08, 2008, 06:47:24 PM »
Wish granted. This new ability makes a Mysterious Top Secret Organization very interested in you. You are never heard from again.

I wish for coffee. In a cup. In my hand.
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InnaBinder

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Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #897 on: October 08, 2008, 07:01:29 PM »
Wish granted. This new ability makes a Mysterious Top Secret Organization very interested in you. You are never heard from again.

I wish for coffee. In a cup. In my hand.
Wish granted!  You have one cup full of raw coffee beans.

I wish the Mysterious Top Secret Organization had allowed me one phone call first.
Winning an argument on the internet is like winning in the Special Olympics.  You won, but you're still retarded.

I made a Handbook!?

TheWordSlinger

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Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #898 on: October 08, 2008, 07:18:58 PM »
Wish granted, the line was busy.

I wish for brewed coffee. In a cup. In my hand.
Currently playing:
Forte Lulz, Chaotic EVIL Bard bent on world domination;
Canere Potentia, to sing of power.
Aralaxax, Warforged Osteomancer, Machines are my people, I wield bones as other wield swords.
Randall Gray, she's not sexually confused, honest!
Zion "I can make followers, but why bother when people line up for me?"
Currently DMing: Real Men Use Their Hands, World's Largest Dungeon
"If you can pretend to be a half-orc barbarian or a dwarf wizard then you can pretend to be an alpha male."-Ninjarabbit
"The hotel shop only had two decent books, and I'd written both of them."-Douglas Adams
"It's funny how the Earth never opens up and swallows you when you want it to." Xander Harris, Buffy the Vampire Slayer

Chemus

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Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #899 on: October 08, 2008, 07:57:28 PM »
Wish Granted! The coffee is wonderful, but the cup is a scorching hot 451 degrees fahrenheit.

I wish for my rug to be animated as a vampire via Create Greater Undead, so that I'm a Vampiric Werecougar!
*waves hand* This is not the sig you're looking for...
The freely downloadable and searchable 3.5 SRD I prefer (Web)
Camlen, Enniwey