Author Topic: Wish Granted!  (Read 40499 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Kai

  • (rhymes with pie)
  • Moderator
  • Donkey Kong
  • *
  • Posts: 745
  • Don't panic!
Wish Granted!
« on: November 23, 2008, 07:07:28 AM »
Grant the wish of the person above you, but with a twist. Then make a wish of your own.

Example:
Quote
Poster 1: I wish I was a great dancer.

Poster 2: Wish granted! You are the reigning world champion of the chicken dance...but you have to actually be wearing a chicken costume for your skill to be acknowledged by others.

Please do not try to circumvent the spirit of the game by adding provisions that others cannot screw up your wish or that something bad happens to the grantor instead of the wisher, etc.

And do try to remember this game is for fun and a fatality does not always have to occur for there to be a twist to the wish.


***

We'll start with the last wish from the old thread...

I wish for something completely inconsequential, because it won't come true anyway.
"You must be the change you wish to see in the world." ~Mahatma Gandhi

emissary666

  • King Kong
  • ****
  • Posts: 902
    • Email
Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #1 on: November 23, 2008, 03:14:39 PM »
I get a pancake. You are jealous of my pancake.

I wish for a better sense of time
I make little kids cry
Steady As A Goat
Warning: You may have already been set on fire

Bread does not need a reason

Chemus

  • Donkey Kong
  • ****
  • Posts: 751
Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #2 on: November 23, 2008, 08:05:33 PM »
Your newly minted obsessive compulsive disorder causes you to count every second, mark every minute with a check of the crease on your pants (you are now pressing your jeans and your sweatpants, as well as your shorts), and mark every hour with a double tap on your left earlobe. Days, weeks and years you announce verbally at midnight.

I wish that I didn't procrastinate so
*waves hand* This is not the sig you're looking for...
The freely downloadable and searchable 3.5 SRD I prefer (Web)
Camlen, Enniwey

TheWordSlinger

  • Bi-Curious George
  • ****
  • Posts: 492
  • Nunc est bibendum
    • Email
Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #3 on: November 24, 2008, 03:22:54 AM »
Wish granted. You now do everything at the exact time the notion enters your head. This leads to many awkward moments.

I wish for perfect vision.
Currently playing:
Forte Lulz, Chaotic EVIL Bard bent on world domination;
Canere Potentia, to sing of power.
Aralaxax, Warforged Osteomancer, Machines are my people, I wield bones as other wield swords.
Randall Gray, she's not sexually confused, honest!
Zion "I can make followers, but why bother when people line up for me?"
Currently DMing: Real Men Use Their Hands, World's Largest Dungeon
"If you can pretend to be a half-orc barbarian or a dwarf wizard then you can pretend to be an alpha male."-Ninjarabbit
"The hotel shop only had two decent books, and I'd written both of them."-Douglas Adams
"It's funny how the Earth never opens up and swallows you when you want it to." Xander Harris, Buffy the Vampire Slayer

skydragonknight

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 3297
Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #4 on: November 24, 2008, 05:04:07 AM »
Wish granted! You see everything at the molecular level, even miles away! Unfortunately, you have no idea what it is you're looking at.

I wish for two scoops of vanilla ice cream with strawberry syrup.
It always seems like the barrels around here have something in them.

RobbyPants

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 7139
Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #5 on: November 24, 2008, 02:32:53 PM »
Wish granted!  You have no bowl or spoon; just a messy lap.

I wish I could freeze time in the middle of the night to get eight hours of sleep in those short, two-hour windows my daughter gives me.
My balancing 3.5 compendium
Elemental mage test game

Quotes
[spoiler]
Quote from: Cafiend
It is a shame stupidity isn't painful.
Quote from: StormKnight
Totally true.  Historians believe that most past civilizations would have endured for centuries longer if they had successfully determined Batman's alignment.
Quote from: Grand Theft Otto
Why are so many posts on the board the equivalent of " Dear Dr. Crotch, I keep punching myself in the crotch, and my groin hurts... what should I do? How can I make my groin stop hurting?"
Quote from: CryoSilver
I suggest carving "Don't be a dick" into him with a knife.  A dull, rusty knife.  A dull, rusty, bent, flaming knife.
Quote from: Seerow
Fluffy: It's over Steve! I've got the high ground!
Steve: You underestimate my power!
Fluffy: Don't try it, Steve!
Steve: *charges*
Fluffy: *three critical strikes*
Steve: ****
Quote from: claypigeons
I don't even stat out commoners. Commoner = corpse that just isn't a zombie. Yet.
Quote from: CryoSilver
When I think "Old Testament Boots of Peace" I think of a paladin curb-stomping an orc and screaming "Your death brings peace to this land!"
Quote from: Orville_Oaksong
Buy a small country. Or Pelor. Both are good investments.
[/spoiler]

skydragonknight

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 3297
Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #6 on: November 24, 2008, 04:46:57 PM »
You have frozen time for both you and the room you sleep in. Unfortunately, you can't unfreeze time, and the rest of the world wonders where you and your room went. If you try to leave the room, you remember that velocity is preserved and you are currently moving at near-infinite velocity(for our purposes, we will cap your movement at the speed of light). If this is your choice, the particles of your body leave the room at the speed of light at a right angle to the surface of the Earth--they will eventually enter outer space, as they are traveling well above escape velocity, but not before disturbing a massive amount of air and matter, creating the equivalent of an atomic bomb's worth of disturbance on the air, destroying your house and, if you live in an urban area, the entire urban area.
As the particles continue to fly off the ground they cause similar disturbances to the many layers of atmosphere, destroying all wind patterns on the planet and creating a series of giant storms which destroy a good chunk of the life on the planet before normalizing 10 years later.
I hope you had a good night's sleep.

I wish to possess some Apocalypse Insurance for me and my close relatives.
Note that you do have the choice to stay in your room for all of the eternity of .01 seconds and rot.
« Last Edit: November 24, 2008, 04:48:47 PM by skydragonknight »
It always seems like the barrels around here have something in them.

RobbyPants

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 7139
Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #7 on: November 24, 2008, 05:37:36 PM »
Wish granted!  You pay a small fortune each month for your Apocalypse Insurance.  As time goes on, there is no Apocalypse, which is gernally a good thing, but it makes you wonder if you should have spent hundreds of thousands of dollars on insurance.  But who knows?  That Apocalypse might be right around the corner!

I wish the roads weren't slippery when they are icy and snowy.

I hope you had a good night's sleep.
You know, right now, that doesn't sound that bad.  I might regret the decision eight to ten hours later...  :smirk
My balancing 3.5 compendium
Elemental mage test game

Quotes
[spoiler]
Quote from: Cafiend
It is a shame stupidity isn't painful.
Quote from: StormKnight
Totally true.  Historians believe that most past civilizations would have endured for centuries longer if they had successfully determined Batman's alignment.
Quote from: Grand Theft Otto
Why are so many posts on the board the equivalent of " Dear Dr. Crotch, I keep punching myself in the crotch, and my groin hurts... what should I do? How can I make my groin stop hurting?"
Quote from: CryoSilver
I suggest carving "Don't be a dick" into him with a knife.  A dull, rusty knife.  A dull, rusty, bent, flaming knife.
Quote from: Seerow
Fluffy: It's over Steve! I've got the high ground!
Steve: You underestimate my power!
Fluffy: Don't try it, Steve!
Steve: *charges*
Fluffy: *three critical strikes*
Steve: ****
Quote from: claypigeons
I don't even stat out commoners. Commoner = corpse that just isn't a zombie. Yet.
Quote from: CryoSilver
When I think "Old Testament Boots of Peace" I think of a paladin curb-stomping an orc and screaming "Your death brings peace to this land!"
Quote from: Orville_Oaksong
Buy a small country. Or Pelor. Both are good investments.
[/spoiler]

Vynar

  • Barbary Macaque at the Rock of Gibraltar
  • ***
  • Posts: 205
    • Email
Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #8 on: November 26, 2008, 12:18:51 PM »
Granted! They are instead slippery under normal circumstances.

I wish to finally master my dream invention and patent it! THE HOVER-SANDWICH!

skydragonknight

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 3297
Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #9 on: November 26, 2008, 03:12:58 PM »
Wish granted! The sandwich is actually a psion that has permanently mindswitched itself with the sandwich. It is hovering do to it's telekinesis power. It takes control of your mind and you never think a thought for yourself ever again.

I wish for a Death Star.
It always seems like the barrels around here have something in them.

InnaBinder

  • Grape ape
  • *****
  • Posts: 1610
  • OnnaTable
    • Okay - - Your Turn: Monte Cook's Message Board
Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #10 on: November 26, 2008, 03:26:17 PM »
Wish granted!  The sun explodes.  Thanks.   :banghead

I wish to be on a different habitable planet when the sun obliterates life on earth.
Winning an argument on the internet is like winning in the Special Olympics.  You won, but you're still retarded.

I made a Handbook!?

skydragonknight

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 3297
Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #11 on: November 26, 2008, 04:22:01 PM »
Wish granted! Said planet is inside a tiny galaxy in a gem that a cat wears around it's neck. The cat happens to be on Earth when the Sun explodes, so your entire galaxy(and you along with it it) is destroyed.

I wish to be a Man in Black, similar to J & K in the movie "Men in Black."
It always seems like the barrels around here have something in them.

j0lt

  • Hong Kong
  • ****
  • Posts: 1317
  • Browncoat
Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #12 on: November 26, 2008, 04:41:38 PM »
Granted!  You unfortunately broke your special glasses moments before the mind wipe device and can no longer remember.

I wish I could understand what animals were saying.
PbP Games
The Artifact (prologue) as Dr. Henry Loder, Mayan archaeologist


RobbyPants

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 7139
Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #13 on: November 26, 2008, 05:33:38 PM »
Wish granted!  They all hate you and aren't shy about it.

I wish I could switch the number of vacation days I have per year and the number of days I have to work, but still get paid the same!  :p
My balancing 3.5 compendium
Elemental mage test game

Quotes
[spoiler]
Quote from: Cafiend
It is a shame stupidity isn't painful.
Quote from: StormKnight
Totally true.  Historians believe that most past civilizations would have endured for centuries longer if they had successfully determined Batman's alignment.
Quote from: Grand Theft Otto
Why are so many posts on the board the equivalent of " Dear Dr. Crotch, I keep punching myself in the crotch, and my groin hurts... what should I do? How can I make my groin stop hurting?"
Quote from: CryoSilver
I suggest carving "Don't be a dick" into him with a knife.  A dull, rusty knife.  A dull, rusty, bent, flaming knife.
Quote from: Seerow
Fluffy: It's over Steve! I've got the high ground!
Steve: You underestimate my power!
Fluffy: Don't try it, Steve!
Steve: *charges*
Fluffy: *three critical strikes*
Steve: ****
Quote from: claypigeons
I don't even stat out commoners. Commoner = corpse that just isn't a zombie. Yet.
Quote from: CryoSilver
When I think "Old Testament Boots of Peace" I think of a paladin curb-stomping an orc and screaming "Your death brings peace to this land!"
Quote from: Orville_Oaksong
Buy a small country. Or Pelor. Both are good investments.
[/spoiler]

Vynar

  • Barbary Macaque at the Rock of Gibraltar
  • ***
  • Posts: 205
    • Email
Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #14 on: November 26, 2008, 09:53:58 PM »
Granted! You make the same hourly wage, to bad that does not add up to much and you will be fired for wasting your boss's time if you try to work overtime. He pulled a lot of strings to get you that vacation time and does not like to feel unappreciated.

I wish for a gun that fired monkeys equipped with the same monkey firing weapon.

BobismyRhino

  • Hong Kong
  • ****
  • Posts: 1051
  • *baby Bob kiss* MUAH!
    • Email
Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #15 on: November 27, 2008, 02:41:35 AM »
Wish granted. You fire the gun and a monkey with another monkey with a monkey-firing-gun appears... and makes more and more monkeys with guns. When they're not making more monkeys with their guns, they're throwing poo...at you, and only you...
I hate you a little for that wish. That was REALLY hard for me to keep straight!

Anyway,
I wish I could sell all of my stuff for at least half of the price that I bought it for. 

People usually think that I've lost my mind. I haven't lost it, I know exactly where it is: the gutter.

My body is a temple. That is why I make chocolate sacrifices in it every day.

Chemus

  • Donkey Kong
  • ****
  • Posts: 751
Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #16 on: November 27, 2008, 04:09:00 AM »
Wish Granted! You succeed in selling all of your stuff; clothes, computer, etc, but nobody is willing to sell you any more goods. They'll sell you food, but not stuff. Enjoy! ;)

I wish that I was able to choose nice, thoughtful gifts for folks.
*waves hand* This is not the sig you're looking for...
The freely downloadable and searchable 3.5 SRD I prefer (Web)
Camlen, Enniwey

RobbyPants

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 7139
Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #17 on: November 27, 2008, 05:21:47 AM »
Wish granted.  Some of those gifts cost a lot of money, and you really wish you could buy them.

I wish at Thanksgiving tomorow, I could eat all the turkey, potatos, and gravy I want without getting full.
My balancing 3.5 compendium
Elemental mage test game

Quotes
[spoiler]
Quote from: Cafiend
It is a shame stupidity isn't painful.
Quote from: StormKnight
Totally true.  Historians believe that most past civilizations would have endured for centuries longer if they had successfully determined Batman's alignment.
Quote from: Grand Theft Otto
Why are so many posts on the board the equivalent of " Dear Dr. Crotch, I keep punching myself in the crotch, and my groin hurts... what should I do? How can I make my groin stop hurting?"
Quote from: CryoSilver
I suggest carving "Don't be a dick" into him with a knife.  A dull, rusty knife.  A dull, rusty, bent, flaming knife.
Quote from: Seerow
Fluffy: It's over Steve! I've got the high ground!
Steve: You underestimate my power!
Fluffy: Don't try it, Steve!
Steve: *charges*
Fluffy: *three critical strikes*
Steve: ****
Quote from: claypigeons
I don't even stat out commoners. Commoner = corpse that just isn't a zombie. Yet.
Quote from: CryoSilver
When I think "Old Testament Boots of Peace" I think of a paladin curb-stomping an orc and screaming "Your death brings peace to this land!"
Quote from: Orville_Oaksong
Buy a small country. Or Pelor. Both are good investments.
[/spoiler]

j0lt

  • Hong Kong
  • ****
  • Posts: 1317
  • Browncoat
Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #18 on: November 27, 2008, 05:28:40 AM »
Wish granted, but when you are offered a single thin wafer for dessert, you explode!

I wish I had more motivation...  :bigeye
PbP Games
The Artifact (prologue) as Dr. Henry Loder, Mayan archaeologist


Vynar

  • Barbary Macaque at the Rock of Gibraltar
  • ***
  • Posts: 205
    • Email
Re: Wish Granted!
« Reply #19 on: November 27, 2008, 10:28:17 AM »
Granted! Your life is now dominated by an intense desire to become Britney Spears!

I wish for a magic toaster named Jim the Warmonger who is really a nice guy.