Author Topic: How do I eat people and get away with it?  (Read 16022 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Prak, the Mad

  • Donkey Kong
  • ****
  • Posts: 648
    • Email
How do I eat people and get away with it?
« on: November 22, 2008, 10:25:24 PM »
I play a weekly runequest (4) game...
So, in the last session, I got chaos tainted and now am in a situation where I need to eat 25 lbs of the flesh of a sentient creature or loose a point of power (the characteristic that fuels magic, I'm a shaman) each day... chaos is BAD, at least culturally, metaphysically it's just entropy, but it's the world's big bad, and now I'm an agent. How do I eat people and get away with it?

Bozwevial

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 4497
  • Developing a relaxed attitude to danger.
Re: How do I eat people and get away with it?
« Reply #1 on: November 22, 2008, 10:33:17 PM »
Don't let everyone else find out.

Other than that, you could try explaining to everyone why you have to do this, but as Frank and K said, "You fix the roofs of twenty people, you're Jimmy the Helpful Thatcher. You eat the miller's daughter, you're Jimmy the Cannibal, and no amount of roof-fixing is going to change that."

Shoggoth

  • That monkey with the orange ass cheeks
  • ****
  • Posts: 246
    • Email
Re: How do I eat people and get away with it?
« Reply #2 on: November 22, 2008, 10:38:10 PM »
So your character has to eat 25 lbs. of sentient flesh, each day, or lose a point of power?  How much power does a standard character have in runequest?  Is 1 point a little bit or a lot?  And how will your character keep his/her trim physique while pounding back 100 Quarter Pound cheeseburgers a day?

Seriously though, how you deal with it all depends on your gaming group.  Is there a way to get untainted?  If so, I'd say the group should probably start working on that.  Is your character permanently stuck eating an entire McDonalds lunch rush each day just to keep his power up?  That's kind of brutal, and if the other player characters have a problem with it you're not going to be able to hide it long.  How attached to this character are you?

I don't really know how Runequest works, but does the taint create a need in the character to do this, or do you just know that you have to or lose points?  If the character is compelled to do it, then I guess you're stuck, but if you just know and the character doesn't want to do it then you should probably get some help.  But if it's permanent?  Maybe the GM should invoke Rule 0 and give you a way out, because it's kind of an untenable position if you don't want to play out the character's downfall.
Still came that eldritch, mocking cry - "Tekeli-li! Tekeli-li!" and at last we remembered that the demoniac Shoggoths...had no voice save the imitated accents of their bygone masters.

Prak, the Mad

  • Donkey Kong
  • ****
  • Posts: 648
    • Email
Re: How do I eat people and get away with it?
« Reply #3 on: November 22, 2008, 10:51:06 PM »
Yeah, I'm thinking it'll be best to hide it.

Quote from: shoggoth
So your character has to eat 25 lbs. of sentient flesh, each day, or lose a point of power?  How much power does a standard character have in runequest?  Is 1 point a little bit or a lot?
average power for a human is 11-ish, I have a 15.

Quote
And how will your character keep his/her trim physique while pounding back 100 Quarter Pound cheeseburgers a day?
it's magically cnverted, kinda like blood into vitae in VtM

Quote
eriously though, how you deal with it all depends on your gaming group.  Is there a way to get untainted?
yes, but it's difficult.

Quote
I'd say the group should probably start working on that.  Is your character permanently stuck eating an entire McDonalds lunch rush each day just to keep his power up?  That's kind of brutal, and if the other player characters have a problem with it you're not going to be able to hide it long.
fortunately, I'm a shaman and no other character knows anything about shamans, so I can lie my ass off about the reason, and say it has to do with being a shaman.

Quote
How attached to this character are you?
fortunately, not very

Quote
I don't really know how Runequest works, but does the taint create a need in the character to do this, or do you just know that you have to or lose points?
I just know, I can resist, but then I become less effective.

Quote
If the character is compelled to do it, then I guess you're stuck, but if you just know and the character doesn't want to do it then you should probably get some help.  But if it's permanent?  Maybe the GM should invoke Rule 0 and give you a way out, because it's kind of an untenable position if you don't want to play out the character's downfall.
GM won't do that, he's trying t challenge me, and this is the consequence of my short-sightedness. Sounds harsh, but, well, I'm up to it. I also really don't mind having to eat people, I mind possibly getting killed for having to do so. Hell, if it comes down to it, I can eat the armour we just looted from an enemy as it's human hide, but I don't want to do that, because it's the only armour any of us have, and it's mine because, well, armour is armour, flesh is flesh.

EjoThims

  • Grape ape
  • *****
  • Posts: 1945
  • The Ferret
    • Email
Re: How do I eat people and get away with it?
« Reply #4 on: November 23, 2008, 07:26:00 AM »
If there's an equivalent to the spell 'awaken,' just make a cow intelligent and then munch of that for a couple weeks.

The_Mad_Linguist

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 8780
  • Simulated Thing
Re: How do I eat people and get away with it?
« Reply #5 on: November 23, 2008, 08:40:15 AM »
Get connections.  Hide bodies for people. 

You can eat *more* than 25 pounds a day, right?  Not *exactly* 25 pounds.
Linguist, Mad, Unique, none of these things am I
My custom class: The Priest of the Unseen Host
Planetouched Handbook
Want to improve your character?  Then die.

Omen of Peace

  • Hong Kong
  • ****
  • Posts: 1053
  • Wise Madman
Re: How do I eat people and get away with it?
« Reply #6 on: November 23, 2008, 12:23:41 PM »
Target people that nobody will miss. Homeless people, solitary old widows...  :devil
The Malazan Book of the Fallen, Steven Erikson

Dilvish

  • Ring-Tailed Lemur
  • **
  • Posts: 40
Re: How do I eat people and get away with it?
« Reply #7 on: November 23, 2008, 03:00:25 PM »
You could try to find some kind of chaotic creature that can regenerate and capture it, or make a deal with it if it's big and powerful.

Sunic_Flames

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 4782
  • The Crusader of Logic.
Re: How do I eat people and get away with it?
« Reply #8 on: November 23, 2008, 03:56:24 PM »
Eat a troll.
Smiting Imbeciles since 1985.

If you hear this music, run.

And don't forget:


There is no greater contribution than Hi Welcome.

Huge amounts of people are fuckwits. That doesn't mean that fuckwit is a valid lifestyle.

IP proofing and avoiding being CAPed OR - how to make characters relevant in the long term.

Friends don't let friends be Short Bus Hobos.

[spoiler]
Sunic may be more abrasive than sandpaper coated in chainsaws (not that its a bad thing, he really does know what he's talking about), but just posting in this thread without warning and telling him he's an asshole which, if you knew his past experiences on WotC and Paizo is flat-out uncalled for. Never mind the insults (which are clearly 4Chan-level childish). You say people like Sunic are the bane of the internet? Try looking at your own post and telling me you are better than him.

Here's a fun fact: You aren't. By a few leagues.
[/spoiler]

skydragonknight

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 3297
Re: How do I eat people and get away with it?
« Reply #9 on: November 23, 2008, 04:55:25 PM »
It always seems like the barrels around here have something in them.

Sinfire Titan

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 5697
  • You've got one round to give a rat's ass.
    • Email
Re: How do I eat people and get away with it?
« Reply #10 on: November 23, 2008, 11:22:29 PM »
Start with a blowjob, and work your way up.

 :D


[spoiler][/spoiler]

Sunic_Flames

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 4782
  • The Crusader of Logic.
Re: How do I eat people and get away with it?
« Reply #11 on: November 24, 2008, 12:06:52 PM »
Start with a blowjob, and work your way up.

 :D

 :lmao
Smiting Imbeciles since 1985.

If you hear this music, run.

And don't forget:


There is no greater contribution than Hi Welcome.

Huge amounts of people are fuckwits. That doesn't mean that fuckwit is a valid lifestyle.

IP proofing and avoiding being CAPed OR - how to make characters relevant in the long term.

Friends don't let friends be Short Bus Hobos.

[spoiler]
Sunic may be more abrasive than sandpaper coated in chainsaws (not that its a bad thing, he really does know what he's talking about), but just posting in this thread without warning and telling him he's an asshole which, if you knew his past experiences on WotC and Paizo is flat-out uncalled for. Never mind the insults (which are clearly 4Chan-level childish). You say people like Sunic are the bane of the internet? Try looking at your own post and telling me you are better than him.

Here's a fun fact: You aren't. By a few leagues.
[/spoiler]

Prak, the Mad

  • Donkey Kong
  • ****
  • Posts: 648
    • Email
Re: How do I eat people and get away with it?
« Reply #12 on: November 24, 2008, 06:00:51 PM »
Thanks for the suggestions, I made a go of it the other night, and succeeded in getting my first meal, up to the "escape" part, and I didn't think about the fact that I'd be covered in blood... I wound up going to the tavern where my character got the crap kicked out of him in the first session for "cultural differences" (before he became a cannibal) and seduced the pretty young barmaid, and killed her and ate 50 lbs of flesh(had to make up for the previous day). I then covered the remaining 50 lbs in tallow and wrapped it in cloth and stuck it in my bag. Bones got stashed under the bed (oh, fun fact, this all happened in the room that a "nun" got killed in the first game... I'm pretty sure that room is getting boarded up or burned down...) and I went out the door. The npc healer that just joined the group passed me in the hall and wondered what the hell was going on... I tried to get myself under her protection by claiming disease, but it wound up as claiming possession... yeah, in a ancient/midevil society... guess what form exorcisms take?

oh, extra fun fact, the pretty young barmaid was the inn keeper's daughter, so even in death I got my revenge for him stabbing me...

emissary666

  • King Kong
  • ****
  • Posts: 902
    • Email
Re: How do I eat people and get away with it?
« Reply #13 on: November 25, 2008, 09:25:29 PM »
Cannibalism for Dummies

1: Find target
2: Get target alone
Optional: If target is young, hot female, have sex first
3: Kill target
4: Eat
5: Take a shower or bath
6: Hide body
7: Run as fast as you can
I make little kids cry
Steady As A Goat
Warning: You may have already been set on fire

Bread does not need a reason

Sinfire Titan

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 5697
  • You've got one round to give a rat's ass.
    • Email
Re: How do I eat people and get away with it?
« Reply #14 on: November 26, 2008, 10:01:56 AM »
Cannibalism for Dummies

1: Find target
2: Get target alone
Optional: If target is young, hot female, have sex first
3: Kill target
4: Eat
5: Take a shower or bath
6: Hide body
7: Run as fast as you can

You're doing it wrong!

There should never be a body that can be identified.


[spoiler][/spoiler]

archangel.arcanis

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 2938
    • Email
Re: How do I eat people and get away with it?
« Reply #15 on: November 26, 2008, 01:39:13 PM »
well it is too late to help that character but another option, depending on spells available, would be to use reincarnate (druid spell from phb) on your victim. It costs some money but then they have a new body and you have food for tomorrow too.  :smirk

Obviously a regenerating creature is the best bet, as mentioned before. Remember next time eat the whole body and put max ranks in bluff. "help a demon just killed the girl i was flirting with earlier!!  ;)"
Clerics and Druids are like the 4 and 2 in 42. Together they are the answer to the ultimate question in D&D.
Retire the character before the DM smacks you with the Table as the book will feel totally inadequate now.-Hazren

Prime32

  • Administrator
  • Organ Grinder
  • *
  • Posts: 7534
  • Modding since 03/12/10
Re: How do I eat people and get away with it?
« Reply #16 on: November 26, 2008, 05:11:53 PM »
well it is too late to help that character but another option, depending on spells available, would be to use reincarnate (druid spell from phb) on your victim. It costs some money but then they have a new body and you have food for tomorrow too.  :smirk

Obviously a regenerating creature is the best bet, as mentioned before. Remember next time eat the whole body and put max ranks in bluff. "help a demon just killed the girl i was flirting with earlier!!  ;)"
He's playing Runescape ;)
My work
The tier system in a nutshell:
[spoiler]Tier 6: A cartographer.
Tier 5: An expert cartographer or a decent marksman.
Tier 4: An expert marksman.
Tier 3: An expert marksman, cartographer and chef who can tie strong knots and is trained in hostage negotiation or a marksman so good he can shoot down every bullet fired by a minigun while armed with a rusted single-shot pistol that veers to the left.
Tier 2: Someone with teleportation, mind control, time manipulation, intangibility, the ability to turn into an exact duplicate of anything, or the ability to see into the future with perfect accuracy.
Tier 1: Someone with teleportation, mind control, time manipulation, intangibility, the ability to turn into an exact duplicate of anything and the ability to see into the future with perfect accuracy.[/spoiler]

Straw_Man

  • Hong Kong
  • ****
  • Posts: 1145
    • Email
Re: How do I eat people and get away with it?
« Reply #17 on: November 26, 2008, 05:20:43 PM »
well it is too late to help that character but another option, depending on spells available, would be to use reincarnate (druid spell from phb) on your victim. It costs some money but then they have a new body and you have food for tomorrow too.  :smirk

Obviously a regenerating creature is the best bet, as mentioned before. Remember next time eat the whole body and put max ranks in bluff. "help a demon just killed the girl i was flirting with earlier!!  ;)"

Victim must be willing to reincarnate as well. Perhaps a trunk enchanted to prevent decay and odour, if such a thing is possible in Runescape?
"No, no, don't think, Maya." Ritsuko chided. "We will not gattai the Evas or their pilots.

Such thoughts lead inevitably to transformation sequences."

Shoggoth

  • That monkey with the orange ass cheeks
  • ****
  • Posts: 246
    • Email
Re: How do I eat people and get away with it?
« Reply #18 on: November 26, 2008, 05:25:40 PM »
Take a job as undertaker in a busy crime-ridden city.  Fill all coffins with rocks.  Problem solved!
Still came that eldritch, mocking cry - "Tekeli-li! Tekeli-li!" and at last we remembered that the demoniac Shoggoths...had no voice save the imitated accents of their bygone masters.

Kuroimaken

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 6733
Re: How do I eat people and get away with it?
« Reply #19 on: December 17, 2008, 10:36:52 AM »
Wine your victims, THEN dine them.

...what?
Gendou Ikari is basically Gregory House in Kaminashades. This is FACT.

For proof, look here:

http://www.layoutjelly.com/image_27/gendo_ikari/

[SPOILER]
Which Final Fantasy Character Are You?
Final Fantasy 7
My Unitarian Jihad Name is: Brother Katana of Enlightenment.
Get yours.[/SPOILER]

I HAVE BROKEN THE 69 INTERNETS BARRIER!