Paradoxus (emissary666) vs. Ice Guy (Prime32)

[Prime32]

Space, filled with stars. Galaxies and planets sweep by, then there is a flash and we find ourselves in a plane of red soup where moon-sized predators fill our ears with wailing. Another flash, and we briefly find ourselves in a vast city before hurtling through an asteroid belt. The bursts of light come faster and faster until we come to our final view.

Floating in a rainbow void is an asteroid upon which sits a great dome. We zoom in and see a smaller, translucent dome within it. As two men walk into this dome, the asteroid erupts with cheering.

"Welcome, fans, to the third Pan-Dimensional Tournament!"

Destined Winner
[spoiler]Paradoxus (emissary666)[/spoiler]

[emissary666]

Out of nothing a humanoid figure folds out, while folding back in. He bows to the crowds insultingly and turns to his opponent.

[Prime32]

A dark-haired man in blue clothing walks towards the inner "bubble". He scratches his head and faces his opponent with a grin.

The announcer's voice rings out over the stadium. "Alright, now let me explain the rules to the new-comers in the audience. Once both contestants have entered the arena, it will be sealed and expanded, increasing its internal space for the contestants. The arena's Spatial Barrier protects spectators from even the most spectacular displays of power, while giving them the best possible view of the action. The first combatant rendered unable to fight for 1 minute will be declared the victor. There are no restrictions on the type of abilities which can be used."

"Contestants! Are you ready?"
Both nod and the crowd cheers.

"Enter the arena!"
The two step towards the bubble and pass through it, sending ripples across its surface.

A bearded man steps forward on a balcony overlooking the arena. He raises his hand and shouts "Barrier... Expansion!"

The bubble fogs, then glows. The contestants experience a brief sense of nausea, then find themselves in a much larger space. With flashes of light, large chunks of rock appear floating throughout the interior.

Outside, the surface of the bubble automatically focuses on and magnifies the audience's view of the combatants.

"Let the first match begin!"

[emissary666]

Paradoxus inverts Zeno's Paradox, throwing a punch from across the arena to Ice Guy's stomach.

[Prime32]

Paradoxus inverts Zeno's Paradox, throwing a punch from across the arena to Ice Guy's stomach.

OOC: According to Wikipedia, Zeno had more than one paradox...

Ice Guy is caught off-guard by the speed/stasis of the attack and is knocked back, but soon recovers. He places his hands together, and a blue glow grows between them. He then moves them apart, forming a beam of light. He grasps it with both hands like a sword, then rushes at Paradoxus, attempting to strike him.

[spoiler]Anything touched by his blade is frozen, but it has no physical substance, so it cannot cut.[/spoiler]

[emissary666]

OOC: The paradox of dichotomy

Paradoxus quickly invokes the Fletcher's Paradox, locking Ice Guy in one place. Then, panicking at the icy blade a few inches from his face, Paradoxus invokes the Two Envelope Paradox to conceal himself in one of two boxes before releasing Ice Guy

[Prime32]

Ice Guy pulls his sword apart into two blades, then stabs both boxes simultaneously.

[emissary666]

Paradoxus is shocked and frozen by the attack, but quickly he inverts the fletcher's paradox to free himself and increase his speed. He then throws 1000 punches at Ice Guy.

[Prime32]

As blur of punches land on Ice Guy, and shards of ice scatter into the air.

"Ouch! That's gotta hurt! Wait, what's this? He managed to blunt the attack with ice?"

Ice Guy stands, panting, holding a single blade. He slashes with it, sending out a wave of freezing energy toward Paradoxus.

[emissary666]

Paradoxus shows anger. He decided to unleash his ultimate weapon, a fallacy. He says, "If you are alive, this statement is false" and waits for reality to fix the problem.

[Prime32]

[spoiler]

Paradoxus shows anger. He decided to unleash his ultimate weapon, a fallacy. He says, "If you are alive, this statement is false" and waits for reality to fix the problem.

Umm... it's false. So what? You never said it was true.

I wanted a chance to use my ultimate attack before being defeated, though. And you never responded to the wave of freezing energy heading towards you...
[/spoiler]

[emissary666]

OOC: Sorry

Realizing he forgot about the wave, Paradoxus is hit and is frozen solid. But relying on reality, his words follows into Ice Guy's ears. There is then a terrible pain in Ice Guy's chest, as if something is trying to kill him from the inside out.

ONE MINUTE TILL FALLACY IS RESOLVED

[Prime32]

[spoiler]I still don't get it.
One move to go before the big one.[/spoiler]

Ice Guy clutches his heart and panics. He focuses, and the moisture in the air crystallises around the shaft of light he holds in his hand, transforming it into a solid weapon.

Holding his sword before him, he rushes at the frozen Paradoxus, hoping to stab him before he escapes.

[emissary666]

[spoiler]Paradoxus made a fallacy which stated that if Ice Guy was alive, then that is false. He made that fallacy a hole in the logic of reality, so reality is trying to fix the hole by killing Ice Guy, thereby resolving the fallacy[/spoiler]

Paradoxus panics. He melts the ice by lowering the temperature and gets out of the way, the icy blade grazing his side. He clutches his side and he invokes Achilles Paradox to keep Ice Guy from catching him.

[Prime32]

Ice Guy tries to slash Paradoxus with his blade but he steps out of the way. Discarding its icy sheath, he fires another freezing wave from his sword, but it misses. Seemingly enraged, Ice Guy starts swinging his sword around wildly, releasing a barrage of shots that freeze random parts of the arena.

As Paradoxus dodges a blast, he asks with surprising coolness "How long do you think you can keep this up?"

Paradoxus bends to avoid an attack, reacting a bit slower than he should have. As he does, he catches a glimpse of his side. To his alarm, his wound has frozen, and the ice is visibly spreading over his body.

"Once the ice reaches your heart, you will die. Or maybe your fallacy will kill me first. We'll just have to wait and see." He chuckles and fires a large vertical shockwave at his opponent.

[spoiler]Ice Guy won't use his desperation attack unless Paradoxus presents a great and immediate threat to him. Use a flashy attack, then I'll make my last move.[/spoiler]

[emissary666]

Paradoxus chuckles. "Fletcher's paradox has already stopped the ice." He pulls forward his skin to reveal the ice, only having grown an inch before stopping. "and now I am bored. Let's continue then." Paradoxus then realizes the shockwave and smiles. "every action has an equal and opposite reaction. There not being fire around me therefore means that the must be, for the lack of fire warrants the being of fire." And as the sentence finishes, Paradoxus' body becomes drenched in flames, the shockwave slowly melting away. "And I see no floating blades." Thousands of floating knives appear around him. "And finally, I see your still alive"

THIRTY SECONDS UNTIL FALLACY IS SOLVED

[/i][/b]

[Prime32]

A half-dozen knives shoot towards Ice Guy. He produces a frosty shield, but it cracks on impact and he is struck in multiple places. He falls to his knees, gasping with pain.

"Not much... time left. Looks like I have no... choice. I admit... I'm surprised. I didn't think I'd have to use this." Ice Guy pushes himself up with his sword. "Prepare yourself. This is my ultimate technique!"

He closes and furrows his brow in concentration. Suddenly, the temperature in the arena drops drastically. His sword glows brighter and brighter. Finally, he snaps his eyes open to reveal that they have turned from brown to blue. As he raises his weapon high above his head it radiates brilliant white light. "ABSOLUTE! ZERO!" he screams, plunging it into the ground.

There is a pause, then the ground begins to tear itself apart as crystal ice streams from his sword at an incredible rate. Frozen strands reach the edge of the arena in an instant and continue to travel up the barrier. Paradoxus leaps out of the way of the freezing wave, landing on a patch of ice, but is forced to move again as icy spikes explode from beneath his feet.

"THIS WILL BE YOUR TOMB!"

[spoiler]The ice will cover the entire arena almost immediately. Paradoxus has to attack with full force now.[/spoiler]

[emissary666]

Paradoxus' laugh fills the arena. It gets louder as the flames around him expand. "TIME'S UP"
And with that shards of reality collapse around Ice Guy. Multi colored arms reach out and grab Ice Guy from all directions, trying to tear Ice Guy apart. As they hold him still, a large blade of nothing impales Ice Guy through his stomach. "I win." Paradoxus says, "Fatality, Paradoxus Wins, Flawless Victory"

[Prime32]

"What's this? The arena barrier is freezing over! What could be goin on in- OHHHHHHH!"
There is massive explosion that shatters the ice. Through the smoke, spectators can make out a single figure.

"I think that's game, folks, but who is the winner?"

As the smoke subsides, Paradoxus comes into view, standing over his opponent's limp body. Cheers fill the air.
"Now, let's not be hasty - Ice Guy has one minute to return to the fight."

A large screen activates and displays numbers counting down from 60. When they reach 40, Ice Guy is surrounded by a blur and vanishes.


"Victory by existential failure! The winner of this match is... PARADOXUS!"
The roar of the crowd is deafening.

[emissary666]

Paradoxus bows, and steps up into the ground, disappearing.