Author Topic: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature  (Read 187455 times)

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InnaBinder

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #240 on: April 29, 2009, 10:01:13 AM »
Quote
Okay here's a weird question which I haven't found an answer for anywhere:

Can Squid hear??  My gut answer is no, but I can't find anything that says one way or the other.  They can sense vibrations, but I'm not sure thats the same thing as true hearing.

Technically, no.
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bhu

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #241 on: April 30, 2009, 09:54:11 AM »
Okay I think I have all the abilities up, can anyone think of anything I missed?  I haven't given it a bonus to grapple checks yet, because it's described as being weakly muscled, and its tentacles don't have many suckers on them.  It also sounds somewhat fragile, so I'm debating about what kind of AC Bonus it should get.

InnaBinder

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #242 on: April 30, 2009, 10:10:17 AM »
This is just a gut reaction from having fished a good bit, but letting these things get DR/Slashing or Piercing seems reasonable.
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Prak, the Mad

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #243 on: April 30, 2009, 04:27:41 PM »
are Abner and Bert going to get statted up? that might be worth seeing... and throwing into a campaign...

bhu

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #244 on: May 01, 2009, 06:41:31 AM »
are Abner and Bert going to get statted up? that might be worth seeing... and throwing into a campaign...

I'd have to make a redneck PrC...

InnaBinder

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #245 on: May 01, 2009, 09:55:37 AM »
are Abner and Bert going to get statted up? that might be worth seeing... and throwing into a campaign...

I'd have to make a redneck PrC...
Well, tarnation.  It tain't like them rednecks is hard or nothin.... *IB goes off to cook up some possum stew*
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bhu

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #246 on: May 03, 2009, 09:53:44 AM »
This is just a gut reaction from having fished a good bit, but letting these things get DR/Slashing or Piercing seems reasonable.

They're described as being almost jelly like and fragile though.

It should be all done now except for possible alterations, and a CR>
« Last Edit: May 03, 2009, 09:58:01 AM by bhu »

bhu

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #247 on: May 05, 2009, 08:56:37 AM »
Think CR 2 is okay for the Squid?

How big would you like the Gulper Eel?

Prak, the Mad

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #248 on: May 06, 2009, 05:17:12 PM »
I'd say huge or larger would be good for the gulper eel, that way it can easily swallow most adventurers

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #249 on: May 06, 2009, 05:20:02 PM »
I'd say huge or larger would be good for the gulper eel, that way it can easily swallow most adventurers
There are reports of those things swallowing creatures larger than themselves and having their stomachs explode.

...so, Gape of the Serpent as a bonus feat? :D
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The tier system in a nutshell:
[spoiler]Tier 6: A cartographer.
Tier 5: An expert cartographer or a decent marksman.
Tier 4: An expert marksman.
Tier 3: An expert marksman, cartographer and chef who can tie strong knots and is trained in hostage negotiation or a marksman so good he can shoot down every bullet fired by a minigun while armed with a rusted single-shot pistol that veers to the left.
Tier 2: Someone with teleportation, mind control, time manipulation, intangibility, the ability to turn into an exact duplicate of anything, or the ability to see into the future with perfect accuracy.
Tier 1: Someone with teleportation, mind control, time manipulation, intangibility, the ability to turn into an exact duplicate of anything and the ability to see into the future with perfect accuracy.[/spoiler]

Radmelon

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #250 on: May 06, 2009, 10:52:06 PM »
I'd say huge or larger would be good for the gulper eel, that way it can easily swallow most adventurers
There are reports of those things swallowing creatures larger than themselves and having their stomachs explode.

...so, Gape of the Serpent as a bonus feat? :D

Absolutely!

(Finally! something I know about!)

bhu

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #251 on: May 07, 2009, 08:59:27 AM »
Dire Kitty
                      Medium Animal
Hit Dice:             3d8+6 (19 hp)
Initiative:           +3
Speed:                40 ft. (8 squares), Climb 20 ft.
Armor Class:          15 (+3 Dex, +2 Natural), touch 13, flat-footed 12
Base Attack/Grapple:  +2/+5
Attack:               Claw +5 melee (1d4+3)
Full Attack:          2 Claws +5 melee (1d4+3) and 1 Bite +0 melee (1d6+1)
Space/Reach:          5 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks:      Improved Grab, Rake
Special Qualities:    Low Light Vision, Scent
Saves:                Fort +5, Ref +6, Will +2
Abilities:            Str 16, Dex 16, Con 14, Int 2, Wis 12, Cha 8
Skills:               Balance +11, Climb +11, Hide +8, Jump +11, Listen +5, Move Silently +8, Spot +5
Feats:                Alertness, Run
Environment:          Temperate Plains
Organization:         Domesticated or Solitary
Challenge Rating:     2
Treasure:             None
Alignment:            Always Neutral
Advancement:          4-6 HD (Medium)
Level Adjustment:     ---

"Are you sure we should be robbin' an old woman Abner?  She might have cats.  I hate cats.  They always yowl and scratch me."

"Don't be such a wuss Bert."

"Hisssssssssssssssssssssssss..."

"I'm sorry Abner I couldn't hear you over the sound of me shittin' mah self.  Could you repeat that?"


No one is sure if Dire Housecats occurred naturally, or they were the result of specialized breeding, or magic.  But they make darned excellent watchcats.  Now they may cause a little property damage if someone enters your house, but at least the burglars will get what they have coming.

Improved Grab (Ex): If the Dire Kitty hits with it's Claw Attack, it can make a Grapple Check as a Free Action without provoking an Attack of Opportunity. If successful it can Rake.

Rake (Ex): In Grapples the Dire Kitty has two additional Rake attacks (to hit and damage are same as claw attack).

Skills (Ex): Dire Kitties get a +4 Racial Bonus to all Climb, Hide, and Move Silently Checks, and may always Take 10 on a Climb Check.  In addition they may use their Dexterity modifier or Strength modifier for Climb checks, whichever is better.  They also have a +8 Racial Bonus to Balance and Jump Checks.

Combat: Dire Kitties fight in a manner common to regular housecats.  They hiss until their opponent leaves.  If that fails it's the usual pounce, grab, rakerakerakerake...

« Last Edit: May 09, 2009, 08:08:04 AM by bhu »

bhu

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #252 on: May 07, 2009, 09:09:35 AM »
http://www.seasky.org/deep-sea/gulper-eel.html

                      Dire Gulper Eel
                      Large Animal
Hit Dice:             6d8+6 (33 hp)
Initiative:           +1
Speed:                Swim 30 ft. (6 squares)
Armor Class:          13 (-1 Size, +1 Dex, +3 Natural), touch 10, flat-footed 12
Base Attack/Grapple:  +4/+11
Attack:               Bite +6 melee (1d6+3)
Full Attack:          Bite +6 melee (1d6+3)
Space/Reach:          10 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks:      Improved Grab, Swallow Whole
Special Qualities:    Low Light Vision, Blindsense
Saves:                Fort +6, Ref +6, Will +3
Abilities:            Str 16, Dex 12, Con 13, Int 1, Wis 12, Cha 2
Skills:               Hide +6, Move Silently +8
Feats:                Improved Initiative, Skill Focus: Hide, Stealthy
Environment:          Any Aquatic
Organization:         Solitary
Challenge Rating:     2
Treasure:             None
Alignment:            Always Neutral
Advancement:          7-12 HD (Large)
Level Adjustment:     ---

"Bert...I don't like bein' on subs Bert.  I can see things.  Outside the window.  Horrible things that stare at me."

"I think you've been reading too many of those horror novels again."

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!"

"WHAT! What's going on? What's happening?"

"A big fish just ate a bigger fish!

"Yer killin' me Abner..."

"Aw crap it's lookin' at us!"


Dire Gulper Eels are remarkably stealthy predators for their size.

Swallow Whole (Ex): The Dire Gulper Eel may swallow opponents in one of two ways.  First, if it succeeds in biting an opponent up to 1 Size Class larger than itself, it may make a Grapple Check as a Free Action without provoking an Attack of Opportunity.  If successful, it may Swallow it's opponent the next round. 

It may also make a charge attack with it's mouth open, and attempt to swallow any opponent in the way so long as those opponents are at least 2 Size Classes smaller than itself.  A Dire Gulpers stomach can hold up to 1 Huge, 1 Large, 4 Medium, 16 Small, or 32 Tiny or Smaller opponents.  While inside the stomach opponents take 1d6+3 bludgeoning damage, and 1d6 acid damage per round.  A swallowed opponent can cut it's way out by doing 15 points of damage to the Eel's stomach (AC 12) with a light piercing or slashing weapon.  Once the creature exits, muscular action closes the hole, and other swallowed opponents must cut their own way out.

Skills: Dire Gulper Eels have a +8 Racial Bonus to Swim Checks, and may always Take 10 on Swim Checks.  They may also use the Run action while swimming in a straight line.

Combat: Dire Gulper Eels use a light i ntheir tails to lure in unintelligent prey.  For other, more problematic food they just swim at it with their mouths open and hope to swallow it.

« Last Edit: May 12, 2009, 09:13:48 AM by bhu »

Prime32

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #253 on: May 07, 2009, 10:52:38 AM »
Needs the ability to swallow things just by moving through their space (or a full-round action which allows it to move and swallow anything in its path). There's a terrestrial version in one of the MMs.
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The tier system in a nutshell:
[spoiler]Tier 6: A cartographer.
Tier 5: An expert cartographer or a decent marksman.
Tier 4: An expert marksman.
Tier 3: An expert marksman, cartographer and chef who can tie strong knots and is trained in hostage negotiation or a marksman so good he can shoot down every bullet fired by a minigun while armed with a rusted single-shot pistol that veers to the left.
Tier 2: Someone with teleportation, mind control, time manipulation, intangibility, the ability to turn into an exact duplicate of anything, or the ability to see into the future with perfect accuracy.
Tier 1: Someone with teleportation, mind control, time manipulation, intangibility, the ability to turn into an exact duplicate of anything and the ability to see into the future with perfect accuracy.[/spoiler]

bhu

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #254 on: May 09, 2009, 08:11:34 AM »
I'm at a loss as to what to use for skills.  Listen and Spot are generally the default for animals, but the GUlper Eel has little in the way of vision, and it's doubtful it has any hearing.

veekie

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #255 on: May 09, 2009, 04:32:13 PM »
Hide, when it comes out, I think Sneak Attack.
The mind transcends the body.
It's also a little cold because of that.
Please get it a blanket.

I wish I could read your mind,
I can barely read mine.

"Skynet begins to learn at a geometric rate. It becomes self-aware at 2:14 a.m. Eastern time, August 29th. At 2:15, it begins rolling up characters."

[spoiler]
"Just what do you think the moon up in the sky is? Everyone sees that big, round shiny thing and thinks there must be something round up there, right? That's just silly. The truth is much more awesome than that. You can almost never see the real Moon, and its appearance is death to humans. You can only see the Moon when it's reflected in things. And the things it reflects in, like water or glass, can all be broken, right? Since the moon you see in the sky is just being reflected in the heavens, if you tear open the heavens it's easy to break it~"
-Ibuki Suika, on overkill

To sumbolaion diakoneto moi, basilisk ouranionon.
Epigenentheto, apoleia keraune hos timeis pteirei.
Hekatonkatis kai khiliakis astrapsato.
Khiliarkhou Astrape!
[/spoiler]

There is no higher price than 'free'.

"I won't die. I've been ordered not to die."

bhu

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #256 on: May 10, 2009, 06:23:18 AM »
It doesnt need hide though.  At that depth you cant really see anything unless its bioluminescent.  Somehow it's a creature that doesn't appear to have skills as DnD portrays them.  Except swim.  I added the text for Swallow Whole, lemme know if you think it works.

veekie

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #257 on: May 10, 2009, 08:09:05 AM »
It doesnt need hide though.  At that depth you cant really see anything unless its bioluminescent.  Somehow it's a creature that doesn't appear to have skills as DnD portrays them.  Except swim.  I added the text for Swallow Whole, lemme know if you think it works.
Move Silently then.
The mind transcends the body.
It's also a little cold because of that.
Please get it a blanket.

I wish I could read your mind,
I can barely read mine.

"Skynet begins to learn at a geometric rate. It becomes self-aware at 2:14 a.m. Eastern time, August 29th. At 2:15, it begins rolling up characters."

[spoiler]
"Just what do you think the moon up in the sky is? Everyone sees that big, round shiny thing and thinks there must be something round up there, right? That's just silly. The truth is much more awesome than that. You can almost never see the real Moon, and its appearance is death to humans. You can only see the Moon when it's reflected in things. And the things it reflects in, like water or glass, can all be broken, right? Since the moon you see in the sky is just being reflected in the heavens, if you tear open the heavens it's easy to break it~"
-Ibuki Suika, on overkill

To sumbolaion diakoneto moi, basilisk ouranionon.
Epigenentheto, apoleia keraune hos timeis pteirei.
Hekatonkatis kai khiliakis astrapsato.
Khiliarkhou Astrape!
[/spoiler]

There is no higher price than 'free'.

"I won't die. I've been ordered not to die."

bhu

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #258 on: May 12, 2009, 09:20:46 AM »
Dire Vole
                      Tiny Animal
Hit Dice:             1d8+1 (5 hp)
Initiative:           +2
Speed:                20 ft. (4 squares), burrow 15 ft.
Armor Class:          15 (+2 Size, +2 Dex, +1 Natural), touch 14, flat-footed 13
Base Attack/Grapple:  +0/-9
Attack:               Nibble +2 melee (1d2-1)
Full Attack:          Nibble +2 melee (1d2-1)
Space/Reach:          2 1/2 ft./0 ft.
Special Attacks:      -
Special Qualities:    Low Light Vision, Scent
Saves:                Fort +3, Ref +4, Will +1
Abilities:            Str 8, Dex 15, Con 12, Int 2, Wis 12, Cha 4
Skills:               Hide +14, Listen +3, Move Silently +6, Search +4, Spot +3
Feats:                Weapon Finesse
Environment:          Warm or Temperate Plains, Marsh, Hills, Forest, or Mountains   
Organization:      Solitary, Pair, or Colony (6-20)
Challenge Rating:     1/4
Treasure:             None
Alignment:            Always Neutral
Advancement:          2 HD (Small)
Level Adjustment:     ---

"Bert, whut the hell are you doin' up that tree?"

"Thars things in thet thar field Abner! Furry things! They kept lookin' at me and squeakin'!"

"They're rats you fool."

"NO! No thays too big!"

"Dire Rats then."

"They don't have huge nekkid tails! They're some weird mouse critter! Git in tha trees, they can't climb!"

"Bert...are you drunk?"

"..."

"Maybe..."

Voles (also known as Meadow Mice) are pests that inhabit fields.  The Dire versions are somewhat worse being that they're cat sized and tend to be hungrier.

Skills: Dire Voles have a +4 Racial Bonus on Hide and Move Silently Checks, and a +8 Racial Bonus on Search Checks.

Combat: Dire Voles tend to flee combat, unless cornered, or their pups are threatened.  Then they swarm.



bhu

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #259 on: May 13, 2009, 08:52:24 AM »
Giant Urchin
                      Medium Vermin (Aquatic)
Hit Dice:             3d8+9 (22 hp)
Initiative:           -2
Speed:                10 ft. (2 squares), Climb 10 ft.
Armor Class:          16 (-2 Dex, +8 Natural), touch 8, flat-footed 16
Base Attack/Grapple:  +2/+4
Attack:               Spine Jab +4 melee (1d6+2 plus poison)
Full Attack:          Spine Jab +4 melee (1d6+2 plus poison)
Space/Reach:          5 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks:      Spiny Defense, Poison
Special Qualities:    Vermin traits, 360 degree sight, Immunities, Mindless, Recuperate
Saves:                Fort +5, Ref -1, Will +0
Abilities:            Str 14, Dex 6, Con 16, Int -, Wis 10, Cha 2
Skills:               -
Feats:                -
Environment:          Any Aquatic
Organization:         Solitary or Colony (5-10)
Challenge Rating:     2
Treasure:             None
Alignment:            Always Neutral
Advancement:          4-6 HD (Medium)
Level Adjustment:     ---


"Bert?  Let me make sure Ah got this straight.  We're diving into the water nekkid, attacking a poisonous spiny ball, and if we survive we have to haul the damn thing up to the surface and repeat.  All while avoidin' bein' eaten by sharks."

"Yup."

"Howcum we never get normal assignments like beating a buncha Kobolds to death?"

"Have you forgotten the M.A.D.D. lawsuit?"

Apparently even Sea Urchins have Dire forms.  Often harvested as food and for other purposes, divers who confront them have definite problems killing them and bringing them to the surface.  After all they're basically a 200 pound ball of poison spikes.  And when cut up they become new Sea Urchins eventually, making them a plague on some communities.  Even worse Sea Urchins appear to be effectively immune to disease, and don't really age.  So they're effectively immortal unless killed. Unfortunately they are also quite hyperactive compared to their smaller cousins.

Spiny Defense (Ex): Being covered in spikes, Sea Urchins are difficult to attack.  Anything attacking the Urchin in melee without using a Reach weapon takes 1d6 plus it's own Strength Modifier in piercing damage, and is possibly poisoned.

Poison (Ex): Injury or Ingestion, Fort Save DC 14, Initial and Secondary damage is 1d6 Dexterity. 

360 Degree Sight (Ex): Sea Urchins can only really detect variations in light and dark as opposed to actual images.  Nevertheless they can see in pretty much all directions and thus cannot be flanked.  Due to their poor vision they are invulnerable to all attacks/effects requiring them to be able to see.

Immunities (Ex): Sea Urchins are immune to aging effects, disease, flanking, and critical hits.

Recuperate (Ex): A Sea Urchin Regenerates 1 hit point per hour, and can regenerate any significant amount of lost bodily material.  If a significant chunk of it's body is cut away (at least 20%), the piece will heal 1 hit point per hour until it becomes an entirely new Sea Urchin.

Combat: Sea Urchins generally jab opponents and let their venom do the rest of the work.  Once they finally succumb to it the Urchin brings it's grinding mouthplates to bear and devours them.
« Last Edit: May 19, 2009, 08:41:46 AM by bhu »