Author Topic: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature  (Read 149268 times)

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Radmelon

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #260 on: May 15, 2009, 01:55:36 AM »
What.

bhu

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #261 on: May 15, 2009, 12:10:33 PM »
What.

if you are referring to the M.A.D.D. lawsuit/kobold joke, peek in my PrC thread :D

Radmelon

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #262 on: May 16, 2009, 12:08:40 AM »
Not the M.A.D.D., the fact that it's a frickin SEA URCHIN.  :o

PhaedrusXY

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #263 on: May 16, 2009, 12:15:18 AM »
I think you should call that Slow Regeneration ability Not So Fast Healing, instead, to avoid confusion with the standard Regeneration ability (with the subdual damage, and all that).
[spoiler]
A couple of water benders, a dike, a flaming arrow, and a few barrels of blasting jelly?

Sounds like the makings of a gay porn film.
...thanks
[/spoiler]

bhu

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #264 on: May 16, 2009, 01:32:07 AM »
Not the M.A.D.D., the fact that it's a frickin SEA URCHIN.  :o

I had a request :D

bhu

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #265 on: May 16, 2009, 01:34:03 AM »
I think you should call that Slow Regeneration ability Not So Fast Healing, instead, to avoid confusion with the standard Regeneration ability (with the subdual damage, and all that).

Hmm..

True.  I picked regeneration because Sea Urchins seem to be able to recover from virtually any injury, and appear immune to disease.  Unless they are purposefully killed (take them out of the water and mash them maybe?), the damn things just won't die. 

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #266 on: May 20, 2009, 12:02:54 PM »
Dire Whitetail Deer
                      Large Animal
Hit Dice:             6d8+18 (45 hp)
Initiative:           +1
Speed:                50 ft. (10 squares)
Armor Class:          15 (-1 Size, +1 Dex, +5 Natural), touch 10, flat-footed 15
Base Attack/Grapple:  +4/+12
Attack:               Hoof +7 melee (1d6+4) or Gore* +7 melee (1d10+6)
Full Attack:          2 Hooves +7 melee (1d6+4) or Gore* +7 melee (1d10+6)
Space/Reach:          10 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks:      Overrun
Special Qualities:    Low Light Vision, Multiple Stomachs
Saves:                Fort +8, Ref +6, Will +3
Abilities:            Str 18, Dex 13, Con 16, Int 2, Wis 12, Cha 10
Skills:               Listen +6, Spot +5
Feats:                 Endurance, Run, Improved Bull Rush (B)
Environment:          Warm or Temperate Forests or Plains
Organization:         Solitary or Herd (10-30)
Challenge Rating:    2
Treasure:             None
Alignment:            Always Neutral
Advancement:          7-12 HD (Large)
Level Adjustment:     --

*Gore can only be performed by males who have antlers.

"Hot Damn!! We git to go deer huntin'!"

"And we're even gettin' paid for it!"

10 minutes later

"Abner...somethin' seem...odd 'bout these deer to you?"

Dire Whitetail deer are a scourge well known for devouring grass that farmers need for their herds (and sometimes  their crops as well depending on what they're growing).  Many an adventurer has earned money (and a nice relaxing vacation) hunting deer.  Many of these adventurers are also coincidentally redneck Barbarians and Rangers, but still...

Overrun (Ex): If the Dire Whitetail Deer performs an Overrun as part of a charge, it does not provoke an attack of opportunity, and also does 1d8+6 damage  to it's opponent if successful.

Multiple Stomachs (Ex) Dire Whitetail Deer get a +4 Racial Bonus on Fortitude Saves vs Ingested poisons.

Combat: Deer will only fight if necessary or spooked.  usually they run over their opponent while fleeing.

« Last Edit: May 20, 2009, 12:42:47 PM by bhu »

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #267 on: May 22, 2009, 12:56:48 PM »

Dire Muntjac Deer
                      Medium Animal
Hit Dice:             3d8+3 (16 hp)
Initiative:           +3
Speed:                40 ft. (8 squares)
Armor Class:          15 (+3 Dex, +2 Natural), touch 13, flat-footed 12
Base Attack/Grapple:  +2/+12
Attack:               Bite +5 melee (1d6+1)
Full Attack:          Bite +5 melee (1d6+1)
Space/Reach:          5 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks:      -
Special Qualities:    Low Light Vision, Multiple Stomachs
Saves:                Fort +3, Ref +6, Will +2
Abilities:            Str 12, Dex 16, Con 12, Int 2, Wis 12, Cha 8
Skills:               Listen +4, Spot +4
Feats:                Run, Weapon Finesse
Environment:          Warm Forests or Plains
Organization:         Solitary or Group (2-4)
Challenge Rating:    1
Treasure:             None
Alignment:            Always Neutral
Advancement:          4-6 HD (Medium)
Level Adjustment:     --

"This guy says his deer are more normal size like."

"I dunno Abner.  I kinda liked the biggie sized ones.

"Uh...Bert...these deer have teeth."

"All deer have teeth Abner."

"Yeah but these got fangs! OMG they're like lil sharks of the forest!"

Muntjac are normally small asian deer with downward pointing fangs.  Dire Muntjac are a little bigger, and a little more eager to nibble on strangers if ya know what I mean...

Multiple Stomachs (Ex): Dire Muntjac Deer get a +4 Racial Bonus on Fortitude Saves vs Ingested poisons.

Combat:  Muntjac deer tend to nibble experimentally and run away.  Then come back when you're sleeping and nibble harder.  And run away.  Again.  We should probably stop before we're tempted to use profanity...

bhu

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #268 on: May 23, 2009, 11:48:07 AM »
Dire Ostrich
                      Large Animal
Hit Dice:             6d8+24 (51 hp)
Initiative:           +1
Speed:                80 ft. (16 squares)
Armor Class:          15 (-1 Size, +1 Dex, +5 Natural), touch 10, flat-footed 14
Base Attack/Grapple:  +4/+15
Attack:               Kick +10 melee (1d8+7)
Full Attack:          Kick +10 melee (1d8+7)
Space/Reach:          10 ft./10 ft.
Special Attacks:      -
Special Qualities:    Low Light Vision
Saves:                Fort +9, Ref +6, Will +3
Abilities:            Str 24, Dex 12, Con 18, Int 2, Wis 12, Cha 10
Skills:                Listen +9, Spot +10
Feats:                Endurance, Power Attack, Run
Environment:          Warm Plains or Desert
Organization:         Solitary, Pair or Herd (5-50)
Challenge Rating:    2
Treasure:             None
Alignment:            Always Neutral
Advancement:          7-12 HD (Large)
Level Adjustment:     ---

"Maaaan, ah liked the deer huntin'.  Howcum we gotta be out here huntin' birds?"

"Ah never liked me no birds.  Nossir."

"Just ain't no sport in it"

"WAAAAAK"

"Abner...thet ain't no pigeon..."


Dire Ostriches are occasionally farmed for food.  Mostly they're avoided as too dangerous though.  One kick does a serious amount of damage.

Hardy (Ex): Ostriches have a +2 Racial bonus on Fortitude checks to avoid dehydration, or to avoid ill effects from exposure to the elements.

Skills: Ostriches gain a +8 Racial Bonus to Hide checks when lying still in the tall grasses of their native savannah habitat.  They also have a +4 Racial Bonus to Listen and Spot checks.

Combat: Ostriches usually kick their opponents till they stop moving, or flee if they seem too troublesome.

bhu

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #269 on: May 23, 2009, 12:00:39 PM »
Okapi
                      Large Animal
Hit Dice:             5d8+15 (37 hp)
Initiative:           +1
Speed:                40 ft. (8 squares)
Armor Class:          15 (-1 Size, +1 Dex, +5 Natural), touch 10, flat-footed 14
Base Attack/Grapple:  +5/+16
Attack:               Hoof +11 melee (1d8+7)
Full Attack:         2 Hooves +11 melee (1d8+7)
Space/Reach:          10 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks:      Overrun
Special Qualities:    Low Light Vision
Saves:                Fort +7, Ref +5, Will +2
Abilities:            Str 24, Dex 12, Con 16, Int 2, Wis 13, Cha 6
Skills:               Listen +5, Spot +5
Feats:               Endurance, Run, Improved Overrun (B)
Environment:          Warm Forest
Organization:         Solitary
Challenge Rating:     2
Treasure:             None
Alignment:            Always Neutral
Advancement:         
Level Adjustment:     ---

"Okay...seriously Abner what is this thing?"

Overrun (Ex): When successfully performing an Overrun you also do 1d8+7 damage to the opponent.

Skills: Okapi have a +6 Racial Bonus to Hide checks in Jungle settings.

Combat: Okapis are shy, and usually hit attackers a round or two with hooves before fleeing (sometimes fleeing through the attackers).


                      Dire Okapi
                      Huge Animal
Hit Dice:             12d8+72 (126 hp)
Initiative:           +0
Speed:                50 ft. (10 squares)
Armor Class:          18 (-2 Size, +10 Natural), touch 8, flat-footed 18
Base Attack/Grapple:  +9/+28
Attack:               Hoof +18 melee (2d6+11)
Full Attack:          2 Hooves +18 melee (2d6+11)
Space/Reach:          15 ft./10 ft.
Special Attacks:      Trample (2d8+16)
Special Qualities:    Low Light Vision
Saves:                Fort +14, Ref +8, Will +5
Abilities:            Str 32, Dex 10, Con 22, Int 2, Wis 13, Cha 8
Skills:               Listen +9, Spot +8
Feats:               Endurance, Improved Bull Rush, Improved Overrun, Power Attack, Run
Environment:          Warm Forest
Organization:         Solitary
Challenge Rating:     6
Treasure:             None
Alignment:            Always Neutral
Advancement:         
Level Adjustment:     ---

"Crap it has an uncle..."

Dire Okapi are shy forest dwellers who apparently like stomping on anything that spooks them.

Trample (Ex): DC 27 Reflex Save for half damage.

Skills: Okapi have a +6 Racial Bonus to Hide checks in Jungle settings.

Trample (Ex): DC 27 Reflex Save for half damage (Save DC is Strength based).

Combat: Dire Okapis are a little tougher mentally than their regular brethren, and willingly stand toe to toe with opponents, usually trying to trample them.

bhu

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #270 on: May 24, 2009, 10:35:33 AM »
Dire Rhea
                      Medium Animal
Hit Dice:             3d8+3 (16 hp)
Initiative:           +2
Speed:                40 ft. (8 squares)
Armor Class:          15 (+2 Dex, +3 Natural), touch 12, flat-footed 13
Base Attack/Grapple:  +2/+5
Attack:               Kick +5 melee (1d6+3)
Full Attack:          Kick +5 melee (1d6+3)
Space/Reach:          5 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks:      -
Special Qualities:    Low Light Vision
Saves:                Fort +4, Ref +5, Will +2
Abilities:            Str 16, Dex 15, Con 13, Int 2, Wis 12, Cha 6
Skills:               Listen +4, Spot +4
Feats:                Endurance, Run
Environment:          Warm Plains
Organization:         Solitary, Pair, or Flock (10-100)
Challenge Rating:     2
Treasure:             None
Alignment:            Always Neutral
Advancement:          4-6 HD (Medium)
Level Adjustment:     ---

"More birds? Dammit Abner I thought we wuz done with birds after the last fiasco."

"They said these birds wuz smaller."

"The last birds were almost elephant size dammit!"

"You hear a rumblin' sound like a herd of cattle or somethin'?"

Dire Rheas are smaller than Dire Ostriches, but no less dangerous.  Especially during the breeding season when they form flocks...

Combat: Rheas fight similar to Ostriches.  Kick and run.

bhu

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #271 on: May 28, 2009, 01:09:51 PM »
Dire Swan
                      Medium Animal
Hit Dice:             3d8+6 (19 hp)
Initiative:           +2
Speed:                30 ft. (6 squares), Swim 30 ft., Fly 80 ft. (Average)
Armor Class:          15 (+2 Dex, +3 Natural), touch 12, flat-footed 13
Base Attack/Grapple:  +2/+4
Attack:               Bite +4 melee (1d6+2)
Full Attack:          Bite +4 melee (1d6+2)
Space/Reach:          5 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks:      -
Special Qualities:    Low Light Vision, Hold Breath
Saves:                Fort +5, Ref +4, Will +2
Abilities:            Str 14, Dex 13, Con 14, Int 2, Wis 12, Cha 8
Skills:               Listen +4, Spot +4, Swim +10
Feats:                Alertness, Endurance
Environment:          Any Temperate
Organization:         Domesticated, Solitary, Pair, or Flock
Challenge Rating:     2
Treasure:             None
Alignment:            Always Neutral
Advancement:          4-6 HD (Medium)
Level Adjustment:     ---

"So what's this weeks assignment Abner?"

"S'nother bird"

"Oh Jesus Christ..."

Dire Swans are raised as living ornaments, and sometimes as guard animals.  They are surprisingly mean tempered after all, and make decent guard animals as they're quite loud when surprised or angered.

Hold Breath (Ex): Dire Swans may hold their breath for (4 times Constitution modifier) before it risks drowning.

Skills: Dire Swans have a +8 Racial Bonus to Swim Checks, and may always take 10 on a Swim check.

Combat: Swans tend to charge forward and start biting.  They're loud, and very much not subtle.


bhu

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #272 on: May 30, 2009, 10:10:42 AM »
Dire Ibis
                      Medium Animal
Hit Dice:             4d8+8 (26 hp)
Initiative:           +5
Speed:                30 ft. (6 squares), Fly 80 ft. (Average)
Armor Class:          14 (+1 Dex, +3 Natural), touch 11, flat-footed 13
Base Attack/Grapple:  +3/+5
Attack:               Bite +5 melee (1d6+2)
Full Attack:          Bite +5 melee (1d6+2)
Space/Reach:          5 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks:      -
Special Qualities:    Low Light Vision, Hold Breath
Saves:                Fort +6, Ref +5, Will +2
Abilities:            Str 14, Dex 13, Con 14, Int 2, Wis 12, Cha 8
Skills:               Listen +6, Spot +7, Swim +10
Feats:                Alertness, improved Initiative
Environment:          Warm Marsh or Forest
Organization:          Solitary, Pair, or Colony (5-30)
Challenge Rating:     2
Treasure:             None
Alignment:            Always Neutral
Advancement:          5-6 HD (Medium), 7-8 HD (Large)
Level Adjustment:     ---

"Swamps.  Ah hate swamps."

"Calm down Abner."

"Ain't nuthin' good comes out of swamps..."

"We've done worse..."

"Ah was sued fer sexshul harassment by thet Medusa last time we went into a swamp..."

Ibis are wading birds that are normally harmless to people, but Dire Ibis flocks can wipe out fish supplies if left unchecked.

Hold Breath (Ex): Dire Ibis may hold their breath for (4 times Constitution modifier) before it risks drowning.

Skills: Dire Ibis gain a +8 Racial Bonus to all Swim Checks.

Combat: Ibis normally peck at opponents, and retreat if they are troublesome.

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #273 on: May 31, 2009, 12:34:22 PM »
Dire Pelican
                      Large Animal
Hit Dice:             5d8+15 (28 hp)
Initiative:           +1
Speed:                30 ft. (6 squares), Swim 30 ft., Fly 90 ft. (Average)
Armor Class:          13 (-1 Size, +1 Dex, +3 Natural), touch 10, flat-footed 13
Base Attack/Grapple:  +3/+10
Attack:               Bite +5 melee (1d8+3)
Full Attack:          Bite +5 melee (1d8+3)
Space/Reach:          10 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks:      Snatch, Swallow Whole
Special Qualities:    Low Light Vision
Saves:                Fort +7, Ref +5, Will +2
Abilities:            Str 16, Dex 13, Con 16, Int 2, Wis 12, Cha 4
Skills:               Listen +5, Spot +5, Swim +11
Feats:                Flyby Attack, Hover
Environment:          Any Warm or Temperate
Organization:         Solitary or Creche (20-100)
Challenge Rating:     2
Treasure:             None
Alignment:            Always Neutral
Advancement:          6-10 HD (Large)
Level Adjustment:     ---


"Hold still Bert."

"It hzz ma hed in it's mouf."

"Ah got a fish.  Th' man down to tha pier said they lahk fish.   Heeeere birdie birdie birdie..."

Dire Pelicans are evil fish eating monsters.  Or at least that's what the fishermen say.  Of course fishermen tend to drink a lot...

Snatch (Ex): The Dire Pelican can use the Snatch Feat despite not qualifying for it on opponents up to 2 Size Classes Smaller than itself.

Swallow Whole (Ex): A Dire Pelican can Swallow Whole any opponent it has grabbed if it is up to two size classes smaller than itself.  The swallowed opponent takes 1d6+3 bludgeoning damage and 3 points of acid damage per round it is inside the Pelicans stomach.  The victim may cut it's way out with a light slashing or piercing weapon by doing 15 points of damage to it (AC 11).  Once the victim exits muscular action closes the hole, and other swallowed victims must cut their own way out.  The Dire Pelicans stomach can hold 1 Small, 4 Tiny, or 16 Diminutive or smaller opponents.

Skills: Dire Pelicans gain a +8 Racial Bonus on all Swim Checks.

Combat:  Dire Pelicans are pretty brave if their opponent is smaller than them.  And composed of some sort of fishlike substance.  But occasionally they go mean and attack bigger prey.
« Last Edit: June 05, 2009, 12:11:04 PM by bhu »

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #274 on: June 02, 2009, 11:25:24 AM »
Hairbeasts
                      Large Aberration
Hit Dice:             5d8+10 (32 hp)
Initiative:           +2
Speed:                40 ft. (8 squares)
Armor Class:          15 (-1 Size, +2 Dex, +4 Natural), touch 11, flat-footed 13
Base Attack/Grapple:  +3/+11
Attack:               Yorp! +7 melee touch (grapple)
Full Attack:          Yorp! +7 melee touch (grapple)
Space/Reach:          10 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks:      Yorp!
Special Qualities:    Blind, Blindsight 60', Damage Reduction 10/Slashing
Saves:                Fort +3, Ref +3, Will +6
Abilities:            Str 18, Dex 15, Con 15, Int 3, Wis 14, Cha 12
Skills:               Listen +10
Feats:                Endurance, Run
Environment:          Any
Organization:         Solitary, Pair, or Group (3-6)
Challenge Rating:     3
Treasure:             None
Alignment:            Always Neutral
Advancement:          6-10 HD (Large)
Level Adjustment:     ---

"Bert ah know we wanted somethin' differnt this time out...but this is just weird..."

"Relax Abner.  Ah brought mah cuzin Joe Bob along to get his feet wet helpin' out.  He's one'a them psychic types."

"FIRE!!"

"Beg pardon?'

"FIRE IS THE ANSWER TO ALL OF LIFES PROBLEMS!!"

"Abner...I'm not exactly reassured by his...enthusiasm..."

Hairbeasts (also known as Dire Hairs) are strange critters that seem to be composed entirely of hair.  What they eat, how they reproduce, and how they came to be is virtually unknown.  They are trainable as mounts, but their handlers don't seem very keen to give up their secrets as to how to train them, or what they might know of their origin.  Hairbeasts apparently understand commands in Common, but cannot speak.  They have been known to howl, bark, purr, or growl though.

Yorp! (Ex): If the Hairbeast makes a successful touch attack it is considered to be grappling it's opponent.  It's hairs work their way into it's opponents eyes and facial orifices during grapples, and each round the grapple is maintained the opponent must make a DC 14 Fortitude Save (Save DC is Constitution based) or be Blinded and Sickened for as long as the Grapple continues and for 1d3 rounds thereafter (he also cannot speak for the duration of the grapple and 1 round thereafter).  The Hairbeast does 1d4 damage with a successful grapple as well.  Hairbeasts may use their Yorp! attack as part of a charge.

Blind (Ex): Hairbeasts are blind, and are effectively immune to any attack or effect that requires them to be able to see.

Combat: Hairbeasts charge into the grapple, and begin wrasslin'.  Sometimes they get bored and take off, but generally you better escape the hold and run.
« Last Edit: June 02, 2009, 11:27:11 AM by bhu »

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #275 on: June 05, 2009, 12:16:52 PM »
 Dire Komodo Dragon
                      Large Animal
Hit Dice:             6d8+24 (51 hp)
Initiative:           +5
Speed:                30 ft. (6 squares)
Armor Class:          17 (-1 Size, +1 Dex, +7 Natural), touch 10, flat-footed 16
Base Attack/Grapple:  +4/+14
Attack:               Bite +9 melee (2d6+6 plus poison) or Tail Slap +9 melee (2d6+6 plus trip)
Full Attack:          Bite +9 melee (2d6+6 plus poison) or Tail Slap +9 melee (2d6+6 plus trip)
Space/Reach:          10 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks:      Poison, Tail Sweep
Special Qualities:    Enhanced Scent, Running Spurt, Low Metabolism
Saves:                Fort +9, Ref +6, Will +3
Abilities:            Str 23, Dex 12, Con 18, Int 1, Wis 12, Cha 2
Skills:               Hide +1, Listen +1, Move Silently +6, Spot +1
Feats:                Ability Focus (Poison), improved Initiative, Run
Environment:          Warm Forest
Organization:         Solitary, Pair, or Cluster (3-6)
Challenge Rating:    3
Treasure:             None
Alignment:            Always Neutral
Advancement:          7-12 HD (Large), 13-24 HD (Huge)
Level Adjustment:     ---
 
"LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRDSSSSSSSS!"

Dire Komodos are larger, meaner versions of their regular cousins.

Poison (Ex): Injury, DC 19 Fort Save, Initial Damage is 1d4 Strength and opponent continues to lose 1 hp per round until the victim takes 1 hp of magical healing or a DC 15 heal Check is made due to continual blood loss.  Secondary damage is 2d4 Strength.

Tail Sweep (Ex): If the Dire Komodo successfully hits with it's Tail Slap, it may immediately make a Trip Attempt as a Free Action without provoking an Attack of Opportunity.  If it fails it's opponent does not get a Trip attack in return.

Enhanced Scent (Ex): This works like the regular Scent ability, except that it can smell blood/carrion up to 2 miles away.

Running Spurt (Ex): The Komodo can increase it's base land speed by +30 feet for 1 round per point of Constitution modifier.  Once used it must rest for 1 hour before it can use the Running Spurt again.

Low Metabolism (Ex): Dire Komodos can go up to a month without food before needing to make Fortitude checks against starvation.

Combat: Komodos usually attack by ambush, and then let the prey run, confident it will bleed out, and that it's Improved Scent will let it track the animal to it's location of demise.  Stubborn foes are bitten relentlessly.

Prak, the Mad

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #276 on: June 06, 2009, 05:21:57 AM »
er, I think your dire komodo dragons area a bit small... given that Komodo dragons are, I think, large size...

edit: Wikipedia corroborates. 2-3 meters in length...
« Last Edit: June 06, 2009, 05:23:34 AM by Prak, the Mad »

bhu

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #277 on: June 06, 2009, 07:47:46 AM »
Lengthwise they are in the large range, but a lot of thats tail, and their weight doesn't even approach the bottom end of the large range.  So I went with medium.

bhu

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #278 on: June 07, 2009, 09:03:06 AM »
Giant Banana Slug
                      Small Vermin
Hit Dice:             2d8+2 (11 hp)
Initiative:           -2
Speed:                15 ft. (3 squares)
Armor Class:          11 (+1 Size, -2 Dex, +2 Natural), touch 9, flat-footed 11
Base Attack/Grapple:  +1/-3
Attack:               Wrap +1 melee touch (grapple)
Full Attack:          Wrap +1 melee touch (grapple)
Space/Reach:          5 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks:      Radula, Slime, Wrap
Special Qualities:    Dark Vision 60', Estivation, Weaknesses, Scent
Saves:                Fort +4, Ref -2, Will +1
Abilities:            Str 10, Dex 7, Con 12, Int -, Wis 12, Cha 2
Skills:               -
Feats:                -
Environment:         Warm or Temperate Forest or Mountains
Organization:         Solitary or Pair
Challenge Rating:     1
Treasure:             None
Alignment:            Always Neutral
Advancement:          3-4 HD (Medium)
Level Adjustment:     ---

"So let me get this straight.  We're climbin' 50 feet up thet tree, grabbin' slime critters hangin' from the thing, and wrasslin' them into a bag."

"Ayuh,"

"Screw that.  JOE BOB! Joe Bob, burn thet tree down.  We'll bag them critters when they fall off."

"FIRE!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!"

Yeeeaaah...yeah I'm gonna go on record again and say there's soemthin' wrong with thet boy..."

These larger versions of the bright yellow molluscs will scavenge and eat just about anything.  Usually little danger to adventurers, they're are most dangerous when they creep up on people in their sleep or drop on them from the tree they were setting in.  And they just skeeve people out really.

Wrap (Ex): If the Banana Slug successfully makes a touch attack it is considered to be grappling it's victim.

Slime (Ex):  Banana Slugs are covered in slime whose consistency they can alter to make sticky or slippery.  While sticky the Slug gains a +8 Racial Bonus to Climb and Grapple Checks.  While slippery it gains a +8 Racial Bonus to Escape Artist and a +2 Deflection Bonus to Armor Class.  Switching between the two states is a Swift Action.

Radula (Ex): When grappling a slug brings it's boring radula to bear, doing 1d6 damage per round.  If it's opponent rolls a natural one on the opposed Grapple Check it also does 1 point of temporary Constitution damage.

Estivation (Ex): During the dry seasons the Banana Slug can hibernate, entering a stat of suspended animation.  It takes a Full Round Action to enter or leave hibernation.  While the Slug is in estivation it does not require food or water for at least 5 months, and gains a +2 Racial Bonus on all Fortitude Saves against Starvation or Dehydration afterwards.

Weaknesses (Ex): Slugs are exceptionally vulnerable to dehydration.  They take a -4 Racial Penalty on any spell or effect that causes deydration or water loss.  Throwing a 1/2 pound vial of salt on them does 1d6 damage per round until they wash it off.

Combat: Slugs tend to grab hold and proceed to nibblin'.  Lets face it they're slugs, they aren't tactical geniuses. 


bhu

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Re: Uncle Kitties Guide to Hopefully Humorous Abominations of Nature
« Reply #279 on: June 07, 2009, 09:06:24 AM »
Kirby
                      Small Aberration
Hit Dice:             1d8 (4 hp)
Initiative:           +1
Speed:                20 ft. (4 squares), Climb 20 ft., Fly 20 ft. (Clumsy)
Armor Class:          12 (+1 Size, +1 Dex), touch 12, flat-footed 11
Base Attack/Grapple:  +0/-5
Attack:               By weapon +1 melee
Full Attack:          By weapon +1 melee
Space/Reach:          5 ft./5 ft.
Special Attacks:      Inhale, Copy Abilities, Spit, Air Blast
Special Qualities:    Dark Vision 60', Inflated Flight, Invisible Hands
Saves:                Fort +0, Ref +1, Will +2
Abilities:            Str 8, Dex 12, Con 10, Int 8, Wis 10, Cha 12
Skills:               Balance +2, Climb +7, Jump +7, Swim +7, Tumble +3
Feats:                Weapon Finesse
Environment:          Any
Organization:         Solitary
Challenge Rating:     1/2
Treasure:             Standard
Alignment:            Chaotic Good
Advancement:          by Character Class
Level Adjustment:     +2


Abner...whut the hell is this thing?  And why is it smiling?"

Kirby's are a strange race of round, pastel colored beings who are surprisingly good warriors despite their appearance.  Favored Class is Fighter, Ranger, Scout, Warblade, or Swordsage.

Inhale (Su): As a Full Round Action a Kirby can inhale (Swallow Whole) any creature it's own Size Class or smaller within 10'.  The opponent must make a DC 12 Reflex Save (Save DC is Constitution Based with a +2 Racial Bonus), or be swallowed whole.  No harm can be done to it while it is swallowed unless the Kirby is killed (and the Kirby then promptly spits it out), and it cannot harm the Kirby.  While a Kirby has swallowed a creature it cannot use it's Air Blast or Inflated Flight abilities.

Copy Abilities (Su): When a Kirby has swallowed a creature it may use any one Ex or Su ability the creature has, but the Saving Throw and Caster Level are based upon the Kirby's Hit Dice and stats, not the opponents.

Spit (Su): A Kirby may spit a swallowed opponent as a Standard Action.  Spat opponents are Ranged Attacks with no Range increment, and a Range of 10'.  Damage depends on Size: Small=1d6, Tiny= 1d3, Diminutive or Smaller=1 point. Spat opponents also take the same amount of damage.

Air Blast (Su): As a Standard Action a Kirby can inhale , and then exhale a powerful blast of air.  This is a ranged attack with a Range Increment of 10 feet that does 2d6 bludgeoning damage. 

Inflated Flight (Ex):  As a Standard Action a Kirby may inhale enough air to become buoyant.  He may then fly by flapping his arms.  He may not use his Inhale, Spit, or Air Blast powers while flying.

Invisible Hands (Ex): Despite having no visible hands or fingers this does not seem to hinder Kirby's in any way, and  they can perform as though they had them.

Skills: Kirby's have a +8 Racial Bonus to all Climb, Jump, and Swim Checks.  They may always take 10 on a Climb Check. Kirby's are proficient with all Simple and Martial weapons and with all Shields except Tower Shields.

Combat: Kirby's prefer to fight with weapons as normal, reserving their Inhale/Spit attacks for troublesome foes.  It's always good if your enemy underestimates you.
« Last Edit: June 09, 2009, 11:31:28 AM by bhu »