Author Topic: The worst thing to say during sex...  (Read 165650 times)

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Johannixx

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Re: The worst thing to say during sex...
« Reply #1000 on: February 25, 2009, 07:09:14 AM »
It would be really sexy if you would Baa for me....

Is that a Might & Magic reference? I'd be turned on if my partner said that to me.

It's a reference to sheep.  Sheep go baa.   :P

Yes, but it's a given that sheep are a turn-on.

Only if you're Scottish...

GawainBS

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Re: The worst thing to say during sex...
« Reply #1001 on: February 25, 2009, 12:00:33 PM »
It would be really sexy if you would Baa for me....

Is that a Might & Magic reference? I'd be turned on if my partner said that to me.

It's a reference to sheep.  Sheep go baa.   :P

That would raise the chance of the person being a redhead (which is a Good Thing) with about 10%.

Yes, but it's a given that sheep are a turn-on.

Only if you're Scottish...

Which raises the chances that the person is a redhead by about 10%, which is a Good Thing.
« Last Edit: March 03, 2009, 08:43:20 AM by GawainBS »

emissary666

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Re: The worst thing to say during sex...
« Reply #1002 on: March 02, 2009, 06:50:11 PM »
(insert barnyard animal sound here)
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Re: The worst thing to say during sex...
« Reply #1003 on: March 20, 2009, 12:39:54 AM »

While we're at a restaurant:

Me: Where am I?
AC: Canada.
Me: REALLY? That means there are moosen here!
AC: There are moosen in mah pants.
Me: orly?
AC: Yeah, if you check my boxers, you'll find moose tracks.
Me:  :puke

I've forgotten the other messed up shit we said to each other today. We really should start recording our conversations. Such terrible-ness... lost... forever...
 

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ranlam

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Re: The worst thing to say during sex...
« Reply #1004 on: March 20, 2009, 04:20:56 AM »
"Oh yeah, oh yeah...Rob..Robert..Jere...Jam...John."

Said without alcohol involved and months and months
of datin'/sexin' under our belts.

Finally got the name right, but, come on, four tries? :bigeye

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ranlam
 

Vidar

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Re: The worst thing to say during sex...
« Reply #1005 on: March 20, 2009, 09:41:22 AM »

While we're at a restaurant:

Me: Where am I?
AC: Canada.
Me: REALLY? That means there are moosen here!
AC: There are moosen in mah pants.
Me: orly?
AC: Yeah, if you check my boxers, you'll find moose tracks.
Me:  :puke

I've forgotten the other messed up shit we said to each other today. We really should start recording our conversations. Such terrible-ness... lost... forever...
 

Isn't it supposed to be "during sex"? Or do you both fancy getting it done in restaurants?

Nanshork

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Re: The worst thing to say during sex...
« Reply #1006 on: March 20, 2009, 12:20:39 PM »
"Oh yeah, oh yeah...Rob..Robert..Jere...Jam...John."

Said without alcohol involved and months and months
of datin'/sexin' under our belts.

Finally got the name right, but, come on, four tries? :bigeye

Cheers,
ranlam
 

Wow, I've had some name mess ups but never that bad and I don't think ever during the act.
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AfterCrescent

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Re: The worst thing to say during sex...
« Reply #1007 on: March 20, 2009, 02:30:00 PM »
Or do you both fancy getting it done in restaurants?
Who doesn't?
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Vidar

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Re: The worst thing to say during sex...
« Reply #1008 on: March 20, 2009, 03:00:31 PM »
Or do you both fancy getting it done in restaurants?
Who doesn't?

I just can't stand all those people watching, have they no manners at all?

Kuroimaken

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Re: The worst thing to say during sex...
« Reply #1009 on: March 20, 2009, 03:04:29 PM »
Or do you both fancy getting it done in restaurants?
Who doesn't?

I just can't stand all those people watching, have they no manners at all?

Hey, as long as they don't ask to join...

What? I'm possessive.
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Vidar

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Re: The worst thing to say during sex...
« Reply #1010 on: March 20, 2009, 03:05:15 PM »
Or do you both fancy getting it done in restaurants?
Who doesn't?

I just can't stand all those people watching, have they no manners at all?

Hey, as long as they don't ask to join...

What? I'm possessive.

It would be a great way to tip your waiter, though.

CountArioch

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Re: The worst thing to say during sex...
« Reply #1011 on: March 20, 2009, 03:36:47 PM »
I think I've thought of the worst thing to say ever.

"I just shit through my herpes and leprosy infected anus onto the bed.  Also, I'm gay."
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Re: The worst thing to say during sex...
« Reply #1012 on: March 20, 2009, 03:38:52 PM »
No where near the worst. Leprosy infected anus? That's comedy gold. I don't think, even if it was actually happening, that someone could resist laughing at that.
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Vidar

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Re: The worst thing to say during sex...
« Reply #1013 on: March 20, 2009, 10:53:37 PM »
No where near the worst. Leprosy infected anus? That's comedy gold. I don't think, even if it was actually happening, that someone could resist laughing at that.

Comedy gold? Can you see yourself raking in the money as a stand up comedian exploiting leprosy infected anuses...anus...anusen...ani...butts?

Bozwevial

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Re: The worst thing to say during sex...
« Reply #1014 on: March 20, 2009, 11:01:46 PM »
No where near the worst. Leprosy infected anus? That's comedy gold. I don't think, even if it was actually happening, that someone could resist laughing at that.

Comedy gold? Can you see yourself raking in the money as a stand up comedian exploiting leprosy infected anuses...anus...anusen...ani...butts?

You can't tell me you wouldn't laugh at that phrase.

Vidar

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Re: The worst thing to say during sex...
« Reply #1015 on: March 20, 2009, 11:10:08 PM »
How about: "I should remind you I can only come when you sing some Elvis classics. For the best effect you should sing as low as possible."

And if she agrees, close your eyes at the climax and whisper in her ear: "You're still the King, I love you."

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Re: The worst thing to say during sex...
« Reply #1016 on: March 25, 2009, 03:55:03 AM »
While fingering, use sign language to say "Help me fuck you". If she understands it, start writing more. If she responds in sign language in a similar hole, well...


[spoiler][/spoiler]

CountArioch

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Re: The worst thing to say during sex...
« Reply #1017 on: March 25, 2009, 04:26:08 AM »
No where near the worst. Leprosy infected anus? That's comedy gold. I don't think, even if it was actually happening, that someone could resist laughing at that.

Comedy gold? Can you see yourself raking in the money as a stand up comedian exploiting leprosy infected anuses...anus...anusen...ani...butts?

You can't tell me you wouldn't laugh at that phrase.

It's no laughing matter.  You catch it in your mouth, and then it travels through the digestive tract and settles in the anus.  You will literally wipe and wipe until your anus is a raw, bloody stump, and not even realize.  Then next thing you know, you're weightlifting and you crap out your own intestines.
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Irthos Levethix

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Re: The worst thing to say during sex...
« Reply #1018 on: March 25, 2009, 04:38:49 AM »
While fingering, use sign language to say "Help me fuck you". If she understands it, start writing more. If she responds in sign language in a similar hole, well...

Nice.
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veekie

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Re: The worst thing to say during sex...
« Reply #1019 on: March 25, 2009, 06:56:06 AM »
While fingering, use sign language to say "Help me fuck you". If she understands it, start writing more. If she responds in sign language in a similar hole, well...

Nice.
We have a winner here.

Think Morse or Braille might work too?
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