Author Topic: Brothel Optimization!  (Read 14982 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Gavinfoxx

  • King Kong
  • ****
  • Posts: 822
  • *Forkbark* Wauwau!
    • Email
Re: Brothel Optimization!
« Reply #40 on: June 19, 2011, 11:53:32 PM »
If the druid character is an adult, does it really matter if s/he wildshapes into less-than-adult forms? It's consent that matters, after all.

...Just sayin'.

Wouldn't, uh, mechanics be an issue at this point?

*Checks http://classic-web.archive.org/web/20080416115424rn_1/forums.gleemax.com/wotc_archive/index.php/t-404381 *

Lessee. Medium Young Adult: At L16, she has access to steel and shadow, and at L17, Song.
Going down to the medium Juveniles:
there's White at L12
Black, Brass, Shadow, Ethereal, Steel, Pan Lung at L13
Copper, Song, Li Lung, Battle, Sapphire at L14
and there's Deep at L15.

But really... do we REALLY want to go below Juvenile? REALLY? Even with Enlarge Person? EVEN with the person doing the shaping being an adult?
BG's other resident furry!

Lycanthromancer

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 4003
    • Email
Re: Brothel Optimization!
« Reply #41 on: June 20, 2011, 02:18:33 PM »
Enlarge the bottom, Reduce the top?

ANYWAY...

The Grease spell would come in really handy, wouldn't it?
[spoiler]Masculine men like masculine things. Masculine men are masculine. Therefore, liking masculine men is masculine.

I dare anyone to find a hole in that logic.
______________________________________
[/spoiler]I'm a writer. These are my stories. Some are even SFW! (Warning: Mostly Gay.)
My awesome poster collection. (Warning, some are NSFW.)
Agita's awesome poster collection.
[spoiler]
+1 Lycanthromancer
Which book is Lycanthromancer in?
Lyca ... is in the book. Yes he is.
 :D
shit.. concerning psionics optimization, lycan IS the book
[/spoiler]

Chilastra022

  • Ring-Tailed Lemur
  • **
  • Posts: 74
Re: Brothel Optimization!
« Reply #42 on: June 20, 2011, 03:20:48 PM »
A bed with rubber sheets and a resetting grease trap? xD

Lycanthromancer

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 4003
    • Email
Re: Brothel Optimization!
« Reply #43 on: June 20, 2011, 03:32:26 PM »
I hear psychoactive skins are pretty hax in the club scene these days.

Masterwork clubs, even.
[spoiler]Masculine men like masculine things. Masculine men are masculine. Therefore, liking masculine men is masculine.

I dare anyone to find a hole in that logic.
______________________________________
[/spoiler]I'm a writer. These are my stories. Some are even SFW! (Warning: Mostly Gay.)
My awesome poster collection. (Warning, some are NSFW.)
Agita's awesome poster collection.
[spoiler]
+1 Lycanthromancer
Which book is Lycanthromancer in?
Lyca ... is in the book. Yes he is.
 :D
shit.. concerning psionics optimization, lycan IS the book
[/spoiler]

veekie

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 9034
  • WARNING: Homing Miko
Re: Brothel Optimization!
« Reply #44 on: June 20, 2011, 05:30:11 PM »
Enlarge the bottom, Reduce the top?

ANYWAY...

The Grease spell would come in really handy, wouldn't it?
Depends on the client, but theres always regeneration....then you add those nipple clamps for those who aren't already masochists.
The mind transcends the body.
It's also a little cold because of that.
Please get it a blanket.

I wish I could read your mind,
I can barely read mine.

"Skynet begins to learn at a geometric rate. It becomes self-aware at 2:14 a.m. Eastern time, August 29th. At 2:15, it begins rolling up characters."

[spoiler]
"Just what do you think the moon up in the sky is? Everyone sees that big, round shiny thing and thinks there must be something round up there, right? That's just silly. The truth is much more awesome than that. You can almost never see the real Moon, and its appearance is death to humans. You can only see the Moon when it's reflected in things. And the things it reflects in, like water or glass, can all be broken, right? Since the moon you see in the sky is just being reflected in the heavens, if you tear open the heavens it's easy to break it~"
-Ibuki Suika, on overkill

To sumbolaion diakoneto moi, basilisk ouranionon.
Epigenentheto, apoleia keraune hos timeis pteirei.
Hekatonkatis kai khiliakis astrapsato.
Khiliarkhou Astrape!
[/spoiler]

There is no higher price than 'free'.

"I won't die. I've been ordered not to die."

braininthejar

  • Barbary Macaque at the Rock of Gibraltar
  • ***
  • Posts: 152
Re: Brothel Optimization!
« Reply #45 on: June 20, 2011, 06:07:50 PM »
Quote
Remember to put an Alter Self/Disguise Self trap in that room so you can have the customer get anything he likes.

Alternatively, hire some dopplegangers

If open licence books are allowed, Book of Erotic Fantasy should contain some useful tips.

Gavinfoxx

  • King Kong
  • ****
  • Posts: 822
  • *Forkbark* Wauwau!
    • Email
Re: Brothel Optimization!
« Reply #46 on: June 20, 2011, 06:15:06 PM »
Quote
Remember to put an Alter Self/Disguise Self trap in that room so you can have the customer get anything he likes.

Alternatively, hire some dopplegangers

If open licence books are allowed, Book of Erotic Fantasy should contain some useful tips.

Phasm > Doppleganger > Changeling

Also, there WERE a few competitors to the BoEF out there... anyone remember what they are? Nymphology, and there was at least one other?
BG's other resident furry!

ImperatorK

  • Bi-Curious George
  • ****
  • Posts: 500
Re: Brothel Optimization!
« Reply #47 on: June 20, 2011, 06:44:06 PM »
I knoooow! i wish i could use BoEF, it'd be perfect for this sorta thing, but the GM is pretty adamant about no third-party material xD
"I'm done thinking for today! It's caused me enough trouble!"
"Take less damage to avoid being killed."
"In the arena of logic, I fight unarmed."


[spoiler]
Quote from: Lateral
Or you could just be a cleric of an ideal. Like, physics and say that the domain choices reflect potential and kinetic energy.

 Plus, where other clerics say "For Pelor," "For Nerull," or "For Crom?" You get to say, "FOR SCIENCE!" *fanfare*

About me:
Quote from: dark_samuari
I know your game, you just want a magical Amazon.com to knock off those good ol' honest magic shops run by polite, old wizards!
Use Iron Heart Surge on the sun. That'll teach him to use fluff as RAW.

Damn you! You totally ruined my build that was all about getting epic far shot early and throwing my enemies into the sun!
[/spoiler]

Gavinfoxx

  • King Kong
  • ****
  • Posts: 822
  • *Forkbark* Wauwau!
    • Email
Re: Brothel Optimization!
« Reply #48 on: June 21, 2011, 01:36:10 AM »
Well, I am still curious about what the third one was, hah...
BG's other resident furry!

ImperatorK

  • Bi-Curious George
  • ****
  • Posts: 500
Re: Brothel Optimization!
« Reply #49 on: June 21, 2011, 03:35:13 AM »
Book of Carnal Knowledge, or something like that.
"I'm done thinking for today! It's caused me enough trouble!"
"Take less damage to avoid being killed."
"In the arena of logic, I fight unarmed."


[spoiler]
Quote from: Lateral
Or you could just be a cleric of an ideal. Like, physics and say that the domain choices reflect potential and kinetic energy.

 Plus, where other clerics say "For Pelor," "For Nerull," or "For Crom?" You get to say, "FOR SCIENCE!" *fanfare*

About me:
Quote from: dark_samuari
I know your game, you just want a magical Amazon.com to knock off those good ol' honest magic shops run by polite, old wizards!
Use Iron Heart Surge on the sun. That'll teach him to use fluff as RAW.

Damn you! You totally ruined my build that was all about getting epic far shot early and throwing my enemies into the sun!
[/spoiler]

Hasmadad

  • Ring-Tailed Lemur
  • **
  • Posts: 86
Re: Brothel Optimization!
« Reply #50 on: June 21, 2011, 05:14:57 AM »

ImperatorK

  • Bi-Curious George
  • ****
  • Posts: 500
Re: Brothel Optimization!
« Reply #51 on: June 21, 2011, 05:20:10 AM »
"THE COMPLETE GUIDE TO UNLAWFUL CARNAL KNOWLEDGE"
I had it right, partially.
"I'm done thinking for today! It's caused me enough trouble!"
"Take less damage to avoid being killed."
"In the arena of logic, I fight unarmed."


[spoiler]
Quote from: Lateral
Or you could just be a cleric of an ideal. Like, physics and say that the domain choices reflect potential and kinetic energy.

 Plus, where other clerics say "For Pelor," "For Nerull," or "For Crom?" You get to say, "FOR SCIENCE!" *fanfare*

About me:
Quote from: dark_samuari
I know your game, you just want a magical Amazon.com to knock off those good ol' honest magic shops run by polite, old wizards!
Use Iron Heart Surge on the sun. That'll teach him to use fluff as RAW.

Damn you! You totally ruined my build that was all about getting epic far shot early and throwing my enemies into the sun!
[/spoiler]

Surreal

  • Hong Kong
  • ****
  • Posts: 1430
    • Email
Re: Brothel Optimization!
« Reply #52 on: June 21, 2011, 06:08:29 PM »
Don't forget Animate Object and a Gelatinous Cube!

... What? don't look at me like that, you knew this was inevitable.
---
"The late, sedate, and no to great." ~Surreal

Some Handy Links for CO Work (WotC 339 version) - a compilation of links for base/prestige class handbooks, tactics, spellcasting, character builds, D&D databases, etc.
Archived version of the above with working links

The Mango Index - a giant index for all things D&D and where to find them
The Mango List Reborn! - rehosted by KellKheraptis

Lists of Stuff - listing of class features etc and how to get them, etc. sort of like above but a little more specific and sorted by category
Polymorph, Wildshape and Shapechange, oh my! (comparison charts) - side-by-side comparison of all the various form altering abilities
Alternative Class Features
alternative ways to get class skills

Hasmadad

  • Ring-Tailed Lemur
  • **
  • Posts: 86
Re: Brothel Optimization!
« Reply #53 on: June 21, 2011, 06:37:05 PM »
"THE COMPLETE GUIDE TO UNLAWFUL CARNAL KNOWLEDGE"
I had it right, partially.

Have a cookie. =)

What I find more disturbing is that the items described in "Protection of the worst kind" are in wide use in some parts of the world.

-Uncle Has

Gavinfoxx

  • King Kong
  • ****
  • Posts: 822
  • *Forkbark* Wauwau!
    • Email
Re: Brothel Optimization!
« Reply #54 on: June 21, 2011, 06:38:50 PM »
I forgot the most important thing!

Bestow Curse

For infertility!  Offer it to all your 'working floor' employees!
BG's other resident furry!

Chilastra022

  • Ring-Tailed Lemur
  • **
  • Posts: 74
Re: Brothel Optimization!
« Reply #55 on: June 22, 2011, 12:28:40 AM »
Don't forget Animate Object and a Gelatinous Cube!

... What? don't look at me like that, you knew this was inevitable.

lvl 1 Urban druids with vaguely phallic shaped animated object companions? xD

not sure how to get my hands on a gelatinous cube though other than shapechange or polymorph any object (which i might be able to afford after the brothel's been running for a while)

I forgot the most important thing!

Bestow Curse

For infertility!  Offer it to all your 'working floor' employees!

Ohh great idea! Totally didn't realize i could use bestow curse like that.

Managed to flesh out the first lvl6 thrall ill acquire once my leadership is high enough. She'll probably be more popular than the brothel ironically. I haven't gotten her any gear aside from a mw string instrument (for the +2 bonus to perform (string instruments)), so with some buffs to charisma her skills could be quite a bit higher.

Name: Lady Gaga
Race: Pseudonatural Human
Gender: Hermaphrodite
Class: Bard 2(4), Human Paragon 3, Marshal 1
ECL: 6
Skills: Bluff +25, Diplomacy +28, Gather Information +28, Perform (Sing) +34, Perform(Oratory) +31, Perform (Comedy)+29, Perform (String Instruments) +29

« Last Edit: June 22, 2011, 12:33:09 AM by Chilastra022 »

Hasmadad

  • Ring-Tailed Lemur
  • **
  • Posts: 86
Re: Brothel Optimization!
« Reply #56 on: June 22, 2011, 05:06:33 AM »
Name: Lady Gaga
Race: Pseudonatural Human
Gender: Hermaphrodite
Class: Bard 2(4), Human Paragon 3, Marshal 1
ECL: 6
Skills: Bluff +25, Diplomacy +28, Gather Information +28, Perform (Sing) +34, Perform(Oratory) +31, Perform (Comedy)+29, Perform (String Instruments) +29


« Last Edit: June 22, 2011, 05:09:16 AM by Hasmadad »

Gavinfoxx

  • King Kong
  • ****
  • Posts: 822
  • *Forkbark* Wauwau!
    • Email
Re: Brothel Optimization!
« Reply #57 on: June 22, 2011, 07:35:39 AM »
So what does your DM think of all of these ideas??
BG's other resident furry!

Chilastra022

  • Ring-Tailed Lemur
  • **
  • Posts: 74
Re: Brothel Optimization!
« Reply #58 on: June 22, 2011, 03:23:01 PM »
Hes surprisingly supportive of most of them :) he loves your guys' creativity, and quite a few ideas got him to chuckle. He was wanting to use the business rules in DMG II for determining the overall profits of the business. But i thought they were pretty horrible, so we're settling on doing a random 1d20 starting out, to determine the number of customers i have that day. Then from there roll a perform (Courtesan) check for each customer based on the average courtesan's performance skill. The result would be the daily profit, and since the profit would range anywhere from 1 gold to 18 gold easily simulates if the customer was a wealthy individual or of a more humble background. 

Thankfully with the magical traps providing food (or even remove the need to eat/drink/sleep) should cut down on the costs to maintain the business quite a bit, but either way ill be keeping a spreadsheet with records of each day's profits and expenses, including any special events or natural disasters. Eventually as i expand the establishment (in both size/number of rooms, and features - IE magical traps, special courtesans etc) i'll get to roll additional d20's, or add modifiers to the rolls based on appealing features i add to the establishment, as well as any special events happening in the city the business is based in. All in all though this is going to be extremely fun, and its all thanks to you guys! :D

So far, the lvl 1 courtesans will have about a +20 to their performance skill (with lady gaga's motivate charisma), so on average they should make about 1d6 gold to 3d6 gold per customer (and 3d10 silver if a courtesan sucks for whatever reason that day (the bad kind, mind you)). Some of the more unique courtesans make a bit less due to monster HD or LA or not having perform as a class skill, which i'm alright with since they'd be catering to a small niche in customer preferences anyway, so it'd make sense they'd make a bit less. The unique courtesans are primarily there to cater to a larger selection of customers (thus attracting more to the establishment in the form of a modifier on the d20's id roll).

Lycanthromancer

  • Organ Grinder
  • *****
  • Posts: 4003
    • Email
Re: Brothel Optimization!
« Reply #59 on: June 22, 2011, 04:20:40 PM »
I think exotic courtesans should require a 100% or more raise in what they expect, since you can't find, say, a willing beholder to screw just anywhere.
[spoiler]Masculine men like masculine things. Masculine men are masculine. Therefore, liking masculine men is masculine.

I dare anyone to find a hole in that logic.
______________________________________
[/spoiler]I'm a writer. These are my stories. Some are even SFW! (Warning: Mostly Gay.)
My awesome poster collection. (Warning, some are NSFW.)
Agita's awesome poster collection.
[spoiler]
+1 Lycanthromancer
Which book is Lycanthromancer in?
Lyca ... is in the book. Yes he is.
 :D
shit.. concerning psionics optimization, lycan IS the book
[/spoiler]