Author Topic: Recruiting for Church of The Commonwealth  (Read 1690 times)

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yellowdingo

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Recruiting for Church of The Commonwealth
« on: July 15, 2008, 12:04:03 AM »
Welcome to the Church of The Commonwealth.

Religious Doctrine:

1. String Theory invalidates Religion and Evolution.
2. The Universe is Debris of Change in Possibility.
3. A black hole is an event of change in Possibility affecting outward from source (back and forward through time simultaneously) and a singularity a point of change in Possibility.
5. Time continuous change in possibility.
6. Only life is capable of manipulating possibility and creating change in Possibility and did so from outside the limits of possibility.

Obligations of Church Members:

Church members have a number of obligations.

Ecclesiastical

You must wear a black shirt with a white negative handprint spraypainted onto the cloth (this is achieved by placing hand on cloth with fingers spread and spraying over it with white paint.
To get any schisms out of the way, members are obliged to choose one of two factions. Left Hand or Right Hand. Do try to stick to it. Left Hand Faction cannot associate with right hand Faction inside Church of Commonwealth facilities or at Gaming Conventions.

Political

You have one political Policy - "Every act of Government, Law, Constitution must have the direct and regular approval of every citizen."
You must run for Mayor with this Political policy in your home town.

Membership Fees:

There are no fees.

Something from yellowdingo:

Enjoy life. You have the right to an equal share.

Ubernoob

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Re: Recruiting for Church of The Commonwealth
« Reply #1 on: July 15, 2008, 12:28:37 AM »
Scientology was a funnier joke.
Ubernoob is a happy panda.

Prime32

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Re: Recruiting for Church of The Commonwealth
« Reply #2 on: July 15, 2008, 12:32:19 AM »
Scientology was a funnier joke.
Don't say that. They're listening :o
My work
The tier system in a nutshell:
[spoiler]Tier 6: A cartographer.
Tier 5: An expert cartographer or a decent marksman.
Tier 4: An expert marksman.
Tier 3: An expert marksman, cartographer and chef who can tie strong knots and is trained in hostage negotiation or a marksman so good he can shoot down every bullet fired by a minigun while armed with a rusted single-shot pistol that veers to the left.
Tier 2: Someone with teleportation, mind control, time manipulation, intangibility, the ability to turn into an exact duplicate of anything, or the ability to see into the future with perfect accuracy.
Tier 1: Someone with teleportation, mind control, time manipulation, intangibility, the ability to turn into an exact duplicate of anything and the ability to see into the future with perfect accuracy.[/spoiler]

yellowdingo

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Re: Recruiting for Church of The Commonwealth
« Reply #3 on: July 16, 2008, 12:12:22 PM »
I want to welcome you both to seek membership in the church of the Commonwealth. No pressure. As long as you can follow the obligations of membership and pursue greater involvement in your community you should find it enjoyable.

Prime32

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Re: Recruiting for Church of The Commonwealth
« Reply #4 on: July 16, 2008, 01:11:15 PM »
I'm going to have to pass... unless you change your doctrine to match mine, and name the church after me.
My work
The tier system in a nutshell:
[spoiler]Tier 6: A cartographer.
Tier 5: An expert cartographer or a decent marksman.
Tier 4: An expert marksman.
Tier 3: An expert marksman, cartographer and chef who can tie strong knots and is trained in hostage negotiation or a marksman so good he can shoot down every bullet fired by a minigun while armed with a rusted single-shot pistol that veers to the left.
Tier 2: Someone with teleportation, mind control, time manipulation, intangibility, the ability to turn into an exact duplicate of anything, or the ability to see into the future with perfect accuracy.
Tier 1: Someone with teleportation, mind control, time manipulation, intangibility, the ability to turn into an exact duplicate of anything and the ability to see into the future with perfect accuracy.[/spoiler]

PhaedrusXY

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Re: Recruiting for Church of The Commonwealth
« Reply #5 on: July 16, 2008, 06:21:21 PM »
You shouldn't have stopped taking your meds. Now put down the chair.
[spoiler]
A couple of water benders, a dike, a flaming arrow, and a few barrels of blasting jelly?

Sounds like the makings of a gay porn film.
...thanks
[/spoiler]

lotofsnow

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Re: Recruiting for Church of The Commonwealth
« Reply #6 on: July 17, 2008, 04:37:30 AM »
So, if I join your "church," you'll completely fund my campaign for mayor?

yellowdingo

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Re: Recruiting for Church of The Commonwealth
« Reply #7 on: July 17, 2008, 05:59:10 AM »
So, if I join your "church," you'll completely fund my campaign for mayor?

WHy should the finance anything...the basic enrole to run and a hundred bucks of Photos with vote 1: lotsofsnow for Mayor on the bottom can be done at the Kodak Automat using a Memory stick. If anything it is all down to you to walk door to door to promote yourself. Talk about your (rather singular and unpopular with Tyrants who profit from inequality) policies.

What did that cost you? It cost me $200, and my Rivals $20,000 and we both still lost.