Author Topic: Campaign Thread IV: Losing Your Virginity is Easier in the Woods  (Read 131380 times)

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Flay Crimsonwind

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Re: Campaign Thread IV: Losing Your Virginity is Easier in the Woods
« Reply #720 on: September 03, 2011, 06:02:08 AM »
[spoiler]As soon as he notices him, Zach starts to approach, making his presence known, as opposed to coming up on people sneakily. He'll also maintain some distance and wait until he's acknowledged to close in and speak, not wanting to appear rude.[/spoiler]

VennDygrem

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Re: Campaign Thread IV: Losing Your Virginity is Easier in the Woods
« Reply #721 on: September 03, 2011, 10:51:48 AM »
Alcy looks concerned, but not due to all the strange goings-on around her.

'Citizenship? I don't even want to be here! And why did I even pipe up to offer myself for a role in a guild? I've got to get back to Arborea...' she thinks to herself.

Monotremeancer

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Re: Campaign Thread IV: Losing Your Virginity is Easier in the Woods
« Reply #722 on: September 03, 2011, 11:57:41 AM »
Bill looks at the unconscious ogre, folds his arms and tilts his head slightly I must admit, I did not see that coming.
Who cares for realism when you can be awesome?

Sir Shadow

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Re: Campaign Thread IV: Losing Your Virginity is Easier in the Woods
« Reply #723 on: September 03, 2011, 12:32:03 PM »
Sir Shadow
[spoiler]"I gotta warn you, if you have any of the same ideas as the other Mages I have a Wand of Forced Bodily Intrusion.  Now then, what would you consider your magical specialty?" [/spoiler]
[spoiler]Bartholomeow is not really interested in a Wand of Forced Bodily Intrusion unless they are standard issue for the mage's guild. "Well, when I was in the academy, my major was Necromancy with a minor in Conjuration."[/spoiler]
[spoiler]"Necromancy is something we can use.  Got too many zombielike critters runnin' about because the the Mages Guild.  Someone needs ta study 'em.  You a necromancer from a religious point of view or is it more secular study.?"[/spoiler]
[spoiler]"My interest in necromancy is mostly academic; I'm no religious nut."[/spoiler]

Radmelon

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Re: Campaign Thread IV: Losing Your Virginity is Easier in the Woods
« Reply #724 on: September 03, 2011, 02:26:19 PM »
Noting a lul in the action Teo starts to meditate, repeating a mantra.
"Rutabega...Rutabega...Rutabega...Rutabega..."

bhu

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Re: Campaign Thread IV: Losing Your Virginity is Easier in the Woods
« Reply #725 on: September 03, 2011, 07:02:39 PM »
[spoiler]As soon as he notices him, Zach starts to approach, making his presence known, as opposed to coming up on people sneakily. He'll also maintain some distance and wait until he's acknowledged to close in and speak, not wanting to appear rude.[/spoiler]

Listen roll

Flay Crimsonwind

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Re: Campaign Thread IV: Losing Your Virginity is Easier in the Woods
« Reply #726 on: September 03, 2011, 07:05:09 PM »
[spoiler]As soon as he notices him, Zach starts to approach, making his presence known, as opposed to coming up on people sneakily. He'll also maintain some distance and wait until he's acknowledged to close in and speak, not wanting to appear rude.[/spoiler]

Listen roll
[spoiler]Listen: 14[/spoiler]

bhu

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Re: Campaign Thread IV: Losing Your Virginity is Easier in the Woods
« Reply #727 on: September 03, 2011, 07:06:55 PM »
Noting a lul in the action Teo starts to meditate, repeating a mantra.
"Rutabega...Rutabega...Rutabega...Rutabega..."

The unconscious Ogre sits bolt upright pointing at  you

"RUTABAGA....I MEAN JOSEPH!  MUST FIND JOSEPH FOR THE MASTER SCOOBIES!"


You feel his breath could kill a pigeon at 50 paces.  His shouting produces enough wind to muss your hair if you had any.

bhu

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Re: Campaign Thread IV: Losing Your Virginity is Easier in the Woods
« Reply #728 on: September 03, 2011, 07:11:23 PM »
[spoiler]As soon as he notices him, Zach starts to approach, making his presence known, as opposed to coming up on people sneakily. He'll also maintain some distance and wait until he's acknowledged to close in and speak, not wanting to appear rude.[/spoiler]

Listen roll
[spoiler]Listen: 14[/spoiler]

[spoiler]You can hear Bartholomew momentarily talking about Necromancy before the bellowing Ogre interrupts things.[/spoiler]
« Last Edit: September 03, 2011, 09:27:10 PM by bhu »

bhu

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Re: Campaign Thread IV: Losing Your Virginity is Easier in the Woods
« Reply #729 on: September 03, 2011, 07:16:25 PM »
Sir Shadow
[spoiler]"I gotta warn you, if you have any of the same ideas as the other Mages I have a Wand of Forced Bodily Intrusion.  Now then, what would you consider your magical specialty?" [/spoiler]
[spoiler]Bartholomeow is not really interested in a Wand of Forced Bodily Intrusion unless they are standard issue for the mage's guild. "Well, when I was in the academy, my major was Necromancy with a minor in Conjuration."[/spoiler]
[spoiler]"Necromancy is something we can use.  Got too many zombielike critters runnin' about because the the Mages Guild.  Someone needs ta study 'em.  You a necromancer from a religious point of view or is it more secular study.?"[/spoiler]
[spoiler]"My interest in necromancy is mostly academic; I'm no religious nut."[/spoiler]

[spoiler]You hear the ogre bellowing in the background.

"Well thank the Gawds for that we have enough of those running around now as it is.  Please fill out this application and leave us an address where we can contact you.  We start hiring soon."[/spoiler]

jojolagger

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Re: Campaign Thread IV: Losing Your Virginity is Easier in the Woods
« Reply #730 on: September 04, 2011, 12:29:04 AM »
The unconscious Ogre sits bolt upright pointing at  you

"RUTABAGA....I MEAN JOSEPH!  MUST FIND JOSEPH FOR THE MASTER SCOOBIES!"


You feel his breath could kill a pigeon at 50 paces.  His shouting produces enough wind to muss your hair if you had any.
Why are you looking for joseph? Calm down, I don't want to have to use force.
Countdown to Zombie Apocalypse 97
When you see this, copy it into your sig and -1
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Quotes [spoiler]
In other words, he thinks there's a "correct" way to play D&D.  *sigh*
There is: Kill shit and loot the corpse!
When you use a tool the way it was designed for -- its intended function -- then it will work very well for you.

But it's not the tool's fault if you use it for something else and you fail utterly, such as trying to eat cereal with a butterknife, pounding nails with a screwdriver, blogging to voice your political opinions, and brushing your teeth with a hammer.
[/spoiler]

VennDygrem

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Re: Campaign Thread IV: Losing Your Virginity is Easier in the Woods
« Reply #731 on: September 04, 2011, 12:53:54 AM »
"Force... Hmm, I once visited a plane where anything anyone would talk about was force-this, force-that. It got supremely annoying, but they had some fairly interesting weaponry."

[spoiler] ;)[/spoiler]

Sir Shadow

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Re: Campaign Thread IV: Losing Your Virginity is Easier in the Woods
« Reply #732 on: September 04, 2011, 01:09:15 AM »
Sir Shadow
[spoiler]"I gotta warn you, if you have any of the same ideas as the other Mages I have a Wand of Forced Bodily Intrusion.  Now then, what would you consider your magical specialty?" [/spoiler]
[spoiler]Bartholomeow is not really interested in a Wand of Forced Bodily Intrusion unless they are standard issue for the mage's guild. "Well, when I was in the academy, my major was Necromancy with a minor in Conjuration."[/spoiler]
[spoiler]"Necromancy is something we can use.  Got too many zombielike critters runnin' about because the the Mages Guild.  Someone needs ta study 'em.  You a necromancer from a religious point of view or is it more secular study.?"[/spoiler]
[spoiler]"My interest in necromancy is mostly academic; I'm no religious nut."[/spoiler]
[spoiler]You hear the ogre bellowing in the background.

"Well thank the Gawds for that we have enough of those running around now as it is.  Please fill out this application and leave us an address where we can contact you.  We start hiring soon."[/spoiler]
[spoiler]Bartholomeow shrugs and starts filling out paperwork.

konner09

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Re: Campaign Thread IV: Losing Your Virginity is Easier in the Woods
« Reply #733 on: September 04, 2011, 01:12:37 AM »
"Oh shit i'm screwed aren't I" Joseph says
[spoiler] Every generation has a teen heartthrob made for 16 and Tiger Beet magazine.

You can go back many years and there was a guy named Donny Osmond who probably every male teenager wanted to kick the crap out of. Leif Garrett, David Cassidy, The Mmm Bop kids, Justin timberlake, on and on.

This Bieber kid is just another of many over-hyped kids created? by the music machine geniuses to give them someone to grace the covers of 16 magazine and to get little teen girls excited. Random Youtuber [/spoiler]

I became insane, with long intervals of horrible sanity. - edgar allen poe

Radmelon

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Re: Campaign Thread IV: Losing Your Virginity is Easier in the Woods
« Reply #734 on: September 04, 2011, 02:40:50 PM »
"Calm down sir, I'm sure we will be able to resolve this peacefully."

bhu

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Re: Campaign Thread IV: Losing Your Virginity is Easier in the Woods
« Reply #735 on: September 04, 2011, 08:24:23 PM »
swivels head dramatically ""PEACEFULLY! YES! QUIETLY AND PEACEFULLY WILL HE BE TAKEN TO THE CHURCH FOR REMONSTRATION!

clambers to feet and peers about

*notices Joseph*

points dramatically

"YOOOOUUUuuuuuuuuuuu!"

konner09

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Re: Campaign Thread IV: Losing Your Virginity is Easier in the Woods
« Reply #736 on: September 04, 2011, 11:52:44 PM »
"I don't like the sound of this" turns to froggy " I thought benny said he would smooth things over with scooby" Joseph says
[spoiler] Every generation has a teen heartthrob made for 16 and Tiger Beet magazine.

You can go back many years and there was a guy named Donny Osmond who probably every male teenager wanted to kick the crap out of. Leif Garrett, David Cassidy, The Mmm Bop kids, Justin timberlake, on and on.

This Bieber kid is just another of many over-hyped kids created? by the music machine geniuses to give them someone to grace the covers of 16 magazine and to get little teen girls excited. Random Youtuber [/spoiler]

I became insane, with long intervals of horrible sanity. - edgar allen poe

bhu

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Re: Campaign Thread IV: Losing Your Virginity is Easier in the Woods
« Reply #737 on: September 05, 2011, 12:14:32 AM »
Clubby chimes in

"Scooby?  As in the hate Gawd?  Is it true he's always pissed about something?  "

Sir Shadow

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Re: Campaign Thread IV: Losing Your Virginity is Easier in the Woods
« Reply #738 on: September 05, 2011, 01:21:47 AM »
So about that paperwork?

bhu

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Re: Campaign Thread IV: Losing Your Virginity is Easier in the Woods
« Reply #739 on: September 05, 2011, 02:49:27 AM »
So about that paperwork?

Today's Date:

Your Name:

Other Names You May Be Known By(Don't lie, we'll know, and the Quartermaster will wand rape you):

Place of Residence:

Position Sought:

Available Start Date:

Education (some form of formal magical education is required):

Have you ever consorted with the Undead (This does not disqualify you from employment, but may require you to be looked over for possible infection by a healer)?

Have you ever consorted with Fiends or Angels, and do any of them currently have a rental contract, lien, or ownership of your soul (again this doesn't disqualify you, but we may need to have a healer give you the once over)?

Have you ever consorted with any other entities of power?

Are any Gawds currently pissed at you, or do you owe any of them favors for past help (Resurrection for example)?

Are any other powerful entities of foreign governments angry at you?

For that matter are you under contract to any foreign governments or organizations?

Have you ever been resurrected?

Have you committed any crimes (note this does not necessarily bar your employment unless you've been doing something pretty damn awful)?

Have you ever wanted to rule the world, or at least some portion of it (be honest)?

Do you have any religious beliefs?

Are you a member of any organizations, Guilds, cults, etc?

Do you have any ideologies or sexual deviations which may be a threat to the city, it's inhabitants, or reality as we know it?

Do you have any odd dietary restrictions, taboos, medical needs, or require exposure to any substances we should know of?

Are you forbidden from participating in anything, and if so why?

Are you vulnerable to mental and physical damage from anything we should know of?

Are you cursed or haunted?

Are you insane, and are you willing to submit to an examination to prove that?

Would you define yourself as Evil?

Are you the Minion of someone who would define themselves as Evil?

Have you ever been Undead or in an altered physical or mental state?

Would any of the above apply to your immediate circle of friends, coworkers, or relatives?

Do you own any magical items that may be cursed or problematical?

Same questions as all of the above, but applied to your familiar/other unspecified cohort or minion: